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The Last Resort (Mapton-on-Sea Book 1)
Sam Maxfield - 2017
Then meet the grandmother who raised her. Foul-mouthed, outrageous, orange-haired Gina Pontin. Two women who couldn’t be more different. When Gina has an accident the two of them are forced together in the last place Stella wants to return to. But as the June temperature soars in more ways than one, they, and the residents of Mapton-on-Sea, are in for an explosive summer no one will ever forget. 'The Last Resort has laugh out loud moments, tenderness and real heartbreak. This is a story of family and friendships which, ultimately, is as warm as the golden sand we feel between our toes. Great stuff. ' LeftLion Magazine
You've Done What, My Lord?: Hilarious tales from a country estate
Rory Clark - 2000
However, when James Aden takes up the position of Deputy Agent he does not realise the full extent of what the job entails.He finds himself spending his days negotiating with royalty, farmers, and even wildlife, as well as the imperious Lady Leghorn. In order to survive, James must come to terms with his role quickly, and not let himself get too distracted by Sophie, the pre-college assistant.
Drinking Custard: The Diary of a Confused Mum
Lucy Beaumont - 2021
From TV's award-winning comedy mum, Lucy Beaumont, comes her hilarious debut on the trials and tribulations of motherhood.
Motorcycle Therapy: A Canadian Adventure in Central America
Jeremy Kroeker - 2006
Join the horn-honking, signal-flashing, wheelie-popping pair as they endure painful bee stings, painful snakebites and (when they talk to girls) painful humiliation.
Andy Roddick Beat Me with a Frying Pan: Taking the Field with Pro Athletes and Olympic Legends to Answer Sports Fans' Burning Questions
Todd Gallagher - 2007
But some debates can never be settled no matter how much you run up your bar tab arguing with your friends. Well, it’s time to answer your questions once and for all: • Could an average guy start in the WNBA?• Would sumo wrestlers make great NFL linemen?• How easy is it for pro athletes to get laid? • How good are pro golfers at miniature golf?• Do pro athletes really play drunk or high?• How would a fan hit against a major league pitcher?To settle more than thirty of sports’ greatest (and most ridiculous) debates, Todd Gallagher has teamed up with coaches, general managers, and athletes—including LeBron James, Mike Tyson, Dwyane Wade, Johan Santana, Eddie George, Jose Canseco, and many others. But Gallagher didn’t just ask questions. He put these debates to the test—literally. He sent an all-midget lineup up against a pro baseball team. He swam freestyle against a doggie-paddling Olympic gold medalist. He recruited America's #1 darts player to test that uncanny accuracy in beer pong. And, yes, he stuck a frying pan in tennis star Andy Roddick’s hands and went to battle.The results are hilarious and enlightening. Best of all, once you have the answers you’ll be able to shut up the next loudmouth who tries to debate you at the bar.
A Million Little Lies
James Pinocchio - 2006
While there, Mr. Pinocchio meets all sorts of Fascinating Characters, one more Unbelievable and Amazing than the next, and they challenge him to confront his Deepest, Darkest Fears. The experience leads Mr. Pinocchio to the very edges of despair, but at a critical juncture he finds hope in the arms of a Bad Woman.The love affair ends tragically, alas, and, like many parts of Mr. Pinocchio's story, stretches credibility to the breaking point, but the harrowing adventure -- which involves a great deal of pain, a smattering of dirty sex, and endless amounts of girlish crying -- eventually leads to Redemption and Healing. But not for Mr. Pinocchio
The One You Want to Marry (And Other Identities I've Had): A Memoir
Sophie Santos - 2021
Growing up in 99.6 percent white communities, where girls had to learn to flash Vaseline-capped smiles before they’d be considered real women, Sophie adapted. Determined to fit in, she transformed from a tomboy misfit into a hormone-crazed beauty pageant contestant and a southern sorority girl, among other personalities. She nailed each role she took on, not shockingly, but nothing seemed to fit her true self.In her twenties, floundering and locked in her bedroom with lesbian YouTube clips playing on repeat, Sophie began to understand that her true self might be more tomboy misfit than southern belle. That realization set her off on a journey that led her through an unexpected lesbian puberty and eventually toward a New York comedy career.
Not Coming Soon to a Theater Near You (Kindle Single)
Neal Pollack - 2016
He uproots his family—including his wife, Regina, a painter with whom he shares a pact to always honor each other’s artistic pursuits—and moves to California.What follows is a funny and ultimately moving account of ridiculous bad timing and luck. In a monumental first step, Pollack accidentally options his life rights to a major film studio. From afar he watches as his new hipster-parenting memoir, Alternadad, garners actual vitriol from the national press. The Writer’s Guild goes on strike as soon as Pollack becomes a member, and—in his breakthrough moment—he stands before the head of comedy development at HBO to deliver his pitch…and forgets what he has to say.Not Coming Soon to a Theater Near You is a lighthearted look at one man’s ill-fated worming into the heart of Hollywood, the Silver Lake School District, and Los Angeles at large, but it also reveals a darn good marriage under significant duress.
Mr. Nuts and Mr. Balls
Richard Weiner - 2013
It is also wildly inappropriate for young children. Parents: Consider yourselves warned! "This book is disgusting, I want nothing to do with it." -- my son's sixth grade teacher. "You ought to be ashamed of yourself." -- old lady in parking lot. "Don't use your name and don't tell any of my friends." -- my mother. "..." -- twelve-year-old boy. (He couldn't speak. He was too busy laughing.)
Ruin Falls
Jenny Milchman - 2014
Instead, she feels uneasy. Her children, eight-year-old Reid and six-year-old Ally, have met their paternal grandparents only a handful of times. But Liz’s husband, Paul, has decided that, despite a strained relationship with his mother and father, they should visit the farm in western New York where he spent his childhood. On their way to the farm, the family stops at a hotel for the night. In the morning, when Liz goes to check on her sleeping children, all her anxiety comes roaring back: Ally and Reed are nowhere to be found. Blind panic slides into ice-cold terror as the hours tick by without anyone finding a trace of the kids. Soon, Paul and Liz are being interviewed by police, an Amber Alert is issued, and detectives are called in. Frantic worry and helplessness threaten to overtake Liz’s mind—but in a sudden, gut-wrenching instant she realizes that it was no stranger who slipped into the hotel room that night. Someone she trusted completely has betrayed her. Though she knows that Ally and Reid are safe, Liz will stop at nothing to find them and get them back. From her guarded in-laws’ unwelcoming farmhouse to the deep woods of her own hometown, Liz follows the threads of a terrible secret to uncover a hidden world created from dreams and haunted by nightmares.
Cheat: A Man's Guide to Infidelity
Bill Burr - 2012
Now, they impart all the wisdom, advice, and humor they picked up along the way, including how to: * Wipe away your shame and guilt—and get smart before you get hard * Conduct your filth with the right chick, in the right place, at the right time * Take an hour to shower and scour—and fight your worst enemy: glitter * Explain a strange scrunchy, hair extension, or pair of earrings to your girl * Navigate strip clubs, massage parlors, and women of the night * Lie like a woman—and call it quits without getting caught Featuring ten true stories from men who’ve lived the life and a link to watch Burr, DeRosa, and Kelly’s hilarious short film of the same name, Cheat is a wickedly smart field guide to philandering that will revolutionize your game.
Air Mail: Letters From The World's Most Troublesome Passenger
Terry Ravenscroft - 2007
But are they? He is probably the only man who has ever requested the recipe for an airline’s lasagna or wanted to enjoy his flight with an inflatable rubber woman sat on his knee. Prepare to meet the man who must have his diet of stir-fried mulberry leaves accommodated and the man who left his false teeth on a flight and is sure he recognized them on a later flight—in a flight attendant's mouth. Ravenscroft's correspondence tackles travel annoyances like excess baggage charges alongside more surreal letters, such as the one starting out asking an Australian airline if they offer an authentic Australian experience (for instance, Australian cuisine or in-flight movies) which then moves on to the question of at what age a baby is safe from being swallowed by a dingo.