It is highly recommended that you read "Gum" first.~WHAT DOESN'T KILL YOU MAKES YOU HUNGRIER.Rika's father, Chef Diego Martín, has finally been able to return to Los Angeles after 15 years, brought over to work in the VIP Center restaurant of the Temple of Microtology by its founders. But, a month later, his sous chef is found dead, and Diego is missing. Rika is panicked at the thought of losing her one living parent permanently. All she knows is that she has to find her father, and she needs Nick Owen by her side.Not one night passed in the last six months that Nick hasn't lain awake thinking of Rika, even though he's given up hope she'll contact him. It's for the best, anyway. He sent her away last summer because he wasn't right for her. But when she calls and asks him to fly to L.A., nothing can stop him from racing to her side.However, he may not be prepared for what he discovers in her hometown, like Rika's formidable grandmother who treats him like a molester, the fact that L.A. men find him really, really attractive, or the weird Hollywood cult members who are spying on him and Rika. Oh, and maybe worst of all--LeeAnne. Nick never wants to see tears in Paprika's beautiful eyes again. But is there really a chance of finding her father alive and solving the murder before the Microtologists get Rika, too?Read Dead Men Don't Eat Quiche now and find out! -Next book: Dead Men Don't Flip. To get book release notifications, have the opportunity to become a beta reader or read and reviewer, and other fun stuff, join Nina's reader group  at the NinaCordoba website.

    You'll discover original profiles of inspiring people, real-life dramas, insightful essays, and news roundups that get you up-to-date fast on the issues you care about. All the features and departments from the print edition are here, including the jokes and funny true stories, along with our famous Word Power column-now with automatic scoring and audio pronunciations. Each issue is enhanced with exclusive cartoons, videos, slide shows, animations, and useful Web links-all in a well-designed, easy-to-navigate interface.

    I’ve got three words for her. Bah freaking humbug. I hate Christmas. For the last 10 years, I’ve hated everything. Except for my girls. Perfect twins with their mother’s eyes. They want me to move on, but I’m too damaged to listen. Until Niki. Her sass makes my temper rise along with my mammoth… ego. And when I see her delicious curves under that dress, I want to bend her over her party plans and show her what’s waiting in her stocking this year. But giving her what she wants means letting go of the past, And I’m not ready to forget. I’ve got billions to keep me warm, I don’t need Niki too. Except I can’t imagine life without her. Time to turn my bah humbugs into Christmas kisses. Even bums like me need someone to love. I just hope I’m not too late... "Mine on Christmas" is a full length standalone romance with no cheating and no cliffhangers, but with plenty of steam and a HEA. I've also included a preview of my billionaire romance "Accidentally His" for you! - Sarah J. Brooks (USA Today Bestselling Author)

    Full of memorable characters and masterfully composed narrative, these short stories constitute a wonderful addition to any personal library, and are not to be missed by discerning collectors of Runyon's work. The stories contained herein include: Beach of Promise, Romance in the Roaring Forties, Dream Street Rose, The Old Doll's House, Blood Pressure, The Bloodhounds of Broadway, Tobias the Terrible, The Snatching of Bookie Bob, The Lily of St. Pierre, Earthquake, and more. Alfred Damon Runyon (1880 1946) was an American newspaperman and author, best remembered for his short stories about the world of Broadway in New York City that resulted from the Prohibition era. This volume is being republished now in an affordable, modern edition complete with a specially commissioned new biography of the author."

    He is going to change the face of British comedy.Unfortunately for the residents of north London, he's going to finance this dream by becoming a gardener.The result is The Day Job, an account of a year spent working in other people's gardens: people like Mrs Fleming who is convinced there is buried treasure in the bottom bed; Mr Walters who is trying to create a fascist state policed by gnomes in his well-guarded plot in Gospel Oak; Mrs Glover who is probably the most attractive woman living in Britain; and poor Mr Nugent, who likes to save his urine in jam jars and pour it over his compost.Over four seasons Wallington crosses Hampstead Heath from job to job. He survives brushes with the evil contract gardeners who keep trying to knock him off his bicycle. He strives to impress literary agent Herman Gapp who might represent him - depending on what sort of job he does on Gapp's Alpine Terrace. He even finds time to fall for a housecleaner-cum-actor named Helen, as he becomes part of a strange band of artistes, each with a day job of their own, all waiting for that first break.This is the story of long nights spent in the back room of a pub trying to write unsolicited scripts, and of much longer days spent trying to understand the British and their strange obsession with gardening.

    Entering a world of mysterious powers and nightmarish consequences, Chris realizes the secret belief of every teenage boy- that his wang has the power to change the world. The Monkey's Penis is the third installment in the terrifying Shingles series, and once again readers with weak hearts or bladders are advised to read on at their own risk...

    Bill Ryder STILL isn’t one of them.This omnibus edition contains the FINAL FOUR books of the bestselling Tome of Bill series - over 2000 pages of kick-ass action and geeky humor. A supernatural war, an ancient goddess, and a prophecy stating he’s destined to kill the woman he loves. Geek turned vampire Bill Ryder really doesn’t need this shit right now. Too bad that fate says otherwise. Now he’s got to become the hero he never wanted to be because otherwise the world and everyone in it will be royally screwed.Includes: GODDAMNED FREAKY MONSTERS (Book 5) Three months have passed since Bill Ryder mysteriously disappeared. Now he’s back and just in time because civilization is teetering on the brink of chaos. An ancient evil, the last remnant of a cult thought long dead, is about to cut a swath of destruction through the world not seen since biblical times. Bill’s only chance is to muster his friends and every last bit of attitude he can – because if he fails, Hell on Earth will become far more than just a corny saying. HALF A PRAYER (Book 6) An unstoppable terror has awoken deep beneath the Earth and it’s headed Bill’s way. To make matters worse, he’s been deemed a traitor by those he thought to be his allies. Now he finds himself fighting off enemies from all sides while warring with his feelings for the woman he loves. Talk about lousy timing for introspection. As the world crumbles around him, Bill must rise to the destiny he’s been trying to deny – because if he doesn’t, his love life will be the least of his worries. THE WICKED DEAD (Book 7) Bill Ryder has a powerful destiny. He just never expected it to involve an amnesiac bloodsucker, a bunch of D&D dorks, and a hormonal witch. Ordered to storm the vampire stronghold in Boston, Bill must approach the doorstep of the invincible undead warlord he’s destined to face. If he stands tall and faces his fate, the world might just have a chance of surviving. If he fails, an unquenchable evil will destroy everything he knows and loves. Why can’t the end of the world ever be easy? THE LAST COVEN (Book 8) A goddess returned, a war between primal powers, and a prophecy to fulfill. That’s a lot of crap to heap on anyone’s plate, but that’s exactly what Bill Ryder has to deal with. It’s finally time for him to master his powers, sort out his relationship woes, and figure out how to survive his date with destiny. Because if he can’t get his act together, the curtain will fall and mankind will be forever plunged into everlasting darkness. Join Bill in these tales full of monsters, mayhem, and foul-mouthed laughs. If you enjoy Jim Butcher, Kevin Hearne, or K.F. Breene then you're in for a bloody good time. Click BUY NOW and dive into the complete series today.

    Mykle Hansen's subversive tales capture the smugness of mainstream culture. He thrusts his characters into absurd and humorous situations that reveal the defects in the modern social fabric. With the wit of Christopher Moore, the inventiveness of Ter... Full description

    Both are pretty easy to put off as they're very expensive and tend to wreck your house.' Stand-up comedian Sam Avery (aka the Learner Parent) started his award-winning blog when his twin boys were born. A million nappies, Peppa Pig episodes and a lot less sleep later, he shares all the lows, highs and hilarious in-betweens of his experiences of first-time parenthood in this, his highly anticipated first book. Sam's honest, messy and laugh-out-loud account of trying for a baby (which transpired to be babIES) and figuring out what to do with them once they arrived - right up to the toddler years of talking, walking and tantrum-ing - will have you crying with laughter between your own nappy changes and nursery runs.

    When the system begins to misfire under the workload, the ill-equipped representatives of God and the Devil tasked with managing the process are given an ultimatum. Fix The Afternet or go back to your previous afterlives. They begin an odyssey through the hordes of souls awaiting judgement and the oblivious living in search of a solution. Rich in comic detail and populated with characters real and imagined from throughout time, their quest is never going to be straightforward…

    Written based off an outline of the events of Virgil’s Aeneid scribbled on the back of a cocktail napkin by a drunk, The Vagina Ass of Lucifer Niggerbastard is an epic tale told in a bizarro-author’s take on the ancient Homeric masters. Hey, all writers are thieves. It’s just illegal if the dead author you steal from hasn’t rotted enough yet. Actually, this book is pretty much nothing like the Aeneid. It’s more like the Odyssey, only more fucked up, more epic, and definitely more interesting to read. Is it a commentary on how fucked up things are yet again? Maybe. Probably. Yes. If you don’t have a sense of humor or “bad words” get your ass in a twist, don’t read this fucking book.

    Featuring birds from North and South America, Africa, Asia, Europe, and Oceania, author Matt Kracht identifies the dumb birds that manage to live all over the freaking place with snarky, yet accurate, names and humorous, anger-filled drawings.This guide book details exactly how much these morons suck with facts about each bird's (annoying) call, its (stupid) migratory pattern, and its (downright tacky) markings. Complete with a matching game, bird descriptor checklist, tips on how to identify a bird (you can tell a lot by looking into a bird's eyes, for example), this profanity-laden book offers a balance of fact and wit that will appeal to hardcore birders and casual bird lovers (and haters) alike.A MUST-HAVE: A must-have sequel to the bestselling parody book The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America.UNIQUE & LAUGH-OUT-LOUD FUNNY: This is a great coffee table or bar top conversation-starting book. And a bonus, while the content is humorous, it is practical and useful!A GREAT PRESENT: This is the perfect gift for the bird lovers and haters in your life. It also makes a great Mother's Day, Father's Day, birthday, retirement, or gag gift.Perfect for:• Birdwatching and nature enthusiasts• Armchair birders (or nonbirders)• Someone who needs a quirky gift for an animal lover friend• People with serious birders in their lives who want something lighthearted

    Takes a humorous look at inspirational self-help books by providing hundreds of depressing nuggets of wisdom.

    While few people were surprised that the Netflix series Stranger Things was a smash hit, no one expected that one of the show's minor characters, the nerdy, faithful underdog Barb, would break the internet. But Barb resonated with us--the chill, bespectacled BFF and her unjust abandonment hit a collective nerve. It turns out, in a world of Nancys, we are all Barb. Here we celebrate TV's most relatable, and tragic, bestie. Get Barb's hot tips on makeup and eyewear, as well as her do's and don'ts of party attendance. Have you ever wondered what Barb keeps in her bag (hint: Trapper Keepers and Bazooka gum) and what she would put on her dream mixtape? And find out whether or not you really are a Barb (maybe you're actually a Nancy, a Steve, or a Jonathan) with our -Which Hawkins High student are you?- quiz. With full-color illustrations throughout, The Book of Barb brings you inspiration from the ultimate wingwoman and trendsetting style icon--Barb has style tips, quotes, and life advice straight from the Upside Down.

    A policy with Stranger & Stranger can cover all of your interdimensional insurance needs. Rated "Number One in Customer Satisfaction" for three years running, no claim is too big or too weird for Tom Stranger to handle.But now Tom faces his greatest challenge yet. Despite being assigned the wrong—and woefully inadequate—intern, Tom must still provide quality customer service to multiple alternate Earths, all while battling tentacle monsters, legions of the damned, an evil call center in Nebraska, and his archnemesis, Jeff Conundrum. Armed with his Combat Wombat and a sense of fair play, can Tom survive? And will Jimmy the Intern ever discover his inner insurance agent?It's time to kick ass and adjust claims.Adam Baldwin (Firefly, Chuck) performs Larry Correia's madcap interdimensional tale of underwriting and space travel, where the only thing scarier than tentacle monsters is a high deductible.