Pretending You Care: The Retail Employee Handbook


Norm Feuti - 2007
    It has lured in the best of us with promises of employee discounts (a sham), the "fun" of working with people (not so much), and flexible hours (don't make me laugh). What we got instead: cranky customers, sadistic managers, idiotic coworkers, and, oh yeah, the hell that is doing inventory. But there are ways to lessen the pain, and this retail handbook will show you how. Inside you'll learn how to handle the crazies (both customers and coworkers), feign product knowledge, and make the best of working the register, all the while, of course, pretending you care. This book takes years of retail experience and condenses it into a guide that is as funny as it is useful. If you work in retail now, have done so in the past, or plan to do so in the future: this is the book for you.

Working from Home with a Cat


Heidi Moreno - 2020
    With colorful art and oh-so-relatable scenarios, Working from Home with a Cat takes readers through a day in the life of artist Heidi Moreno and her pet cat Peanut. From the time she wakes up until the time she goes to bed, she navigates working with her needy yet loveable feline companion, as Peanut walks over her paintings, hogs her chair, disrupts her yoga routine, and more.Despite all the struggles, cats like Peanut are always by our side when we need them, even on the hardest, loneliest workdays. Working from Home with a Cat reminds us why cats are the cutest colleagues and a source of comfort and calm in this chaotic world.• Perfect gift for any cat owner• Features funny and heartwarming scenarios anyone who has tried to concentrate at home with a cat has experienced• For readers who like How to Tell if Your Cat is Plotting to Kill You, Herding Cats by Sarah Scribbles, and You Need More Sleep: Advice from Cats by Francesco Marciuliano

Parenting Is Easy: You're Probably Just Doing It Wrong


Sarah Given - 2015
    Impossible, you say? Not according to advertisers who flood the web with stock photos of perfect parents and children. They’d have you believe that parenting is a piece of cake, and every significant moment of family life takes place on a spotless white couch. So when Sara Given, a real mother of a real toddler, saw a picture of a radiant new mother in a cute little sundress breastfeeding her newborn in the middle of a golf course, she finally had enough. She launched a Tumblr, which is now visited by tens of thousands of new parents looking for a daily pick-me-up. Because what better way is there to deal with the stress and strain of being a new parent than laughter? The perfect gift of cheer and solidarity, Parenting Is Easy exploits the disconnect between these preposterous photos and what happens in real life, and makes every reader laugh out loud—and feel better, too, because we’re in on the joke.

488 Rules for Life


Kitty Flanagan - 2019
    Providing you with the antidote to every annoying little thing, these rules are not made to be broken.488 Rules for Life is not a self-help book, because it's not you who needs help, it's other people. Whether they're walking and texting, asphyxiating you on public transport with their noxious perfume cloud, or leaving one useless square of toilet paper on the roll, a lot of people just don't know the rules. But thanks to Kitty Flanagan's comprehensive guide to modern behaviour, our world will soon be a much better place. A place where people don't ruin the fruit salad by putting banana in it … where your co-workers respect your olfactory system and don't reheat their fish curry in the office microwave ... where middle aged men don't have ponytails …What started as a joke on Kitty Flanagan's popular segment on ABC TV's The Weekly, is now a quintessential reference book with the power to change society. (Or, at least, make it a bit less irritating.) What people are (Kitty Flanagan is) saying about this book: 'You're welcome everyone.''Thank god for me.''I'd rather be sad and lonely, but right.''There's not actually 488 rules in here but it sure feels like it'.

Cat Diary: Yon & Muu; 猫日記よん&むー; Neko Nikki Yon to Mū


Junji Ito - 2009
    J-kun, a dog person, was coerced into adopting two cats by his fiancee A-ko: Muu, a Norwegian cat, and Yon who has an accursed face. Much to the chagrin of J, the cats do not immediately love him. The difference between fear and comedy is paper thin. Here's a cat comedy from a horror manga author.

You Had One Job!


Beverly L. Jenkins - 2016
    You Had One Job! is a collection of hilarious pictures featuring job-related disasters and general ineptitudes.If someone hangs a stop sign upside down or paints crooked lines on a highway, count on someone else to snap a photo and post it online.  You Had One Job! is a collection of hilarious pictures features job-related disasters and general ineptitudes.  All of these new, never-before-seen images will be accompanied by witty captions.

The Dirty Parts of the Bible


Sam Torode - 2007
    Tobias is obsessed with two things: God and girls. Mostly girls, of course. But being a Baptist preacher's son, he can't escape God. When his father is blinded in a bizarre accident (involving hard cider and bird droppings), Tobias must ride the rails to Texas to recover a long-hidden stash of money. Along the way, he's initiated into the hobo brotherhood by Craw, a ribald vagabond-philosopher. Obstacles arise in the form of a saucy prostitute, a flaming boxcar, and a man-eating catfish. But when he meets Sarah, a tough farm girl under a dark curse, he finds out that the greatest challenge of all is love.

The Dalai Lama's Cat


David Michie - 2012
    Why should His Holiness not have a cat?‘If only she could speak,’ continued the actress. ‘I’m sure she’d have such wisdom to share.’And so the seed was planted . . . I began to think that perhaps the time had come for me to write a book of my own—a book that would convey some of the wisdom I’ve learned sitting not at the feet of the Dalai Lama but even closer, on his lap. A book that would tell my own tale . . . how I was rescued from a fate too grisly to contemplate to become the constant companion of a man who is not only one of the world’s greatest spiritual leaders and a Nobel Peace Prize Laureate but also a dab hand with a can opener.” Starving and pitiful, a mud-smeared kitten is rescued from the slums of New Delhi and transported to a life she could have never imagined. In a beautiful sanctuary overlooking the snow-capped Himalayas, she begins her new life as the Dalai Lama’s cat.Warmhearted, irreverent, and wise, this cat of many names opens a window to the inner sanctum of life in Dharamsala. A tiny spy observing the constant flow of private meetings between His Holiness and everyone from Hollywood celebrities to philanthropists to self-help authors, the Dalai Lama’s cat provides us with insights on how to find happiness and meaning in a busy, materialistic world. Her story will put a smile on the face of anyone who has been blessed by the kneading paws and bountiful purring of a cat.

The Bloom County Library, Vol. 1: 1980-1982


Berkeley Breathed - 2009
    Bloom County ran from December 8th, 1980 to August 6th, 1989 and was published in an astounding 1200 newspapers on a daily basis. The huge popularity of Bloom County spawned a merchandizing bonanza, as well as two spin-off strips, Outland and Opus.The Bloom County Library Volume 1 highlights the first time the entire run of the immensely popular Bloom County strip has been collected in beautifully designed hard cover books with exceptional reproduction.The Library of American Comics is the world's #1 publisher of classic newspaper comic strips, with 14 Eisner Award nominations and three wins for best book. LOAC has become the gold standard for archival comic strip reprints...The research and articles provide insight and context, and most importantly the glorious reproduction of the material has preserved these strips for those who knew them and offers a new gateway to adventure for those discovering them for the first time." - ScoopWinner of the 2010 Eisner Award for Best Archival Collection/Project--Strips

Good in Bed


Jennifer Weiner - 2002
    Sure, her mother has come charging out of the closet, and her father has long since dropped out of her world. But she loves her friends, her rat terrier, Nifkin, and her job as pop culture reporter for The Philadelphia Examiner. She's even made a tenuous peace with her plus-size body. But the day she opens up a national women's magazine and sees the words "Loving a Larger Woman" above her ex-boyfriend's byline, Cannie is plunged into misery...and the most amazing year of her life. From Philadelphia to Hollywood and back home again, she charts a new course for herself: mourning her losses, facing her past, and figuring out who she is and who she can become.

When Parents Text: So Much Said...So Little Understood


Lauren Kaelin - 2011
    The parents are well-meaning but hopeless, silly and a little corny, and befuddled by the technology. The kids are bewildered yet patient: the perfect straight man. And the authors, two recent college graduates, Lauren Kaelin and Sophia Fraioli, have an unerring editorial instinct to select the funniest, sweetest, quirkiest, most-telling exchanges.Launched as a website just last year, www.whenparentstext.com is a phenomenon. It receives 300,000 to 500,000 page views a day, with features in The Huffington Post, Entertainment Weekly, College Humor, and more. When Parents Text includes the best of texts from the website, plus more than 50 percent all-new material never before published.Includes an emoticon glossary and 16-page color insert of MMS texts— multimedia messaging service, aka, bizarre photos from mom and dad. It’s the perfect gift for every text-savvy kid to give to his or her parents.

Is This Anything?


Jerry Seinfeld - 2020
    “Whenever I came up with a funny bit, whether it happened on a stage, in a conversation, or working it out on my preferred canvas, the big yellow legal pad, I kept it in one of those old school accordion folders,” Seinfeld writes. “So I have everything I thought was worth saving from forty-five years of hacking away at this for all I was worth.” For this book, Jerry Seinfeld has selected his favorite material, organized decade by decade. In page after hilarious page, one brilliantly crafted observation after another, readers will witness the evolution of one of the great comedians of our time and gain new insights into the thrilling but unforgiving art of writing stand-up comedy.

The Unstrung Harp


Edward Gorey - 1953
    Earbrass begins writing his new novel. Weeks ago he chose its title at random from a list of them he keeps in a little green note-book. It being tea-time of the 17th, he is alarmed not to have thought of a plot to which The Unstrung Harp might apply, but his mind will keep reverting to the last biscuit on the plate. So begins what the Times Literary Supplement called "a small masterpiece." TUH is a look at the literary life and its "attendant woes: isolation, writer's block, professional jealousy, and plain boredom." But, as with all of Edward Gorey's books, TUH is also about life in general, with its anguish, turnips, conjunctions, illness, defeat, string, parties, no parties, urns, desuetude, disaffection, claws, loss, trebizond, napkins, shame, stones, distance, fever, antipodes, mush, glaciers, incoherence, labels, miasma, amputation, tides, deceit, mourning, elsewards. You get the point. Finally, TUH is about Edward Gorey the writer, about Edward Gorey writing The Unstrung Harp. It's a cracked mirror of a book, and it's dedicated to RDP or Real Dear Person.

Guys Can Be Cat Ladies Too


Michael Showalter - 2013
    They say dogs are a man’s best friend. True! But what if that man’s girlfriend/boyfriend, wife/husband, or mother-in-law has a cat? Is that the end for him? Is he resigned to an eternity of estrangement from this furry creature with which he shares his life partner, his favorite chair, and his sock drawer?Showalter offers hope for men everywhere in their quest to understand and love cats. In this intimate portrait of one man’s love for cats, you will learn the answers to burning questions such as: “Why are they all aloof and weird and stuff?”; “They hate me, right?”; and “Is it true that they have nine lives?” Armed with these and countless other valuable lessons, by the book’s end any guy can be on the fast track to becoming a cat’s best friend.Praise for Guys Can Be Cat Ladies Too: “Deep stuff is decorated by fabulously absurd humor.”—Catster.com “So what have your cats taught you about loving yourself?” Michael Showalter: “Not a lot, I’ll be honest.”—Esquire.com “Fabulously illustrated.”—Entertainment Weekly

Zombies Hate Stuff


Greg Stones - 2012
    They also hate hippies, not to mention zip lines, penguins, moon penguins, nudists, weddings, sharing, and kittens. They really hate unicorns, strangely don't mind Canadians, and love YOU. Each of Greg Stones's ghoulishly colorful paintings reveal funny and unexpected scenes of zombie disgruntlement, cataloging the stuff that really riles up the walking dead (astronauts, rain, bagpipes, re-gifting, and more) with wit, humor, and, of course, brains. Zombies Hate Stuff offers an unexpected and irresistible perspective on the zombie apocalypse and the pop culture phenomenon that will not die. Plus, this is a fixed-format version of the book, which looks nearly identical to the print version.