Designer Relationships: A Guide to Happy Monogamy, Positive Polyamory, and Optimistic Open Relationships
Mark A. Michaels - 2015
These changes can and should empower people with the opportunity to develop partnerships based on their own sexualities, understandings, and agreements. This makes it possible to create what Kenneth Haslam, founder of the Kinsey Institute’s Polyamory Archive, has called “designer relationships.”Designer relationships may encompass: people who bond emotionally but not sexually; people who agree to be non-exclusive; single people who have occasional lovers or friends with benefits; couples who consciously choose to be monogamous; multiple partner configurations where long-term bonds exist among all or some; partnerships in which people are kinky and that make room to explore kink.The possibilities are limitless, and thinking about a partnership as something people can craft allows for flexibility and change. Relationships can open and close or have varying degrees and kinds of openness as circumstances demand. In the context of a designer relationship, decisions are made mutually, consciously, and deliberately.Designer Relationships will show you how to create the relationship that works for you, based on: · Free and enthusiastic choice.· Mutuality in defining the relationship and its structure.· Permission to consider all forms of relating.· Dedication to maintaining radical regard your partner(s).· Transparency about sexual history.Best-selling authors and nationally known relationship experts Patricia Johnson and Mark A. Michaels are exemplars of this life choice. This book explains exactly how you and your loved ones can design your own life and love.Editorial ReviewsReview"Michaels and Johnson's latest book on Designer Relationships takes my book, The New Monogamy one step further, past communication skills about monogamy agreements and into new ways to be transparent about all types of revolutionary forms of commitment that will take us forward into the 21st Century. Where my book left off, theirs continues and includes all the information any couple could ever want or need to create loving, open partnerships. Where most books only offer history and data, Mark and Patricia give practical advice and ground rules for trust, empathy and intimacy for collaborative non-monogamous relationship. We all need a book like this that integrates good tips and techniques and the words to define what we want from a partner; the freedom to choose. Whatever you are looking for, it is in this book. Written by a couple who really love one another and are committed to their work, this book comes at the perfect time, I am convinced it will help a lot of people."–Dr. Tammy Nelson, Author of The New Monogamy and Getting the Sex You Want"Thoughtful, honest and powerful! Reading this book is like rubbing a lamp to get your own Genie – but instead of magic, you’ll get practical guidance on how to create the relationship that’s ideal for you. Mark Michaels and Patricia Johnson speak from experience, lead from the heart, and open a space for true sexual freedom."–– Ricci Joy Levy, Executive Director, The Woodhull Sexual Freedom Alliance"Patricia Johnson and Mark Michaels explore far beyond one-size-fits-all coupling to a rainbow of choices, showing us all that the only ways our relationships are supposed to be are the ways we choose with one beautifully stated guideline: “Keep kindness as your touchstone.”"–– Dossie Easton, Author of The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures and Radical Ecstasy."How would you live and love if society, religion, and the media weren’t constantly “shoulding” all over you?" –– Jenny Block“Designer Relationships: A Guide to Happy Monogamy, Positive Polyamory, and Optimistic Open Relationships by Mark Michaels and Patricia Johnson is an insightful read into the different types of sexual and romantic relationships, It debunks the myths that tell us there is one type that works for everyone. It also imparts wisdom on how to navigate relationships for whichever type you find yourself in. I found this book to be a great starter guide for designing relationships that work for you."–Dr. Martha Tara Lee, author of Love, Sex and Everything In Between"I would highly recommend Designer Relationships to any couple who wants to explore opening up and wants to strengthen their relationship."–Shervon Laurice, MS, LCPC, LPCFrom the foreword:"Designer Relationships is a guidebook for these changing times and what is now available to anyone with a computer, a modicum of curiosity, and the willingness to take a risk and explore."–Ken Haslam, founder, Polyamory Archives of the Kinsey Institute
The Control Book
Peter Masters - 2007
It's about the processes involved, about taking control, using control, about ensuring that you have control, and-importantly-about giving control back once you are done with it. The book discusses how this works-the psychology of it-and looks at what can go right, and at what can go wrong and how to fix it. It considers the role of authority in the equation, and looks at how to manage the control you have over someone so that it is both effective and rewarding for you both. I believe that a very large part of the activities which we include under the umbrella of BDSM rely explicitly or implicitly on control being asserted over one person by another. My goal in this book is to talk about control, explain what it is, demonstrate it, show how to take it, how to give it, how to manage it, and more. I want you, the reader, to be aware of the ebb and flow of control around you and through you.
Submissive Training: 23 Things You Must Know About How To Be A Submissive. A Must Read For Any Woman In A BDSM Relationship (Women's Guide to BDSM)
Elizabeth Cramer - 2013
Submissive training isn’t just a “good idea” when it comes to creating a BDSM relationship. It is essential. "Submissive Training: 23 Things You Must Know On How To Be A Submissive" is designed to help you know what to expect when you go through training with a new Dom. Every couple is unique and every Dom may have different ways of teaching you the systems of service he prefers. However, these are the basics all trained subs and slaves learn and employ in daily life. Rushing into a relationship or service contract with a Dom without training puts the future of your time together at risk. All of the arguments, resistance, misunderstandings and hurt feelings that go with a new submissive’s experiences can be eradicated by a period designated for learning, listening, trial and error. Even if you have been with a previous Dom you will need to go through an abbreviated training time to ensure your patterns and understandings match one another. Training is a way to "get in the same rhythm” and find the perfect groove. If you are a Dom, this guide is the perfect gift to give to your new sub. If you are a sub, this guide will teach you how to go through your submissive training. As you go through these things on the journey to become the woman you were made to be, you will be tested but you will also be proud, joyful and, perhaps for the first time in your life, you will be at peace.
Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the Twenty-First Century
Barbara Carrellas - 2005
With a juicy mix of erotic how-to and pleasure-centered spiritual wisdom, acclaimed sex educator Barbara Carrellas radically updates the ancient practice of Tantra for modern sexual explorers desiring to push past their edge in search of the great cosmic orgasm.With more than one hundred easy-to-follow techniques for expanded orgasmic states and solo and partner play (as well as more adventurous practices), this in-depth guide reveals the delicious worlds of ecstasy available to all, including:The Erotic Awakening Massage • Breath and Energy Orgasms • Twenty-Minute Tantra Evolutionary Selfloving • Sex and Healing • Tantric BDSMNo matter what your gender, sexual preference, or erotic tastes, URBAN TANTRA will expand your notions about pleasure and open you up to new heights of intimacy and sexual fulfillment.
The Modern Kama Sutra: The Ultimate Guide to the Secrets of Erotic Pleasure
Kamini Thomas - 2005
The 2,000-year-old Kama Sutra is widely regarded as the most famous work on erotic pleasure ever created. This original new interpretation of the Hindu sex classic features 40 easy-to-follow explicit positions, each beautifully illustrated by stunning color photographs, step-by-step instructions, difficulty ratings, and relevant quotes from the original text. From slow and gentle to fast and intense, the positions fulfill every mood and sexual need, and are designed to heighten pleasure from both a man's and woman's perspective. Separate chapters explore the body, senses, mood, foreplay, and oral sex, offering creative ways to bring new levels of eroticism into lovemaking. A book that couples will want to keep by their bedside tables and refer to again and again, The Modern Kama Sutra is the ultimate book for modern lovers.
Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life
Emily Nagoski - 2015
So where is it? Well, for reasons this book makes crystal clear, that pill will never exist—but as a result of the research that’s gone into it, scientists in the last few years have learned more about how women’s sexuality works than we ever thought possible, and Come as You Are explains it all.The first lesson in this essential, transformative book by Dr. Emily Nagoski is that every woman has her own unique sexuality, like a fingerprint, and that women vary more than men in our anatomy, our sexual response mechanisms, and the way our bodies respond to the sexual world. So we never need to judge ourselves based on others’ experiences. Because women vary, and that’s normal.Second lesson: sex happens in a context. And all the complications of everyday life influence the context surrounding a woman’s arousal, desire, and orgasm. Cutting-edge research across multiple disciplines tells us that the most important factor for women in creating and sustaining a fulfilling sex life, is not what you do in bed or how you do it, but how you feel about it. Which means that stress, mood, trust, and body image are not peripheral factors in a woman’s sexual wellbeing; they are central to it. Once you understand these factors, and how to influence them, you can create for yourself better sex and more profound pleasure than you ever thought possible.And Emily Nagoski can prove it.
Mating in Captivity: Reconciling the Erotic and the Domestic
Esther Perel - 2006
She invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home.In her 20 years of clinical experience, Perel has treated hundreds of couples whose home lives are empty of passion. They describe relationships that are open and loving, yet sexually dull. What is going on?In this explosively original book, Perel explains that our cultural penchant for equality, togetherness, and absolute candor is antithetical to erotic desire for both men and women. Sexual excitement doesn't always play by the rules of good citizenship. It is politically incorrect. It thrives on power plays, unfair advantages, and the space between self and other. More exciting, playful, even poetic sex is possible, but first we must kick egalitarian ideals and emotional housekeeping out of our bedrooms.While Mating in Captivity shows why the domestic realm can feel like a cage, Perel's take on bedroom dynamics promises to liberate, enchant, and provoke. Flinging the doors open on erotic life and domesticity, she invites us to put the "X" back in sex.©2006 Esther Perel (P)2006 HarperCollins Publishers
Insatiable Wives: Women Who Stray and the Men Who Love Them
David J. Ley - 2009
It is called by many names, and lived in a variety of ways by different couples. The most common terms used to describe it are 'hotwife' or 'cuckold lifestyle.' This sexual practice, a form of sexual nonmonogamy, is distinguished from swinging and polyamory in that the husband rarely seeks sexual contact outside the marriage except for participation in group sex with his wife and other men, while the wife is permitted and often encouraged to pursue unrestrained sexual encounters with other men. The author includes interviews and comments from couples living the lifestyle throughout the U.S., and presents the stories in an attempt to determine the history of this sexual practice and its role in society and in relationships. He explores the psychological, social, biological, and evolutionary underpinnings of this uncommon and socially taboo behavior in an effort to make it more comprehensible to those engaged in the lifestyle and those who are just curious.
Good Vibrations Guide to Sex: The Most Complete Sex Manual Ever Written
Cathy Winks - 1994
For ALL readers--women and men, heterosexual or lesbian, gay, or bisexual--this candid, upbeat guide offers expert advice on all aspects of sexuality:• How to talk about sex and keep your relationships sizzling• Orgasms--G-spot, female ejaculation, and multiple orgasms for both men and women• "If you want the job done right, do it yourself"--Expanded section on masturbation• NEW! Sex Over a Lifetime--Growing up, coming out, pregnancy, parenting, midlife cycles, and aging• NEW! Teens Sexual Bill of Rights• Real stories--Hundreds of real people talk about real sex• NEW! Dealing with disability, depression and other medical issues• Fantasy--Favorite themes, games, and power play• Comprehensive guide to erotica....in print, on screen, and on the internet• NEW! Latest sex toy innovations from cyberskin to microchips• Complete guide to vibrators, dildos, lubricants, and other sex gear, and how to introduce sex toys into your sexual repertoirr
The Whole Lesbian Sex Book: A Passionate Guide for All of Us
Felice Newman - 1999
First published in 1999, it's been lauded for its thoroughness, enthusiastic tone, and creative, nonjudgmental approach to lesbian sex in all its rich variety. (Library Journal lamented, "Why can't more heterosexual sex manuals be this good?") Now, five years later, sex educator Felice Newman has completely updated this classic guide. There is new information throughout, up-to-date research, fresh quotes from women who share their real-world experiences, a greatly expanded resource guide, new illustrations, and an entire new chapter on sex and partnership.Topics include:Where to find sex partners (and how to talk to your lovers about sex). Discovering your desires and fantasies.How to have all the orgasms you desire--G-spot orgasms, multiple orgasms, extended orgasms, and ejaculation.Why communication is the most important erotic skill you can offer your partners.How masturbation can improve your sex life.Expert how-to information on cunnilingus, anal sex, vaginal fisting, and other favorite lesbian sex techniques.How to choose vibrators, dildos, and harnesses, and get the most out of your sex toys.And much more.
The Joy of Sex
Alex Comfort - 1972
It has been revised in such a way to retain Dr Comfort's original, revelatory advice while making it appropriate for the 21st century.
Nina Hartley's Guide to Total Sex
Nina Hartley - 2006
As a sex performer, sexual adventurer, and sex educator, she's done the fieldwork and has taken extensive notes. Now, she's ready to share her research. Let's just say that she's had all the sex-the good, the bad, and the indifferent-so you won't necessarily have to! Nina Hartley's Guide to Total Sex is for sexual pioneers and enthusiastic novices. Unabashedly erotic, the book covers a lot of territory, allowing readers to sample the whole smorgasbord or just nibble at what they see as the choicest bits. To start things off, Nina includes explicitly detailed chapters on foreplay, oral sex, masturbation, toys, and games. Sexual adventurers (and voyeurs) will find chapters on swinging, three-ways, anal sex, erotic domination, sensual submission, and much more. Nina is a strong advocate of safe sex, physically and emotionally, and she helps readers establish personal ground rules. But as a sexual liberationist and a feminist, her core belief is that, between consenting adults, all sexual behaviors are a matter of personal choice. Whether you're trying to reignite the passion with a longtime spouse, or explore new terrain with a new lover, Nina offers a variety of ideas to achieve exhilarating, deeply satisfying, intimate, and profoundly liberating sex.
Essence of Shibari: Kinbaku and Japanese Rope Bondage
Shin Nawakari - 2017
Japanese-style bondage artist Shin Nawakiri shares his safe, sexy, and beautiful techniques in this newly-translated book, which contains numerous ties for the beginner artist and for intermediate or advanced players, including: sensual body wrapping without knots, binding one wrist or body column, body harnesses, futomomo (thigh ties), and takate kote (chest and arm binding). Explore the history of kinbaku, practical shibari for graceful and steamy play, the psychology of bondage (for those tying and those being bound), and more. Now is your time to enjoy this delicious form—learning from a renowned rope artist in the privacy of your home.
Slow Sex: The Art and Craft of the Female Orgasm
Nicole Daedone - 2011
Slow Sex can change that. Better sex is about one thing: better orgasm. This life-altering guide teaches men and women how to use the practice of Orgasmic Meditation-or OM-to slow down, connect emotionally, and achieve authentic female sexual satisfaction. The promise: In just fifteen minutes every woman can become orgasmic. And, with the right partner and the right technique, that orgasm could last and last! For more than a decade, Nicole Daedone has been leading the "slow sex movement," which is devoted to the art and craft of the female orgasm. OM is the act of slowing down, tuning in, and experiencing a deeper spiritual and physical connection during sex. Slow Sex reveals the philosophy and techniques of OM and includes a step-by-step, ten-day OM starter program, as well as OM secrets for achieving ultimate satisfaction. It also includes exercises to help enhance readers' "regular" sex lives, such as Slow Oral for Her, Slow Oral for Him, and Slow Intercourse. This book is the argument for daily intimacy, and for paying attention as the foundation of pleasure, all with a focus on the female experience.
Leather Folk
Mark Thompson - 1991
This groundbreaking anthology looks at the history of the leather and S/M movement.