While misunderstandings surrounding these communities prevail, BDSM sexuality cuts across race, gender, nationality, and sexual orientation. BDSM describes forms of sexuality that incorporate restraint, pressure, sensation, training, and elements of both erotic and non-erotic power exchange between the engaged parties. Some BDSM "scenes" include role-playing, spanking, blindfolds, ropes, and erotic costuming. Sexual Outsiders is designed as a guide for BDSM community members who must wade through the quagmire of unique problems they face: coming out to family, friends and partners; distinguishing abusive relationships from healthy consensual ones; finding and developing community; overcoming shame and denial; exploring whether BDSM sexuality can be a healing tool; gaining access to quality, culturally competent psychotherapy; and finding strategies to develop a healthy sexual self-esteem in the face of current medical and social standards that view them as sick or pathological. The book also serves as an educational primer for those whose partners, friends, and family members are involved in BDSM. In terms of challenges faced by BDSM communities, the most significant is living with a stigmatized sexuality shame, prejudice, discrimination, isolation, depression, and a lack of adequate, competent mental health care. Issues such as coming out as a sexual minority, finding community and partners, and dealing with scenes and relationships that go wrong are some the common experiences shared by members of BDSM communities. Sexual Outsiders employs common sense, good humor, and vivid anecdotes while incorporating basic ideas about human behavior, psychology, philosophy, interviews, history, and clinical case studies to illustrate the real lives and experiences of men and women in BDSM communities. Anyone wanting to learn more about this unique, and more-common-than-you-think expression of sexuality, will find in these pages insight into the various challenges BDSM practitioners face, and the many strengths that people in the BDSM communities have developed in the face of social stigma and prejudice.

    While the topics are exotic and erotic, the authors handle each one in a sensitive, thorough, analytical, and fascinating way and manage to explain a secret world to those who might wish to visit.

    It's about the processes involved, about taking control, using control, about ensuring that you have control, and-importantly-about giving control back once you are done with it. The book discusses how this works-the psychology of it-and looks at what can go right, and at what can go wrong and how to fix it. It considers the role of authority in the equation, and looks at how to manage the control you have over someone so that it is both effective and rewarding for you both. I believe that a very large part of the activities which we include under the umbrella of BDSM rely explicitly or implicitly on control being asserted over one person by another. My goal in this book is to talk about control, explain what it is, demonstrate it, show how to take it, how to give it, how to manage it, and more. I want you, the reader, to be aware of the ebb and flow of control around you and through you.

    The definitive handbook on Domination and Submission (D/s) relationships and the BDSM lifestyle. A must-read for anyone considering or curious about non-traditional relationships within a fetish culture context. Funny, insightful, educational, and inspiring. Author Michael Makai goes in-depth on Dominants, submissives, switches, primals, and their relationship dynamics. Learn about BDSM activities, bondage, toys, groups, protocols, and safety. This book even dares to go where others fear to tread: The Gorean subculture, online D/s & BDSM, first meetings, religion vs. kink, and what could go wrong. You'll love Michael Makai's irreverent and humorous treatment of this subject as he gives you the benefit of his 35+ years of experience in the D/s and BDSM lifestyles. (Paperback, 496 pages)

    If you are new to dominance, still figuring out just what it’s all about or what you want it to mean to you, then this book will provide you with a solid foundation from which to start. If you already practice dominance and are interested in improving your ability to create deep and lasting power dynamics then you’ll find many advanced concepts and concrete techniques to integrate into your own personal style. What consensual dominance means here is any kind of intentional, mutually desired, mutually fulfilling exercise of power and control between partners. There are a lot of different kinds of connections that fit that broad definition, and the fundamental principles that this book explores can be applied to any of them. So it should be just as valuable whether you practice dominance in occasional intense evenings within an otherwise egalitarian relationship, in a full-time power exchange relationship, in long distance or online relationships, in pick-up play with strangers at BDSM clubs, or anywhere else. This book also doesn’t assume that you fit any stereotype about what a person who dominates should look or act like. It looks at dominance as a practice -- as something that any person can learn to do, rather than something that some people are -- and it is meant for anyone with a desire to learn to practice dominance well. It is written to be accessible to absolute beginners, as well as to switches and primals and tops and mommies and daddies and bigs and masters and trainers and Goreans and heads-of-house and owners and label-defying powerplayers. (And don’t worry if you have no idea what any of those labels means – dominance has nothing to do with labels.) If you have an interest in the bedrock principles of inspiring, deepening, maintaining and enjoying control over a person who dearly, desperately wants you to control them, then this book is for you.

    This book defines and explains more real-life sexual fetishes than anyone has imagined to date. In plain and playful language, bestselling author Violet Blue shows readers how to enjoy sexual fetishes as a healthy sex toy just like any other, no matter how ordinary or unusual. This completely revised, updated and expanded second edition makes Fetish Sex the most complete book on sexual fetishes available.Think you might have a fetish? This guide tells you if you do, or not. And if you do, this is where to learn how to make the most of it in safety, pleasure and answers questions about sharing fetishes. The truth is, "normal" sex is exactly the kind of sex you enjoy.Fetish Sex is packed with information and guidance for individuals of all genders and sexual orientations, for singles and solos, for couples, and for sex educators everywhere. Fetishes are clearly defined; rubber, medical, age-play, human animals, panties, corsets, shoes, body parts, Japanese curiosities, human dolls, cross-dressing, sissies, strange or shocking, extreme and impossible fetishes, and much more are included in detail.Fetish Sex features several explicit erotic short stories by novelist Thomas Roche, graphically illustrating sex with different fetishes. Resources include websites, fetish entertainment, etiquette, safety, books, communities, and information on finding fetish-aware therapists.This guide is for understanding, controlling and making the most of your - or your lover’s - fetish.

    Founder and Publisher Emerita Joani Blank, then working as a sex educator and counselor, started writing her own books about sexuality at her clients' and other therapists' behest.The press currently has a list of eighteen sexual self-awareness titles, including innovative and practical non-fiction with non-judgmental techniques for strengthening sexual communication. Down There Press also publishes lively literary and photographic erotica.

    The inhabitants of this cosmos are real people striving to meet the challenges of their chosen existence. A compelling novel, both thought provoking and bursting with raw sexuality.

    Both lifestyles are on the cutting-edge frontiers of romantic and sexual relating, and for a long time practitioners of both have found little sympathy in either camp. This is the first book of its kind that navigates the waters of effective polyamory and power exchanges, with many essays from the brave practitioners who swim there.

    Now, for the first time, an experienced fister and fistee explains in detail how to fist with the greatest possible safety and pleasure. Extensively illustrated, this long-awaited guide by Deborah Addington has been approved by three fisting-positive physicians and by many experienced practitioners. Also includes an eye-opening section of anecdotes and poetry by fisting-lovers, plus an extensive resource guide. A must-have "handbook" for the sexually explorative!

    Whether you want to explore your own submissive fantasies, or you're just curious about what BDSM is really like, this book will answer all your questions, plus some you didn't know you had. Erotic author Kate Kinsey ("Red," and "The Totally Uncensored Kinky Adventures of Chloe St. Claire, Sex Slave") brings over a decade of experience as a submissive and kinky educator to this practical step-by-step guide to being a healthy and happy submissive. Topics covered include: the differences between dominants and masters, submissives and slaves, and tops and bottoms; the different dominant styles; the truth about "training" to be a submissive; how to find like-minded folks in your area; how to negotiate scenes and relationships; what to expect at your first dungeon party; why some people actually enjoy pain; and the warning signs to look out for when talking to potential partners. "Kinsey has written a no-nonsense guide that thoroughly explains the various kinks and fetishes that come under the umbrella of BDSM. Most importantly, she emphasizes the importance of protecting yourself along the way with knowledge, friends and self-awareness." "This is not fiction, but reality. Kate Kinsey has the experience to tell it like it is, not the way some vanilla writer imagines it to be."

    In this book, famed bondage riggers the Two Knotty Boys show readers how to tie basic knots and use them in sensual bondage techniques. With the help of renowned photographer Ken Marcus, the Boys use more than 750 full-color photos to illustrate the techniques for turning rope into rope bondage. Easy-to-follow captions and clear, step-by-step images allow readers to learn at their own pace, review entire techniques at a glance, or lay the book flat on a bed or table and follow along as they subdue their partner. Written in a playful style that makes rope bondage safe and approachable, and covering a wide range of techniques from basic ties to decorative ropework pieces, Two Knotty Boys Back on the Ropes is the perfect bedside companion for curious newcomers and serious players alike.

    Margot Weiss’s research entailed attending dungeon play parties, workshops on SM techniques, and business meetings of the Society of Janus, one of America’s oldest BDSM organizations. She interviewed more than sixty SM practitioners, including dungeon owners, well-known prodommes (professional dominants), and community experts. Weiss vividly evokes the feel of the BDSM scene in San Francisco area in the early 2000s.At the same time, she challenges notions of SM as inherently transgressive, revealing a technique-oriented community, largely organized around classes, rules, and the acquisition of expensive sex toys. Most members of the Bay Area’s BDSM community were white, heterosexual, middle-aged, well-off, and involved in long-term relationships.Weiss analyzed SM “scenes”—sexual encounters involving roles, costumes, and props—including dramatizations of slave markets and the creation of the Abu Ghraib photographs. She contends that such performances eroticize social inequality, reproducing hierarchies based on race, ethnicity, gender, and sexuality, rather than offering a safe space, separate from real-world inequities.

    Whether readers want to get up close and personal with blindfolds, crops, and paddles or are just looking for some inspiration to keep things fresh in the bedroom, 50 Shades of Kink is ideal for everyone and their lover(s). Included are techniques and creative ideas for bondage, spanking, flogging, sensation play, and rough sex; lessons on how to eroticize power, cultivate deeper connections, and incorporate kink into one's sex life; and role-playing fantasies from the popular to the taboo.

    When Califia opens the doors to his imagination, there is no predicting what might spill out: A submissive female android turns the tables on her abusive master in the very funny and nasty "Dolly", Little Red Riding Hood gets a millennial makeover and two 1950s teens discover the front seat of the car is a lot more fun than Your Hit Parade. Continuing the boundary smashing tradition of Macho Sluts and Melting Point, No Mercy is leather-flavored fiction without a safeword -- smart, challenging, intellectual, funny, transgressive, and hotter than the gates of hell. For her legions of fans who have been panting for more, Pat Califia is back with a vengeance!