Still Life with Woodpecker


Tom Robbins - 1980
    It reveals the purpose of the moon, explains the difference between criminals and outlaws, examines the conflict between social activism and romantic individualism, and paints a portrait of contemporary society that includes powerful Arabs, exiled royalty, and pregnant cheerleaders. It also deals with the problem of redheads.

Texts from Dog II: The Dog Delusion


October Jones - 2013
    

Butterfly Brain


Barry Cryer - 2004
    Barry's set of experiences with these legends of humour is unique, and will delight all who made PIGS CAN FLY a runaway porcine bestseller. In this completely new, organically grown book, old Baz recalls, reminisces, recounts and other words beginning with 'R', on a trip down Memory Lane, pausing only for tea and macaroons at the Stannah Stairlift Cafe. What memories - if only he can remember them. Currently 74, a third of his life has already passed and he invites you to enjoy this wonderfully funny account of it, a decorous orgy of nostalgia.

Wigfield: The Can-Do Town That Just May Not


Amy Sedaris - 2004
    In his desperate search for a small town dying in America, intrepid journalist Russell Hokes stumbles upon a quarter-mile stretch of concrete and gravel dotted with strip clubs and used auto parts shops. Welcome to Wigfield. Population: vague. Upon his arrival, Russell Hokes wanders the streets searching for the salt of the earth. Instead he finds a town in crisis. Why State Representative Bill Farber wants to tear down the Bulkwaller Dam, thereby flooding the town. Will Russell Hokes save the town? Is Wigfield merely posing as a town to collect federal disaster relief? Won't you please buy this book?

That's a Fact, Jack!


Harry Bright - 2006
    Some of the facts are funny. Some are surprising. And some are just plain weird. But all of them are true—and irresistibly fascinating!You'll find information on virtually every subject under the sun, including: Philosophy: On February 8, 2000, the meaning of life was auctioned on eBay. The winning bid was $3.26. Popular Culture: Charlie Chaplin once lost a Charlie Chaplin look-alike contest. Science: Dolly the sheep—the first cloned mammal—was named after country singer Dolly Parton. Sex: The largest human cell is the female ovum. The smallest is the male sperm. Sports: The average lifespan of an NHL hockey puck is 7 minutes. Statistics: On average, women utter 7,000 words a day while men manage just over 2,000.

MTV's Beavis and Butthead's Ensucklopedia


Mike Judge - 1994
    Beavis and Butt-head give us their view of the world from A to Z in their own version of an encyclopedia--just in time for Christmas. Illustrated.

Girls Don't Poop: Lessons in Anatomy, Hygiene and Sexual Promiscuity


Jen Ashton - 2011
    Getting so tall and mature. Why, you can barely recognize yourself from just a few short months ago-back when you were so young. Your body is changing. Changes can be scary. Especially for girls, and, gosh, it can be confusing." Nope. No way. That's not this book. This is NOT your mother's coming-of-age manual. In the comedic likes of Chelsea Handler, author Jen Ashton breaks sex-education tradition and begins her hilariously endearing journey to womanhood with stories of growing up a tomboy in Middle America, circa the 1980's. Packed with iconic pop culture, nostalgic geekery, and a healthy dose of self-deprecation, Ashton foregoes the conventional route of learning how to be a lady and dives right in, enlisting the help of Cosmo, Hustler and her anal-loving housekeeper. Forget dancing around the dutiful explanations passed on from generation to generation-tales of 'the red curse' and 'your changing body.' Ashton's rites of passage are chock-full of unique life lessons learned the extracurricular way. From bodily functions to breast enlargement, pregnancy prevention to purgatory, learn the real facts of life as only she can describe them. If you're lucky, you might even discover the answer to the age-old question: Do Girls Poop? If you thought your journey through puberty was rough, be prepared to finally feel normal. Girls Don't Poop is a jaw-dropping, side-splitting adventure of one clueless tomboy's quest to figure out women, so that she could inevitably become one.

Punching Tom Hanks: Dropkicking Gorillas and Pummeling Zombified Ex-Presidents---a Guide to Beating Up Anything


Kevin Seccia - 2011
    It's teeming with savages, thugs, angry toddlers, and disgruntled clowns. And every one of them is secretly mulling a scenario that ends with them kicking you square in the junk. What do you do if you want to take on The Batman and live to brag about it to your kids? What do you do if a rabid alligator picks a fight with your little sister? What do you do if the beloved star of "Forrest Gump" tells you to "shut the hell up" in front of a huge crowd?You read this book. It offers simple, effective instructions for beating up zombies, robots, co-workers—anything. The only limits are your imagination... and your habit of not following through on things, and possibly your uncoordinated, at times comically frail body.

Funny, You Don't Look Like a Grandmother


Lois Wyse - 1988
    The perfect book for the Nana of today, it will make you laugh, it will make you cry...it will make you want to run out and buy something nice for your grandchild!

My Misspent Youth: Essays


Meghan Daum - 2001
    From her well-remembered New Yorker essays about the financial demands of big-city ambition and the ethereal, strangely old-fashioned allure of cyber relationships to her dazzlingly hilarious riff in Harper's about musical passions that give way to middle-brow paraphernalia, Daum delves into the center of things while closely examining the detritus that spills out along the way. She speaks to questions at the root of the contemporary experience, from the search for authenticity and interpersonal connection in a society defined by consumerism and media; to the disenchantment of working in a "glamour profession"; to the catastrophic effects of living among New York City's terminal hipsters. With precision and well-balanced irony, Daum implicates herself as readily as she does the targets that fascinate and horrify her. In a review of The KGB Bar Reader, in which Daphne Merkin singled out Daum's essay about the inability to mourn a friend's death, Merkin wrote: "It's brutally quick, the way this happens, this falling in love with a writer's style. Daum's story hooked me by the second line. Hmm, I thought, this is a writer worth suspending my routines for."

An Embarrassment of Riches


James Howard Kunstler - 1985
    An historical comedy about two bumbling botanists sent into the southern wilderness by Thomas Jefferson to look for something that isn't there. A novel in the spirit of Lewis and Clark (who make cameo appearences). Replete with wild Indians, river pirates, the kidnapped son of King Louis XVI, the lost colony of Roanoke, and much more. A non-stop romp full of life and humor and the sensibility of early America.

Khushwant Singh's Joke Book III


Khushwant Singh - 1992
    Another super collection of naughty and not-so-naughty jokes, humorous anecdotes, comic interludes, hilarious situations and bitchy remarks, selected by Khushwant Singh from amongst the thousands contributed by his readers and fans - and some manufactured by him.

Disapproving Rabbits


Sharon Stiteler - 2007
    Feed them tasty veggies, they'll disapprove of your culinary skills. Sit together in your yard, and they'll disapprove of your gardening (even as they devour it).Long thought of as mindless raiders of gardens and happy couriers of colored eggs, it's almost as if rabbits have been getting the best of us for years, secretly disapproving of all our non-rabbit ways.Fortunately Sharon Stiteler, known as the Bird Chick for her work in the birding community, began to notice something not-quite-right about her pet rabbit Cinnamon. It appeared that Cinnamon didn't approve . . . of anything. After studying a great many photos, Sharon has soundly and without-out-a-doubt proved that rabbits have some major attitude.

Pete, Drinker of Blood


Scott S. Phillips - 2012
    He’s also a vampire. He lives alone and avoids the other vampires in L.A., but Pete’s simple life goes haywire when he falls for Angie, the cute bartender at a Sunset Strip dive -- and when sinister vampire lord Carson Fitzgerald returns to claim his children, Pete learns that nothing's ever easy for a creature of the night.

Isn't it well for ye? The Book of Irish Mammies


Colm O'Regan - 2012
    She's never short of advice, a kind word and a cup of tea (making sure to scald the teapot first, of course).Bring the coat anyway. If it's too hot you can take it off.Comedian Colm O'Regan explores the phenomenon of the Irish Mammy and what she might say about everything from the 'new mass' to the cardinal sin of not owning a cough bottle and the importance of airing clothes properly. The global influence of the Irish Mammy, through history, science, politics and literature, is undeniable. Did you know, for instance, that Hamlet had an Irish Mammy?So if you're an Irish Mammy, have one, know one or suspect you might be turning into one, this book will act as your guide. But be aware that though this book might think it knows it all, it doesn't, only Mammy knows it all.