She's never short of advice, a kind word and a cup of tea (making sure to scald the teapot first, of course).Bring the coat anyway. If it's too hot you can take it off.Comedian Colm O'Regan explores the phenomenon of the Irish Mammy and what she might say about everything from the 'new mass' to the cardinal sin of not owning a cough bottle and the importance of airing clothes properly. The global influence of the Irish Mammy, through history, science, politics and literature, is undeniable. Did you know, for instance, that Hamlet had an Irish Mammy?So if you're an Irish Mammy, have one, know one or suspect you might be turning into one, this book will act as your guide. But be aware that though this book might think it knows it all, it doesn't, only Mammy knows it all.

    It rejoices in men and women made of the Wrong Stuff: writers who believed in the power of words, but could never quite find the rights ones; artists and performers who indulged their creative impulse with a passion, if not a sense of the ridiculous, an eye for perspective or the ability to hold down a tune; scientists and businessmen who never quite managed to quit while they were ahead; and sportsmen who seemed to manage always to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. Like Walter Oudney, one of three men chosen to find the source of the River Niger in Africa, who could not ride a horse, nor speak any foreign languages and who had never travelled more than 30 miles beyond his native Edinburgh; or the explorer-priest Michel Alexandre de Baize, who set off to explore the African continent from east to west equipped with 24 umbrellas, some fireworks, two suits of armor, and a portable organ; or the Scottish army which decided to invade England in 1349 - during the Black Death. Entries include: briefest career in dentistry; least successful bonding exercise; most futile attempt to find a lost tribe; most pointless lines of research by someone who should have known better; least successful celebrity endorsement; least convincing excuse for a war; worst poetic tribute to a root vegetable; least successful display of impartiality by a juror; Devon Loch - sporting metaphor for blowing un unblowable lead; least dignified exit from office by a French president; and least successful expedition by camel.

     And when his childhood buddy Vinnie bails him out of jail, he agrees to partake in a scam Vinnie has put together that will make them all rich. The only problem is: while out fishing one day Johnnie reels in the biggest catch of his life... Vinnie's head on the end of the fishing line. Now mafia types, bounty hunters, and Vinnie's girlfriend are after him, and Johnnie LoDuco doesn't have a clue as to why. Plus, they all seem to want Vinnie's head, but Johnnie seems to have misplaced it in an ice cooler--and if he wants to live he needs to get it back.

    This charmingly funny, self-deprecating resumé of an ordinary man’s career to date and current life in the celebrity bear pit is penned by the author of the Sunday Times-bestselling Where Did It All Go Right?

    In "Oh Boy, You're Having a Girl," Brian, a father of three girls, shares his tactics for surviving this new and glittery world. From baby dolls and bedtime rituals to potty training and dance recitals, he leads you through all the trials and tribulations you'll face as you're raising your daughter. He'll also show you how to navigate your way through tough situations, like making sure that she doesn't start dating until she's fifty.Complete with commandments for restroom trips and properly participating in a tea party, "Oh Boy, You're Having a Girl" will brace you for all those hours playing house--and psych you up for the awesomeness of raising a daughter who has you lovingly wrapped around her little finger.

    I’m young and I want to move on. Am I a bad person?• Why does my boyfriend always adjust himself in public?• My wife dresses like a slut. How do I make her stop?• My boyfriend’s number one friend on MySpace is his ex. Should I be concerned?With he-said, she-said advice that is both raw and honest, What Do We Do Now? is sure to appeal to the podcast’s legion of fans, and attract a brand-new audience tired of the tried-and-not-so-true relationship manuals.

    Now imagine expressing that dream artistically. With Digital Expressions you can take ordinary photos and, with the help of Adobe Photoshop Elements, voice your flights of fancy. Digital Expressions guides you through 25 digital art projects created with Adobe Photoshop Elements. With this easy-to-follow guide, you'll get inspired to tackle all kinds of digital mixed-media techniques using stock photography, custom brushes, textured backgrounds and your own digital photos. Use your digital palette to:· Manipulate single images by adding texture layers, color fills and text· Re-create the look of traditional art like drawings and abstract paintings· Build collages using transparent layers and photo filters· Blend seamless montages with various effects · Incorporate your own traditional art into digital worksMixed-media artists, art journalers and scrapbookers alike can turn the ordinary into extraordinary! Express yourself in digital form as you learn to master creative digital art techniques. **Bonus CD includes assorted brushes, photos and textures you can use to create on your own digital canvas.** PLEASE NOTE that one of the images was left off of the CD by mistake. You can download it from the "Books" section of the author's website at ilkasattic.com**

    After ten years of marriage, Andy and Meg have just bought their dream house and are expecting their first child. But the picture-perfect bliss is shattered when, nine weeks away from the birth, Andy walks away from it all.

    And when the feisty royal accuses George of kidnapping her, his very ordinary life is turned completely upside down, as the party princess takes root in his apartment, causes royal waves among his friends and family, and demands to go walkabout on the streets of London.It’s blue-blooded comedy by unofficial royal appointment in this hilarious, and often surreal, regal romp that's packed with majestic mystery, aristocratic intrigue and Great British humour. Guaranteed to raise a laugh from Balmoral to Buckingham Palace!This very British comedy novel is the first in a series starring reluctant hero George Nearly, the unpredictable Princess Araminta of Essex (‘Minty’ to her friends) and a host of other quirky characters – all of whom make Mad King George seem like a perfectly sane individual. Royals and commoners collide with comical consequences in these uniquely English adventures that will bring a smile to the faces of even the grumpiest gargoyles at Windsor Castle.

    Forget about Letterman's Top Ten, Amy Krouse Rosenthal's random ponderings on quirky topics are refreshingly clever and zany. Her humor is of the great everyday observational type that everyone can relate to.

    She has an astonishing talent for visualizing relationships, capturing in pictures what is difficult for most of us to express in words. At indexed.blogspot.com, she posts charts, graphs, and Venn diagrams drawn on index cards that reveal in a simple and intuitive way the large and small truths of modern life. Praised throughout the blogosphere as “brilliant,” “incredibly creative,” and “comic genius,” Jessica turns her incisive, deadpan sense of humor on everything from office politics to relationships to religion. With new material along with some of Jessica’s greatest hits, this utterly unique book will thrill readers who demand humor that makes them both laugh and think.

     Homeowners and renters of all means dream of having a beautiful home. The media makes it look so easy, but many of us have less to work with and still long to live in style. Affordable Interior Design makes luxury an affordable reality. In this DIY home decorating handbook, Helmuth reveals insider tips and her tried-and-tested methods for choosing colors, creating a gallery wall, how to use accent tables, entry benches, rugs, and more! Helmuth has shared her affordable design advice and step-by-step approaches with millions through live teaching workshops, guest columns, television appearances, and interviews. Now, she has distilled her expertise into this practical guide. The chapters follow her secret design formula and include creating a design budget, mapping out floor plans, selecting a color palette, and accessorizing like a stylist. It’s time to start living in the home of your dreams without maxing out your credit cards. Learn how with Affordable Interior Design!

    Newly addicted to watching Sister North, a nun with a popular television show, Sam embarks on a trip to Lake Eagleton, Wisconsin, to see the nun personally, seeking forgiveness and spiritual guidance. In Lake Eagleton, he finds out much more about Sister North, himself, and falling in love than he ever expected. "Sister North" is a novel of forgiveness and hope that takes a poignant and humorous look at what passes for love and faith in the twenty-first century.

    The team behind the inspirational design sites Gardenista.com and Remodelista.com presents an all-in-one manual for making your outdoor space as welcoming as your living room. Tour personality-filled gardens around the world and re-create the looks with no-fail planting palettes. Find hundreds of design tips and easy DIYs, editors’ picks of 100 classic (and stylish) objects, a landscaping primer with tips from pros, over 200 resources, and so much more.

    Featuring 50 common North American birds, such as the White-Breasted Butt Nugget and the Goddamned Canada Goose (or White-Breasted Nuthatch and Canada Goose for the layperson), Matt Kracht identifies all the idiots in your backyard and details exactly why they suck with ink drawings. Each entry is accompanied by facts about a bird's (annoying) call, its (dumb) migratory pattern, its (downright tacky) markings, and more.The essential guide to all things wings with migratory maps, tips for birding, musings on the avian population, and the ethics of birdwatching.