Using the knowledge left by his father, the Plague Doctor, he seeks to unlock the secrets of the universe, but weakness of the flesh won’t be ignored. The sordid overtures of his nymphomaniac sister, combined with his own perverse desires, soil his subjects before revelation can be found.Now the return of Philip’s father is imminent. Judgment is at hand, and if the fate of his mother taught him anything, it’s that one mustn’t disappoint the Plague Doctor.

    An obnoxious, toothy, foul-mouthed, pig of a mouth. Luckily, his girlfriend doesn't seem to mind. Marie, the one-legged stripper and cyber-prostitute love of his life is very accepting of it. And then a little too accepting. What would you do if your girlfriend cheated on you with the voracious yapper under your belly button? If you live in Gutmouth's world-a bleak city where gruesome, spontaneous mutations are no big deal, klepto-roaches take anything not tied-down, drugs turn pain into pleasure, consumers are tortured for growing food, and your best friend is a misogynistic rat-man-you might do something crazy. And what if you got caught?

    Having survived the Ebola virus and witnessed the death of his coach in the same 365-day period, he must now withstand the taunts and insults of riders who don't understand his two all-encompassing motivations for living...... the sharing of Agape Love and the protection of bugs everywhere.

    She retouches images for Redbook, Teen Vogue, Chic, Marie Claire, and Nylon. Her work involves shaving off hipbones, masking moles, and giving more sheen to the lusterless skin of supermodels. In other words, she makes people beautiful. But when a vengeful houseguest forwards Nina's private correspondence with her boss to popular feminist blog Jezebel, Nina finds herself jobless and ostracized.Then rabid obese people start rampaging on the streets of New York.Thrown together with her ex-boyfriend Chris and his fianc�, the gorgeous Molly Sweet, Ferdinand (a male model with a fat fetish), Chantal (also a model), and Dora (the vengeful houseguest who destroyed her career), Nina must fend for her life in a world where the people she hates most are now trying to eat her.Lazy Fascist Press is proud to present The Obese, a bloody satire about body image and America's obesity epidemic, written by Shirley Jackson Award-winner Nick Antosca.Also featuring the bonus story "Predator Bait."

    Burroughs on crack!" - Thomas F. Monteleone, New York Times bestselling authorThe bacon storm is rolling in. We hear the grease and sugar beat against the roof and windows. The doughnut people are attacking. We press close together, forgetting for a moment that we hate each other. In Die You Doughnut Bastards, amputees, lonely young people, and talking animals struggle for survival against the freakish whims of nature. A typewriter made of fetuses is the source of woe for an expecting couple. A girl with a glass jaw hides an otherworldly secret. A demonic loner goes to a birthday party in Hell. You'll encounter a killer in a marsupial mask, a prison for anorexics, haunted pancakes, and a songwriter with a cult following.Surreal prose poems give way to personal accounts of alienation and modern love. Vegetarian narwhals are sold at the supermarket. And in a city that might be your own, zombie doughnuts are rising up. Kill yourself before they kill you. Or just kill yourself.Featuring original illustrations in the style of Daniel Johnston, Die You Doughnut Bastards is the latest way to drown, brought to you by Wonderland Book Award-winning author Cameron Pierce.

    Unfortunately, due to an exercise allergy, and an eating obsession, it isn’t going to be as easy as he first thought. Throw in a battle of wits with his neighbour’s cat over toilet rights to his garden, a son who lives in the shed and dreams of being discovered on The X Factor, a stroppy teenage daughter with a Wayne Rooney fixation, a wife who doesn’t want to sleep with him anymore, and an amorous work colleague who does, and you have all the ingredients to Sex, Lies and Chocolate Cakes: The Secret Eater’s Diary.

    The following list is a compilation of suggested actions you can execute to ruin your life. This is not a guarantee for complete destruction of your current social status, family affairs, and or friendships. Reader discretion is advised.1. Live your life exactly how you want.2. Disregard any advice or concern from family or friends.3. Move far away from everyone you know.4. Meet a mysterious stranger and let them into your home.5. Chase after the stranger and enter a microcosm of your own making.6. Revisit all the people you have wronged.And remember: This book is not about you.

    But what if one man decided to use a social network for one of the most idiotic causes in human history? Join the hopeless and brain damaged Andy Boring in his quest to FILL THE GRAND CANYON AND LIVE FOREVER!!!!

    He's lost everything - his wife, his dreams, his future. He finally enters the death chamber at the famous 'Walls' prison in Texas. He's strapped to a gurney and given an injection of lethal drugs in front of witnesses. Minutes later he's pronounced dead. But that's not the end of it. After the execution comes the shocking revelation - Jordan is still alive. And to stop him talking he has to die all over again - before he brings down the entire American justice system.

    From the pages of the best-selling Duck & Cover Adventures comes thirteen stories of those who survived the apocalypse. Some would go on to be heroes, others villains, some were dogs and will stay dogs, but they all must contend with the horrors of the new world and find a way to survive in the wasteland that was America. HOW TO HOST AN INTERVENTION Long before he was a knight in the apocalypse, Tommy was preparing for the end of the world. His friends grew concerned for his well-being and planned to intervene. It wasn’t so much that he was preparing, it was what he was preparing for. GONE TO THE DOGS Fidget and Sasquatch were loyal companions to the end. Now that the end has arrived, they must say goodbye to the only home they’ve ever known. If they can figure out how to open the door. BUNKED UP They took refuge in a homemade bomb shelter when the end of the world began. There they were safe from the bombs and the fallout. But they were never safe from each other. PACK HUNTERS Fidget and Sasquatch are on their own, a situation neither of them are really comfortable with. They decide to join a pack for safety, for food and for friends. Now all they have to do is find one. ANIMAL’S CALLING Before the world ended, Jackson drifted from job to job, never settling on anything that could be called a career path. But with the new world comes new opportunities. This is what he was born to do. LAST BAND OF THE APOCALYPSE Caught between county fair gigs during the apocalypse, the members of a cover band find themselves the last band left in the world. Getting gigs should be easy. Should be. PRISONER’S DILEMMA The Librarian has seen his fair share of “wasteland justice.” Now he’s chained to the floor of a grocery store with a man he must face in court. In a battle to the death. Naturally. ALPHA DOG Sergeant Satan was genetically enhanced to be the world’s best military scout. He was designed to be smarter, faster and more than a match for any dog this side of the apocalypse. Of course, his creators had never met Fidget. THE TRIAL OF HARMEGGEDON They’ve got a new name. They’ve got a new act. And they are ready to rock your face off. Now all the last band in the world needs is a gig. WILLIE AND COY RIDE AGAIN Willie and Coy aren’t the brightest. Or the best looking. Or very likeable. No one would ever accuse them of being hard workers. But the pair have found a way to make an honest living in the apocalypse. If they can get enough people to watch. IN A PERSON PACK Tired of looking for a pack to join, Sasquatch and Fidget reminisce about the joys and delights of life in a people pack. NO QUARTER Deep in the swamp of New Orleans awaits a terror many refuse to believe exists. It’s a monster of myth and rumor so horrible that it could not possibly be real. On the trail of a kidnapped woman, The Librarian must seek out and confront this monster of myth. EVE OF THE APOCALYPSE Man is the true monster. Unless there is a man who is a monster that also makes monsters. Then he’s the truest monster and only a post-apocalyptic nomadic warrior can bring this monster’s monster-making to an end.

    From torture chambers in Iraq to race riots in the United States, the Whargoul was there - killing and raping. It is a beast born in bullets and shrapnel, feeding off of pain, misery, and hard drugs. Cursed to wander the Earth without the hope of death, it is reborn again and again to spread the gospel of hate, abuse, and genocide. But what if it's not the only monster out there? What if there's something worse? From Dave Brockie, the twisted genius behind GWAR, comes a novel about the darkest days of the twentieth century. The modern world is dying and Brockie is here to put a bullet between its eyes and violate the corpse. This is all-out fucking war!

    It is made from flesh and bone. It eats and breathes and poops. It was once a billionaire named Darren Oscarson who underwent years of cosmetic surgery to be transformed into a human exercise bike so that he could live out his deepest sexual fantasy. Now Tori is forced to ride him, use him as a normal piece of exercise equipment, no matter how grotesque his appearance. Set in a health food dystopia, "Exerice Bike" is an absurd horror tale of domination and submission, power and obedience, desire and desperation, from Wonderland Book Award winner Carlton Mellick III.

    Mykle Hansen's subversive tales capture the smugness of mainstream culture. He thrusts his characters into absurd and humorous situations that reveal the defects in the modern social fabric. With the wit of Christopher Moore, the inventiveness of Ter... Full description

    A deft, masterful mix of both bizarro and horror."--Brian Keene, author of The Rising and Ghoul"Dark and grim and surreal." --Electric LiteratureMondays suck. You get mugged, your car won't start, you miss the bus, and your stylist burns a bald spot into your head. Suddenly you're single and unemployed, and the only friend you have left is a cat. By Tuesday, you've been murdered. But death isn't the end. You find yourself on an odyssey between weird worlds, reborn each time you die, stalked obsessively by the man who killed you.Even in death, you just can't seem to catch a break. Call it Mercury in retrograde, call it Murphy's law, call it . . .SHIT LUCK

    Something has happened. It's about your country and mine. It's serious-believe me. Come!" Ed Diamond, investigative reporter for "Focus," America's preeminent TV news show, is summoned urgently to Israel by an old friend, Dov Ben-Ami, formerly a top official of Israel's Mossad. But before they can meet, a terrorist bomb blows Dov apart. Determined to discover why the Israeli was killed, Diamond embarks on the most astonishing investigation he's ever undertaken. From the Dead Sea to the Old City of Jerusalem, to Tel Aviv and Paris, Washington and New York, he attempts to unravels an on-going mystery that began with the nefarious links between America's greatest corporations and Hitler's Third Reich. In the end, Ed attempts to thwart a deadly terrorist attack on Manhattan. He's pitted against one of the U.S.'s most powerful families, and a fanatical group of right-wing Israelis, ready to kill to protect a World War II intelligence coup that is still Israel's most potent weapon and most closely guarded secret, "The Watchman's File.