Afterward, the doctor comes out with the results."I'm afraid I have some very bad news," the doctor says. "You're dying, and you don't have much time left.""Oh, that's terrible!" says the man. "Give it to me straight, Doc. How long have I got?""Ten," the doctor says sadly."Ten?" the man asks. "Ten what? Months? Weeks? What?!""Nine..."

    Clever and funny cartoons makes learning new words fun and entertaining.

    FICTION: Poolside at their motel, the Fab Four fell into conversation with a snappy-dressing local named Bert the Shirt, who listened as the band worked out a harmony to the most beautiful song he’d ever heard--and wouldn’t hear again for over half a century. FACT: That night, the Beatles played an unannounced free concert in the motel bar. Everyone was welcome. Local musicians showed up with guitars and keyboards, and had the once-in-a-lifetime experience of jamming with the Beatles till 4 am. This legendary event has forever after been known to Key West locals as THE PARADISE GIG.FICTION: Next day, hung over and exhausted, the Beatles left for the airport, having somehow lost a stained and battered notebook that held a priceless stash of unrecorded songs. NOW CUT TO THE PRESENT: A beautiful woman is doing a yoga headstand on a Key West beach when she’s abducted by a pair of thugs. An aspiring young singer is offered a recording deal that seems a bit too good to be true. Bad things happen to a couple of one-hit wonders…And old Bert hears a new song that is hauntingly familiar, but that he can’t quite place.Could it possibly be the same song he’d heard at poolside so many years before? Could it be that all the present mayhem circles back through the decades to THE PARADISE GIG? Could the precious, even sacred, Beatles notebook possibly turn up after all these years? Could Bert be the hero who would rediscover that stash of unheard songs for music lovers everywhere—and save a young singer’s life in the process? With Nacho, his intrepid Chihuahua, at his side, and with no one but bumbling detective Pete Amsterdam for an ally, the undaunted Bert the Shirt sets out through the Florida haze to piece it all together, learning along the way how much the world has changed—and how much it has not. In equal parts suspenseful and nostalgic, funny and romantic, this time-bending caper celebrates the power of music and the many tricks of memory, the joys of youth and the comforts of age, and the free and funky spirit of Key West.

    Fresh. Hilarious. Since we love laughing at funny jokes and pictures, we decided to create a series of books showcasing hilarious jokes we find throughout the day from all over the internet. We’ve even found some jokes in that old crusty sock you keep under your bed… Book is not appropriate for young kids. May have adult language or adult themes. Reader discretion is advised HAVE FUN! And let us know what you liked and where we can improve by leaving a review!

    Yes, it is really that good.""This is going to be my 'go to book' when I've had a bad day!"Please Note: Some profanity, not for children!

     So waste no more time, scroll up this page and order the the ebook right now.

    I’m the ditzy one that gives blondes a bad name’. Cappuccino and Chick-Chat is a riotous read about Debbie Viggiano’s candid observations in her often-chaotic world. Whether it’s losing her car, attempting cosmic ordering, freaking herself out manifesting a can of cola, or buying sweaters in shades that flatter her frequently flushed face, Debbie takes her reader on a madcap journey while trying to see the lighter side of life. It’s the perfect bedtime read. What readers are saying about Debbie’s books: ‘My favourite book this year… had me literally LAUGHING OUT LOUD… This book had me laughing and crying. I loved it and recommend it for everyone!’ Being Miss Meg, 5 stars ‘Absolutely hilarious. It is so easy for any woman to relate to this book… sooooo good. I read this in just a few hours as I simply couldn’t put it down. Go and grab your copy now. It’s one everyone will be talking about this year.’ Goodreads reviewer, 5 stars ‘Wow!... Honest, heartfelt and totally hilarious! Such an amazing read, I found myself either smiling or laughing constantly... Bl**dy brilliant!! I love it!... a must read for every woman this summer.’ Goodreads reviewer, 5 stars ‘Made me smile, giggle and laugh out loud. I loved it and would recommend it to anyone.’ Goodreads reviewer, 5 stars ‘Funny from the very beginning until the end, and there were some laugh out loud moments which I loved… I was reading this at 2am!... had me giggling away. I ended up reading this in one sitting, I just couldn't put it down. Thanks for one hell of a laugh Debbie!’The Bookend Reviews, 5 stars ‘Loved this book from the very first word.’ Goodreads reviewer, 5 stars ‘My first read of Debbie Viggiano, and I can't wait to read more!... Entertaining from beginning to end.’ Goodreads reviewer, 5 stars ‘Funny from beginning to end… quite often had me nodding in recognition of some of the situations.’ A Good Book and a Brew, 5 stars ‘OMGoodness – what a treat… a chuckly book, with a light heart.’ Goodreads reviewer, 5 stars ‘This author certainly knows how to make you laugh.’ 5 stars, B for Book Review,

    Whether this is because they haven't yet mastered the 21st century phone or because they live to embarrass you throughout all forms of communication, Text Fails from Mum, is a hilarious collection of our all time favourite texts from Mum.Please stop changing the google logo so much, I like the original one.Mum I don't change the logo. Google changes it.On my computer, you don't run the Google?If I did I wouldn't be driving a 2004 Ford.Andy, I can't find my phone. Can you call it so I can try and track it down?I don't have time to be quippy, mum. It's in your hand.What? No it's not. I've got a bag of groceries in my hand. Are you saying it's in the grocery bag? How do you know these things!?WHAT ARE YOU TEXTING ME WITH!?Never mind! I found it! Thanks!This humour gift book is the laugh out loud answer to the annual conundrum what should I get Mum for Christmas, Mother's Day and her Birthday? Text Fails From Mum is the perfect stocking filler, and a gift all the family can relate to and enjoy.

    

    The only witness is disabled vet Adam Lee—wounded in a Special Forces mission to Cuba to destroy Fidel Castro's secret Brilliant academy. Though wheelchair-bound and trapped in his seventh-story apartment, Adam Lee has a special skill, his ability as a Brilliant, that allows him to use hints and reflections to see around corners and through the smallest cracks. If he pushes his ability, he may be able to identify the murderer...but that also makes him a target.

    Traver recounts the story of a mysterious "dancing fly, " speaks pointedly about "kiss-and-tell" fishermen, debunks fly fishermen as the "world's greatest snobs, " lets us in on the fishing story Life missed, and takes us along on his strangest fishing trip. We meet the unforgettable Danny McGinnis, guide, and other choice characters and events from his anything-but-ordinary fishing trips. Traver even has some new angles on women anglers and does a free piece of tongue-in-cheek literary sleuthing into Ernest Hemingway's story "Big Two-Hearted River."There's enough trout magic here to rub off on every reader -- man, woman, or child -- as Robert Traver weaves his inimitable storytelling spell. Trout Magic is a marvelous catch of wit, wisdom, and anecdote sure to delight everyone who enjoys a master storyteller who just happens to write here about his wonderful world of trout fishing.

    For Russell, the only thing worse than failing to reach sanctuary is the failure to protect his family in this dangerous post-EMP world.The Final StandPrepare and survive.When an EMP cripples the nation's power grid, lawlessness erupts across the country. Fighting against the chaos, Detective Mike Thorton must rescue his family from the city and bring them to his sister's cabin in the mountains.

    intelligence agencies wracked by internal power struggles and paralyzed by bureaucracy, the president has been forced to establish his own clandestine group--Covert-One. It's activated only as a last resort, when the threat is on a global scale and time is running out.THE UTOPIA EXPERIMENTWhen Dresner Industries unveils the Merge, a device that is destined to revolutionize the world and make the personal computer and smartphone obsolete, Covert-One operative Colonel Jon Smith is assigned to assess its military potential. He discovers that enhanced vision, real-time battlefield displays, unbreakable security, and near-perfect marksmanship are only the beginning of a technology that will change the face of warfare forever--and one that must be kept out of the hands of America's enemies at all costs.Meanwhile, in the mountains of Afghanistan, CIA operative Randi Russell encounters an entire village of murdered Afghans--all equipped with enhanced Merge technology that even the Agency didn't know existed. As Smith and Russell delve into the circumstances surrounding the Afghans' deaths, they're quickly blocked by someone who seems to have access to the highest levels of the military--a person that even the president knows nothing about.Is the Merge really as secure as its creator claims? And what secrets about its development is the Pentagon so desperate to hide? Smith and Russell are determined to learn the truth. But they may pay for it with their lives . . .

    Laughing also gives us long term effects as well, it improves our immune system, relieves pain, increase personal satisfaction and improves our mood. Laughter is really a great medicine, and most of the time it is free. You may just have a funny conversation with your family or friends, watch a funny movie or sitcom, or just ready funny books. Remember, in life the best ornament is humility; the richest wealth is wisdom; the strongest weapon is patience; the best security is faith; the best mental tonic is laughter. Live well, laugh often, love much and share God's blessings. Read our collection of jokes and funny short stories. These jokes and funny stories are collected from different sources in the Internet. Download our book now, and laugh out those stress away. Please note that this book is categorized under Jokes for Adults and may contain some offensive jokes and stories, and it is your discretion as a customer whether to share the jokes and stories with others.