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Harold Patter and the Worst Child: A Parody of Harry Potter and the Cursed Child by John Marquane
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Just Desserts
Sue Welfare - 1995
Every time she chops up her delicious home-grown tomatoes she dreams of murdering her husband. Why can’t Harry just have an affair with a younger woman, and leave?Trouble is Harry has no intention of giving up his home comforts. Not when he’s been having his cake and eating it for years. Glamorous banker Carol accompanies him on business trips and the odd weekend away, but she too is beginning to think maybe life with Harry is growing stale.So who’s fooling who? Harry, happy in his illusion that he’s a sex god and all his women love him? Katherine and Carol, unlikely partners in Harry’s parallel lives? Against a background of gleeful coincidences, cute Cambridge cafes and the unexpected joys of unexplored freedom, the women decide that revenge is a dish best eaten cold.First published in 1999, Just Desserts takes us back to an era of shoulder pads and fax machines, and proves that when it comes to love and betrayal some stories are timeless.Pro
Monitor
Leigh Alexander - 2016
After they recover an NBN executive’s PAD at a protest in Broadcast Square, it seems Lana Rael and her friends, Johnny and Tim, might finally have their chance to discover the truth behind NBN’s saccharine and explosively popular franchise, Sunshine Junction.But when the aspiring activists stumble into the corporation’s all seeing eye, they find themselves in the limelight—and not in the way they hoped.As camdrones begin to follow them through the megacity and broadcast their every move on live threedee, Lana and her friends will have to ask themselves just how much they’re willing to sacrifice to fight the corps. Is making a difference worth risking their privacy, their lifestyle, or their lives?Fans of media giant NBN, its colorful programs, and its high-profile characters gain unparalleled access to the megacorp's HQ in Leigh Alexander's Monitor. As the media-focused megacorp responds to the threat posed by a trio of wannabe activists, we learn more about such popular characters as Jackson Howard, Victoria Jenkins, and Dinosaurus.Meanwhile, as the protagonists have their privacy stripped away, they lose control of their lives. Their actions become increasingly desperate and surprising. As they look for ways to retaliate, will their lives spiral into total anarchy? Will they regain control of the context that defines them? And who is responsible for their suffering? In Monitor, the truth is malleable, and learning how to shape it is paramount.In addition to its 96 pages of fiction, the hardcover edition of Monitor comes with a sixteen-page full color insert with setting information on activism in the Android future, NBN's Global Adaptive Entertainment, MegaBuy, and the future of marketing.
Finding Eden
Tina Newcomb - 2017
As mayor of Eden Falls, a business owner, and the mother of six-year-old Charlie, she doesn’t have time to coddle a self-absorbed author, who’s only in town for the summer.Best-selling author Colton McCreed is in Eden Falls to study small town life for his next murder mystery. As his research draws him into the community, he becomes entwined with the mayor and her cheerful son. Colton’s unhappy childhood left him believing he’s immune to love, but Alex and Charlie have a pull on him he’s never felt before.Impromptu dinner invitations throw Colton and Alex into a world of discovery, shattering her image of Mr. Right and his belief that love is out of reach.If you like clean romance, quirky characters, and a quaint town you won’t want to leave, you'll love Finding Eden.Other Books in the Eden Falls SeriesBeyond EdenA Taste of EdenThe Angel of Eden FallsTouches of EdenStars Over Eden FallsFortunes for EdenSnow and Mistletoe in Eden Falls
Up to No Good
Marsha Cornelius - 2016
Because she and her husband, Brian, work together, they have little to talk about. And the heat between the sheets has definitely cooled. Her only diversion these days seems to be the usual neighborhood gossip. She likes to think she's inquisitive. Brian says she's a snoop.Lately, her nosy nature has escalated. She's gotten it into her head that a house down the road might be used to make adult films. Her clues? The blinds are always drawn, and there are never any garbage cans at the curb. She’s determined to get to the bottom of the mystery, but if her snooping keeps uncovering unexpected dirt, it may very well be the last thing she ever does.
We Need To Talk About Ross: A True History Of The Ocarroll Kelly Gang
Ross O'Carroll-Kelly - 2009
Lover. Bon viviant. Cad. Ross O'Carroll-Kelly is many things to many people. But 10 years after he lifted the Leinster Schools Senior Cup, Ireland's most beloved rogue remains one of its most misunderstood figures.
BAD INTENT
Michael Tabman - 2013
Douglas and his partner NYPD Detective Mark Zucarelli on the streets of New York City as they find themselves in the middle of raging drug wars.The Colombian Cartels are flooding the streets with cocaine. They are violent and ruthless criminals.The Mob has been cut out. What will they do?The FBI and the NYPD have an uneasy alliance.Who can be trusted?Does everyone have bad intent?Inspired by my years on the FBI-NYPD Drug Task Force, BAD INTENT will take you to the dark side of the drug wars.Peek into the hearts and minds of the FBI Agents and NYPD Detectives on the front lines.Do you have BAD INTENT?
A Daughter’s Return
Josephine Cox - 2021
When she moves to Guisethorpe on the east coast of England, the townsfolk are intrigued by the glamorous and mysterious stranger, with her flame-red hair and abrupt manners.Florence doesn’t care about the gossips – she’s drawn to the peaceful seaside town by the pull of her childhood, when she lived for a brief but happy time with her beloved late mother. The riddle of those days remains and now Florence can only snatch at half-remembered memories and shadowy figures in her dreams.As Florence is reluctantly drawn into the lives of her new neighbours, the layers of her own life are revealed, though it’s clear not everyone wishes her well. Far from finding peace, Florence has found instead turmoil and secrets. Can she put the pieces of her past together, or will it remain a closed book forever…?
This Is This Country: The official book of the BAFTA award-winning show
Kerry Mucklowe - 2019
All the best,Kerry and Kurtanp.s. Kurtan wants to make it clear that although this newsletter is in book format it does not make him any of the following:Book WormBook bummerBoffinNerd alertThe lion, the witch and the book wormp.p.s If you don't buy this newsletter that's fine, but we are getting a percent of the profits to donate to the Kerry Mucklowe eating fund, so if you don't buy it I'll basically starve. Which is fine if your conscience can deal with that utter headf***.
Once Again: Sullivan's Woman / Less of a Stranger
Nora Roberts - 1984
John is fired from yet another job, she hardly expected the solution to her problems to come from a complete stranger. He loomed out of the fog like some mythic figure, but Cassidy soon discovers Colin Sullivan is flesh and blood and all man. When Colin offers her a job modeling for one of his paintings, it seems her troubles are over—but one look at his blue eyes and Cassidy finds they are only beginning…Less of a StrangerMegan Miller’s grandfather is the only family she has left. So when Pops asks her for help running his amusement park, she doesn’t think twice about putting her own artistic ambitions on hold. When confident and colossally arrogant David Katcherton sweeps in trying to buy the park, Megan fights back. Yet Katch knows all the right—and wrong—buttons to push with Megan. As Katch challenges her to fulfill her dreams, he also arouses passions she never knew before…
My Lady's Choosing: An Interactive Romance Novel
Kitty Curran - 2018
Will you flip forward fetchingly to find love with the bantering baronet Sir Benedict Granville? Or turn the page to true love with the hardworking, horse-loving highlander Captain Angus McTaggart? Or perhaps race through the chapters chasing a good (and arousing) man gone mad, bad, and scandalous to know, Lord Garraway Craven? Or read on recklessly and take to the Continent as the “traveling companion” of the spirited and adventuresome Lady Evangeline? Or yet some other intriguing fate? Make choices, turn pages, and discover all the daring delights of the multiple (and intertwining!) storylines. And in every path you pick, beguiling illustrations bring all the lust and love to life.
The Menu
Steven Manchester - 2020
With heaven’s memories erased, his romantic quest teaches him that the heart often sees clearer than the eyes—and that not everyone has ordered the same items from The Menu. Evidence that love stories come in many different forms, The Menu is a spiritual journey involving more than just a man and a woman; it is a modern-day tale that reaches far beyond the boundaries of reason.
Where There's A Will
Matt Beaumont - 2006
He works with dysfunctional teenagers, and where everyone else sees apprentice career criminals, he sees hope. No-one has ever taught him to accentuate the positive; his mind is simply built that way. He adores his family: Karen and the children are the centre of his world. So when he finds that one of his few teenage success stories has wound up working in a massage parlour, he knows he has to help. He’ll pop in for a little chat – thats all it will be. But try telling that to anyone else. Karen’s not convinced, and maybe she has her reasons to be suspicious. Alvin finds that one mistake, arising from the noblest of motives, will propel events out of control. Now cast adrift, Alvin’s only allies are the teenagers everyone’s given up on. They’re great at supplying dodgy DVDs and ringtones – but can they help him get his life back?
Hermione Granger's Unofficial Life Lessons and Words of Wisdom: What Would Hermione (from the Harry Potter Series) Say?
Euphemia Pinkerton Noble - 2018
Hermione is, without a doubt, the brightest witch of her age, which is why she is looked up to by so many people. In this AHAbook, she shares with us tips and tricks to studying and how one can greatly increase their efficiency in education. As a Gryffindor, Hermione talks about bravery and courage and teaches us why we are bigger than our fears and greater than any obstacle. She speaks about the beauty of friendship and the value of family. Hermione tells us about how one’s journey through life can possibly go and how to best handle things that come our way. She definitely believes that dreams can come true if you just believe in yourself. Hermione Granger's Unofficial Life Lessons and Words of Wisdom is part of the AHAthat/THiNKaha series of books. AHAthat helps experts and thought leaders share their genius. The bite-sized morsels of wisdom within these physical and online books are easy to consume and share.
Betty & Veronica Summer Fun
Frank Doyle - 2003
Blondes, brunettes, beach balls and bikinis- now you can cherish the innocence of summer days gone by with this paperback edition collecting the earliest stories from the hard-to-find BETTY & VERONICA SUMMER FUN editions of the ARCHIE GIANT SERIES! Whether chasing after hunky new lifeguards, modeling the latest swimwear or putting up with Archie and Reggie's goofy rivalry for their affections, Betty and Veronica are truly the queens of summer!
America Again: Re-becoming the Greatness We Never Weren't
Stephen Colbert - 2012
You could say we're the #1 nation at being the best at greatness.But as perfect as America is in every single way, America is broken! And we can't exchange it because we're 236 years past the 30-day return window. Look around--we don't make anything anymore, we've mortgaged our future to China, and the Apologist-in-Chief goes on world tours just to bow before foreign leaders. Worse, the L.A. Four Seasons Hotel doesn't even have a dedicated phone button for the Spa. You have to dial an extension! Where did we lose our way?!It's high time we restored America to the greatness it never lost!Luckily, AMERICA AGAIN will singlebookedly pull this country back from the brink. It features everything from chapters, to page numbers, to fonts. Covering subject's ranging from healthcare ("I shudder to think where we'd be without the wide variety of prescription drugs to treat our maladies, such as think-shuddering") to the economy ("Life is giving us lemons, and we're shipping them to the Chinese to make our lemon-flavored leadonade") to food ("Feel free to deep fry this book—it's a rich source of fiber"), Stephen gives America the dose of truth it needs to get back on track.