Like the bungling burglar who logged on to his own Facebook page at his victim's house - and forgot to turn the computer off when he left, or the stupid bank robber who made his escape in his own car - complete with personalised number plates, or the idiotic criminal who tried to hand himself into the police... in order to collect the reward. Award-winning writer Andrew Penman has scoured the country for this hilarious collection of those who are not just bad, but also dim very dim. 'Andrew Penman enjoys a laugh at the expense of Britain's most stupid burglars' - The Mirror 'Exploits so dim-witted it's surprising they ever managed to keep themselves breathing long enough to commit any crime' - Wales Online Illustrated with cartoons drawn by Neil Kerber.

    This file contains Part One of the book only, which is 20,000 words.In RESURRECTED (Book #1 of the Vampire Legacy), 16 year old Scarlet Paine finds herself changing in mysterious ways. She is becoming sensitive to light, able to read peoples’ thoughts, and is faster and stronger than she’s ever been. She doesn’t understand what’s happening to her, and tries to ignore it. But she can only dismiss it for so long.Caitlin Paine, her mom, knows too well what’s happening to her daughter. She underwent the same transformation to vampire once, centuries ago. But now, in the present day, as a mere human, she has no memory of it. All she has is the journal she found in the attic—her mysterious vampire journal—telling of her exploits in another time and place, and of the vampire race being eradicated. But was there one exception to the rule? Could it be that Scarlet, her daughter, is the last remaining vampire on earth?As Scarlet tries to fight who she’s becoming, she also tries to fight her intense feelings for Blake, a boy in her grade who she has a crush on. She can’t tell, though, if he’s into her, and with the big Halloween dance just days away, the pressure is on. She would do anything for Blake to ask her. But Vivian, the meanest of the popular girls, is also on Blake’s radar, and she’ll do anything to make Blake hers—and to make Scarlet’s life a living hell.Luckily Scarlet has her own clique of friends to back her up, including her best friends Maria and Jasmin. They, too, have guy troubles—but it isn’t until Sage appears, the mysterious new boy, that her friends become obsessed. Scarlet finds herself attracted to him, too—and is surprised when it is her, of all the girls in the school, that he pays attention to. But her mind is set on Blake, at least for now, and she continues to hope he’ll ask her to the dance.Just when it seems that Scarlet has what she wants, her body changes. Soon it may be impossible for her to be near her fellow humans. Soon, she may have to choose between her desire to live and her desire for love.Book #2 in the series, CRAVED (Book #2 of the Vampire Legacy), is now also available.“Grabbed my attention from the beginning and did not let go….This story is an amazing adventure that is fast paced and action packed from the very beginning. There is not a dull moment to be found.”--Paranormal Romance Guild {regarding Turned}“A great plot, and this especially was the kind of book you will have trouble putting down at night. The ending was a cliffhanger that was so spectacular that you will immediately want to buy the next book, just to see what happens.”--The Dallas Examiner {regarding Loved}“Morgan Rice proves herself again to be an extremely talented storyteller….This would appeal to a wide range of audiences, including younger fans of the vampire/fantasy genre. It ended with an unexpected cliffhanger that leaves you shocked.”--The Romance Reviews {regarding Loved}Morgan Rice is the #1 Bestselling author of THE VAMPIRE JOURNALS, an eight-book series which has sold over 100,000 copies and has been translated into six languages. Morgan is also author of ARENA ONE, the first book in a dystopian, post-apocalyptic action-thriller trilogy.

    A Long Distance Relationship Story in the backdrop of an engineering college.Few Details:1) PROXY: Filled for five friends but forgot one's own2) VIVA: Smoked and drunk but still cracked it3) Group Discussion: Topic- 'Woman on the Top'4) DROPOUT: Still invited as a motivational speaker at his collegePLOT:Neil met Avani-the girl who saved him from committing suicide few years back.Soon they were connected through Facebook.On day one, she revealed her plan to leave India for higher studies.But still their conversation continued.He told her about his college life while she talked about her friends.One day, he surprised her by dropping to her place and professing his love.What will Avani do now?

    

    He’s also a vampire. He lives alone and avoids the other vampires in L.A., but Pete’s simple life goes haywire when he falls for Angie, the cute bartender at a Sunset Strip dive -- and when sinister vampire lord Carson Fitzgerald returns to claim his children, Pete learns that nothing's ever easy for a creature of the night.

    With my arrival to Scotland and my coronation right around the corner, I’d never been more nervous than I am now. Known for having enemies, I didn’t realize becoming Queen would garner even more. I’m not the only one after the throne and the battle for the crown might cost me my life. The Summits on one side and the Council on the other, it’s a fight to stay on top and protect the lunas from a man’s world. But I’ve never been one to back down, especially when it comes to the lunas. The Summits and Council are in for a rude awakening when I shake things up and turn their worlds upside down. On top of all that, there’s an evil lurking in the forest and it’s after one thing—me. With my mating ceremony coming up, I don’t know how I’m going to survive it all. The goal is the crown, but can I keep it?

    However, she comes upon an awesome goth kid: one with white hair and green blue eyes. Will Jagger Maxwell ever reveal his secret, turn Emily, and be with her for all eternity? Book One of the Dark Vampire Knight Series.

    We all know one! They like to groan and grumble, offering their own commentary on the shortcomings of modern life. Whether it is queues at the supermarket, the state of the health system, the price of a pint these days, the hairstyles of teenagers, or the number of Maltesers you actually get in a bag, there is always something that will get their goat. 'The Grumpy Old Git's Guide to Life' is a hilarious celebration of all these grumps, how to identify one, what exactly they find so irritating and why we find their rants quite so amusing.

     Blair - Chrissy Peebles Jezebel - Kristen Middleton Victoria - W.J. May Lotus - C.J. Pinard Don't mess with the Daughters of Darkness, especially Victoria. Only Death Could Stop Her Now Victoria was a Hunter Vampire, now turned Hunted. When Evan is obviously been kidnapped by the Council, Tori will stop at nothing to get him back. At the same time, she's disappointed to learn Malcolm, her old hunting partner, is hot on her trail. Malcolm knows her very well as they worked together for countless decades. He knows her every move and her every hiding spot. She seeks Finns help. Finn has been alive for centuries and has somehow managed to stay completely off the Council's radar by living off the grid. She's confident he can keep her, Eddie, and Trent safe while they come up with a way to get to Evan. Vlad wants her - dead or alive, it seems to no longer matter. Tori will do whatever is needed to keep Evan safe, even if it means coming up against her father and hunting him.

    A cynical, wise-cracking vampire charged with protecting the Balance between vampires and humans, he is part cop, part spy, and part commando -- James Bond with fangs. Lawson mixes shrewd cunning with unmatched lethality to get his job done. He tries his best to dismantle conspiracies, dispatch bad guys, and live long enough to get home.

    It contains three novellas, two deleted scenes, mindjack flash fiction, and more. TOP 5 FINALIST for 2012 Best Indie Book, Young Adult Fiction - The Kindle Book ReviewThe Mindjack Origins Collection is comprised of THREE SHORT NOVELLAS which are companion stories to the Mindjack Saga (read after Free Souls), a young adult science fiction series. There are three novels in the original trilogy, five novellas that accompany the series, and plans for another trilogy in the works (see Susan’s latest novella, The Locksmith, for a peek at a new Mindjack character for the coming trilogy – or better yet, subscribe to her newsletter, and get The Locksmith for free!).READING ORDERMindjack Trilogy (novels): Open Minds, Closed Hearts, Free SoulsMindjack Origins (shorts): Mind Games, The Handler, The Scribe, KeeperThe Locksmith is a standalone novella that can be read independently of the trilogy and novellas.

    I watch from afar. They have so much fun, so much life in them left to live. Although I deeply yearn to be included, I know it’s best to stay back. They would never accept me, even with their good hearts. I don’t deserve to be included. I’ve done things. Things I’m not proud of. I’ve taken souls. I’ve taken fortunes. I’ve ripped away loved ones and left strong men drowning in the darkest despair. I am broken. I’m evil. So, I hide. I watch. I listen to everything…" NOTE: This is the TWELTH book of the GODS OF CHAOS MOTORCYCLE CLUB series. Each book may be read alone, but they are best read together. To find book one, search for Gods of Chaos Motorcycle Club: The Trilogy. This book is intended for adults 18 & over.

     Willum Baker, a humble boy from deep in the forest, is pulled into a war that no one even knows about. Now, he either learns to become the perfect spy, or everything, everywhere, will have never been at all. He has help from a family he never knew, but in the end, Will is on his own. Fighting to understand hundreds of alien worlds, before it’s too late. If it’s possible, which is far from assured. *Note: This story takes place in the Young Ancients, Infected, Shortcuts and Mr. Hartley universes. If you've ever wanted a really satisfying cross over that moved past the first few minutes of meetings, this series is for you!

    With a bloodthirsty AI running his advanced spaceship, those who love evil should start looking over their shoulders. Life just got a lot more fun. Vigilante, Book 1 On the planet now known as High Tortuga, the mine workers are far too close to being slaves so the ruler of the planet shut them down. Except for the mine owned by Venfirdri Lan. He's taken his mine off the grid and decided to keep everything running. With no need to pay the workers, profits should be good. After all, who's going to stop him? Sentinal, Book 2 Someone sent three fully armed ships to High Tortuga to back the slave-owners running the mines, and Barnabas and Shinigami are determined to find out who. And take them down. As they look deeper, however, they’ll find traces of an organization that controls whole mercenary syndicates, industries, and even governments: the Yennai Corporation. …Some people never learn. Warden, Book 3 Barnabas has uncovered one of the biggest players in this sector, the Yennai Corporation. Now he’s in for a surprise - it turns out that the alien who’s been pulling the strings against him is none other than Uleq, the Torcellan who escaped Bethany Anne’s clutches. Barnabas isn’t taking any chances now. He’s going to find the Yennai Corporation’s main base and bring them down. Paladin, Book 4 Barnabas has traced the influence of the Yennai Corporation from High Tortuga to their secret base, which he has destroyed, killing both heirs to the company. Who hasn’t he killed? Koel Yennai, the patriarch and founder…who has sworn vengeance on Barnabas for killing his children and destroying his legacy.Now, Koel gathers what remains of the Yennai Corporation to hunt Barnabas across known space and kill him. And Barnabas is more than ready for the confrontation. Justiciar, Book 5 After taking down the Yennai Corporation, Barnabas has earned a little break. On the way back to High Tortuga, however, he stops to answer a distress call. How long could it take, after all? Barnabas is about to find out.

    Are you happy?'After her board exams are over, Sonali – Li to her friends– meets a mysterious stranger called Omi Daan on Facebook. What begins as an idle chat soon takes over her waking hours and her dreams, as she, and through her, her friends Jo and Neel, get sucked inexorably into a world of darkness, danger and death. Who is Omi Daan?As they try to find out, their lives disintegrate and Li discovers that one cannot deal with darkness and remain untouched ...