101 foolproof jokes to use in case of emergency


Adam Kisiel - 2012
    Afterward, the doctor comes out with the results."I'm afraid I have some very bad news," the doctor says. "You're dying, and you don't have much time left.""Oh, that's terrible!" says the man. "Give it to me straight, Doc. How long have I got?""Ten," the doctor says sadly."Ten?" the man asks. "Ten what? Months? Weeks? What?!""Nine..."

Kids Don't Get Cancer: The Remarkably Inspiring Story of Michael Crossland


Michael Crossland - 2015
    This passion stems from his own story … Before Michael was even one year old, he was diagnosed with an aggressive cancer of the central nervous system – a tumour had taken over half of his tiny body. The chance of Michael surviving was virtually non-existent. He started chemotherapy at 1 year old and by his second birthday, doctors had basically given up all hope. His only hope was taking part in a drug trial program – a program of which Michael was the only participant to survive the treatment. Although he survived, he was left with some permanent scars – only one lung, a damaged heart and a sensitive immune system. Michael Crossland sets an example for all of us. He's a man who has faced (and still faces) extreme challenges in life, but he never gives up. And despite his own obstacles, he always puts others before himself and gives so much to people in need. A true inspiration. A true hero. About the Author: As one of Australia’s most sought after inspirational speakers Michael has defied the odds of a life threatening cancer to build his life of exceptional achievements. He is a regular inspirational speaker for corporations, schools, professional sporting organisations and universities throughout the world. In the last 12 months Michael has presented in front of over 250,000 people around the globe. His journey has been shared on many TV programs including Fox Sports, ABC, ChannelSeven & Nine networks, Full Potential TV, The Get Inspired Project, Inspire Me Today program and countless radio shows throughout America, Fiji and Australia. Along with his award winning program about his life on Australian Stories, Michael has also recently featured in a humanitarian documentary about the countless lives saved through his orphanage and school in Haiti that he is involved with. Diagnosed before his first birthday and spending over ¼ of his life in hospital, doctors told him school and sport were not options. Infection and fatigue were too great a risk, reaching his teenage years would be a miracle. His only wish was to lead a normal life and be able to do all the things that other kids took for granted every day. But he had a dream and the undying determination to achieve the impossible… No matter the size of the obstacles that lay ahead. Now, an accomplished businessman, National Ambassador for Camp Quality, Australian of the Year finalist, Australia Day Ambassador and international hall of fame inductee, Michael inspires people from all walks of life. It is no doubt he has a heart for giving and a skill to engage people from all walks of life. Within the last five years he has gone from being one of the youngest State Development Managers for one of the largest companies in the world, to running five banks then leaving his finance career to follow his dreams in making a global impact and he certainly has done that! Michael’s story “Field of Dreams” was documented on Australian Story, ABC TV television. Through this documentary, his message touched the hearts of a nation, with his story of how he overcame seemingly insurmountable obstacles to achieve success in both his personal and professional life.

Minus Nine to One: The Diary of an Honest Mum


Jools Oliver - 2006
    Having longed for children since before she can remember, she was suddenly faced with an array of unfamiliar, unexpected and sometimes downright embarrassing emotional and physical reactions. And when Poppy (and a year later Daisy) was born she had to learn a whole new set of skills.From trying to conceive and a first positive pregnancy test to Poppy's first birthday, Minus Nine To One takes you through the worries, surprises, excitement, miracles and sheer bloody hard work that Jools - and all new mums in their own different ways - have to cope with along the way. As Jools writes, 'This certainly isn't meant to be read as a guidebook, or a medical reference book - it is simply my story and I hope that you can relate to it in some way (and maybe even relax with it in the bath!).'Down to earth, personal and very, very funny, this is the book no aspiring mother will want to be without.

Trailer Dogs: Life in America's New Middle Class (The Trailer Dog Chronicles Book 1)


Ellen Garrison - 2016
    After losing their small business and life savings to the government’s unfathomable shutdown, the author and her husband are forced to sell their home and move into a travel trailer. Still reeling from financial loss and the deaths of two of their beloved dogs, the pair embark on a new life in a trailer park, populated with some of the most unconventional characters you’d ever hope not to meet. There’s Gretchen, the park’s unsympathetic and conniving manager, and her puny, perverted husband, Lloyd, who “maintains” the park grounds and who gives pool algae a bad name. Daisy and Lonnie May are the author’s closest neighbors, and are, perhaps, the park’s most devoted couple. Only Daisy May happens to be Lonnie’s dog. Trailer Dogs will make you laugh, cry, and maybe even a little angry. But it will never make you bored.

The United States of Australia: An Aussie Bloke Explains Australia to Americans


Cameron Jamieson - 2014
    Written for Americans, but equally amusing to anyone visiting the shores of the Great Southern Land, this book examines the relationship between Australia and the U.S., including how Australians view their American cousins. The author has plenty of experience of working and dealing with Americans. He is married to an American nurse and has lived his life within the massive cultural influence that America has shared with Australia since the Second World War. The author’s stories are brimming with empathy and jokes for his American audience. The book is written from the opinion of an Aussie Bloke and the easy-to-digest chapters are just long enough to leave the reader smiling and well informed.Topics include Blokes and Sheilas, Bloody Foster’s, Dangerous Creatures, Talking to Dogs, The GAFA, Speaking Strail-yun and Working for the Queen. Confused? You won’t be after reading this book!

Traveling with People I Want to Punch in the Throat


Jen Mann - 2021
    

Introduction to Kettlebells: A Minimalist's Guide to Blasting Fat and Boosting Muscle


Pat Flynn - 2019
    You simply move more deeply into them. For anyone - the kettlebell novice to the 15-year veteran - this short (read: just 30 page) ebook provides the perfect foundation or refresher of the fundamental kettlebell techniques, including the kettlebell swing, goblet squat, snatch, Turkish get up, clean, and military press. Each movement has detailed instructions plus step-by-step photos to help the reader understand the movements as well as safely and effectively execute them. After we discuss the hows of each of the basic movements, we move into applying what we've learned with a simple, straightforward kettlebell program for strength, muscle, mobility, conditioning, and (for those who want it) weight loss. This 7-day program can be run through just once as a refresher or for up to six weeks as a standalone program. This book includes: *The following kettlebell exercises: Kettlebell swing, goblet squat, snatch, Turkish get up, clean, and military press. *Each kettlebell exercise features a detailed description of the movement, step-by-step photos and key points. *A straightforward and simple 7-day program (repeatable for up to 6 weeks) to help the novice acclimate to kettlebell training or for the kettlebell veteran hone their technique and skills.

Center of Attention: A True Crime Memoir


Jami D. Brown Martin - 2020
    The photo looks completely out of place on the FBI Ten Most Wanted Fugitives list where it’s been since December, 8, 2007. For eight of those years, Jason appeared directly beside Osama Bin Laden. Bin Laden is long gone, but Jason is still wanted for armed robbery and murder.For years, his sister, Jami D. Brown Martin has watched the true crime programs and read the amateur investigative blogs devoted to Jason, his crime, and the efforts to apprehend him knowing the story wasn’t as simple, nor was it just Jason’s. To be the sister, brother, or relative of one of the world’s most wanted men is to live every day with the horrible truth and many consequences of his brutal act.CENTER OF ATTENTION is the story of a former Mormon missionary turned murderer. It is also a riveting look behind the facade of the genetically blessed, seemingly prominent and pious Brown family of Laguna Beach, California. It is a tale of the family patriarch, John Brown, who disappeared without a trace ten years before his son. More important, it is the gripping and ultimately hopeful story of the sister of one of the world’s most wanted fugitives and her journey to accept that despite being a product of the same crazy environment as her brother, her life and path are her own.

Laughing IS Conceivable: One Woman's Extremely Funny Peek into the Extremely Unfunny World of Infertility


Lori Shandle-Fox - 2012
    uncertain of the outcome. It uses humor to de-stress infertility sufferers, their families and medical teams. It's relief for those who feel they just can't deal with infertility one minute more and that nobody truly understands. It's a fun and cheap gift for those friends and relatives who still don't "get it". It's a glimpse over the reception desk and at the other end of the examination table for medical professionals and their staffs who meet and treat infertile patients every day.It also has been widely read by those who know nothing or care nothing about infertility but enjoy the humor in life's daily angsts that we all can relate to.

Duck Dynasty: Family Faith and Family Fun


Kevin Michael Byrne - 2013
    (Hence the “Dynasty” part of the show.)But even though they may have large homes, the Robertson brothers love hunting and fishing and proudly proclaim themselves “rednecks.”Phil was a star quarterback at Louisiana Tech but turned down the offer to play in NFL because he didn’t want to miss the duck season where he began his business and spent 25 years making duck calls from Louisiana cedar trees.The now multi-million dollar enterprise is managed by Phil’s third son Willie who is CEO of the company, while his brother Jase is the COO.Despite their wealth, they still wear camouflage prints, they hunt - shooting anything that flies or walks, they’re religious, and they’re full of subtle humor.The Robertsons are a traditional family who believe in guns and God.In the following pages you’ll get to know the family members in the Robertson family and learn why the show Duck Dynasty is watched by millions.As Willie Robertson said when asked by he believes the show is so popular – “We try to stick to our roots.We grew up not rich at all.We try to stay humble. We’ve been successful and God has blessed us. We always have a family prayer at the end of the show.”

Silver Dolphins: The Emblem of the Enlisted Submariner


Richard Hansher - 2015
    The author doesn't pull any punches describing the good, the bad, the funny and the just plain ridiculous of the Submarine Service. Besides a wealth of information about what it's like to serve on a submarine, you'll meet real life characters like Tongue, Snake and Button Butt John. Did submarines make them rude, crude, and crazy. Or does the Submarine Service act as a magnet for every nut in the Navy? One thing is sure, after two months underwater, and with their back pay in their back pocket, Sub Sailors are as wild as cowboys after a cattle drive. Bar the doors and hide your daughters. Every reader owes it to themselves to use Amazons "Look In" feature to take a peek inside this unique and entertaining book.

Remember! (Translated)


Marcel Scharfstein - 2013
    Remember! is an autobiography which recounts Marcel Scharfstein's life experience in the Warsaw Ghetto and in Nazi concentration camps of Poland and Germany during World War II.

Squeaky Wheels: the Non-friction Adventure from Sea to Shining Sea


Scott Hippe - 2012
    As the voyage steams (sweats, rather) eastward from Seattle to New York, he meets a diverse, humorous, and motley bunch of individuals in full support of his spirit of adventure, evidence that one's wildest dreams are in fact worth pursuing. The story is a testament to the power of welcoming the stranger and the good that resides in us all. Read it to laugh, read it to learn, or read it simply to remember that you are human.They say once you start pedaling you can't stop. So buckle your helmet, don spandex if you dare, and get ready for the ride of a lifetime.

Summary of Jason Fung's The Obesity Code: Key Takeaways & Analysis


Sumoreads - 2017
    This book is a must-read for anyone who wants to shed off some extra weight without counting calories. Click buy now with 1-click to own your copy today!

If You Ain't a Pilot...


Ray Wright - 2016
    Though competing against one another for the flying assignments of their dreams, like the fearsome F-15 and F-16 fighters, a good mission sometimes takes a backseat to a good party or punch line in this classroom of cut-ups. The high stakes, however, loom over Lt. Wright. In a program where one out of three students fails, not everybody who starts UPT will finish it. And not everybody who does finish will get a desirable flying assignment. Some won’t even escape the Columbus Air Force Base. Will Lt. Wright get his dream assignment flying a C-141 cargo plane based out of beachside Charleston, South Carolina? Or be forced to perpetuate the If you ain’t a pilot… system as the dreaded FAIP (First Assignment Instructor Pilot) in Columbus, Mississippi? Though a military memoir, IF YOU AIN’T A PILOT… is a story of youthful innocence, a happy tale of the best of friends. Beneath the story’s surface layer of how an Air Force officer’s aeronautical rating determines his worth, similar thematic layers unfold around gender, race, and other ways people define each other. At its core, this story is about people, our relationships, and how we choose to treat each other. While 30 years have passed since the memoir’s events—and our aircraft, our enemy, and our pop-culture ties have changed—we still struggle with our differences. IF YOU AIN’T A PILOT taps into the mystic of Top Gun, the satirical wryness of Candide and Catch-22, and the allure of the air-travel genre captured by Mark Vanhoenacker’s recent Skyfaring: A Journey with a Pilot (2015), Tom Wolfe’s The Right Stuff, and James Salter’s The Hunters. Set at the end of the Cold War in the heart of Dixie, IF YOU AIN’T A PILOT…crosses Top Gun adrenaline with Pee-Wee’s Playhouse antics at a flight training base where Air Force idealism collides with Deep South heritage. Complete at 142,000 words, this comedic memoir written for a general audience charts the year when a newly commissioned officer is challenged not only by flight school but also by the Air Force dictum If you ain’t a pilot, you ain’t $#!+. That said, the primary mission for IF YOU AIN’T A PILOT...is to make readers laugh. While the story is written for a non-military audience, military pilots, civilian pilots, and any person who ever dreamed about flying as a kid will love IF YOU AIN’T A PILOT….