In this candid and often hilarious memoir, the celebrated director, comedian, writer, and actor offers a comprehensive, personal look at his tumultuous life. Beginning with his Brooklyn childhood and his stint as a writer for the Sid Caesar variety show in the early days of television, working alongside comedy greats, Allen tells of his difficult early days doing standup before he achieved recognition and success. With his unique storytelling pizzazz, he recounts his departure into moviemaking, with such slapstick comedies as Take the Money and Run, and revisits his entire, sixty-year-long, and enormously productive career as a writer and director, from his classics Annie Hall, Manhattan, and Annie and Her Sisters to his most recent films, including Midnight in Paris. Along the way, he discusses his marriages, his romances and famous friendships, his jazz playing, and his books and plays. We learn about his demons, his mistakes, his successes, and those he loved, worked with, and learned from in equal measure.   This is a hugely entertaining, deeply honest, rich and brilliant self-portrait of a celebrated artist who is ranked among the greatest filmmakers of our time.

    The man admitted he had attempted to siphon gas from a motor home but inadvertently put the siphon tube in the wrong tank. Instead of gasoline, the man sucked out the contents of the sewage holding tank. If stupidity were lethal, all of the criminals highlighted in The Stupid Crook Book would be dead. This book from highly successful author Leland H. Gregory III captures hilarious tales of captured criminals who are so dumb you almost feel sorry for them. Almost. This lineup of criminal bozos includes: * Michael Anthony Silver, who made a $250 call to a 1-900 psychic hotline in the course of robbing a home. When the phone bill came later that month the homeowners called the police, who traced the call back to the hotline. It turns out Silver used his real name with the psychic.* A would-be bank robber who fainted when a bank teller told him she had no money. The police later found his getaway car and discovered the key locked inside it.* Tony Bariteau, who was arrested and pled guilty to breaking into the Deja Vu store in Troy, Alabama-twice! He was arrested because the same witness spotted him smashing the same window and stealing much of the same merchandise. Deja vu indeed.* A wanted fugitive from Maryland who was running low on cash and stopped by a police station in Texas to ask for gas money. The police saved him the expense and gave him a free ride back to prison.The Stupid Crook Book builds on the successful trail Gregory blazed with America's Dumbest Criminals, the book he coauthored that spent 17 weeks on the New York Times best-seller list.Author's web site: www.realwacky.com/

    Your great-grandmother would be amazed to learn that toilet training has become one of Mom's greatest sources of anxiety and frustration during her child's early years. To Great-Grandma, it was no worse than teaching her child to use a spoon. Rosemond does not write from the perspective of a psychologist, but with the common sense and authority derived from 30 years of counseling parents, and from his two children and seven grandchildren, some of whom he helped toilet train. He advises an old-fashioned approach to toilet training that would have earned Grandma's stamp of approval. This book is helpful, revealing, and funny. Best of all, the method works! Thousands of parents have used it to discover how easy toilet training can be. With his trademark parents-take-control style, Rosemond covers everything from the basic how-to and troubleshooting issues to successful testimonies and proper encouragement. His straightforward and no-nonsense advice utilizes simple steps with proven results. No arguing, bribing, or cajoling necessary. It helps parents avoid common toilet-training mistakes, and leads the way to a diaper-free household.

    

    Packed with more than 1,000 jokes, anecdotes, cartoons, quotes, and stories contributed by professional comedians, joke writers, and readers of the magazine, this side-splitting compilation pokes fun at the facts and foibles of daily routines, illustrating that life is often funnier than fiction

    But did you know the type of flowers you give can speak volumes? The Secret Language of Flowers is a fascinating insight into the Victorian tradition of using flowers to convey secret messages, in a society where feelings often had to be suppressed. In this beautifully illustrated book - the perfect gift itself - Samantha Gray reveals how flowers came by their meanings in folklore and how flowers became the language of courtship, love, friendship, beauty and more. Discover the meanings behind over 50 flowers - such as how lily of the valley symbolises the return of happiness, how bluebells stand for constancy and everlasting love, and how daffodils represent high regard and chivalry. With stunning illustrations by artist Sarah Perkins that capture all of the beauty of flowers, this is an exceptionally lovely and fascinating gift book.

    What Dave Barry did for American history in Dave Barry Slept Here and for getting older in Dave Barry Turns Forty, he does for everything else in America! Tupperware ladies, eighties people and leisure-concept salesmen beware: Dave Barry is on the loose and no one is safe!

    A national bestseller with more than 750,000 copies in print, now revised for the new mothers of the '90s -- the latest findings on health, advice for working mothers, facts about the influence of TV, and more.B & W illustrations throughout.

    A collection of stories, poems,letters (all to Harry Secombe), fairy tales and a section headed 'Politics And Other Nonsense'.

    Over the past year, though, one sensation has dominated the Web: LOLcats. Here’s how it works: First you find a picture of a cat online, and then you add a caption that reflects the cat’s point of view. Just remember that although cats can speak English, their spelling and grammar is not so hot. Once you’re done, you have a LOLcat (laugh out loud cat). Since its founding in January 2007, icanhascheezburger .com (named after the most famous LOLcat of all) has been the center of the LOLcat world. I Can Has Cheezburger? collects 200 LOLcats from the enormously popular site, some classic and some new, in glorious and glossy full color. The book also highlights legendary LOLcat forms recognizable to fans everywhere (including “Do Not Want,” “Monorail Cat,” and “Oh Noes!”), and offers a guide to the finer points of LOLspeak. Packed with witty and endearing images and published into a proven cat-egory, I Can Has Cheezburger? is sure to delight feline aficionados and Internet nerds alike.

    STORIES WITH THE LOT!Save ten lives with a paperclip, discover how a big banana can ruin your sister's holiday, make a new friend with a garbage bin, develop a taste for sheep's spleen and chips, bounce on a vampire's bed, rescue your dad from a dog and a spider, use a toilet roll to get justice, upset the neighbours with a pickaxe, eat a pizza that makes you fearless, and imagine a world where teachers earn more money than a rock star.

    Baby becomes distressed at feeding times and refuses to feed or eats very little despite obvious hunger. Why won’t he/she eat? This is a question parents ask numerous health professionals while searching for a solution. Babies are typically diagnosed with one, two or three medical conditions to explain their aversive feeding behavior during brief appointments. Consequently, many parents don’t receive an effective solution from the health professionals they consult. This is why this book is so necessary. Rowena Bennett is an Australian nurse who holds professional qualifications in various nursing fields including pediatrics, midwifery, child health, mental health and lactation consultant. She has over 20 years experience advising parents how to resolve infant feeding and sleeping problems. Rowena has helped over 1000 babies get over their aversion to bottle-feeding and enjoy feeding once again. Parents claim the relief is life changing. In Your Baby’s Bottle-feeding Aversion, Rowena describes the various reasons babies display aversive feeding behavior, explains how the reader can identify the cause, and describes effective solutions. Included are step-by-step instructions on how to resolve a behavioral feeding aversion that occurs as a result of being repeatedly pressured to feed - the most common of all reasons for babies to become averse to feeding. Your Baby’s Bottle-feeding Aversion provides practical professional feeding advice that not only makes good sense, it works!

    You go to save the presentation that's taken you all week to complete—only to discover it's corrupt. Your bank slaps you with a $25 charge for overdrafting 25 cents… And all you can think is…WTF?Luckily for you, this book fills in the blanks and gives you humorous ideas for what to do when life makes them say, "what the f*#!?" Step by step, the authors take readers through inventively therapeutic, sometimes illegal, always hilarious solutions to life's many problematic situations.Whether it happens at the office or at home, out on the town or in the bedroom, life's most f*#!'ed-up situations are covered in this entertaining guide. Rather than turn lemons into lemonade, this book spits lemon juice into life's eye and gives it a good kick to the junk.

    The book uses captivating illustrations and carefully chosen words to teach children about "the farmer’s friend”. This series is known as one of the most beautiful on the kindle. The pictures look great even in black and white and are excellent on the full color kindle. The description in the large text beneath is simple enough for early readers or for a parent to guide a child through. There are also picture captions that provide more information to talk about with your child. Alternatively, a child of any age (even the child in you) can just look at the images and appreciate their beauty. This book depicts the wonder of the world of Snakes in all its glory. Children are given a well-rounded understanding of this beautiful reptile: its anatomy, feeding habits and behavior. The following Snakes are featured: * The magnificent Anaconda * The fearsome Boa Constrictor * The majestic Cobra * The gentle Corn Snake * The social Garter * The fierce Inland Taipan * The awesome Python * The ominous Rattlesnake * The stealthy Sea Snake Get this book at this SPECIAL PRICE exclusive to the Amazon Store. *** Your child will love it - this is guaranteed.***

    This friendly and informative guide is the essential how-to book for shooting gorgeous instant pictures with personal panache and a touch of romance. Packed with tips on how to shoot with various cameras, details about the different types of film available, advice on composition and lighting techniques, plus creative projects to transform snapshots into keepsake mementos and portfolios of beautiful images for inspiration, this is the ultimate companion for capturing instant memories.