We have your favourite table ready and waiting and a selection of tasty and unusual dishes for your delectation and delight (but do bear in mind that the kitchen closes shortly as the Chef needs to go to his second job, rodding out blocked sewers). We have a few choice 'nostalgedy' stories for Starters, some meatier ones for your Mains, a selection of 'curmudgeonly rants' or keen observations (you take your choice) for Dessert, and something unspeakable to go with your Coffee and Mints.Philip Whiteland tickles your fancy (it's not a crime yet) once again with this compilation of stories, often with a food-based theme, from today and yesterday. Pull up a chair and tuck in!

    She was lonely and unsettled - her parents had been killed in a car accident, her boyfriend had decided to go back to his wife, and as a painter she led a solitary life in her North Yorkshire home town. But she felt immediately at home in the gracious stone house that had been bequeathed to her, and was made welcome by the local residents - in particular, by the members of the Mindon Amateur Dramatic Society (somewhat appropriately known as MADS) presided over by the formidable Ursula. Ursula liked to run things her way, and brooked no opposition when the ambitious decision was made (largely by herself) to put on A Midsummer Night's Dream as their next production. Petra , to her surprise and pleasure, was put in charge of the wardrobe. Rivalries, squabbles, love affairs and seething resentments threatened to scupper the production, and all Ursula's managerial skills were needed to prevent disaster. But Petra had more pressing things on her mind than the costumes for the cast. A mystery from her past began to haunt her - and the answer to that mystery might solve the puzzle of why she had been left such a beautiful house by a total stranger.

    The tables turn when Marjorie is able to subdue Raul and keep him tied up in her fireplace. When Terry and Patricia, Marjorie's roommates, come home, they are shocked and begin discussing how to handle the situation: call the police or take matters into their own hands?

    (doubling possible.) / 5 ints. or unit set. Recently revived on Broadway to great acclaim, this is the rollicking tale of three down and out troupers who decide to head for Hollywood and try their luck with the newly invented talkies. Due to a series of consistent blunders, the most stupid of the three is carried to pinnacles of fame and fortune until he's literally made a god of the industry. It's a fast paced and wild romp and a marvelous spoof of tinsel land.

    Millicent Le Sueur is an eccentric, obsessive-compulsive bag lady in a rural Southern town who witnesses the killing of a teenage girl. Or so she claims. Some townsfolk believe she killed the girl and made up the story to cover her crime. Counting, checking, deducing and tracking, she looks for a killer she hopes won’t count her as the next victim.

    McQueen (no relation, unfortunately) seems to have a knack for bad luck. But a failed marriage, a stalled career, a judgmental ex-wife, a distant daughter, a horrid little studio apartment in the far reaches of the London suburbs-all these pathetic elements seem to pale in the chiseled face of his newest tormentor: the Twelfth Sexiest Man in the World, Josh Harper.Josh is the star of Mad, Bad, and Dangerous to Know, a biographical play about Lord Byron-and Stephen is his understudy. Not only is Josh fantastically, infuriatingly good-looking, internationally renowned, and remarkably talented, he's also frustratingly healthy. No matter how many all-night booze-and-coke benders Josh goes on, he always shows up at the stage door for his call like clockwork. Stephen doubts he'll ever get his chance to slip on the puffy shirt and tight breeches of Byron and tread the boards in the role that would certainly be the break he's always waited for.And just when Stephen's sure he couldn't resent Josh more, he meets Josh's witty, restless American wife, Nora . . . and discovers he likes her a little too much. Another man might curse his luck at finding that his potential dream woman is a rival's wife, but at this point, Stephen would expect nothing else. Caught between his stirring feelings for Nora, the demands of an insistent and secretive Josh, and his lifelong desire for a real career in show business, Stephen must make a terrible decision: Will it be the girl or the fame?A hapless, bumbling bloke in love, an arrogant megastar with a potpourri of addictions, a sexy married woman out of her element in the fast lane-David Nicholls brings them all together in this knockout romantic comedy.From the Hardcover edition.

    Songs include: Heaven on Their Minds * Everything's Alright * Hosanna * Pilate's Dream * I Don't Know How to Love Him * The Last Supper * I Only Want to Say (Gethsemane) * King Herod's Song * Superstar.

    Get paid to travel and write about it.Only no one told Jules that it would mean eating oily seabirds, repeatedly falling off a husky sled, getting stranded on a Mediterranean island, and crash-landing in Iran.The exotic destinations come thick and fast – Hong Kong, Hawaii, Huddersfield – as Jules navigates what it means to be a travel writer in a world with endless surprises up its sleeve.Add in a cast of larger-than-life characters – Elvis, Captain Cook, his own travel-mad Dad – and an eye for the ridiculous, and this journey with Jules is one you won’t want to miss.

    In this book I have set out prove that statement is completely untrue and in fact with customers like these then maybe the opposite could be said. So sit back, grab your self a drink perhaps an alcoholic one if you feel that way inclined and enjoy some of the strangest, ridiculous and most outrageous complaints and statements from all walks of life. The second volume is out now and is much longer and in my opinion even better than the first, though i would say that.

    Jarvis may be an all-round irritant, but he's harmless & deep down he's got a heart of gold. As his oldest (& only) friend reflects on his life with Jarvis Ham, he wonders what it would have been like if they had never met.

    Looking for Something New and Really Funny? Imagine you can get it with JUST ONE CLICK! Yes, this is a JOKE BOOK of your dreams. Vol.1 of the Donald's Humor Factory series. This super funny adult joke book is free of swear words. Donald Shaw is a popular comic and an award-winning humor books author (his wife gave him a French kiss award)! His jokes are loved by thousands of people from Alaska to Zimbabwe, and possibly outside of Earth. Joking is always fun! Jokes bring smiles to people’s faces. Jokes make us laugh. People fall in love when they smile at each other. We love joking in the company of our best friends and families. Jokes help us to relax and overcome any difficulties. Joking is an awesome social skill and a great way to make new friends and to communicate nearly in any surrounding. Many people also love just to read some good jokes for amusement. However, it is not that easy to find real good jokes today. Some of them are simply out-of-date. Some of them are not clean enough. You may also find many joke books that are not really funny and contain too much fluff and advertising. This jokes book is different! Buying this humor book you will get: A great collection of 300 FUNNY JOKES One-liners, real-life awkward situations, and hilarious short stories Great book to read on a long trip Clean and dirty jokes WITHOUT nasty words Jokes for adults and teenagers Jokes about relationship, marriage, bar, professions, hobbies, etc. LIMITED TIME BONUS: the link to download my FREE HUMOR LIBRARY that includes hundreds of great jokes for kids, adults, and teenagers. So the whole family may have fun! This is no-brainer, really! This book is free of racism. I support LGBT community, because love is love. I love all people in the world and I want to make you laugh and smile! This is my ultimate goal and I did not mean to insult anyone. So relax, take it easy and enjoy this humor book! Buy this funny book NOW and roll on the floor laughing! Pick up your copy today by clicking the BUY NOW button at the top of this page!

    Vocal selections from the popular Broadway musical, including: 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee * My Friend, the Dictionary * Pandemonium * I'm Not That Smart * Magic Foot * Prayer of the Comfort Counselor * My Unfortunate Erection * Woe Is Me * I Speak Six Languages * The I Love You Song.

    She is addicted to the feeling of being on stage, looking out at expectant, up-turned mouths, waiting for the first laugh to hit. A first laugh that will not happen unless she creates it. But Brenda is clueless. The on-off girlfriend of a prolific comedian, it is only after she realises his best stage material consists of recycled versions of her own restless, smart-arsed energy that she begins to wonder whether she might be better off keeping her jokes for herself - and so she finds herself making her very first walk to the mark on stage in front of a bare brick wall, with just a spotlight and a PA system for cover, wondering what we all wonder from time to time: am I funny? A book as much about the thrill of performance as it is about what goes on when the microphone is switched off, Brenda Monk is Funny is a blackly humourous and devastatingly candid snapshot of the reality, the brutality and fragility of the comedy industry from an exciting new voice in fiction.

    The lifetime work of Professor Alexander Schmidt of Königsberg, this book has long been the indispensable companion for every person seriously interested in Shakespeare, Renaissance poetry and prose of any sort, or English literature. It is really two important books in one.Schmidt’s set contains every single word that Shakespeare used, not simply words that have changed their meaning since the seventeenth century, but every word in all the accepted plays and the poems. Covering both quartos and folios, it carefully distinguishes between shades of meaning for each word and provides exact definitions, plus governing phrases and locations, down to the numbered line of the Cambridge edition of Shakespeare. There is no other word dictionary comparable to this work.Even more useful to the general reader, however, is the incredible wealth of exact quotations. Arranged under the words of the quotation itself (hence no need to consult confusing subject classifications) are more than 50,000 exact quotations. Each is precisely located, so that you can easily refer back to the plays or poems themselves, if you wish context.Other features helpful to the scholar are appendixes on basic grammatical observations, a glossary of provincialisms, a list of words and sentences taken from foreign languages, a list of words that form the latter part of word-combinations. This third edition features a supplement with new findings.

    He is a fat man. A fat man with thin limbs, like an egg with tentacles. And life is not going well. He’s alone, idle, and on the brink of a medical crisis when a childhood acquaintance makes him an offer he can’t understand, can’t talk about, but ultimately can’t refuse. A week later, he finds himself in the wilds of Scotland, plunged into an eccentric community at war over a wind farm. He’s supposed to be a backer, but he has no idea what side he’s on, even though it may bag him a lot of money. All he wants is to look like a hero in front of the woman with the bright blue eyes who brought him here. To do so he must run the gauntlet of a family with many dark secrets, some dangerous hippies and their hallucinogenic potions, and the wilderness itself with all its threats and dangers. Whirligig is a raucous, joyous, often poignant comedy about the redemptive power of the countryside. Written with peerless wit, it’s a timely fable that takes its place within the tradition of the Great English Comic Novel. It’s The Wicker Man as told by P.G. Wodehouse.