The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America


Matt Kracht - 2019
    Featuring 50 common North American birds, such as the White-Breasted Butt Nugget and the Goddamned Canada Goose (or White-Breasted Nuthatch and Canada Goose for the layperson), Matt Kracht identifies all the idiots in your backyard and details exactly why they suck with ink drawings. Each entry is accompanied by facts about a bird's (annoying) call, its (dumb) migratory pattern, its (downright tacky) markings, and more.The essential guide to all things wings with migratory maps, tips for birding, musings on the avian population, and the ethics of birdwatching.

The Ladybird Book of Red Tape


Jason A. Hazeley - 2016
    __________________________________'Your call is important to us,' says the lady on the help-line.The call is important because it is currently making the company 48p per minute.'__________________________________'Sam has forgotten her password so she cannot access her e-mail account.She can reset her password using a memorable name, but she has forgotten her memorable name too, so the account locks.Sam automatically receives a link so she can reset her password.It is sent to her e-mail account.'__________________________________This delightful book is the latest in the series of Ladybird books which have been specially planned to help grown-ups with the world about them. The large clear script, the careful choice of words, the frequent repetition and the thoughtful matching of text with pictures all enable grown-ups to think they have taught themselves to cope. Featuring original Ladybird artwork alongside brilliantly funny, brand new text. 'Hilarious' Stylist Other new titles for Autumn 2017:How it Works: The BrotherHow it Works: The SisterThe Ladybird Book of the ExThe Ladybird Book of the NerdThe Ladybird Book of the New YouThe Ladybird Book of BallsThe Ladybird Book of the Big Night OutThe Ladybird Book of the Quiet Night InPeople at Work: The Rock Star Previous titles in the Ladybirds for Grown Ups series: How it Works: The HusbandHow it Works: The WifeHow it Works: The MumHow it Works: The DadThe Ladybird Book of the Mid-Life CrisisThe Ladybird Book of the HangoverThe Ladybird Book of MindfulnessThe Ladybird Book of the ShedThe Ladybird Book of DatingThe Ladybird Book of the HipsterHow it Works: The StudentHow it Works: The CatHow it Works: The DogHow it Works: The Grandparent The Ladybird Book of Red TapeThe Ladybird Book of the People Next DoorThe Ladybird Book of the SickieThe Ladybird Book of the Zombie ApocalypseThe Ladybird Book of the Do-Gooder

Uncle Shelby's ABZ Book


Shel Silverstein - 1961
    Uncle Shelby's Abz Book

T-Rex Trying and Trying: The Unfortunate Trials of a Modern Prehistoric Family


Hugh Murphy - 2014
    In T-Rex Trying and Trying, the loveable lizard king is back . . . this time with his family, She-Rex and Wee-Rex. Featuring never-before-seen content and the best from the site, Murphy’s 120 drawings feature:• T-Rex trying to take a selfie• She-Rex trying to catch a bouquet at awedding• T-Rex trying to change a diaper• T-Rex trying to tell people he’s choking• Wee-Rex trying to crawl• T-Rex trying to measure his inseam• and many, many more!An adorable and hilarious book, this is the perfect gift for readers of all ages.

A Wealth of Pigeons: A Cartoon Collection


Steve Martin - 2020
    I have done stand-up, sketches, movies, monologues, awards show introductions, sound bites, blurbs, talk show appearances, and tweets, but the idea of a one-panel image with or without a caption mystified me. I felt like, yeah, sometimes I'm funny, but there are these other weird freaks who are actually funny. You can understand that I was deeply suspicious of these people who are actually funny." So writes the multitalented comedian Steve Martin in his introduction to A Wealth of Pigeons: A Cartoon Collection. In order to venture into this lauded territory of cartooning, he partnered with the heralded New Yorker cartoonist Harry Bliss. Steve shared caption and cartoon ideas, Harry provided impeccable artwork, and together they created this collection of humorous cartoons and comic strips, with amusing commentary about their collaboration throughout. The result: this gorgeous, funny, singular book, perfect to give as a gift or to buy for yourself.

Pop Sonnets: Shakespearean Spins on Your Favorite Songs


Erik Didriksen - 2015
    All of your favorite artists are represented in these pages—from Bon Jovi and Green Day to Miley Cyrus, Beyoncé, and beyond. Already a smash sensation on the Internet—the Tumblr page has 20,000+ followers—Pop Sonnets has been featured by the A.V. Club, BuzzFeed, and Vanity Fair, among many others. More than half of these pop sonnets are exclusive to this collection and have never been published in any form.

Squids Will be Squids: Fresh Morals, Beastly Fables


Jon Scieszka - 1998
    A general moral offered by the book is, "If you are planning to write fables, don't forget to change people's names and avoid places with high cliffs".

Subpar Parks: America's Most Extraordinary National Parks and Their Least Impressed Visitors


Amber Share - 2021
     Subpar Parks, both on the popular Instagram page and in this humorous, informative, and collectible book, combines two things that seem like they might not work together yet somehow harmonize perfectly: beautiful illustrations and informative, amusing text celebrating each national park paired with the one-star reviews disappointed tourists have left online. Millions of visitors each year enjoy Glacier National Park, but for one visitor, it was simply Too cold for me! Another saw the mind-boggling vistas of Bryce Canyon as Too spiky! Never mind the person who visited the thermal pools at Yellowstone National Park and left thinking, "Save yourself some money, boil some water at home."Featuring more than 50 percent new material, the book will include more depth and insight into the most popular parks, such as Yosemite, Yellowstone, the Grand Canyon, and Acadia National Parks; anecdotes and tips from rangers; and much more about author Amber Share's personal love and connection to the outdoors. Equal parts humor and love for the national parks and the great outdoors, it's the perfect gift for anyone who loves to spend time outside as well as have a good read (and laugh) once they come indoors.

Horseradish


Lemony Snicket - 2007
    Witty and irreverent, Horseradish is a book with universal appeal, a delightful vehicle to introduce Snicket's uproariously unhappy observations to a crowd not yet familiar with the Baudelaires' misadventures.

Dumpty: The Age of Trump in Verse


John Lithgow - 2019
    Chronicling the last few raucous years in American politics, Lithgow takes readers verse by verse through the history of Donald Trump's presidency.- Lampoons the likes of Betsy DeVos, William Barr, Rudy Giuliani, and dozens more.- Illustrated from cover to cover with Lithgow's never-before-seen line drawings.- Draws inspiration from A. A. Milne, Lewis Carroll, Edward Lear, and even Mother Goose.- Great for fans of A Very Stable Genius by Mike Luckovich, Win Bigly: Persuasion in a World Where Facts Don't Matter by Scott Adams, and The Donald J. Trump Presidential Twitter Library by The Daily Show with Trevor Noah.The poems collected in Dumpty draw inspiration from A. A. Milne, Lewis Carroll, Edward Lear, Rodgers and Hammerstein, Mother Goose, and many more. A feat of laugh-out-loud lyrical storytelling, this timely volume is bound to bring joy to poetry lovers, political junkies, and Lithgow fans alike.

5 Very Good Reasons to Punch a Dolphin in the Mouth and Other Useful Guides


Matthew Inman - 2010
    The hilarity of TheOatmeal.com is now presented in book form with 35 never-before-seen pieces and 25 classic favorites from the Web site, including 6 Types of Crappy Hugs and 17 Things Worth Knowing about Your Cat.In Matthew Inman's New York Times best selling 5 Very Good Reasons to Punch a Dolphin in the Mouth (And Other Useful Guides), samurai sword-wielding kittens and hamsters that love .50-caliber machine guns commingle with a cracked out Tyrannosaur that is extremely hard to potty train. Bacon is better than true love and you may awake in the middle of the night to find your nephew nibbling on your toes.Inman creates these quirky scenes for theoatmeal.com, which launched in July 2009 and already has more than 82 million page views. In fact, every 15 to 30 seconds, someone Googles one of theoatmeal.com's creations. Now, 60 of Inman's comic illustrations and life-bending guides are presented in full-color inside 5 Very Good Reasons to Punch a Dolphin in the Mouth (And Other Useful Guides). Consider such handy advice as: 4 Reasons to Carry a Shovel at All Times, 6 Types of Crappy Hugs, 8 Ways to Tell if Your Loved One Plans to Eat You, 17 Things Worth Knowing About Your Cat, and 20 Things Worth Knowing About Beer.

You're Only Old Once!: A Book for Obsolete Children


Dr. Seuss - 1986
    Seuss creates a classic picture-book ode to aging in You're Only Old Once! On a visit to "the Golden Years Clinic on Century Square for Spleen Readjustment and Muffler Repair," readers will laugh with familiar horror at the poking and prodding and testing and ogling that go hand in hand with the dreaded appellation of "senior citizen." Though Dr. Seuss is known for his peerless work in books for children, this comical look at what it's like to get older is ideal for Seuss fans of advanced years. In his own words, this is "a book for obsolete children." A perfect gift for retirement, birthdays, and holidays!

Puff, the Magic Dragon


Peter Yarrow - 2007
    Yet singer/songwriter Peter Yarrow and co-composer Lenny Lipton have never allowed a picture book adaptation of this magical tale…until now. With Yarrow’s and Lipton’s blessing, Puff, Jackie Paper, and the land of Honalee finally live on the page. The exquisite package includes a cloth case with a tipped-in illustration and an embossed jacket with foil touches, as well as an exclusive CD featuring not only Puff, but several other songs performed by Yarrow, his daughter Bethany, and cellist Rufus Cappadocia. This is a publishing event sure to attract broad attention and please Puff’s many fans.In richly-hued paintings of the deepest sea blues and greens, Puff and his friend Jackie Paper frolic in the land of Honalee—traveling in a fantastic boat with billowed sails, climbing red castle stairs onto a balcony to meet with noble kings and princes, and watching pirate ships lower their flags for the roaring dragon. Artist Eric Puybaret has brought an entire magical world into being with enthralling landscapes, color, and characters. And everyone will love the way the art cleverly turns the song’s end, which at first seemed so sad, into a surprising and joyful moment.Best of all—this is only the first of many more collaborations with Peter Yarrow to come!

Everything I Need To Know I Learned From a Little Golden Book


Diane Muldrow - 2013
    In this age of debt, depression, and diabetes, could we adults use a refresher course in the gentle lessons from these adorable books, she wondered—a "Little Golden guide to life"? Yes, we could! Muldrow's humorous yet practical tips for getting the most out of life ("Don't forget to enjoy your wedding!" "Be a hugger." "Sweatpants are bad for morale."), drawn from more than 60 stories, are paired with delightful images from these best-loved children's books of all time—among them The Poky Little Puppy, Pantaloon, Mister Dog, Nurse Nancy, We Help Mommy, Five Pennies to Spend, and The Little Red Hen. The Golden greats of children's illustration are represented here as well: Richard Scarry, Garth Williams, Eloise Wilkin, J. P. Miller, and Mary Blair, among many others. Sure to bring memories and a smile, this book is a perfect gift for baby boomers, recent grads, lovers of children's literature—or anyone who cherishes the sturdy little books with the shiny cardboard covers and gold foil spines!

One Minute till Bedtime: 60-Second Poems to Send You off to Sleep


Kenn NesbittNaomi Shihab Nye - 2016
    Reach for a one-minute poem!Former Children's Poet Laureate Kenn Nesbitt presents a blockbuster collection of all-new poetry penned by some of the most beloved and celebrated poets of our time, including Jack Prelutsky, Jon Scieszka, Mary Ann Hoberman, Nikki Grimes, Lemony Snicket, Jane Yolen, and many more. Illuminated with dreamlike wit and whimsy by New York Times illustrator and award-winning artist Christoph Niemann, here is a new bedtime classic. When the busy day is drawing to a close and the whole family is ready for rest, take a minute for poetry and send your little ones off to sleep.