Boundaries: Where You End And I Begin: How To Recognize And Set Healthy Boundaries


Anne Katherine - 1991
    In fact, they are essential for our mental and physical health as well as for developing healthy relationships. Yet every day, people's boundaries are violated by friends, family, or coworkers. Despite the importance of personal boundaries many people are unaware of how or when these very important lines are crossed.Which of the following are boundary violations? * Esther tells Betty a secret Mary told her.* Your therapist invites you to go for coffee.* Your boss wants to know the details of your personal life.* Your boss asks you if you'd like a hug.* Mom tells little Debbie about her troubles with Dad.* Your new neighbor pats you on the bottom as he turns away.* Your mother makes a comment about your being overweight. All but one of the above incidents violate boundaries (your boss asks you if you'd like a hug). In Boundaries: Where You End and I Begin, Anne Katherine explains what healthy boundaries are, how to recognize if your personal boundaries are being violated, and what you can do to protect yourself.For anyone who has walked away from a conversation, a meeting, or a visit with others feeling violated and not understanding why, this is a book that can help.

The Stoic Challenge: A Philosopher's Guide to Becoming Tougher, Calmer, and More Resilient


William B. Irvine - 2019
    We often think that these responses are hardwired, but fortunately this is not the case. Philosopher William B. Irvine combines key lessons from the ancient Stoics— thinkers including Marcus Aurelius and Seneca—with modern psychological techniques such as anchoring and framing to develop a surprisingly simple strategy for dealing with life’s unpleasant surprises. These include minor setbacks like being caught in a traffic jam or having a flight cancelled, as well as major setbacks, like those experienced by physicist Stephen Hawking, who slowly lost the ability to move, and surfer Bethany Hamilton, who lost an arm to a shark.By using the updated Stoic strategy, we can transform life’s setbacks into opportunities for becoming calmer, tougher, and more resilient. The Stoic Challenge is a practical guide to using centuries- old wisdom to help us better cope with the stresses of modern living.

Healing the Child Within: Discovery and Recovery for Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families


Charles L. Whitfield - 1987
    Whitfield provides a clear and effective introduction to the basic principles of recovery. This book is a modern classic, as fresh and useful today as it was more than a decade ago when first published. Here, frontline physician and therapist Charles Whitfield describes the process of wounding that the Child Within (True Self) experiences and shows how to differentiate the True Self from the false self. He also describes the core issues of recovery and more. Other writings on this topic have come and gone, while Healing the Child Within has remained a strong introduction to recognizing and healing from the painful effects of childhood trauma. Highly recommended by therapists and survivors of trauma.

Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss


Hope Edelman - 1994
    First published a decade ago, it is still the book that motherless daughters of all ages look to for understanding and comfort and that they press into each other's hands. Building on interviews with hundreds of mother-loss survivors, this life-affirming book is now newly expanded to reflect the author's personal experience with the continued legacy of mother loss; now married and a mother of young children herself, Edelman better understands how the effects of mother loss change over time and in light of new relationships. A work of stunning courage and honesty, Motherless Daughters is a must read for the millions of women whose mothers have gone, but whose need for healing, mourning, and mothering remains. It is a timeless classic.

The Enneagram: A Christian Perspective


Richard Rohr - 1989
    Richard Rohr and Andrea Ebert's runaway best-seller shows both the basic logic of the Enneagram and its harmony with the core truths of Christian thought from the time of the early Church forward.

The Awakened Family: A Revolution in Parenting


Shefali Tsabary - 2016
    . . you will be wowed and awed by [Dr. Shefali]." —Oprah WinfreyNew from the New York Times bestselling author of The Conscious Parent comes a radically transformative plan that shows parents how to raise children to be their best, truest selves.What if...?What if I told you that you can put an end to all of your parenting struggles?That you can learn to parent without fear or anxiety?That you can end conflict with your children?That you can create close and connected relationships within your family?…Would you accept this invitation to a revolution in parenting?We all have the capacity to raise children who are highly resilient and emotionally connected. However, many of us are unable to because we are blinded by modern misconceptions of parenting and our own inner limitations. In The Awakened Family, I show you how you can cultivate a relationship with your children so they can thrive; moreover, you can be transformed to a state of greater calm, compassion and wisdom as well.This book will take you on a journey to transcending your fears and illusions around parenting and help you become the parent you always wanted to be: fully present and conscious. It will arm you with practical, hands-on strategies and real-life examples from my experience as a parent and clinical psychologist that show the extraordinary power of being a conscious parent.Everyone in your family is ready to be awakened.Will you take this journey with me?—Shefali

Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive


Kristin Neff - 2021
    Now, ten years and many studies later, she expands her body of work to explore a brand-new take on self-compassion. Although kindness and self-acceptance allow us to be with ourselves as we are, in all our glorious imperfection, the desire to alleviate suffering at the heart of this mindset isn't always gentle, sometimes it's fierce. We must also act courageously in order to protect ourselves from harm and injustice, say no to others so we can meet our own needs, and motivate necessary change in ourselves and society. Gender roles demand that women be soft and nurturing, not angry or powerful. But like yin and yang, the energies of fierce and tender self-compassion must be balanced for wholeness and wellbeing. Drawing on a wealth of research, her personal life story and empirically supported practices, Neff demonstrates how women can use fierce and tender self-compassion to succeed in the workplace, engage in caregiving without burning out, be authentic in relationships, and end the silence around sexual harassment and abuse. Most women intuitively recognize fierceness as part of their true nature, but have been discouraged from developing it. Women must reclaim their power in order to create a healthier society and find lasting happiness. In this wise, caring, and enlightening book, Neff shows women how to reclaim balance within themselves, so they can help restore balance in the world.

What If This Were Enough?: Essays


Heather Havrilesky - 2018
    In her work for New York, The Baffler, The New York Times Magazine, and The Atlantic, as well as in her advice column for The Cut, "Ask Polly," she dispenses a singular, cutting wisdom--an ability to inspire, provoke, and put a name to our most insidious cultural delusions.What If This Were Enough? is a mantra and a clarion call. In its chapters--many of them original to the book, others expanded from their initial publication--Havrilesky takes on those cultural forces that shape us. From the enforced cheer of American life to the celebration of survivalism, from the allure of materialism to our misunderstandings of romance and success, Havrilesky deconstructs some of the most poisonous and misleading messages we ingest today, all the while suggesting new ways we might navigate our increasingly bewildering world.Through her incisive and witty inquiries, Havrilesky emphasizes the importance of locating the miraculous within the mundane. In these timely, provocative, and often hilarious chapters, she urges readers to embrace the flawed--to connect with what already is, who we already are, what we already have. She asks us to consider: What if this were enough? Our salvation, Havrilesky asserts, can be found right here, right now, in this imperfect moment.The smile factory --The happiest place on earth --To infinity and beyond --Playing house --Delusion at the gastropub --Adults only --Stuffed --Running on empty --Lost treasure --Land of heroic villains --The popularity contest --Tag and release --Haunted --Bravado --Survival fantasies --True romance --A scourge of gurus --My mother's house --Miracle of the mundane

The Courage to be Happy: True Contentment Is In Your Power


Ichiro Kishimi - 2016
    In The Courage To Be Happy, Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga again distil their wisdom into simple yet profound advice to show us how we, too, can use twentieth-century psychological theory to find true happiness.

How to Be Alone: If You Want To, and Even If You Don't


Lane Moore - 2018
    But her story has had its obstacles, including being her own parent, living in her car as a teenager, and moving to New York City to pursue her dreams. Through it all, she looked to movies, TV, and music as the family and support systems she never had.From spending the holidays alone to having better “stranger luck” than with those closest to her to feeling like the last hopeless romantic on earth, Lane reveals her powerful and entertaining journey in all its candor, anxiety, and ultimate acceptance—with humor always her bolstering force and greatest gift.How to Be Alone is a must-read for anyone whose childhood still feels unresolved, who spends more time pretending to have friends online than feeling close to anyone in real life, who tries to have genuine, deep conversations in a roomful of people who would rather you not. Above all, it’s a book for anyone who desperately wants to feel less alone and a little more connected through reading her words.

Embrace Your Weird: Face Your Fears and Unleash Creativity


Felicia Day - 2019
    Including Felicia’s personal stories and hard-won wisdom, Embrace Your Weird offers: —Entertaining and revelatory exercises that empower you to be fearless, so you can rediscover the things that bring you joy, and crack your imagination wide open —Unique techniques to vanquish enemies of creativity like: anxiety, fear, procrastination, perfectionism, criticism, and jealousy —Tips to cultivate a creative community —Space to explore and get your neurons firing Whether you enjoy writing, baking, painting, podcasting, playing music, or have yet to uncover your favorite creative outlet, Embrace Your Weird will help you unlock the power of self-expression. Get motivated. Get creative. Get weird.

Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times


Katherine May - 2020
    These periods of dislocation can be lonely and unexpected. For May, her husband fell ill, her son stopped attending school, and her own medical issues led her to leave a demanding job. Wintering explores how she not only endured this painful time, but embraced the singular opportunities it offered.A moving personal narrative shot through with lessons from literature, mythology, and the natural world, May’s story offers instruction on the transformative power of rest and retreat. Illumination emerges from many sources: solstice celebrations and dormice hibernation, C.S. Lewis and Sylvia Plath, swimming in icy waters and sailing arctic seas.Ultimately Wintering invites us to change how we relate to our own fallow times. May models an active acceptance of sadness and finds nourishment in deep retreat, joy in the hushed beauty of winter, and encouragement in understanding life as cyclical, not linear. A secular mystic, May forms a guiding philosophy for transforming the hardships that arise before the ushering in of a new season.

The 5 Personality Patterns: Your Guide to Understanding Yourself and Others and Developing Emotional Maturity


Steven Kessler - 2015
    Suddenly, you can see what's going on inside people: you can see what motivates and matters to them and how to influence and communicate with them successfully. Finally, you have a simple, clear, true-to-life map of personality that gives you the key to understanding people and interacting with them successfully. The 5 Personality Patterns is a book that can change your life. "This is one of the most useful popular psychology books I have ever seen. . . . It should become a classic." --- Stephen M. Johnson, author of Character Styles and Characterological TransformationMuch of our human suffering is not necessary. It is created by old safety strategies that helped us survive our childhood traumas, but then got stuck in our bodies. Reinforced by the power of habit, they continue to shape our actions and personality even today. They have become an invisible prison. We live our lives trapped in that prison, repeating the same mistakes over and over again.As we attempt to understand the psychology of success and become successful ourselves, studying the habits of successful people is not enough. To create real self transformation, we must dissolve the obstacles to success buried within us. To reclaim our power and regain control of our lives, we must uncover the old safety strategies and patterns that still run our lives so that we can heal and transform them.Often, these patterns have shaped us so deeply that we think that's who we are. But in fact, they cover up our true self and prevent it from shining out into the world. Finally, we have a map of these patterns, a map that will help you:- Discover how you got stuck and how to get free- Heal your core wounds- Learn the skills you missed- Communicate effectively with others- Develop emotional maturityMany readers seeking self improvement have discovered that this map of personality is even more helpful to them than the Enneagram and Myers-Briggs personality types, because those maps focus on the surface of the body, on your behaviors, while this map starts with the core of the body and how the flow of your life energy got distorted. And that distortion of the flow of life energy through the body is at the root of much of the suffering and conflict we experience in interpersonal relationships. Understanding those differences will dramatically increase your empathy, compassion, and people skills. Understanding how to bridge those differences will dramatically increase your interpersonal communication skills.

Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come: An Introvert's Year of Living Dangerously


Jessica Pan - 2019
    She wrote a list: improv, a solo holiday and... talking to strangers on the tube. She regretted it instantly.Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come follows Jess's hilarious and painful year of misadventures in extroverting, reporting back from the frontlines for all the introverts out there.But is life actually better or easier for the extroverts? Or is it the nightmare Jess always thought it would be?

I Don't Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression


Terrence Real - 1997
    And these escape attempts only hurt the people men love and pass their condition on to their children.This ground breaking book is the "pathway out of darkness" that these men and their families seek. Real reveals how men can unearth their pain, heal themselves, restore relationships, and break the legacy of abuse. He mixes penetrating analysis with compelling tales of his patients and even his ownexperiences with depression as the son of a violent, depressed father and the father of two young sons.