Bad Kitty Gets a Bath


Nick Bruel - 2008
    The following are some items you will need for Kitty's bath: one bathtub, plenty of water, dry towels, a suit of armor, a letter to your loved ones, clean underwear (because stressful situations can cause "accidents"), an ambulance in your driveway with the engine running, and, oh, yeah, you'll also need Kitty…but good luck with that! Since its publication in 2005, BAD KITTY has captured the hearts of cat lovers and haters alike. This time Kitty is at her worst in this riotous how-to guide filled with bad smells, cautionary tales of horror, and hopefully by the end…some soap. The funniest of any of Kitty's adventures, though don't tell her that.

Emily's Runaway Imagination


Beverly Cleary - 1961
    Her runaway imagination leads her to bleach a horse, hold a very scary sleepover, and feed the hogs an unusual treat. But can she use her lively mind to help bring a library to Pitchfork?Adventure is pretty scarce in Pitchfork, Oregon. So why shouldn't Emily bleach Dad's old plow horse or try some of her other ideas? "Written with Cleary's customary warmth and humor...The time of the story, about 1920, is delightfully brought to life." -Booklist

Lemony Snicket: The Unauthorized Autobiography


Lemony Snicket - 2002
    Before purchasing, borrowing, or stealing this book, you should be aware that it contains the answers to some of those questions, such as the following:1. Who is Lemony?2. Is there a secret organization I should know about?3. Why does Lemony Snicket spend his time researching and writing distressing books concerning the Baudelaire orphans?4. Why do all of Lemony Snicket's books contain a sad dedication to a woman named Beatrice?5. If there's nothing out there, what was that noise?Our advice to you is that you find a book that answers less upsetting questions than this one. Perhaps your librarian, bookseller, or parole officer can recommend a book that answers the question, "Aren't ponies adorable?"

Rise of the Balloon Goons


Troy Cummings - 2013
    With easy-to-read text, high-interest content, fast-paced plots, and illustrations on every page, these books will boost reading confidence and stamina. Branches books help readers grow!Alexander has just moved to a new town where he is about to uncover all sorts of monsters! He finds an old notebook with the word "DOOM" inscribed on the front cover. The Notebook of Doom, which Alexander now holds, contains top secret information about monsters! In this first book, Alexander goes up against spooky balloon goons--unique and twisted arm-waving balloon guys! This book is full of humor, engaging black-and-white illlustrations, and of course . . . monsters!

Fairest of All


Sarah Mlynowski - 2012
    . . Once upon a time my brother and I were normal kids. The next minute? The mirror in our basement slurped us up and magically transported us inside Snow White's fairy tale. I know it sounds crazy, but it's true.But hey -- we're heroes! We stopped Snow White from eating the poisoned apple. Hooray! Or not. If Snow White doesn't die, she won't get to meet her prince. And then she won't get her happy ending. Oops. Now it's up to us to:- Avoid getting poisoned- Sneak into a castle- Fix Snow White's storyBut Snow White's REAL happy ending might not be quite what we expected . . .

Treasure Hunters


James Patterson - 2013
    But after their parents disappear n the job, the kids are suddenly thrust into the biggest treasure hunt of their lives. They'll have to work together to defeat dangerous pirates and dodge the hot pursuit of an evil treasure hunting rival, all while following cryptic clues to unravel the mystery of what really happened to their parents--and find out if they're still alive.

The Mount Rushmore Calamity


Sara Pennypacker - 2009
    But when Flat Stanley and his brother, Arthur, team up with a scrappy cowgirl named Calamity Jasper, their vacation turns into the Wild West experience of a lifetime. Pretty soon, they find themselves in a real tight spot—even for a flat boy like Stanley!

Seuss-isms


Dr. Seuss - 1997
    Seuss have helped many a child (and grownup) along the complicated road of life. For those who need reminders, here is a collection of some of the good doctor's wisest and wittiest sayings, on subjects as varied as "Equality and Justice" and "Facing Up to Adversity" to "The Art of Eating" and "The First Nerd"! A perfect gift for all occasions, ideal for sharing among generations--now with a "gift tag" on the jacket flap for consumers to personalize!

School of Fear


Gitty Daneshvari - 1999
    Theodore Bartholomew is petrified of dying. Lulu Punchalower is scared of confined spaces. Garrison Feldman is terrified of deep water. With very few options left, the parents of these four twelve year-olds send them to the highly elusive and exclusive School of Fear to help them overcome their phobias. But when their peculiar teacher, Mrs. Wellington, and her unconventional teaching methods turn out to be more frightening than even their fears, the foursome realize that this just may be the scariest summer of their lives.

Next Top Villain


Suzanne Selfors - 2014
    While their personalities are very different, they bond over not quite fitting in with the other Royals. Lizzie, however, has one thing that Duchess doesn't: a happily-ever-after at the end of her story. While Lizzie and the other princesses train for the day when they will rule their kingdoms, Duchess is torn between her role as the perfect, dutiful princess and her rebellious ambition to be a queen. When both girls are selected to attend General Villainy class, Duchess sees an opportunity to be a rebel while following the rules. But can she play a prank on her roomie to ace the class? Find out if Duchess' desire to change her destiny will make her Ever After High's Next Top Villain!

Captain Nobody


Dean Pitchford - 2009
    When Chris is knocked into a coma, Newt's two best friends decide that taking him out for Halloween is the best way to cheer him up. Using some of Chris's old, oversized clothes, Newt creates his best costume ever?Captain Nobody! Newt feels so strong and confident in his new getup that he keeps wearing it after Halloween is over. In no time, Newt assumes the role of a hero in a string of exploits that include foiling a robbery and saving a planeload of passengers. But will Captain Nobody be able to save the one person he cares about most?With Captain Nobody, the acclaimed author of The Big One-Oh, Dean Pitchford, has skillfully crafted a heartfelt blend of action, humor, and family drama.

The Holly Joliday


Megan McDonald - 2007
    It hasn’t snowed on Christmas in Virginia in more than a hundred years, however, so what are the chances that that will change? Enter the new mailman, Mr. Jack Frost, who not only looks like a jolly old elf but also seems to know a lot about weather patterns, has a fondness for the cold, and works looooooong hours during the holiday season. Plus it’s the best time of the year, when strange packages and lots of surprises are swirling around, so isn’t it possible that Stink might get his wish? Fans who curl up with this new Moody comedy can be sure that their bellies will shake like a bowl full of jelly.

The Measly Middle Ages


Terry Deary - 1996
    "The Measly Middle Ages" portrays life as it really was in the days when knights were bold and the peasants were revolting.

We Are Not Eaten by Yaks


C. Alexander London - 2011
    They’d rather be watching television. Unfortunately for them, their thrill-seeking parents have dragged them from continent to continent their entire lives. But when their mother goes missing and their father makes a bet with the devious explorer Sir Edmund, the twins are forced into action. They head to Tibet where they fall out of airplanes, battle Yetis, poison witches, and encounter one very large yak.  If they can unravel the mysteries and outwit Sir Edmund, they might just make the discovery of a lifetime . . . and get cable television!

The Big Book of Silly Jokes for Kids: 800+ Jokes!


Carole P. Roman - 2019
    The jokes also get more challenging with each chapter, so this book will tickle funny bones of all ages.The Big Book of Silly Jokes for Kids is hysterical fun for anytime and anywhere: Are we there yet?—Keep kids engaged and giggling at home, on the road, and beyond. Reading frenzy—The best way to keep them reading? Make it so much fun they forget they’re reading. Budding comedian—Kids will learn about setups, punchlines, and how to write some jokes of their own. Keep them laughing and reading for hours with this massive book of jokes for kids.