When My Mind Wanders It Brings Back Souvenirs


Gordon Kirkland - 2005
    Kirkland is a master at finding the small hidden bits of humor in events that the rest of us might just as easily overlook. His goal with his writing has always been to let his readers laugh with him and at him, and by doing so, finding a way to laugh at themselves. His previous books have been called "a must-have for all of us who love to just sit back and laugh." This book follows that tradition.Recipient of the 2006 Stephen Leacock Award of Merit for Humour (Canada.)

Dad Is Fat


Jim Gaffigan - 2013
    Though he grew up in a large Irish-Catholic family, Jim was satisfied with the nomadic, nocturnal life of a standup comedian, and was content to be "that weird uncle who lives in an apartment by himself in New York that everyone in the family speculates about." But all that changed when he married and found out his wife, Jeannie "is someone who gets pregnant looking at babies."Five kids later, the comedian whose riffs on everything from Hot Pockets to Jesus have scored millions of hits on YouTube, started to tweet about the mistakes and victories of his life as a dad. Those tweets struck such a chord that he soon passed the million followers mark. But it turns out 140 characters are not enough to express all the joys and horrors of life with five kids, so hes' now sharing it all in Dad Is Fat.From new parents to empty nesters to Jim's twenty-something fans, everyone will recognize their own families in these hilarious takes on everything from cousins ("celebrities for little kids") to growing up in a big family ("I always assumed my father had six children so he could have a sufficient lawn crew") to changing diapers in the middle of the night ("like The Hurt Locker but much more dangerous") to bedtime (aka "Negotiating with Terrorists").Dad is Fat is sharply observed, explosively funny, and a cry for help from a man who has realized he and his wife are outnumbered in their own home.

Mamas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be A-holes: Unfiltered Advice on How to Raise Awesome Kids


Karen Alpert - 2021
    From the creator of Baby Sideburns and I Heart My Little A-Holes (and the creator of two kids who once were little a-holes but are slowly turning into awesome human beings), Mamas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be A-Holes is a hilariously honest parenting guide written by a regular mom who doesn’t always know WTF she’s doing. Just like you. Featuring side-splittingly funny pictures, stories, and chapters like:You Are Not Your Kiddo's Servant​Picasso's Mom Didn't Tell Him to Draw the Eyes in the Right PlaceSticks and Stones May Break My Bones But Words Will Cost Thousands in TherapyIf They Say "I Hate You," Then You're Probably Doing It RightMamas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be A-Holes will make you laugh, cry, laugh until you cry, and feel like you’re having coffee (and a little sumpin' in it) with a best friend who has some of the answers to THE hardest job on earth: parenting. And maybe, just maybe, it might help you get the a-hole out of your kids* *not a guarantee

The Broken Circle: A Memoir of Escaping Afghanistan


Enjeela Ahmadi-Miller - 2019
    But after her mother, unsettled by growing political unrest, leaves for medical treatment in India, the civil war intensifies, changing young Enjeela’s life forever. Amid the rumble of invading Soviet tanks, Enjeela and her family are thrust into chaos and fear when it becomes clear that her mother will not be coming home.Thus begins an epic, reckless, and terrifying five-year journey of escape for Enjeela, her siblings, and their father to reconnect with her mother. In navigating the dangers ahead of them, and in looking back at the wilderness of her homeland, Enjeela discovers the spiritual and physical strength to find hope in the most desperate of circumstances.A heart-stopping memoir of a girl shaken by the brutalities of war and empowered by the will to survive, The Broken Circle brilliantly illustrates that family is not defined by the borders of a country but by the bonds of the heart.

Couponing for the Beginner: A Guide to Couponing for the Uninitiated


Jenny Dean - 2012
    Such background knowledge will help you understand why couponing works for not only couponers but also the stores that accept them. You'll feel confident going into the store for your first real deal because of the well-rounded knowledge, couponing advice as well as the online coupon tips you will receive from Couponing for the Beginner: A Guide to Couponing for the Uninitiated. The sensible approach in Couponing for the Beginner: A Guide to Couponing for the Uninitiated will help you shop for free for some of your favorite items at some of your favorite stores like CVS, Rite Aid, Target, and Walgreens. You'll also learn how to find the best savings on items you use every day in your home - learn how to combine them with store sales and promotions, store rewards/loyalty programs, rebates and more.All you have to do is follow Dean's step-by-step guide that teaches you how to get stuff for free and you'll be shopping for free in no time. In fact, you'll be wondering why you didn't shop like this sooner!

The Grass Is Always Greener over the Septic Tank


Erma Bombeck - 1976
    It's the expose to end all exposes--the truth about the suburbs: where they planted trees and crabgrass came up, where they planted the schools and taxes came up, where they died of old age trying to merge onto the freeway and where they finally got sex out of the schools and back into the gutters.

Bastard Husband: A Love Story


Linda Lou - 2009
    (And I thought I had problems.) As I sat among a circle of strangers waiting for my turn to share, I glanced at the Absolutely No Swearing sign hanging from the ceiling and thought, This will be a challenge. Im Linda, I began, I have no husband, no job, and you people are my only friends. Everyone laughed at my pathetic truth." -- Linda Lou Bastard Husband: A Love Story is an autobiographical account of the author's first year alone in Las Vegas following a midlife divorce. Balancing poignancy and edgy humor, Linda Lou reflects on the troubled relationship that prompted this story and leads readers through a hodgepodge of emotions as vast as a Vegas buffet--from the sadness of a failed union and the questioning of her spiritual convictions to the thrill of exploring the Vegas neon nightlife and the triumph of performing stand-up comedy for the first time at age 46.

Waking Mathilda: A Memoir of Childhood Narcolepsy


Claire Crisp - 2017
    Then came the H1N1 flu pandemic of 2009. It took only vaccine—one seemingly innocuous vaccine to Mathilda, the baby of the family—to change their lives forever. Diagnosed at age three as the world's youngest child with narcolepsy, the joyful and energetic Mathilda rapidly dissolved into someone unrecognizable. In this compelling narrative, Claire Crisp chronicles the fight for Mathilda's treatment. Leaving their family and country in England, the Crisps begin a new journey—one of faith, of loss, and of love as immigrants to the western shores of the United States.

Rules for the Unruly: Living an Unconventional Life


Marion Winik - 2001
    Winik's amusing tales of outrageous mistakes, haunting uncertainty, and the never-ending struggle to stay true to her heart strike a powerful chord with creative, impassioned, independent-minded free spirits who know they're different -- and want to stay that way. Winik's seven Rules for the Unruly are: THE PATH IS NOT STRAIGHT · MISTAKES NEED NOT BE FATAL PEOPLE ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAN ACHIEVEMENTS OR POSSESSIONS BE GENTLE WITH YOUR PARENTS · NEVER STOP DOING WHAT YOU CARE ABOUT MOST LEARN TO USE A SEMICOLON · YOU WILL FIND LOVE Rules for the Unruly shows us how taking risks, living creatively, and cherishing our inner weirdness can become the secret of our happiness and success, not our downfall.

Stronger: Courage, Hope, and Humor in My Life with John McCain


Cindy Mccain - 2021
    

Don't Make Me Come Up There!: Quiet Moments for Busy Moms


Kristen Welch - 2010
    But she needs it. She needs the moment to refocus and refresh her soul. She needs the inspiration to find God in the mess and the mundane that often defines her. She craves the solitude of a moment with the Master to quiet the storms. She needs to laugh and remember why she loves being a mom.Don't Make Me Come Up There! is filled with inspirational and hilarious true-life stories and reflections written by a very human mom. Moms will recognize themselves in the pages of this book written for real, everyday mothers who know what it's like to catch vomit with one hand while starting a load of laundry with the other (and never confusing the two!). The fifty-two reflections encourage moms to revel in the everyday beauty of their lives and grow closer to God through it all."I couldn't help thinking of the last time my children had scattered up the stairs and disappeared into a quiet abyss. Initially, I thought they were just delighting in one another's company, holding hands, and making paper daisies. But that thought lasted for 1.2 seconds before I snapped out of my delusion only to discover my oldest giving her brother a "haircut" and my youngest smearing soap all over the bathroom. . . " from the book

Cry Into the Wind: A True Story


Othello Bach - 2005
    Othello's recount of her childhood, of the truck that was the only home she knew during the first six years of her life, the two-room shack that claimed her mother's life in a tragic fire, the abusive behavior of an alcoholic father, and the eleven long years she spent with her siblings at an Oklahoma orphanage, is captivating. Recording her memories in a simple yet touching style, Othello conveys strength of emotions that have been distilled and clarified over time. Cry Into the Wind is a story of triumph over adversity: a testimony to the strength of the American Spirit and a valuable source of inspiration for those struggling to overcome the effects of an abusive childhood.

Sleeping Solo: One Woman's Journey Into Life After Marriage


Audrey Faye - 2014
    It left little bits of brain and heart matter all over the walls, and the certain, irrevocable knowledge that my life had just radically changed shape forever. I’d been unceremoniously dumped out onto the road of a new journey. I expected it to be dusty and hard and short on food and water, a gut-wrenching endurance test that would take a long time to wind its way to ease and peace and a modicum of happiness. That’s not what happened at all. There have been hard days and dusty ones, and I do my best, in this missive from the road, to speak the truth of those moments. But the words clamoring at my door weren’t the dusty ones - they were the ones full of surprised pride in the journey that has actually happened instead. The ones full of abundance and purpose and happiness and the wild, bubbling need to dance. Yeah. Not what I expected from my post-marriage apocalypse either. Welcome to Sleeping Solo, my anthem song from the road. It's 17,000 words, or about 60 pages, and every one of them comes straight from my heart.

Home Game: An Accidental Guide to Fatherhood


Michael Lewis - 2009
    This book is that record. But it is also something else: maybe the funniest, most unsparing account of ordinary daily household life ever recorded, from the point of view of the man inside. The remarkable thing about this story isn’t that Lewis is so unusual. It’s that he is so typical. The only wonder is that his wife has allowed him to publish it.

Carry On, Warrior: Thoughts on Life Unarmed


Glennon Doyle Melton - 2013
    She believes that by shedding our armor, we can stop hiding, competing, striving for the mirage of perfection, and making motherhood, marriage, and friendship harder by pretending they’re not hard. In this one woman trying to love herself and others, readers find a wise and witty friend who will inspire them to forgive their own imperfections, make the most of their gifts, and commit to small acts of love that will change the world.