But one thing all of those campaigns—boringly!—had in common was: They abided by the physical laws of the universe! HELP FUND MY ROBOT ARMY!!! is an anthology of science fiction/fantasy stories told in the form of fictional crowdfunding project pitches, using the components (and restrictions) of the format to tell the story. This includes but is not limited to: Project Goals, Rewards, User Comments, Project Updates, FAQs, and more. The idea is to replicate the feel of reading a crowdfunding pitch, so that even though the projects may be preposterous in the real world, they will feel like authentic crowdfunding projects as much as possible.So if what you’ve always been looking for in a Kickstarter—and couldn’t find—was a project that allowed you to SUMMON DEMONS, DEFY GRAVITY, WIELD MAGIC, or VIOLATE CAUSALITY, then HELP FUND MY ROBOT ARMY!!! & Other Improbable Crowdfunding Projects may be just the thing you’ve been looking for.

    Satisfy your curiosity. Surrender to wonder. Witness as the finest talents of our time bring you tales of the strangeness at the edges of existence.Featuring: Clive Barker, John Langan, Neil Gaiman, Ramsey Campbell, Lisa Morton, Brian Kirk, Hal Bodner, Stephanie M. Wytovich, Erinn Kemper, John F.D. Taff, Patrick Freivald, Lucy Snyder, Brian Hodge, Kristi DeMeester, Christopher Coake, Sarah Read, and Richard Thomas. With a foreword by Josh Malerman.

    Read about Holmes and Watson through time and space, as they tackle a witch-trial in seventeenth century Scotland, bandy words with Andy Warhol in 1970s New York, travel the Wild Frontier in the Old West, solve future crimes in a world of robots and even cross paths with a young Elvis Presley... Set to include stories by Kasey Lansdale, Guy Adams, Jamie Wyman, J E Cohen, Gini Koch, Glen Mehn, Kelly Hale, Kaaron Warren, Emma Newman and more.

    From the ancient stone corridors of the labyrinth to the graffitied alleyways of the contemporary metropolis, they stalk the shadows. Leering from the darkness of the forest, jostling for space in our closets, they walk, crawl, creep and scuttle through our nightmares. Close as the clutter under the bed or the other side of the mirror, they are our truest companions.Creatures features the best monster fiction from the past thirty years, offering a wide variety of the best monster stories including original stories from the field's most relevant names and hottest newcomers including Clive Barker, Sarah Langan, Joe R. Lansdale, Kelly Link, China Miéville, and Cherie Priest.

    Contents:· The Silken-Swift · nv F&SF Nov ’53 · The Professor’s Teddy-Bear · ss Weird Tales Mar ’48 · Bianca’s Hands · ss Argosy (UK) May ’47 · Saucer of Loneliness · ss Galaxy Feb ’53 · The World Well Lost · ss Universe Jun ’53 · It Wasn’t Syzygy [“The Deadly Ratio”] · nv Weird Tales Jan ’48 · The Music · vi * · Scars · ss Zane Grey’s Western Magazine May ’49 · Fluffy · ss Weird Tales Mar ’47 · The Sex Opposite · nv Fantastic Fll ’52 · Die, Maestro, Die! · nv Dime Detective Magazine May ’49 · Cellmate · ss Weird Tales Jan ’47 · A Way of Thinking · nv Amazing Oct/Nov ’53

    Adopted by colleges across the country to be used in literature courses, The Dark Descent showcases some of the finest horror fiction ever written.Contents: Pt. 1 - The Color of EvilThe Reach / Stephen KingEvening Primrose / John CollierThe Ash-Tree / M. R. JamesThe New Mother / Lucy CliffordThere's a Long, Long Trail A-winding / Russell KirkThe Call of Cthulhu / H. P. LovecraftThe Summer People / Shirley JacksonThe Whimper of Whipped Dogs / Harlan EllisonYoung Goodman Brown / Nathaniel HawthorneMr. Justice Harbottle / J. Sheridan Le FanuThe Crowd / Ray BradburyThe Autopsy / Michael SheaJohn Charrington's Wedding / E. NesbitSticks / Karl Edward WagnerLarger Than Oneself / Robert AickmanBelsen Express / Fritz LeiberYours Truly, Jack the Ripper / Robert BlochIf Damon Comes / Charles L. GrantVandy, Vandy / Manly Wade WellmanPt. 2 - The Medusa in the ShieldThe Swords / Robert AickmanThe Roaches / Thomas M. DischBright Segment / Theodore SturgeonDread / Clive BarkerThe Fall of the House of Usher / Edgar Allan PoeThe Monkey / Stephen KingWithin the Walls of Tyre / Michael BishopThe Rats in the Walls / H. P. LovecraftSchalken the Painter / J. Sheridan Le FanuThe Yellow Wallpaper / Charlotte Perkins GilmanA Rose for Emily / William FaulknerHow Love Came to Professor Guildea / Robert HichensBorn of Man and Woman / Richard MathesonMy Dear Emily / Joanna RussYou Can Go Now / Dennis EtchisonThe Rocking-Horse Winner / D. H. LawrenceThree Days / Tanith LeeGood Country People / Flannery O'ConnorMackintosh Willy / Ramsey CampbellThe Jolly Corner / Henry JamesPt. 3 - A Fabulous Formless Darkness Smoke Ghost / Fritz LeiberSeven American Nights / Gene WolfeThe Signal-Man / Charles DickensCrouch End / Stephen KingNight-Side / Joyce Carol OatesSeaton's Aunt / Walter de la MareClara Militch / Ivan TurgenevThe Repairer of Reputations / Robert W. ChambersThe Beckoning Fair One / Oliver OnionsWhat Was It? / Fitz-James O'BrienThe Beautiful Stranger / Shirley JacksonThe Damned Thing / Ambrose BierceAfterward / Edith WhartonThe Willows / Algernon BlackwoodThe Asian Shore / Thomas M. DischThe Hospice / Robert AickmanA Little Something for Us Tempunauts / Philip K. Dick

    When the United States Supreme Court rules that implanted individuals are no longer a protected class, Owen's life is changed forever, as he discovers that his implant has a very dangerous secret.

    The Abernathys don't mean any harm by their flirtation with the underworld, but when they unknowingly call forth Satan himself, they create a gap in the universe. A gap in which a pair of enormous gates is visible. The gates to Hell. And there are some pretty terrifying beings just itching to get out...Can one small boy defeat evil? Can he harness the power of science, faith, and love to save the world as we know it?Bursting with imagination, The Gates is about the pull between good and evil, physics and fantasy. It is about a quirky and eccentric boy who is impossible not to love, and the unlikely cast of characters who give him the strength to stand up to a demonic power.John Connolly manages to re-create the magical and scary world of childhood that we've all left behind but so love to visit. And for those of you who thought you knew everything you could about particle physics and the universe, think again. This novel makes anything seem possible.

    But with the master storyteller Josh Malerman as your tour guide, you'll discover the secrets that hide behind its closed doors. These six novellas tell the story of a place where the rain is always falling, nighttime is always near, and your darkest fears and desires await. Welcome to Goblin. . . .A Man in Slices: A man proves his "legendary love" to his girlfriend with a sacrifice even more daring than Vincent van Gogh's--and sends her more than his heart.Kamp: Walter Kamp is afraid of everything, but most afraid of being scared to death. As he sets traps around his home to catch the ghosts that haunt him, he learns that nothing is more terrifying than fear itself.Happy Birthday, Hunter!: A famed big-game hunter is determined to capture--and kill--the ultimate prey: the mythic Great Owl who lives in Goblin's dark forests. But this mysterious creature is not the only secret the woods are keeping.Presto: All Peter wants is to be like his hero, Roman Emperor, the greatest magician in the world. When the famous magician comes to Goblin, Peter discovers that not all magic is just an illusion.A Mix-Up at the Zoo: The new zookeeper feels a mysterious kinship with the animals in his care . . . and finds that his work is freeing dark forces inside him.The Hedges: When his wife dies, a man builds a hedge maze so elaborate no one ever solves it--until a little girl resolves to be the first to find the mysteries that wait at its heart.

    . . and it’s on the brink of breaking out of the computers and into the real world.

    Certain to appeal to role-playing gamers, fantasy lovers, and megalomaniacs who want to rule the world.

    Most victims die, others experience physical or psychic changes: aces have useful powers, deuces minor maybe entertaining abilities, jokers uglified, disabled, relegated to ghettos.

    Their aircraft had begun to crash at an alarming rate, and no one could figure out what was going wrong. Desperate for an answer, they turned to Waldo, the crippled genius who lived in a zero-g home in orbit around Earth.But Waldo had little reason to want to help the rest of humanity — until he learned that the solution to their problems also held the key to his own...Magic, Inc.Under the guise of an agency for magicians, Magic, Inc. was systematically squeezing out the small independent magicians. Then one businessman stood firm. With the help of an Oxford-educated African shaman and a little old lady adept at black magic, he went straight to the demons of Hell to resolve the problem — once and for all!

    A number of wonderful fantasy novels, including Stardust by Neil Gaiman, Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell by Susanna Clarke, and The Prestige by Christopher Priest, owe their inspiration to works by nineteenth-century writers ranging from Jane Austen, the Brontës, and George Meredith to Charles Dickens, Anthony Trollope, and William Morris. And, of course, the entire steampunk genre and subculture owes more than a little to literature inspired by this period.Queen Victoria’s Book of Spells is an anthology for everyone who loves these works of neo-Victorian fiction, and wishes to explore the wide variety of ways that modern fantasists are using nineteenth-century settings, characters, and themes. These approaches stretch from steampunk fiction to the Austen-and-Trollope inspired works that some critics call Fantasy of Manners, all of which fit under the larger umbrella of Gaslamp Fantasy. The result is eighteen stories by experts from the fantasy, horror, mainstream, and young adult fields, including both bestselling writers and exciting new talents such as Elizabeth Bear, James Blaylock, Jeffrey Ford, Ellen Kushner, Tanith Lee, Gregory Maguire, Delia Sherman, and Catherynne M. Valente, who present a bewitching vision of a nineteenth century invested (or cursed!) with magic.The Line-up:“Queen Victoria’s Book of Spells” by Delia Sherman“The Fairy Enterprise” by Jeffrey Ford“From the Catalogue of the Pavilion of the Uncanny and Marvelous, Scheduled for Premiere at the Great Exhibition (Before the Fire)” by Genevieve Valentine“The Memory Book” by Maureen McHugh“La Reine D’Enfer” by Kathe Koja“Briar Rose” by Elizabeth Wein“The Governess” by Elizabeth Bear“Smithfield” by James P. Blaylock“The Unwanted Women of Surrey” by Kaaron Warren“Charged” by Leanna Renee Hieber“Mr. Splitfoot” by Dale Bailey“Phosphorus” by Veronica Schanoes“We Without Us Were Shadows” by Catherynne M. Valente“The Vital Importance of the Superficial” by Ellen Kushner and Caroline Stevermer“The Jewel in the Toad Queen’s Crown” by Jane Yolen“A Few Twigs He Left Behind” by Gregory Maguire“Their Monstrous Minds” by Tanith Lee“Estella Saves the Village” by Theodora Goss

    What's the seating plan when rival clans of werewolves and vampires meet under the same roof? How can a couple in the throes of love overcome traps set by feuding relatives---who are experts at voodoo? Will you have a good marriage if your high-seas wedding is held on a cursed ship? How do you deal with a wedding singer who's just a little too good at impersonating Elvis? Shape-shifters, wizards, and magic, oh my!"The Wedding of Wylda Serene" / Esther Friesner"All Shook Up" /P.N. Elrod"Tacky" / Charlaine Harris"A Hard Day's Night-Searcher" / Sherrilyn Kenyon"Something Borrowed" / Jim Butcher"Spellbound" / L.A. Banks"Dead Man's Chest" / Rachel Caine"Charmed by the Moon" / Lori Handeland"...Or Forever Hold Your Peace" / Susan Krinard