Existential Kink: Unmask Your Shadow and Embrace Your Power (A method for getting what you want by getting off on what you don't)


Carolyn Elliott - 2020
    The dark side of our personality—the “other,” the shadow side—is made up of what we think is our primitive, primal, negative impulses—our “existential kink.” Our existential kink also drives the dark or negative repeating patterns in our life: always choosing the abusive partner or boss, settling for less, thinking that we’re undeserving, not worthy. But it also is the source of our greatest power.In Existential Kink, Carolyn Elliott, PhD, offers a truth-telling guide for bringing our shadow into the light. Inviting us to make conscious the unconscious, Elliott asks us to own the subconscious pleasure we get from the stuck, painful patterns of our existence.Existential Kink provides practical advice and meditations so we truly see our shadow side’s “guilty pleasures,” love and accept them, and integrate them into our whole being. By doing so, Elliott shows, we bring to life the raw, hot, glorious power we all have to get what we really want in our lives.

How to Fix a Broken Heart


Guy Winch - 2018
    We think of nothing else. We feel nothing else. We care about nothing else. Yet while we wouldn’t expect someone to return to daily activities immediately after suffering a broken limb, heartbroken people are expected to function normally in their lives, despite the emotional pain they feel. Now psychologist Guy Winch imagines how different things would be if we paid more attention to this unique emotion—if only we can understand how heartbreak works, we can begin to fix it.Through compelling research and new scientific studies, Winch reveals how and why heartbreak impacts our brain and our behavior in dramatic and unexpected ways, regardless of our age. Emotional pain lowers our ability to reason, to think creatively, to problem solve, and to function at our best. In How to Fix a Broken Heart he focuses on two types of emotional pain—romantic heartbreak and the heartbreak that results from the loss of a cherished pet. These experiences are both accompanied by severe grief responses, yet they are not deemed as important as, for example, a formal divorce or the loss of a close relative. As a result, we are often deprived of the recognition, support, and compassion afforded to those whose heartbreak is considered more significant.Our heart might be broken, but we do not have to break with it. Winch reveals that recovering from heartbreak always starts with a decision, a determination to move on when our mind is fighting to keep us stuck. We can take control of our lives and our minds and put ourselves on the path to healing. Winch offers a toolkit on how to handle and cope with a broken heart and how to, eventually, move on.

Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of Every Healthy Relationship


Debra K. Fileta - 2020
    But depending on how you navigate each season, your relationship will either strengthen and grow, or it will slowly begin to fade.    Maybe your relationship is in the first blooms of spring, when friendship takes root and attraction blossoms.   Maybe you’re in the season of summer, and things are starting to heat up—spiritually, emotionally, and physically.   Maybe you’re deep in fall, and your true colors are starting to shine through.   Or maybe you’re in winter, when the passion cools down and it would be all too easy to let the relationship freeze over.   Whether you’re single, dating, engaged or married, join author, counselor, and relationship expert Debra Fileta, creator of TrueLoveDates.com, as she takes you on an eye-opening psychological and spiritual journey through the four seasons of every healthy relationship. You’ll learn to…Recognize each season as it comes and navigate it with intention, focus, and practical steps.Avoid the pitfalls of each stage by preparing for the hard moments and seeing them as opportunities to grow and connect. Celebrate not just the magical moments of each season, but the day-to-day choices that pave the way for a lasting relationship.No matter what your relationship status, you’re invited on a journey to strengthen and grow your love in every season.

It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken: The Smart Girl's Break-Up Buddy


Greg Behrendt - 2005
    Greg and his wife, Amiira, share their hilarious and helpful roadmap for getting past the heartache and back into the game. From Greg Behrendt, the co-author of the smash two-million copy bestseller He's Just Not That Into You, comes It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken.There's no doubt about it--breakups suck. But in the first few hours or days or weeks that follow, there's one important truth you need to recognize: Some things can't and shouldn't be fixed, especially that loser who dumped you or forced you to dump him. Starting right here, right now, it's time to dry your tears, and open this book to Chapter One-and start turning your breakup into a breakover.The ultimate survival guide to getting over Mr. Wrong and reclaiming your inner Superfox. From how to put yourself through "he-tox," to how to throw yourself a kick-ass pity party, and reframing reality-- seeing the relationship for what it was. Complete with an essential workbook to help you put your emotions down on paper and heal.

Intellectual Foreplay: A Book of Questions for Lovers and Lovers-to-Be


Eve Eschner Hogan - 2000
    The book provides readers with: enhanced knowledge of their own and their partners' beliefs, values, habits, desires, goals, likes, and dislikes; ideas for opening communication and deepening a relationship; skills for making healthy decisions about lifestyles and boundaries; an in-depth understanding of the role of self-esteem in relationships; increased ability to let go of the past and embrace the present; and the knowledge that it is important not only to choose the right partner, but also to be the right partner. What distinguishes Intellectual Foreplay from similar titles is that it includes guidelines on what to do with the answers it gives. This makes it useful in both creating and sustaining a relationship.