Meet Bridget and Joan: Thelma and Louise on mobility scooters, reluctant residents of the Second Best Magnolia Retirement Home, and lifelong friends joined at the artificial hip.It’s been a wild year for the two rebellious wrinkletons: sherry and shoplifting, Sanatogen and sexting, and a mysterious toy boy who threatens their lifelong friendship and possibly even more…

    Packed full of zingers and hilarious illustrations, if this doesn't put a smile on your face, nothing will. What's not to like:The other day someone left a piece of plasticine in my dressing room. I didn't know what to make of it. I'm against hunting. I'm actually a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox. I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah. He was trying to pull a fast one. Black holes. I don't know what people see in them. So I fancied a game of darts with my mate. He said, 'Nearest the bull goes first.' He went 'Baah' and I went 'Moo'. He said 'You're closest.' Velcro. What a rip-off. Black Beauty. He's a dark horse. I've got a sponge front door. Hey, don't knock it.

    

    And why, at Christmas, she wrote lengthy letters to Santa (note: letters, plural) begging him not to bring any surprises. Change was the enemy. But, as it turns out, one Stefanie hasn't been able to avoid. And, in spite of herself, one she has sometimes invited into her life.Here, in her first book, Stefanie looks at the ways in which her life has changed. From birthdays, friendships and how she celebrates the festive season, to social media (no FOMO here), the importance of asking WWNSD? (What Would Nicole Scherzinger Do?) when faced with big decisions, and her career as a writer, Why Can't Everything Just Stay the Same? is the hilarious and honest account of one woman's journey to and through adulthood, coping (sort of) with the terror, inevitability and beauty of change. 'It's Stefanie's life, but her struggles are universal. Insecurity? Check. Anger? Check. Weight issues? Big fat check. Stefanie shines a light on human frailty and human strength, proving they are not opposites, but often walk hand-in-hand ... an inspiring, thoroughly enjoyable book.' Nell Scovell, creator of Sabrina the Teenage Witch and author of Just the Funny Parts

    It's belly-laughing funny but it's also a hymn to the grand and complex game delivered with a narrative pace and ability I'm afraid most Test players don't have. For anyone who ever dreamed of excelling at a sport but never quite made it but still gave it your life, this is the story. A great read!' Tom Keneally'The Grade Cricketer has taken us so far inside a district club dressing room that you feel like a locker. Ligaments could not be closer to the bone than some of his observations.' Kerry O'Keeffe 'The Grade Cricketer is strange and, I suspect, brilliant'. Wisden

    56 pages of chapter summaries, quotes, character analysis, themes, and more – everything you need to sharpen your knowledge of The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove. This detailed literature summary also contains Topics for Discussion and a Free Quiz on The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove by Christopher Moore.

    Sam Hunt faces up to the big three-o, and begins to feel that it might just be the beginning of the end.

    You can pick up any volume that interests you, as there is no story you need to follow from one volume to the next. Highlights of this volume include: Things first responders wish they would have learned in school/training, hilarious conversations readers have overheard, the miracle that occurred when a child choked, strange things patients have requested of EMS, and times first responders realized they weren't dealing with the sharpest tools in the shed. These stories have been submitted by people just like you: patients, EMS, techs, receptionists, physicians, dentists, veterinarians, LEOs, and other healthcare professionals/first responders.

    A Long Distance Relationship Story in the backdrop of an engineering college.Few Details:1) PROXY: Filled for five friends but forgot one's own2) VIVA: Smoked and drunk but still cracked it3) Group Discussion: Topic- 'Woman on the Top'4) DROPOUT: Still invited as a motivational speaker at his collegePLOT:Neil met Avani-the girl who saved him from committing suicide few years back.Soon they were connected through Facebook.On day one, she revealed her plan to leave India for higher studies.But still their conversation continued.He told her about his college life while she talked about her friends.One day, he surprised her by dropping to her place and professing his love.What will Avani do now?

    writes with humor, dripping Southern charm that you can’t miss.” (The Greenville Examiner). A collection of short stories from the author of Sean of the South, and Lyla. Columnist, humorist, and novelist, Sean Dietrich, is known for his commentary on life in the American South. In his newest work, Small Towns, Labradors, Barbecue, Biscuits, Beer, and Bibles, he delivers a set of quirky tales filled with smiles and a hefty dose of heart.

    Apparently it’s fine for Scrimshaw Travel to make last minute amendments to the holiday without incurring any penalties or reducing the price in any way. That’s what the indifferent courier tells him on day one of the tour as she arrives in a clapped-out, old coach being driven by a partially-sighted driver. With the spa hotel replaced by a rundown guest house staffed by a neurotic manager, decrepit waitress and under-sexed, Italian waiter there doesn’t appear to be much of the brochure-described holiday left. Thank goodness for Angela, the rather lovely woman Derek pals up with on the journey down. She might just make the trip bearable. If only the other members of the group would leave them alone long enough to get to know each other, but Derek has always had the ability to attract the eccentric characters to him and he can’t escape them. Still, perhaps they’ll surprise him as he learns about their lives and secrets as they move from one hilarious excursion to another. And maybe Angela will provide one or two surprises herself. Driven to Distraction is a fun romp through the English countryside with characters finding love and friendship while travelling at twenty miles an hour. (Well, it is a clapped-out, old coach).

     Do you constantly get anxious about your health and seek reassurance? Have you found yourself analysing every single sensation in your body? Are you spending time on the internet always looking for answers? Do you have heart palpatations that make you think you're having a heart attack? Does that impending heart attack give you a panic attack? Are you still not dead? You can rest assured it's not just you! Philip Martins was once a hypochondriac and has survived, among other things, cancer, motor neurone disease, meningitis, multiple sclerosis and having been bitten by a mosquito once, malaria. In this book he tells you how he got through his years of health anxiety, provides some anecdotes of his crazier times to cheer you up and gives you some tips all in the hope that it can bring a little relief to help you realise you're not alone. If you have health anxiety and are looking for something to relate to then this is the book for you.

    Everything Mark's not, Paris is a man of the world with a thirst for adventure - even his name is better than Mark's.But after a catastrophic argument, Mark finds himself setting off alone on his voyage, instead emailing an unresponsive Paris from the road. A cocktail cruise on the Seine, mindful pastry making in Foix, a graffiti tour in Barcelona: Mark will be forced to engage with life and strangers as he never has before, with poignantly recognisable results.But questions remain: will he ever be able to have an authentic interaction? Will Paris ever reply to his emails? And crucially, will he manage to write SEO friendly copy for every place he visits?After all, it's not the destination that counts: it's the homes and experiences you encounter along the way.

    signed books

     Jeremy Clovenhoof has spent six years living the quiet life after losing his job as Lord of Hell and now he’s partying hard because it’s the school holidays. Whether it’s his increasingly complex girlfriend situation, his creative attempts at Christmas on a budget or an over-decorated tree that will take things very personally, Clovenhoof will make this a Christmas for everybody to remember. Join Clovenhoof as he continues his year-long journey to tackle the big issues in life.