Stoned, Naked, and Looking in My Neighbor's Window: The Best Confessions from Grouphug.Us
Gabriel Jeffrey - 2004
This collection gathers some of the best of the confessions that have been posted.
Didn't My Skin Used to Fit?
Martha Bolton - 2000
That's what she provides readers with in this humorous, insightful book on life after 40. With such chapters as "When Your Blood's Too Tired to Bleed" and "Roughage by Candlelight", readers will love it.
The Daily Struggles of Archie Adams: Aged 2¼
Katie Kirby - 2018
Life is hard for Archie. It often seems like the world is out to get him. People are always telling him what to do... "Eat your snack, Archie!, "Don't lick the bus stop, Archie," "Stop putting Mommy's phone in the garbage, Archie!"An then one day his heart is shattered when he learns his parents are to replace him with a younger sibling--the utter bastards!The only comforts he finds are in his best friend Amelie, who teaches him all the good swear words, and the sweet relief he gets from sinking his teeth into other people's limbs.From naked protests to dealing with other people looking at YOUR THINGS!, this is a no-holds-barred account of life told through the eyes of Archie--a creatively stifled, modern day toddler.Sunday Times bestseller Hurrah for Gin has delighted fans with its honest, emotional and laugh-out-loud accounts of parenting. Brilliantly illustrated with Katie Kirby's unique stick-figure drawings and told in the same outrageously funny way, The Daily Struggles of Archie Adams, Aged 2 1/4 once again takes on the highs and lows of family life, this time with one opinionated toddler having his say.
Onesie Bunny Girls Amigurumi Crochet Pattern
Sayjai Thawornsupacharoen - 2017
The dolls are 3.5 inches (9 cm) tall.Materials required:3.00 mm hook;DK, Light Worsted yarn;Polyester fiberfill;Tapestry needle;5 mm black beads for eyes : 2 beads for each doll;Needle and black thread for attaching eyes.
Booky Wook Collection
Russell Brand - 2014
The bloke can write. He rhapsodizes about heroin better than anyone since Jim Carroll. With the flick of his enviable pen, he can summarize childhood thus: ‘My very first utterance in life was not a single word, but a sentence. It was, ‘Don’t do that.’... Russell Brand has a compelling story." — New York Times Book ReviewThe gleeful and candid New York Times bestselling autobiography of addiction, recovery, and rise to fame from Russell Brand, star of Forgetting Sarah Marshall and one of the biggest personalities in comedy today.Picking up where he left off in My Booky Wook, movie star and comedian Russell Brand details his rapid climb to fame and fortune in a shockingly candid, resolutely funny, and unbelievably electrifying tell-all: Booky Wook 2. Brand’s performances in Arthur, Get Him to the Greek, and Forgetting Sarah Marshall have earned him a place in fans’ hearts; now, with a drop of Chelsea Handler’s Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang, a dash of Tommy Lee’s Dirt, and a spoonful of Nikki Sixx’s The Heroin Diaries, Brand goes all the way—exposing the mad genius behind the audacious comic we all know (or think we know) and love (or at least, lust).
Crazy True Tales - A funny book for adults: Anecdotes and hilarious true stories. For the coffee table, bathroom or as a conversation starter (Crazy True Stories and Anecdotes)
Adam Douglas - 2021
Running: Cheaper Than Therapy: A Celebration of Running
Chas Newkey-Burden - 2017
Written by a Telegraph and Guardian journalist and self-confessed running nut, this smartly packaged and brilliantly knowing miscellany details entertaining, real-life runners' stories (being overtaken by a kid/OAP or getting lost while training) and takes a humorous look at the mistakes runners make (wearing a brand new pair of trainers for half marathon or getting so pumped by your morning run you have arguments with everyone at work).
Undertaking Irene
Pamela Burford - 2014
To dead people.Life gets complicated for Jane and her Death Diva business when she’s hired to liberate a gaudy mermaid brooch from the corpse during a wake—on behalf of the rightful owner, supposedly. Well, a girl’s got to make a living, and this assignment pays better than scattering ashes, placing flowers on graves, or bawling her eyes out as a hired mourner. Unfortunately for Jane, someone else is just as eager to get his hands on that brooch, and he’s even sneakier than she is, not to mention dangerously sexy.Just when she thinks her biggest problem is grand theft mermaid, things take a murderous turn. But hey, when you’ve teamed up with a neurotic seven-pound poodle named Sexy Beast, how can you go wrong?
How to Stay Bitter Through the Happiest Times of Your Life
Anita Liberty - 2006
But I wrote a lot of good poems.”So maintains Anita Liberty, the caustically funny New York City performance artist who was going along happily healing her hurt by hating and humiliating her detestable ex-boyfriend on stage and in print until the unthinkable happened: she had a good date. And one good date deserves another. And another. And another. And, all of the sudden, Anita Liberty finds herself in a predicament. Getting dumped launched Anita’s career–Will falling in love finish it? Who’s more important: her devoted audience or her newly devoted boyfriend? And on top of everything, Hollywood won’t stop calling and Anita can’t figure out if It wants a serious commitment or just a little bit of no-strings-attached fun. From digging mercilessly into the minutiae of her new relationship to dramatically torching every professional bridge she crosses in L.A., Anita refuses to let a big load of bliss get dumped right in the middle of her career path.“He said that my work was amazing and hilarious and smart and that he can’t wait to see me perform.So I had sex with him.”“My boyfriend asked me to change my look.To something other than contemptuous.”{BARGAIN} Whatever Hollywood ends up paying me for the rights to the story of my life.“It’s easier to go back to fantasizing about perfection . . .than to accept that perfection is just a fantasy.”“Boyfriend thinks I’d rather be right than happy.Boyfriend’s right.But I’m not telling him that.”Through blog entries, film scenes, poems, and to-do lists, Anita Liberty documents the perils and pitfalls of dating, sex, relationships, artistic success, and the kind of true love that sucks the creative life out of you to the point where you just end up staring at a blank computer screen and thinking gooey thoughts about your new boyfriend even though you should be writing.
Fry's Ties: Discover the life and ties of Stephen Fry
Stephen Fry - 2021
Wodehouse ________ Every single one of Stephen Fry's ties - whether floral, fluorescent, football themed; striped or spotty, outrageous or simply debonair - tells an intimate tale about a moment in Stephen's life. Inspired by Stephen's hugely popular Instagram posts, this book will feature beautiful, hand-drawn illustrations and photographs to celebrate his expansive collection of man's greatest clothing companion: The Tie, in all its sophisticated glory. Distinctively funny and offering witty asides, facts and personal stories, this book will make the perfect gift for anyone who has ever worn a tie.
The Jewish Joke: A Short History - With Punchlines
Devorah Baum - 2017
This smart and funny book includes tales from many of these much-loved comics, and will appeal to their broad audience, while revealing the history, context and wider culture of Jewish joking.The Jewish joke is as old as Abraham, and like the Jews themselves it has wandered over the world, learned countless new languages, worked with a range of different materials, been performed in front of some pretty hostile crowds, and yet still retained its own distinctive identity. So what is it that animates the Jewish joke? Why are Jews so often thought of as ‘funny’? And how old can a joke get?The Jewish Joke is a brilliant—and laugh-out-loud funny—riff on about what marks Jewish jokes apart from other jokes, why they are important to Jewish identity and how they work. Ranging from self-deprecation to anti-Semitism, politics to sex, Devorah Baum looks at the history of Jewish joking and asks whether the Jewish joke has a future. With jokes from Lena Dunham to Woody Allen, as well as Freud and Marx (Groucho, mostly), Baum balances serious research with light-hearted humor and provides fascinating insight into this well-known and much loved cultural phenomenon.
Time Travel Romance - Medieval Love: Reunited by Dagger Heart Spell
Nina Moon - 2013
Smith. The latest assignment request presented to her from Mr. Smith, is the request to retrieve a man's heart. Once this revelation is disclosed, Elise has serious reservations and declines the assignment, that is until her employer Mr. Smith assures her that it is not for the retrieval of an actual human heart, and that the assignment pays a generous commission fee of two million dollars.Against all her better judgement and intuition, Elise accepts the assignment, where she finds herself suddenly wrapped up in a bizarre set of circumstances. She questions both her sanity, as well as whether or not her mysterious employer Mr. Smith has set her up against her will to participate in some strange time travel experiment.The assignment goes terribly wrong, and Elise finds herself being held captive by a pair who act as if they are living in a different era, and feed her a time travel story dating back one thousand years ago that they are convinced Elise was a part of. Elise begins to question whether she's being fed mind-altering drugs during her captivity in order to play along with the pair's outlandish timetravel scheme, until a series of incidents start to trigger an overwhelming feeling of deja vu.With two failed escape attempts, Elise is mentally frustrated and physically weakened, and to make matters worse, she finds herself strangely drawn to her captor Mr. Andris Blackstone, the very same man who had commissioned her services through her employer Mr. Smith.Desperate to be released, Elise makes a deal with Mr. Andris Blackstone. His request is simple, and if she complies, he will allow her to leave, along with the full two million dollars she was promised. Things don't go quite as Elise had planned, and a memory from one thousand years ago is suddenly returned to her, along with something else she certainly wasn't expecting. A time travel romance and a return of something so sacred, it took the clandestine efforts of those she knew in a previous lifetime to fulfill.Chapter 1: Assignment of the HeartChapter 2: Manor MissionChapter 3: Meet Lord BlackstoneChapter 4: No EscapeChapter 5: RevelationsChapter 6: Silver Box
How to Talk to Spirits: The Beginners Guide For Reuniting With Your Loved One's on the Other Side
Michael Martin - 2014
What happens to our loved one's after they die Is it possible to communicate with the dead? What is an ADC or after death communication? Are they COMMON......or if I've had one, am I just going nuts? Can meditation or prayer help my deceased family communicate with me? If so.....HOW so and what are some of the best meditations for talking to our loved ones after they've crossed? If any of these questions are familiar.......in this brand new book written for the recently bereaved, Michael Martin, well known empath and author tackles some of the BIG questions about the afterlife, and some of the EASIEST timeless techniques that average people can use to get PERSONAL PROOF that life doesn't end at death.
What The Pandemic Learned From Me
Anindita Das - 2021
A journey of self-realization and renewed assessment of our lives, marked by silly anecdotes, mindless distractions, and everyday truths. This book is a humorous retelling of the author’s personal blunders and mind-boggling human behavior in general, strung together by a series of hilarious open letters. It is a modest pursuit to deliver a little relief, and diversion from the pandemic’s grim realities. It’s also an attempt to reaffirm the need for a good laugh to help deal with the doom and gloom that now surrounds our lives. Each letter picks up a relatable theme of our lockdown life – be it our obsession with baking banana bread, growing out our beards, or finding the fanciest holiday homes in Goa. What comes out, is a light and delightful offering that anyone living in this era shouldn’t miss. “A breezy read that goes well with your evening tea (like Marie Gold) or finds a permanent spot on your nightstand. A perfect picker-upper if you're feeling down, it reminded me of Bill Bryson's 'A Short History of Nearly Everything' and Hugh Prather's 'Notes to Myself'.”- Manish Bhatt, Founder/CCO August Communications“Hits a cord with everyone who has left the rat race of ‘acquiring new skills’. It is honest, straightforward, and downright hilarious. I loved the book. I found it clutter-breaking, relatable and non-preachy.” - Shilpi Agarwal, Blogger @bookgasmicSome important information:o The book is part memoir, part random lists and part mean musings.o It celebrates the ability to find humor in unexpected predicaments and life in general.o It’s a collection of letters addressed to the most unlikely of receivers, filled with pithy observations, irreverent and ruthless humor about the little idiosyncrasies of life in lockdown.o Each of these perfectly bite sized letters are wonderful accompaniments to the massive mood swings that is our reality in the times of corona.o Under no circumstance, this book is to be taken seriously, seriously.Savor this quick pick-me-up with a hot cup, a pinch of salt and a great deal of grins."
Gorgeous Georgians Activity Book
Terry Deary - 2005
Twelve classic Horrible Histories are being reissued with a tie-in cover. In Gorgeous Georgians readers can discover thehe full story: Gangs who made a living selling dead bodies. Husbands who sold their wives at auction. Doctors who cured toothache with squashed fish eyes. Join Rattus Rattus and the gang for the funniest, fastest, nastiest and daftest ride through histor you're ever likely to see..