However, when James Aden takes up the position of Deputy Agent he does not realise the full extent of what the job entails.He finds himself spending his days negotiating with royalty, farmers, and even wildlife, as well as the imperious Lady Leghorn. In order to survive, James must come to terms with his role quickly, and not let himself get too distracted by Sophie, the pre-college assistant.

    Whether it's disappointing a skydiving instructor mid-flight, hiding from thugs in a bush wearing a bright red dress, or annoying the Kettering Board Games club, a didgeridoo-playing conspiracy theorist and some bemused Christians, James is always finding new ways to embarrass himself.Appearing on Josh Widdicombe's radio show to recount these stories, the feature was christened 'James Acaster's classic scrapes'. Here, in his first book, James recounts these tales (including never-before-heard stories) along with self-penned drawings, in all their glorious stupidity.

    I could not trust even my closest friends to do the job for me. I was worried that they might try to sell you a lie. I feared that they might come up with some words like “James is an above average runner” or worse still, “James is actually quite good at this running thing”. I am not. But I have run across America, 3200 miles in ten weeks during the worst heat wave in living memory. Not many people have done that. I have run in many amazing places over really long distances. Ernest Hemmingway said “there is no skill to writing, you just have to sit at the typewriter and bleed”. That has been my approach to both my running and my writing. I am not sure Churchill had ultra running in mind when he famously quoted his qualifications but that is all I have to offer you here: no skill or talent just blood, sweat, toil and tears smeared over 350 pages and six years. This is not a treatise on how to achieve ultra marathon awesomeness. It is an honest account of what ultra marathon running does to a person. I sincerely hope you don’t finish reading this book with the opinion that I am any good at this. I hope you don’t describe me as being “super human “ or “crazy” or other terms I have grown used to over the years. Instead, my goal is that you might complete the fourth line of this series of logical statements in a similar way to the way that I did at the start of this journey: 1. James is a pretty regular guy 2. He’s done some amazing stuff 3.I’m a pretty regular guy/girl 4. -

    A low-ranking TV personality. Rather immature and carefree, my only responsibility to date has been a guinea pig. All that's about to change. I'm pregnant, and now I've become a cheddar cheese junkie, inseparable from my dungarees. Help!' Who can Mel turn to? Pen, her best friend, who is still annoyingly carefree and single, and whose effect on Mel is like an injection of pure caffeine to the system? Jools, the hippy who recommends basil nosegay for labour pains and placenta pate canapes when entertaining? Amanda, the well-heeled, pregnant-friend-from-Hell who, only weeks after her textbook delivery, is planning to have her firstborn taught to ski? Kate, Mel's sister and mother of two, whose offspring are inclined towards dangerous Captain Hook impersonations and sudden mood swings? Mel's mother, who got Mel through babyhood by way of regular coffee mornings and who impresses on her the importance of portable 1950s baby gear that looks about as foldable as a Transit van? Dan, the dad-to-be, who suddenly stops going to the pub to concentrate on Mel's dietary requirements and has adopted the sinister habit of always keeping a tape measure attached to his belt?

    But now she has to find a caterer who doesn't charge a fortune for a cupcake, a dressmaker who doesn't make her cry and a way to bring Great Auntie Betty down from Dundee for the sixpence she is willing to spend - isn't it meant to be HER special day?

    In the manner of the author's William Hill-shortlisted The Far Corner, Slipless in Settle mixes travelogue and sports history with witty match reports, observations on spectators, reminiscences of the author’s own low-grade playing career, and whole heap of pastry-based snacks.

    First comes the mates, then the ute, then his hat, dogs, horses and last of all the girlfriend. Get that right and you might just stick around. Try to jump the queue and you′re history." The lips smiled at me, but his eyes meant business.′Well then, I′ll just have to be his mate.′′Girls can′t be mates, Alice.′′We′ll see.′A footloose city backpacker who couldn′t tell a bull from a cow was hardly the ideal candidate to answer an ad for a governess on a Mackay cattle station. But Alice Greenup was game for anything, until she was bowled over by a handsome young jackeroo with a devastating smile. It was the start of a whole new way of life as Alice gave up her city-chick persona to embrace the bush and all that came with it: horses, cattle, the obsession with rain - and the correct way to wear a hat.After overcoming more than a few obstacles, the unlikely couple eventually married, moving to Rick′s family farm near Kingaroy. Determined to make their own future, they gambled their dreams on a vast property called ′Jumma′. It was a huge risk but with a lot of love, blood, sweat and tears, they were on their way.But one morning they almost lost it all. When Alice′s horse bucked her out of the saddle in remote bushland, she was gravely injured. Rick was forced to leave her lying alone, drifting in and out of consciousness, to gallop home for help. Flown by emergency helicopter to Brisbane, Alice had serious liver and brain damage. What followed would test their love to the limit.

    Huddersfield, in Yorkshire, with its distinctive manners and customs and its wealth of remarkable characters, would surely provide him with all the material he needed for his planned book, one of the great classics of travel literature. But two years later, when he sat down to write, the major events of everyday life kept intruding: the demands of a houseful of cats, the problem of getting the cooker repaired, the memories evoked by sorting through old clothes in the wardrobe . . .Still, I'm a Stranger Here Myself is a travel book of a kind, where the most hilarious adventures can happen between the kitchen and the bathroom, and where a morning's shopping can provide enough anecdotes to last a lifetime. Once again Deric Longden demonstrates his genius for taking the most ordinary materials of life and transforming them with his own special brand of gentle, inspired humour.

    In search of the most unusual and wildest festivities, the author was pelted with beans, amazed by giant snow cows, stampeded in a temple full of men wearing nothing but "nappies," befriended by alien abductees, and much more while attending a Hogmanay in Scotland, a Tomato Festival in Ripley, Tennesee, a Bean Throwing Festival in Tokyo, and a Vodou Festival in Haiti. The side-splitting stories will inspire readers to attend—or create—peculiar festivals of their own, and on a more serious note, explore and appreciate other cultures.

    Urzila talks candidly about her childhood with a great family, apart from her abusive dad, and about growing up in South Africa. She shares crazy but true tales about her OE, her move to New Zealand, coming out, getting married and having children, and her life in comedy. This is a great listen from one of our most loved and most popular comedians.

    A must for anyone who's interested in the business of laughter.' JOE LYCETT'The funniest book I've read in years.' ADAM KAYFrom a childhood spent making smoke bombs, killing wasps and carving soap in 70s Kent, Harry Hill then found himself in charge of hundreds of sick people as a junior doctor. Out of his depth and terrified, he chucked it all in to pursue his dream of becoming a stand-up comedian. Battling his way through the 90s Comedy circuit he quickly rose to become a household name and one of the UK's most celebrated comics, almost making it to the top of the showbiz tree . . .From being chased around a car park by an angry heckler, getting fired from Capital Radio and watching every episode of Freaky Eaters, to a bizarre assassination attempt and cutting up Simon Cowell's trousers, Harry takes an honest and hilarious look at the ups and downs of his life and career through the lens of what didn't go right.He shares his secrets on how to be a great comedian, finding joy in failure and creativity in struggle, whilst never forgetting that life is short . . . What readers are saying about Fight! 'Hilarious... recommended unreservedly' *****'Lots of laughs and memories of days gone by' *****'A great book... I could not put it down' *****'Beautifully written and great fun' *****

    But it’s never too late to write your next story, and to go on your next adventure. In partnership with Cayman Jack, Thought Catalog presents a collection of 25 travel stories to inspire you to leave behind the predictable and take to the open road in search of the unforgettable. Your next great memory is waiting for you, whether you realize it or not. And these exceptional stories will help you find it.

    With irrepressible humor he recounts the history of the waterways and stories of his encounters with characters along the way, and attempts to define the magic that makes England’s waterways so appealing.

    Despite themselves they managed to get from Miami to Grenada, eventually dropping the anchor of their cruising catamaran at the island of their dreams. Determined to save future sailors from themselves, "A Sail of Two Idiots" includes lessons Renee and Michael learned and shares them with you as examples of what and what not to do. This a how-to guide wrapped in a funny story--kind of like getting your serving of vegetables from a slice of pizza. Read this and make your dream of sailing away a reality. Includes: "What Broke?" sections explores the ongoing maintenance and upkeep of a cruising multihull "Island" section provide assessments of the islands of the Caribbean

    Where do she and her guests spend Christmas and how do they get there? The answers to these and many other questions are given in this intriguing and riveting account of what really goes on at a Royal Christmas, written by one of Britain’s leading Royal writers, and based on facts from impeccable sources at Buckingham Palace.Brian Hoey is acknowledged to be one of the most important Royal authors in the world, having written 28 books about the Royal Family. He conducted the first ever television interview with the Queen’s only daughter, Prince Anne, the Princess Royal, and also wrote her only official biography. He was a commentator at the wedding of Prince Charles and Princess Diana in 1981, and again, at the funeral of Diana in 1997, and his written work has appeared in countries throughout the world, particularly the United States, Canada, South Africa, Australia and New Zealand. Hoey has been a guest on many major radio and television shows in Britain and America, including the Today Show, Good Morning America and in Britain, This Morning.