Return to the Big Fancy: A Riotous Descent Into the Depths of Customer, Corporate, and Coworker Hell


Freeman Hall - 2012
    But instead of fame and fortune, he found himself stuck behind a wall of script-killing rewrites, unable to make a living.In Return to the Big Fancy, Freeman shares his wildly entertaining journey back through the fiery gates of Retail Hell. He thought he had seen it all in his day, but with the bar set higher than ever before, employees are now graciously bowing before Corporate as they climb over fellow salespeople, and even friends, to earn enough transactions and commissions to actually survive. As he learns more of the wretchedness that has befallen the sales floor, he realizes that The Big Fancy has its customers and its employees on a short leash. But leave it to Freeman and the threat of disappearing commissions to rally the retail slaves and show Corporate who's really in charge!

Slip and Go Die


Sharon Rose - 2012
    A terrible accident say the local police. But why did Beulah leave her cabin without a coat? It was thirty below in Parson's Cove. Someone must have forced her, amateur sleuth, Mabel Wickles suggests to her friend, Flori. Nobody seems to know anything, and Mabel is becoming frustrated.When Mabel witnesses some strange goings-on one night in the vacant house next door, she perks up. A person or persons unknown appear to be using the empty house for nefarious purposes. Could they be connected to Beulah's death? Mabel suspects they might and she sets out to investigate.But Mabel should be cautious. One unsuspecting resident of Parson's Cove has already slipped and died. She might be next.

Duck Duck Wally


Gabe Rotter - 2007
     Meet Wally Moscowitz. His day job is top secret. As ghostwriter for Oral B, the most famous gangsta rapper in the world, Wally is the real mastermind behind Godz-Illa Records' best-selling artist, and the best-kept secret in the Industry. But if word gets out about Wally's true profession, Godz-Illa's kajillion-dollar rap empire will be sunk, and Wally will be dead meat. When Wally comes home one particularly bizarre afternoon to find a ransom note and his best friend and dog, Dr. Barry Schwartzman, missing, Wally goes to great lengths to stop the dognappers while keeping the big secret under wraps. He must, if he wants to walk away with his job, not to mention his life, intact. The hunt for Dr. Schwartzman and the blackmailing thug who is trying to reveal hip-hop's biggest conspiracy becomes a wild-goose chase in which everyone becomes a suspect: Sue Schadenfreude, Wally's girlfriend, who makes a pretty penny massaging Barbra Streisand's papillon, Yenta; Pardeep Vishvatma, Wally's neighbor, who keeps a watchful eye on all the suspicious characters lurking about the hood; Jerry Silver, Wally's slick-rick, self-styled superagent; Abraham "Dandy" Lyons, Wally's boss and Godz-Illa's CEO-badass with Suge Knight's street cred and Tony Soprano's "friends"; Jem, the fiery, achingly familiar vixen who steals Wally's heart; Yo Yo Pa and Teddy Bizzle, Oral B's entourage; and the mysterious mob crew: Five-two Lou, Six-seven Kevin, and Balsamic Vinny, who show up when Wally needs them most. Duck Duck Wally is a hilarious romp through the absurdities of Los Angeles, the bombastic details of hip-hop culture, and a day in the life of what was supposed to be the painfully ordinary existence of Wally Moscowitz.

Clovenhoof's Diary: September


Heide Goody - 2018
    And St Michael’s Secondary School has got a new member of staff. Jeremy Clovenhoof, has spent six years living the quiet life in the suburbs after losing his job as Lord of Hell and now he thinks it’s time to share all he has learned with the next generation. Whether it’s turning toilet graffiti into art, getting a date by making nuisance calls or making the most of being ill, he’s got advice for everyone. Join Clovenhoof at the start of his year-long journey to tackle the big issues in life.

If Clouds Were Sheep: A tale of sheep farming in the Cotswolds


Sue Andrews - 2019
    She is a horse-mad girl strongly attracted to the idea of farming, Aubrey is the son of a farm manager without land or money. But with limited knowledge, much enthusiasm and the challenge of raising their young family, anything can happen. This is the true story of a shepherding life; where icy nights are spent searching for lost sheep, the lambing sheds are filled with the first cries of newborns, and idyllic summers are spent in the show ring. Amusing, poignant and beautifully detailed, this is a book about how dreams can grow from small beginnings into breeding prize-winning Texel sheep in the Cotswolds. Sue and Aubrey Andrews are internationally renowned breeders of pedigree Texels. Perfect for fans of The Yorkshire Shepherdess and The Shepherd's Life.

How to Move to Canada: A Discontented American's Guide to Canadian Relocation


André Du Broc - 2016
    If you or someone you know is discontented, distressed, or downright disturbed, maybe the Great White North is right for you, eh. But how much do you really know about Canada? Can you do a job that Canada needs (do you play hockey, drill for oil, or make poutine?)? Can you identify the best Canadian province for your lifestyle (lots of tundra or just some tundra?)? Can you master the proper pronunciation of "sorry"? What strange wizardry is the Canadian government? Is maple syrup acceptable substitution for currency? At long last, How to Move to Canada can help make your vague threat into a cold Canadian reality. This book is also full of activities such as: Color the flag of your new homeland Match the strange Canuck dialect with their local definitions And more! PLEASE NOTE: This is a humor book. It won't really help you emigrate. Rather, it's a subversive mix of real information on the Great White North plus a hilarious look at all the reasons why you won't like it there any better — and why they probably won't have you anyway.

The Adventures of Charlie Smithers


C.W. Lovatt - 2012
    Make way for Charlie Smithers.The time is the nineteenth century. The place, the Serengeti Plain, where one Charlie Smithers – faithful manservant to the arrogant bone-head, Lord Brampton (with five lines in Debrett, and a hopeless shot to boot) – becomes separated from his master during an unfortunate episode with an angry rhinoceros, thereby launching Charlie on an odyssey into Deepest Darkest Africa, and subsequently into the arms of the beautiful Loiyan…and that’s where the trouble really begins.Maasai warriors, xenophobic locals, or evil Arab slavers, the two forbidden lovers encounter everything that the unforgiving jungle can throw at them."A truly engaging read that will keep anyone’s attention from the hilarious beginning until the last word. I highly recommend this 5 star novel." ~ Chapters & Chats

Tales Around the Jack O'Lantern III: A Mary O'Reilly Short Story


Terri Reid - 2016
    Join the O'Reilly family once again as they meet around the Jack O'Lantern on Halloween night and share ghost stories that will make you shiver and have you looking over your shoulder to see if there is "a little something extra" wandering through your home tonight.

Sexy Liberal!: Of Me I Sing


Stephanie Miller - 2015
    With Arbitron ratings clocking over 3+ million listeners a week and simulcast daily in 37 million homes on Free Speech TV, where she is also the number one show, her strongest numbers are in the grand prize demographic of highly educated males 25-54, despite, or maybe because of , her status as an out gay woman. It probably explains the sublime effectiveness of her national billboard slogan: "Stephanie Miller...making men rise in the morning". Stephanie also headlined the country’s number one comedy tour, “Stephanie Miller’s Sexy Liberal Comedy Tour", as well as the number one comedy album, "Stephanie Miller's Sexy Liberal Comedy Album". She has recently had her second #1 comedy album in the country with her "Stephanie Miller's Happy Hour, Volume One". She frequents the Holy Trinity of cable news: CNN, MSNBC, and FOX, where she bursts the infallibility balloons of right wingers, often with one well-aimed pinpoint punchline. Here is SEXY LIBERAL!, which you can see as Al Franken rewritten by Sarah Silverman, Chelsea Handler horizontal on the desk of The Daily Show. Steph is the youngest child of Congressman William Miller of NY, Barry Goldwater’s running mate in 1964. We all know how that turned out. Though Steph was only 3, she shows here how that defeat affected her as much as it changed the Republican Party. It made her who she is. SEXY LIBERAL! is the book her 3,000,000 fans have been begging her to write. it’s both deeply personal and hilariously political. But most of all it is Stephanie’s unique voice, her jokes, her happy clappy optimism, and her truth that they tune in to day after day, that they download as a subscription podcast, that they buy tickets for, to see her unbleeped and in person. That’s what SEXY LIBERAL! delivers. Like an uncensored comedy drone right to your door!“Stephanie Miller is like ice cream for breakfast, or box-wine through a Krazy Straw: pure pleasure that some people say is bad for you, but you know better. Sexy Liberal! is deeply, deeply profane, big-hearted, surprising, and it might make you pee your pants a little. Just what you need! Read this book. Stephanie Miller for Everything, 2016!”--Rachel Maddow, host of The Rachel Maddow and author of Drift: The Unmooring of American Military Power “Sexy Liberal! is a great book with mind-expanding astuteness and side-splitting humor. Stephanie Miller is so wondrously witty and wise you will want to quote her. But, first, you must read her. Buy this book and help Amazon at last turn a profit. --Lily Tomlin “Sexy Liberal! is inspired reading. It is laugh-enhancing and beyond thought-provoking! A must read. --Jane Wagner Reading Stephanie's book is like being on the best kind of dinner date. The conversation is smart, funny and politically insightful. And Stephanie's contribution bad either. Seriously, what a fun read. Stephanie, in her wonderfully self-deprecating way, lets you into her brilliant mind, her no BS take on the political scene, and life itself. Enter at your own risk.--Rob Reiner

House of Testosterone: One Mom's Survival in a Household of Males


Sharon O'Donnell - 2007
    When you are the mother of boys, it seems like this question is on a continuous tape loop in your head. Humor columnist Sharon O’Donnell knows this feeling. In House of Testosterone, she chronicles her adventures raising three sons and reining in her über-male, forgetful husband, Kevin. She shares her stories of welcoming her third son into the world, resisting the gravitational pull of the “guy zone,” and running a household immersed in a world of sports, bathroom humor, and laundry. O’Donnell’s spirit shines through as she struggles to find some “me time” or survive another comical family vacation.These entertaining episodes of child- (and husband-) rearing lovingly illustrate why Sharon calls herself “Lady of the House of Testosterone.”

8 Deaths (And Life After Them)


Mark Watson - 2021
    

Salamanca Cottage


Mary Fitzgerald - 2014
    But Salamanca Cottage is not all that it seems and soon she finds that she is not alone. Then she has decide if the being she talks to and finds herself becoming fond of is real or merely a manifestation of her grief and longing.

The Girl Next Door


Sol - 2018
    She’s a rich daddy’s girl who is used to living a lavish life with the ability to get her way at the bat of her pretty blue eyes. Just months away from graduating with one of the highest GPAs at Coral Gables High and heading off to Harvard, Jaysee’s world is turned upside down when she needs a favor from her handsome neighbor. After being exiled to Miami for wreaking too much havoc on the streets of New York, Gunny is just counting down the days until he can get back on the block. Gunny’s strategy is simple; while laying low in the 305, he’s gonna keep his head down and stay out the way. But his plans are quickly derailed when he has an unexpected encounter with the girl next door.

Beyond Tonight Vol. 5 (Hollywood Dreams)


C.J. Thomas - 2016
     Wes stretched me beyond what I thought possible. One second I was breathing a sigh of relief and the next moment I was gasping for air. It was all too much. The way our lives delicately balanced pleasure and pain was like walking a slippery slope. We had our sights set on turning professional poker player, Vance Cruz, into a superstar, but the media had other plans to distract us from our daily affairs. The walls around me were closing in. And fast. I wanted to run. Wes kept his grip firm, not letting me get too far. Despite his brute strength, they were after me, and they were after Wes. Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse, the walls were breached. My nerves were raw and I was fatigued. I needed a break. A way out of the chaos surrounding my life. Sheila had her ideas of what I should do, and so did Julia Mabel. And when I flew home to Minnesota thinking that Wes and I were done for good, I learned something that might just save me from losing the love of my life forever. Mature audience only. 18+ This story is planned to unfold over several stories and Vol. 5 ends on a cliffhanger.

Welcome To The Low Life 3


Natavia - 2018
     After the loss of Zyira, Beretta and Kemara tried to pick up the pieces. Their wedding is approaching and Kemara is trying to leave the past behind before she becomes Ms.Jones. But every time she gets closer to her happily ever after, a storm strikes and causes havoc on her life. Beretta is the man of the city, with more money. the GMBAM gang has spread. But with more money comes bigger problems. No longer the loud mouth block boy, he’s moving up and pushing more weight than ever before. Two females from his past refuse to sit back, and watch the love of his life reap all the benefits of the fast life. Everyone wants a piece of the pie. But will he be able to resist the temptations or become the ruthless man he used to be? Piper thought she found love in the right place, but real love has been in front of her the whole time. But it might be too late to rekindle that old flame when a shocking secret is exposed. Will Pistol be able to forgive her? Nothing Poppa has planned worked out in his favor. In order to survive his last resort is to call a truce with his number one enemy, Beretta. But like always, luck is never on Poppa’s side so he finds himself going down a path of self-destruction again. GMBAM have a few disloyal members in their camp. Someone is gunning for Beretta’s throne and he won’t stop until he has it all including his wife, Kemara. But it’s a part of the game he chose and the winner takes all. Welcome to the Lowlife 3...