One day you are young, free and single; the next you are bald, fat and washed-up, with weird tendrils of hair growing out of your ears. None of it seems fair. With age should come dignity and respect, but instead everyone makes tired jokes about buying a motorbike. Marcus Berkmann isn't having it. Having marked his fiftieth birthday by hiding under the duvet for six weeks, the author of the cricket classics Rain Men and Zimmer Men is now determined to find some light in the all-consuming darkness. Musing over birth, death and all the messy stuff in between, he concludes that however dreadful you look in the mirror today, it will be much worse in ten years' time. His brutally candid despatch from the frontline is not for the faint-hearted, which is to say anyone under thirty-five.

    Baiting is the art of luring unsuspecting pedophiles (as well as the occasional religious zealots and others) into online chat with a false persona and then turning the conversations into the most vile, merciless and hilariously abusive logs ever recorded on the World Wide Web. This book will leave you less afraid of internet predators, yet more terrified knowing that people this stupid live among us without supervision. Either way, you will never look at Instant Messenger the same way again.

    Get to know the man behind the apron strings, the misunderstood mixologist with the gold-plated heart, as he dispenses advice to drunks like it was Duff on draft, recommends some of his signature (and watered down) drinks like the Moe-jito, tries out a pick-up line or two, dreams of actually getting a date, dishes a little on his acting career, and counts his blessings (like babysittin' Maggie Simpson) that make life worth livin' for at least one more day.

    For years, listeners have written to NPR to describe such moments. Now animal lovers especially will want to make sure their tanks are full. Heard on "All Things Considered, Morning Edition, Talk of the Nation," and "Wait WaitaDon't Tell Me!," hosted by "Morning Edition"'s Steve Inskeep, these stories will make you laugh out loud and shed a tear or two.

    Poet Laureate, shares an evening of his poetry in a benefit reading for WNYC, New York Public Radio. Often compared to Robert Frost, his poetry has been embraced by people of all ages and backgrounds, and his readings are most often standing room only. Performed by the author at Peter Norton Symphony Space in New York City, Billy Collins reads 24 of his poems, including -Dharma- --a spiritual yet humbling ode to man's best friend, -The Lanyard--an amusing recollection about the popular, if not pointless, summer camp pastime, and -Consolation- --a tongue-in-cheek reflection of a cancelled European trip, and the benefits of staying home instead. In addition to the poetry readings, Collins also spends some time in a brief question and answer session where he reflects on what makes good poetry, his own process of reaching his audiences as a poet, the success of his Poetry 180 programs in schools nationwide, and an amusing sidebar on his memories growing up as an only child. At times pensive and sardonic, amusing and subtly sarcastic, Billy Collins Live celebrates both the simple and the complex in a language that appeals to all.

    From the office TGIF (the overgrown frat boy in the office who always says “party”) to the Lieberal (a Democrat with Republican sympathies), from Uncle Tomatoes (Italians who hate The Sopranos) to Cherohonkees (white Baby Boomers who dress like Native Americans), each profile offers a detailed description of everything from sex appeal and favorite pick-up lines to popular names and habitats. The result is both a brilliant parody and thorough outing of just about every neurosis, attribute, and personality type there is.

    Spy: The Funny Years will remind the magazine's million readers why they loved and depended on Spy and bring to a new generation the jewels of its reporting and writing, photography, illustration, design, and world-class mischief-making. It will demonstrate Spy's singular niche in American magazine and cultural history. But it is also intended to be enjoyed on its own: one beautiful volume containing Spy's funniest and most creative work, along with the ultimate insiders account of how it all came to be.All the best is here: Separated at Birth; Naked City; The Fine Print; Logrolling in Our Time; the Blurb-o-Mat; those hysterical (and now ubiquitous) charts; the inside stories on the New York Times and Hollywood by J.J. Hunsecker and Celia Brady; the covers; investigative features; and the hilarious stories on pretty much everyone who was anyone during the late 80s and early 90s. Not to mention the often grisly but always entertaining regular cast of characters from Spy's pages -- the churlish dwarf billionaires; beaver-faced moguls; bull-whip-wielding uber-agents; knobby-kneed socialites; and, of course, short-fingered vulgarians.During its heyday, from 1986 through 1993, Spy broke important ground in journalism and design, defining smartness for its generation. It was a once-in-a-lifetime creation that shaped the zeitgeist and succeeded (for a while) against all odds. Spy: The Funny Years will be the fun, stylish, hilarious holiday gift of the year.

    Helping to bring these forgotten figures into the light, Andrew Gimson's illuminating accounts are accompanied by sketches from Guardian sartirical cartoonist, Martin Rowson, making this the perfect gift for all lovers of history and politics.

    These poor reading habits hold us back, and it’s why so many people don’t enjoy reading. You see, your brain is a lot like Goldilocks. When you read too slow, your mind wanders, you get distracted, and reading feels like a chore. When you try to read too fast, you can't comprehend what you're reading. The key is to read at the right speed using the best reading strategies for your learning type. In this short read, you’ll discover proven strategies to read faster without having to: Practice speed-reading techniques for hours and hours Skim text and risk missing crucial information Read cliff notes or shortened versions of a book This book combines the best lessons from speed reading techniques, neuroscience, and modern technology to allow you to read faster and comprehend more than you ever thought possible—and you can start to see the results today! Say Goodbye to Slow Reading Forever! I was always a slow reader. I could never focus long enough to read an entire book. I often forgot what I had just read, and had to re-read sentences over and over again. Reading was a frustrating, slow, and painful experience, so I tried to make up for my poor reading skills by studying more and working harder. But studying hard will only get you so far when you're using the wrong strategies. I wanted to be able to read more, learn more, and, most importantly, remember more of what I was reading. If you’ve quit reading more books than you can remember because of boredom or frustration, this book will change your life—and every book from now on will be a “quick read” for you. Everything changed when I developed a better way to read entire books very fast… Incredible Reading Results in 7 Days I was able to read four large books in my first week of using these methods. In Read Better Faster: How to Triple Your Reading Speed and Comprehension Without Speed Reading, Skimming, or Skipping you will discover: The exact methods anyone can use to read books faster than you ever imagined Never again struggle to finish a book, no matter how big or complex it is Start reading (and finishing) more books your friends and colleagues recommend to you How to guarantee laser-focused reading so you never have to re-read or forget what you just read How to comprehend and retain everything you read using a method that forces your brain to turn what you read into long-term memory storage How to accelerate your ability to learn more by reading faster and remembering more information than ever before This book is perfect for you if: You need to study for an exam, improve your grades, or do better in school You need to learn new business skills to improve your career or company You want to easily breeze through your favorite fiction books so you can enjoy reading even more You’ve always wanted to read more books but just can’t find the time or struggle to get through a book I encourage you to in

    (Except secretly you really do you masochistic, beastly person you.) Illustrated, painfully funny and drop-your-jaw ridiculous, this is trivia from the cesspit of time that you won't be able to stop reading once you start.*To aid childbirth.**They exploded it with 100 times too much dynamite and rained blubber down on unsuspecting people and buildings.***Decency prevents us from answering this one here. You'll have to buy the book to find out.

    John Crace and Spurs were made for each other. But then the team started to play like possible champions. For most fans, these are the glory moments they dream about. For Crace they just opened a new dimension of anxiety: the fear of success. Crace has supported Spurs for 40 years. His wife thinks he suffers from a psychiatric disorder, but fandom is not only one of the ways he negotiates his relationships, it also helps him make some sense of his life. Vertigo is the story of why fandom that starts out in boyish hope always ends in dark comedy.

    Satan's Advice to Young Lawyers is a pithy guide to rising from lowly first-year associate to renowned leader of the legal community.Inside the pages of this remarkable book, Satan offers his profound counsel on topics as diverse as choosing evil as a path to power, the billable hour, how to steal clients from your law firm, fashion, and more.Do not let your competition have these secrets for themselves. Get the book now.This profound guidebook makes a great gift for your favorite law student, bar exam taker, bar exam passer or new lawyer.

    A really good joke, like a great poem, memorable song lyric, razor-sharp anecdote, or Zen koan, is a portal of discovery—it can get a meaningful message across in a way that’s clear, humorous, and practical. It’s the secret weapon of every great comedian—there’s the joke, and then there’s the subtext of the joke, and that can mean serious business. A funny, funny joke about a therapist and his patient conveys, for example, an important lesson on the power of communication. A surprising joke about a tribal shaman and the weather service turns into a necessary critique on how we should view experts.

    All three books are set on the enchanted island of Corfu in the 1930s, and tell the story of the eccentric English family who moved there. For Gerald, the budding zoologist, Corfu was a natural paradise, teeming with strange birds and beasts that he could collect, watch and care for. But life was not without its problems - his family often objected to his animal-collecting activities, especially when the beasts wound up in the villa or - even worse - the fridge. With hilarious yet endearing portraits of his family and their many unusual hangers-on, The Corfu Trilogy also captures the beginnings of the author's lifelong love of animals. Recounted with immense humour and charm, this wonderful account of Corfu's natural history reveals a rare, magical childhood.

    Highly inflammable, the glass-jawed Birmingham lurches from one catastrophe to the next. Through encounters with washing machine spin cycles to his lovelorn pursuit of the aggressively uninterested Sammy, Chris Pascoe's hilarious book paints an intimate portrait of the author's calamitous relationship with a cat wholly unsuited to being feline. Persistently molested by an irate sparrow, physically incapable of negotiating the intricacies of the cat-flap and with a near-fatal appreciation of the effects of gravity, Brum nevertheless remains steadfast in his subconscious pursuit of oblivion. Worryingly, these stories are true. Will nine lives be enough?