And it is Modi-led India that has this high honour. Prime Minister Modi rolls out the red carpet for the aliens. He receives them at the airport, shows them the sights in Delhi and convinces them to invest in the Make in India campaign. The leader of the alien delegation even holds a broom to promote Swachh Bharat. But what is the real reason the aliens have come to India? Are they friends? Or will they turn foes? Read this hilarious, rib-tickling novel from the author of Unreal Elections to find out.

    All 97 counties of it! Surely it can't be as bad as everyone tells him. After twenty years living abroad, he thinks the time is right to search his homeland for the best of British using new eyes, those of a foreign tourist, and in the only way he knows how – by bicycle. Armed with a list of recommendations gathered from friends and strangers alike and the most spontaneous of routes, he pedals 5,000 miles through damp English country lanes, soggy Welsh moorland and windswept Scottish mountains. He gets wet quite often. Following on from the success and irreverent style of both No Place Like Home, Thank God and Hungry for Miles, Steven seeks out the quirky in the people he meets, the places he visits and the food he eats. Can his initial store of positivity survive the journey, or will it be ground down by the traffic, the weather and his British, vegetable-free diet of beer, pies and pork scratchings? In this, Book 1, The Journey South, Steven travels from Merseyside to Warwickshire, through the whole of Wales, the West Country, the south coast and to London. Armed with a bag of googly eyes, he meets a poetry-prescribing nurse, stumbles across Hilda Ogden's lawnmower, has his footwear stolen by foxes, discovers some very special Mexican fleas, crashes the TARDIS and visits dozens of British capitals, including its infidelity capital, its boob job capital and its dogging capital. He experiences "real" Britain – the good and the bad – its Morris dancers, pie 'n' mash and the pinnacle of British culture, a good old-fashioned street fight. The concluding part, The Journey North, covering the east of England, Scotland and the north-west of England will be available in Summer 2017.

    Whether this is because they haven't yet mastered the 21st century phone or because they live to embarrass you throughout all forms of communication, Text Fails from Mum, is a hilarious collection of our all time favourite texts from Mum.Please stop changing the google logo so much, I like the original one.Mum I don't change the logo. Google changes it.On my computer, you don't run the Google?If I did I wouldn't be driving a 2004 Ford.Andy, I can't find my phone. Can you call it so I can try and track it down?I don't have time to be quippy, mum. It's in your hand.What? No it's not. I've got a bag of groceries in my hand. Are you saying it's in the grocery bag? How do you know these things!?WHAT ARE YOU TEXTING ME WITH!?Never mind! I found it! Thanks!This humour gift book is the laugh out loud answer to the annual conundrum what should I get Mum for Christmas, Mother's Day and her Birthday? Text Fails From Mum is the perfect stocking filler, and a gift all the family can relate to and enjoy.

    Want to read an example? Have a look at How an Elephant was Weighed.A hippo believes he is the most handsome of all animals. But do the other animals in the forest agree? Find out in Hippo Humbled.Shonar the deer is in trouble! What’s Kalia the Crow going to do now?A washerman is convinced his donkey can turn into a man! Find out why in The Dhobi and his Donkey.

    In 1964, I embarked on a journey that was to be my life's adventure.  I hired on as a pilot for Air America and its clandestine operations in Southeast Asia.      Flying for the CIA's secret airline was a dream come true.  Air America's operations were unknown.  Its schedules were irregular.  Its pilots were shadow people.  It was the world of spooks, covert air ops and adventure.  I had already been a pilot for more than half of my life when I left my home in Detroit for the wild escapades that awaited me in Southeast Asia.  Air America had been the pinnacle of my life and, had the trajectory remained steady, my world and my career should have gone onward and upward from that point.      The intent of telling my story is to take the reader on an historical journey of a little-known place in time through my own personal account.  Within the context of history, my narrative is not to be considered anything but my own experience.     The ranks of Air America were comprised of a host of patriotic professionals who deserve a place of honor in the annals of history.  However, many colorful characters wore the Air America wings, and inside the course of my narrative, the reader will be subjected to people and situations that cannot be filed neatly under anything resembling normal sanity.      Most names, except those of a known or high-ranking or public nature, and those I wish to recognize for heroic performances, have been changed to protect the innocent and guilty alike.

     So waste no more time, scroll up this page and order the the ebook right now.

    The book transported my imagination where I was right inside a courtroom drama…. Fantastic, thoroughly recommend this book!” “Both educational and entertaining …I thought the author did an excellent job of introducing Americans to the British legal system (which bemuses many of us as much as cricket). I always love good summations, and these were of high calibre… The author demonstrated a mastery of providing meaningful snippets of personal life essentially in textual asides.”“Author John Burton, Q.C. knows of whereof he writes, and his book, as well as being a well plotted, well written and highly enjoyable murder trial novel, is an education in the English criminal justice system, warts and all… There is also a fascinating subplot about the business of English criminal lawyers and the intrigues of the “Chambers” in which Brant practices.”“…..the skills of both the Prosecution, Joanna Glass QC and the Defence are on display. The reader is made to feel part of the Defence team.”David Brant QC is a newly appointed Queen’s Counsel, a “Silk”, a Criminal Barrister struggling against ever-dwindling legal aid funds and a lack of work. His Chambers is also suffering internal and external pressures and his Senior Clerk seems to only serve a select few. Life at the Bar is more challenging than ever before. His personal life is not much better. Having faced an acrimonious divorce after an inadvisable liaison with a female Solicitor, his life has become a mixture of enforced rest and ever increasing consumption of Claret and Rioja Reserva. However, after a night out with his Senior Clerk, he is instructed to defend in a Murder trial, leading one of the instructing solicitor’s firm’s In-House Barristers.The client is a Mr Damien Clarke, a cocaine addict charged with killing a known associate, Usman Hussain, after a night of smoking crack together in Hussain’s flat. The evidence against Damien appears almost overwhelming and as the case progresses towards trial it is strengthened by further forensic scientific evidence.David Brant QC must use all his forensic skill to combat the array of damning evidence against Damien and to pit his wits against a highly competent Prosecutor and a Judge who has a personal dislike for him. The Silk Brief takes us from before David Brant QC is instructed, through his early preparation of the case and conferences with the client in the High Security Belmarsh prison, through to the trial and verdict. It provides the day by day record of a murder trial including the examination and cross-examination of lay and expert witnesses, Counsel’s speeches, the Judges summing up and finally the jury’s deliberations and verdict. Although a work of fiction, the author draws extensively on his knowledge of the Criminal Bar of England and Wales, having practiced as a Criminal Barrister for over thirty years, latterly as Queen’s Counsel, conducting many trials, including murder trials in the Central Criminal Court, known colloquially and fondly as “The Old Bailey”.

    Now, I can add Margaret Lashley to that very short list." “Her characters are lovable and believable and you cheer, and cry, along with them.” “I found myself deeply immersed in Val’s journey and laughing out loud.” “If you enjoy Janet Evanovich, you’ll love Margaret Lashley!” “From the first page to the last, I was captivated.” “The characters are great – so many laugh out loud moments…” “Hilarious! I can completely relate to Val.” “Made me laugh, made me cry…. Couldn’t stop reading it.” "Margaret writes with a "smirk" of a Cheshire cat. Fantastic read.” If you like deeply flawed characters and laugh-out-loud situations, you’ll love Margaret Lashley’s hilarious Val Fremden Mystery Series. Why did you decide to write women’s fiction? I grew up in an era of strong women role models, such as Marlo Thomas in That Girl, as well as Mary Tyler Moore and Carol Burnett in shows that bore their names. These women were pursuing their own dreams, their own ways. I didn’t see much of that in fiction today. I wanted to create a character that was strong, yet vulnerable. One that celebrated the everyday, self-made woman who was struggling to finally put her own needs first. My main character, Val, is a survivor who bears the scars of her hard journey proudly, and with her own quirky coping mechanisms and sense of humor. Where did you get the idea for the Val & Pals Series? Real life was my inspiration. Today’s society makes it hard for a woman to be less than beautiful and perfect and subservient. I wanted to explore the idea of a woman who decided to lay down her tiara and mirror and scorecard and begin to play by her own rules. This type of freedom costs her dearly in many ways, but would it be worth it? That’s what this series explores with tears and triumphs and a barrel full of laughs. What type of reader would enjoy your brand of women’s fiction? Readers who like to be taken by surprise – who like to laugh and cry and dissolve into another world when they read. My characters have their great triumphs and cringe-worthy failures. They are flawed and vulnerable and funny as hell. My stories draw laughs using a wide net – from Pat Conroy’s twisted, dark family humor to Bridget Jones’s slap-stick situational gaffs. Things don’t always turn out like they planned. But that’s life – when it’s truly lived.

    Easy reading and enjoyable.." - John P Sam's trousers were round his ankles. The microwaved chicken - long past its sell-by date - had made a hasty exit. He was down a ditch in the middle of nowhere, and there weren't any tissues. Suzy had dumped him. Things weren't going well. He was only one wipe away from his life changing forever when he found a blue IKEA bag packed with banknotes. Gary wants to kill him. So does Vlad. Ashton wants to paint him naked and then there's the Contessa. Suzy isn't certain they've broken up. One thing’s for sure: Sam's life has been turned upside down.

    She must fulfil her father’s dying wish and discover who the mysterious Eve is. Meanwhile a dead drug dealer is found on an abandoned airfield that the locals say is haunted. The trail of both mysteries will lead to the most shocking discovery of Nikki’s career and put her whole team in mortal danger. STALKER ON THE FENSDI Nikki Galena’s friend Helen Brook is involved in a serious accident where she is trapped in a collapsed cellar. After her hard-won recovery, Helen is still getting flashbacks to a man she says was down there with her and who confessed to a murder. But no trace of this man can be found. Then Helen tells Nikki that someone is watching her. But is all this in her friend’s imagination and part of her post-traumatic stress?And why is Stephen Cox back in town? He’s the villain who tore Nikki’s life apart and he seems to have returned for revenge. CAPTIVE ON THE FENSA young woman’s body is found in a remote barn on the fens. before she was killed, one of her fingers had been cut off. Who is inflicting this violence and why?The young woman in the barn had been kept captive for some time. And the case shows strong similarities to an unsolved murder in Derbyshire. When another woman is found alive with similar injuries the case grows even more complicated.

    Her grandson Tripp is doing great in school. Her relationship with Officer Preston is blooming. And now, her daughter Lilly is visiting for a few months, while her boyfriend Matthew is filming for a starring role in a movie located close to her sweets shop! Unfortunately, soon after they arrive, an assistant turns up dead on the movie set. And it looks like Matthew is the main murder suspect. Not to mention, Tripp’s friend Hannah gets some really bad news that has them all worried. Maybe things aren’t going so good after all. Will Hannah end up being okay? And, will Mary and Officer Preston be able to clear Matthew of the murder charges? Or is Matthew truly guilty of the crime… AUTHOR’S NOTE: Thank you for your interest in my Sweets Shop Cozy Mysteries Series! If you like reading about murder mysteries, women who own sweets shops, family life and a little clean romance on the side, you’ll likely enjoy this series. So download and immerse yourself in this fun four-book series located in the small town of Brooks, Georgia…

    This book was brought to you by the one and only - THE CLOWN FACTORY.

    For Alex Troutt, a trip back home for a much-needed summer vacation proves only one thing: greed rules. But how it takes root could destroy her world. Fueled by the lust of power and money, the shadow of death envelopes her seaside hometown, including those closest to Alex. But as disconnected investigations converge into one focal point, Alex will stop at nothing to blow the entire crime ring straight to hell—even if she has to make the ultimate sacrifice…her life. AT Dusk (Book 5) Eyes are the window to the soul…unless there isn't a soul to be found.  A little boy makes his first kill—and he likes it. He is cunning, charming, and without remorse.      He is a sociopath.     As boy turns to man, what lies inside takes root. He will make a mark on Boston unlike any other, and FBI Special Agent Alex Troutt must figure out how to stop him.     But when she and her close-knit team move in closer, the stakes become much higher as the case takes on a more personal tone. It’s a frantic race to stop a manipulative killer before his web of deceit and destruction escalates into a blood bath of haunting proportions.  AT Last (Book 6) Thirty years after losing a parent to a hit-and-run drunk driver, FBI agent Alex Troutt finally confronts the killer--the same man who just murdered the Boston police chief. And what Alex pulls from him shatters her core. Armed with little more than hope and a shred of decades-old evidence, Alex chases a memory from her past, hoping that she'll find the mother she never really had. With her old buddy Archie on board --as much as ever can be -- the hunt takes her deep into the foothills of West Virginia. A fanatical religious cult has created its own society. Clinging to a whisper of hope, Alex must out-think and out-duel everyone in her path to right a thirty-year wrong. Will Alex’s quest to find the truth destroy her life all over again?

    Well, technically more of a midriff crisis, if he’s honest. Still, the Dad-bod is ‘in’ these days, isn’t it?He needs a girlfriend. But even though he's constantly surrounded by women, he can't seem to escape from the friend-zone slammer.Keeping the kids alive and entertained, working all hours, and then spending half your income on shopping, aren’t easy things to deal with.Trying to find love and happiness is even harder. Those dreams of ‘happy ever after’ seem like an unreachable utopia. But that hasn’t stopped him trying.Will Danny ever find his special someone? Or will he live out his remaining decades in dismal celibacy? What if he’s been looking in all the wrong places? What if love is right around the corner and he doesn’t even realise?Dad lit at its cynical best - hilariously relatable.