Book picks similar to
Criswell Predicts From Now to the Year 2000! by Criswell
standard-books
suave-jacket
fiction
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The Locklear Letters
Michael Kun - 2003
His innocent letter requesting an autographed picture begins a bizarre turn of events that eventually costs him his job, foils his romantic intentions toward a coworker, drains his finances, and generally ruins his life. Sid, a Don Quixote character with large blind spots regarding the fate of his one-sided correspondence with the movie star and his own behavior, cannot escape the wrath of lawyers, public relations bulldogs, angry bosses, and ex-girlfriends that drags his life down the tubes. Until he fights back.
The Junk-Drawer Corner-Store Front-Porch Blues
John R. Powers - 1992
At turns hilarious and bittersweet, this novel is destined to be a bookshelf classic.
The Book of Andy
Timothy Browne - 2021
We compare our life with the snapshots of happy faces posted on social media and feel terrible about our situation—often hopeless. What if we can live our lives, not defined by the trappings of this world, but by discovering contentment in the simple things and in what we are given?In this modern-day Book of Job, Andy sits at the bottom of life’s pecking order. Working as a honey-dipper (a septic truck driver) and living in a single-wide trailer in small-town Montana, Andy longs for love and a better life. His only solace is found on the wild side of the river amongst the ponderosa and bull trout.But when Andy is granted all that he desires, the peace he once found in his simple existence, and the serenity of dipping a dry fly into the Blackfoot River evaporates. A family secret that seems like a cruel betrayal emerges as a great blessing in disguise.The Book of Andy is for everyone who feels that life has beat them down…for anyone who prays for a breakthrough. Fans of Walter Mitty, A River Runs Through It, and Forrest Gump will enjoy this humorous family saga of finding faith, love, and contentment.
The Junket (Kindle Single)
Mike Albo - 2011
He lands an enviable gig writing about shopping and fashion for the city’s major newspaper, but an ill-fated promotional junket gets Albo into hot water. He becomes a gossip item and finds himself caught in an acrimonious war between Old and New Media. Here's a gimlet-eyed account of the back-biting media scene, a glimpse into the inner workings of the fashion crowd, and a candid portrait of what it takes to survive as a writer in today’s chattering and watchful New York City."I was perilously close to exposing a secret underground economy of promotion: favors and junkets and banquets and gifts that keeps the city in motion, and keeps underpaid writers at work. Basically, I became the Silkwood of Swag."
Junkers Season Two (Junkers #2)
Benjamin Wallace - 2017
It was supposed to be a place where every child’s favorite characters came to life. And, it was, until those characters went nuts and started killing everyone. Then it wasn’t so happy. Ten years later Jake and his team of robot reclamation specialists are heading to the island theme park to confront the evil machines, discover Kat’s connection to the disaster and boost the flagging ratings on their reality show, Scrappers. Fearless Monkeynauts, overly friendly Bearberry Bears, feuding Presidents, Dinosty Warriors, fairy tale legends and more populate the abandoned park and only the Junkers are brave enough, or dumb enough, to go for a visit. Join Jake, Hailey, Kat, Savant, Mason and, of course, Glitch as they try to uncover the mystery of what they call The Tragic Kingdom.
Warwolf
T.R. Pearson - 2011
Wry, laconic, and more than a little world-weary, Tatum pursues a savage killer through the rural Virginia uplands with the hot-headed assistance of Special Agent Kate LeComte. Warwolf is by turns hilarious and deeply unsettling, and T.R. Pearson’s gift for capturing the true voice of the new south is on conspicuous display. The mountains of Virginia have never seemed so dangerously alive, and there remains no better company in the southern highlands than Deputy Ray Tatum.Ray Tatum also appears in Cry Me A River, Blue Ridge, and Polar -- written to be read in no particular order.
Gary's Children (Shingles Book 2)
Rick Gualtieri - 2018
Gary Handler has issues. His boss hates him, his mother hounds him, and his cat thinks he’s an idiot. But that’s okay because Gary’s got the perfect solution to all of life’s troubles: a porn site subscription and his right hand.Sadly, all habits grow old, even the fun ones. Gary soon finds himself at the doorstep of a creepy old pawn shop where he buys a used adult novelty toy to spice up his one-man sex life.Pity for him that it’s cursed by the angry spirits of all the “kids” he’s flushed down the toilet. Needless to say, hairy palms are about to become the least of his worries.----------Jack on, jack off ... with the Jacklight in book 2 of Shingles, the horror comedy series that’s not for those with faint hearts or weak bladders.
King Henry and the Three Little Trips (The King Henry Tapes)
Richard Raley - 2016
Telling three interconnected stories taking place on the same day, two weeks after events in "The Foul Mouth and the Mancy Martial Artist" this novel is a can't miss for fans of THE KING HENRY TAPES. Spending equal time with Tyson Bonnie, Eva Reti, and King Henry Price himself, KING HENRY AND THE THREE LITTLE TRIPS shows the fallout from the Days of Supernatural Exhibit in both the personal cost for our characters and the political cost for supernatural organizations worldwide as fear of the Curator spreads to even the Asylum itself. Read as Tyson Bonnie escorts Vicky Welf to the Coyote Nation compound, find out if Eva Reti can survive the anima experiment inflicted upon her, and follow King Henry as he returns to the Asylum seeking Plutarch's help. The queue for the "Foul Mouth and the Pit of No Return" roller-coaster begins here! THE KING HENRY TAPES Book 1 - "The Foul Mouth and the Fanged Lady" (released) Book 2 - "The Foul Mouth and the Cat Killing Coyotes" (released) Book 3 - "The Foul Mouth and the Troubled Boomworm" (released) Book 4 - "The Foul Mouth and the Headless Hunny" (released) Book 5 - "The Foul Mouth and the Mancy Martial Artist" (released) Book 5.5 - "King Henry and the Three Little Trips" (released) Book 6 - "The Foul Mouth and the Pit of No Return" (forthcoming)
Mango Digger: A Mango Bob Adventure
Bill H. Myers - 2018
Living in his motorhome, Walker is tasked with finding the daughter of the Mafia boss he befriended in Key West. She went missing while digging crystals in the mountains of Arkansas and to aid in his search, Walker reluctantly agrees to take along a mystery woman who supposedly has a psychic gift. She's smart, sexy, and single and the question is, does she have more on her quirky mind than finding the bosses daughter? Ride along as Walker, the mystery woman, and Mango Bob the cat travel cross country in Walker's motorhome, trying to avoid the trouble that seems to show up around every curve in the twisty mountain roads. A fun read!
See Mommy Run
Laura Kennedy - 2012
Set in the 1980s, she endures a sub-zero marriage to Mike, Assistant Manager of Friendly Finance, as well as the impossible role of mother to fifteen-and-a-half-year-old Kim and fourteen-year-old Molly. Adding to her misery, is the job she loathes at Big Brother Insurance Company. Life in the San Fernando Valley in Southern California is a soap opera. Kim and Molly skip school, smoke pot, and call each other bitch, while Mike loan sharks by day and guzzles Coors by night. Eventually a line is drawn across the matted shag carpet when Mike sides with the girls.Pushed to her limit when Kim's truancy draws the attention of the State Attorney's Office, Margie flees to San Francisco and a new life.
Key Weirder
Robert Tacoma - 2005
When beach-connoisseur Taco Bob decides on a road trip, he leaves the Conch Republic in search of the beautiful woman who broke his heart, and the ultimate trout recipe. But soon after he leaves town, the entire state is in an uproar when a young man on a mission from Texas makes off with the most prized souvenir in Key West. Meanwhile, a sexy but twisted cult leader shows up, determined to find some magical gold idols so she can rule the world, or at least the world of lingerie fashion. But first she has to deal with a renegade bounty hunter, a nearly invisible rival from her past, and the untold thousands of people cramming into Key West for the biggest outdoor concert in the state's history. Taco Bob is going to have plenty of surprises waiting when he returns to the southernmost city in the US. At least it was the southernmost city when he left.
Unspeakable
Tony Marturano - 2015
What happened that day was so horrifying, so devastating, that the place was left to ruin, until now. A decade later, thirty-two year old Rupert Harrison, the only surviving heir to the Harrison publishing dynasty, has ordered Kenning Hall restored to its former glory. It's time to go back. Now, if you think you've heard this story before, think again, for this is just the beginning. Something is waiting at Kenning Hall. Something vengeful, malevolent, and it will follow them home.
The Heming Way: How to Unleash the Booze-Inhaling, Animal-Slaughtering, War-Glorifying, Hairy-Chested Retro-Sexual Legend Within, Just Like Papa!
Marty Beckerman - 2011
They cannot skin a fish, dominate a battlefield, or transform majestic creatures of the Southern Hemisphere into piano keyboards.The Heming Way demonstrates how modern eunuchs—brainwashed by PETA and Alcoholics Anonymous—can learn from Papa's unparalleled example: drunken, unshaven, meat-devouring, wife-divorcing, and gloriously self-destructive.Advice includes:How to kill enough animals to render a species endangered—just like Papa!Getting your friends to think drinking a daiquiri is manly . . . just by drinking one nine yourselfAchieving sufficiently high testosterone levels to never have to worry about the chance of having a daughter instead of a sonAnd much more!Profane, insightful, hilarious and loaded with more than 150 photos, facts and insights about Papa, The Heming Way is a difficult path, and not for the weak, but truth is manlier than fiction.
The Fuck It List: All The Things You Can Skip Before You Die
Peter Conners - 2015
The F*ck It List is a hilarious middle-finger salute to all those absurd life goals that will ensure an anxiety-filled middle age will be followed by shame-filled golden years. It pokes a sorely needed pin into a bloated rite of passage that's ripe for deflation. Do you really need to firewalk or didn't Oprah and Tony Robbins take care of that for us? Swimming with sharks is a really dumb idea, so let's leave that with the gullible reality tv desperadoes, shall we? Kevin Pryslak has come up with a "to don't list" that will have you laughing out loud and leave you with lots more time to do the all the things YOU really want to do!
Werebear Scare
Nova Nelson - 2021
Now in her mid-forties, she’s starting to feel like she’s seen it all.But that’s about to change.When a simple case of a missing werebear takes an unexpected turn, Eastwind’s angel sheriff enlists Ruby’s psychic gifts to help find the culprit. But a string of suspicious attacks and rumblings of an old sinister legend lead Ruby True and Sheriff Bloom into uncharted territory.Will they find the one responsible for the carnage before it finds them?Werebear Scare: An Eastwind Witches Paranormal Cozy Mystery is the first book of the Ruby True Magical Mystery series that takes place 30 years before the Eastwind Witches Cozy Mysteries. If you like strong female friendships, gossipy quaint towns, and lighthearted humor, you will love Nova Nelson's delightful tale!Buy Werebear Scare to solve the mystery today!Note: This is a second edition and was previously published under the series True & Bloom.