Includes Overdue Account, Walter's Cargo Shorts, Simon's Piecharts, Missing Missy, Obviously a Foggot, Formal Complaints, Justin’s Floodlight, Matthew’s Party, Permission Slip and many more.

    We all know one! They like to groan and grumble, offering their own commentary on the shortcomings of modern life. Whether it is queues at the supermarket, the state of the health system, the price of a pint these days, the hairstyles of teenagers, or the number of Maltesers you actually get in a bag, there is always something that will get their goat. 'The Grumpy Old Git's Guide to Life' is a hilarious celebration of all these grumps, how to identify one, what exactly they find so irritating and why we find their rants quite so amusing.

    A collection of 45 ridiculous 911 emergency calls, submitted by 911 Call Center Operators across the U.S.Dedicated to you, the Taxpayer who funded these calls.Note: A quick 10-minute read of humorous quotes from real calls.Just enough for a grin of the day!

    

    A comprehensive guide to Amor Towles' acclaimed new novel 'A Gentleman in Moscow', this discussion aid includes a wealth of information and resources: useful literary and historical context; an author biography; a plot synopsis; analyses of themes & imagery; character analysis; twenty thought-provoking discussion questions; recommended further reading and even a quick quiz. For those in book clubs, this useful companion guide takes the hard work out of preparing for meetings and guarantees productive discussion. For solo readers, it encourages a deeper examination of a multi-layered text.

    Culling over 300 pages of some of today's most thrilling writers, The Best of 2.13.61 Publications hallmarks our company's ten year existence. Excerpts include new material from Henry Rollins and Hubert Selby, Jr, as well as excerpts from Henry Miller's love letters, Nick Zedd's hilarious nihilistic New York urban spelunkings, Ian Shoales' undeniably witty social commentaries and so much more.

    But I wrote a lot of good poems.”So maintains Anita Liberty, the caustically funny New York City performance artist who was going along happily healing her hurt by hating and humiliating her detestable ex-boyfriend on stage and in print until the unthinkable happened: she had a good date. And one good date deserves another. And another. And another. And, all of the sudden, Anita Liberty finds herself in a predicament. Getting dumped launched Anita’s career–Will falling in love finish it? Who’s more important: her devoted audience or her newly devoted boyfriend? And on top of everything, Hollywood won’t stop calling and Anita can’t figure out if It wants a serious commitment or just a little bit of no-strings-attached fun. From digging mercilessly into the minutiae of her new relationship to dramatically torching every professional bridge she crosses in L.A., Anita refuses to let a big load of bliss get dumped right in the middle of her career path.“He said that my work was amazing and hilarious and smart and that he can’t wait to see me perform.So I had sex with him.”“My boyfriend asked me to change my look.To something other than contemptuous.”{BARGAIN} Whatever Hollywood ends up paying me for the rights to the story of my life.“It’s easier to go back to fantasizing about perfection . . .than to accept that perfection is just a fantasy.”“Boyfriend thinks I’d rather be right than happy.Boyfriend’s right.But I’m not telling him that.”Through blog entries, film scenes, poems, and to-do lists, Anita Liberty documents the perils and pitfalls of dating, sex, relationships, artistic success, and the kind of true love that sucks the creative life out of you to the point where you just end up staring at a blank computer screen and thinking gooey thoughts about your new boyfriend even though you should be writing.

    Illustrated with 16 pages of photographs.

    29 pages of chapter summaries, quotes, character analysis, themes, and more – everything you need to sharpen your knowledge of Naked. This detailed literature summary also contains Topics for Discussion and a Free Quiz on Naked by David Sedaris.

    Smart phones can make us look really dumb! Get this e-book and laugh your #@% off at what happens when you don't double-check before you hit send! Please Note: Some profanity, not for children!

    The commentary will contain background on the poems or more deeply delve into themes or topics discussed in the poems themselves. The spiritual seeker as well as the mature in faith will both benefit from the poems.

    It rejoices in men and women made of the Wrong Stuff: writers who believed in the power of words, but could never quite find the rights ones; artists and performers who indulged their creative impulse with a passion, if not a sense of the ridiculous, an eye for perspective or the ability to hold down a tune; scientists and businessmen who never quite managed to quit while they were ahead; and sportsmen who seemed to manage always to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. Like Walter Oudney, one of three men chosen to find the source of the River Niger in Africa, who could not ride a horse, nor speak any foreign languages and who had never travelled more than 30 miles beyond his native Edinburgh; or the explorer-priest Michel Alexandre de Baize, who set off to explore the African continent from east to west equipped with 24 umbrellas, some fireworks, two suits of armor, and a portable organ; or the Scottish army which decided to invade England in 1349 - during the Black Death. Entries include: briefest career in dentistry; least successful bonding exercise; most futile attempt to find a lost tribe; most pointless lines of research by someone who should have known better; least successful celebrity endorsement; least convincing excuse for a war; worst poetic tribute to a root vegetable; least successful display of impartiality by a juror; Devon Loch - sporting metaphor for blowing un unblowable lead; least dignified exit from office by a French president; and least successful expedition by camel.

    Meet the 38 stones man who has never flown before and stands fat chance of ever doing so. The man who thinks his distinct Turkish looks won't go down very with the locals in the Greek half of Cyprus. The passenger who wants to enjoy the flight with his inflatable rubber woman sat on his knee. The man who suspects his false teeth may have been stolen by one of the cabin crew. Meet these delightful people plus many, many more, and enjoy the funniest read you'll have had for ages. If you enjoyed the Henry Root Letters you'll love Dear Air 2000..

    Thanks to it, you will be able to UNLEASH the full power of your Amazon Echo, Echo Dot and Amazon Tap. AND you will find my email address at the end of the book, so feel free to ask me any questions you might have about Alexa. What is Amazon Echo Dot and Alexa Let me help you figure out what this this exciting technology is all about, so you can enjoy it too! Amazon Echo is a speaker connected to the internet that you can control with your voice. Alexa is the built-in vocal assistant of Amazon Echo. Alexa lets you play music, control your lights, ask for the weather and more. What you will learn: Step-by-step instructions on how to set up your device Get to know about all the things that Amazon Echo can do Get customized News, Traffic and Weather updates Connect your Google Calendar to your device Everything you need to know about Alexa in a single HIGH-QUALITY book Stream music from your favorite audio sources: iPhone, Android, Spotify, Amazon Music, Pandora, iHeartRadio, TuneIn Get ACTIONABLE ADVICE on how to build your smart home Control your lights, TV and room temperature with your voice Explore the complete list of Alexa-enabled devices organized per category Have fun by playing with 500 Easter Eggs Learn How IFTTT and Yonomi help you to better control your home Get to know the 20 most useful Alexa Skills Learn how Amazon Echo was created Written By An Alexa Lover For (future) Alexa Lovers How to troubleshoot your Echo Learn how Alexa works behind the scenes Explore the future of Alexa And much, much more! This is the only Amazon Echo book you will ever need Get your copy today! This book will save you hours figuring out how Echo works. I am sharing all my hacks so you can go from Beginner to Expert in an hour. I wish that upon reading this book, you will realise this exciting times that we live in. That you will see all the possibilities that the Amazon Echo has to offer. The time for innovation is now, and it is up to you to enjoy it now. Through the book, you will come to see Echo for what it is and what it can be. I am exploring in depth numerous topics such as Playing Music, Building your Smart Home, Using Alexa Skills and more. This book will help save you many hours trying to figure out what the Echo can do. Bonus Sign up to my free weekly newsletter to get the best new Alexa Skills in your inbox. Table of Contents 1. Preface 2. The Genesis of Amazon Echo 3. How Does Alexa Work? 4.

    Each chapter serves a different purpose. The chapters are For The Healing, For The Erasing, For the Loving, For the Oppressed, and For the Broken. This book teaches you to love yourself and others. It's better experienced than described, so sit down with some coffee and allow yourself to feel-- and heal.