Having longed for children since before she can remember, she was suddenly faced with an array of unfamiliar, unexpected and sometimes downright embarrassing emotional and physical reactions. And when Poppy (and a year later Daisy) was born she had to learn a whole new set of skills.From trying to conceive and a first positive pregnancy test to Poppy's first birthday, Minus Nine To One takes you through the worries, surprises, excitement, miracles and sheer bloody hard work that Jools - and all new mums in their own different ways - have to cope with along the way. As Jools writes, 'This certainly isn't meant to be read as a guidebook, or a medical reference book - it is simply my story and I hope that you can relate to it in some way (and maybe even relax with it in the bath!).'Down to earth, personal and very, very funny, this is the book no aspiring mother will want to be without.

    Offered for free by Apple and Touchstone, a trademark of Simon & Schuster Inc., contains selections from the two books mentioned in the title.

    Get paid to travel and write about it.Only no one told Jules that it would mean eating oily seabirds, repeatedly falling off a husky sled, getting stranded on a Mediterranean island, and crash-landing in Iran.The exotic destinations come thick and fast – Hong Kong, Hawaii, Huddersfield – as Jules navigates what it means to be a travel writer in a world with endless surprises up its sleeve.Add in a cast of larger-than-life characters – Elvis, Captain Cook, his own travel-mad Dad – and an eye for the ridiculous, and this journey with Jules is one you won’t want to miss.

    In a delightful mix of charm, cheek, and satire, Sykes returns to the glittering world of her New York Times bestselling debut Bergdorf Blondes to introduce the Debutante Divorces--high society's newly unwed heiresses.

    Thanks to it, you will be able to UNLEASH the full power of your Amazon Echo, Echo Dot and Amazon Tap. AND you will find my email address at the end of the book, so feel free to ask me any questions you might have about Alexa. What is Amazon Echo Dot and Alexa Let me help you figure out what this this exciting technology is all about, so you can enjoy it too! Amazon Echo is a speaker connected to the internet that you can control with your voice. Alexa is the built-in vocal assistant of Amazon Echo. Alexa lets you play music, control your lights, ask for the weather and more. What you will learn: Step-by-step instructions on how to set up your device Get to know about all the things that Amazon Echo can do Get customized News, Traffic and Weather updates Connect your Google Calendar to your device Everything you need to know about Alexa in a single HIGH-QUALITY book Stream music from your favorite audio sources: iPhone, Android, Spotify, Amazon Music, Pandora, iHeartRadio, TuneIn Get ACTIONABLE ADVICE on how to build your smart home Control your lights, TV and room temperature with your voice Explore the complete list of Alexa-enabled devices organized per category Have fun by playing with 500 Easter Eggs Learn How IFTTT and Yonomi help you to better control your home Get to know the 20 most useful Alexa Skills Learn how Amazon Echo was created Written By An Alexa Lover For (future) Alexa Lovers How to troubleshoot your Echo Learn how Alexa works behind the scenes Explore the future of Alexa And much, much more! This is the only Amazon Echo book you will ever need Get your copy today! This book will save you hours figuring out how Echo works. I am sharing all my hacks so you can go from Beginner to Expert in an hour. I wish that upon reading this book, you will realise this exciting times that we live in. That you will see all the possibilities that the Amazon Echo has to offer. The time for innovation is now, and it is up to you to enjoy it now. Through the book, you will come to see Echo for what it is and what it can be. I am exploring in depth numerous topics such as Playing Music, Building your Smart Home, Using Alexa Skills and more. This book will help save you many hours trying to figure out what the Echo can do. Bonus Sign up to my free weekly newsletter to get the best new Alexa Skills in your inbox. Table of Contents 1. Preface 2. The Genesis of Amazon Echo 3. How Does Alexa Work? 4.

    She is addicted to the feeling of being on stage, looking out at expectant, up-turned mouths, waiting for the first laugh to hit. A first laugh that will not happen unless she creates it. But Brenda is clueless. The on-off girlfriend of a prolific comedian, it is only after she realises his best stage material consists of recycled versions of her own restless, smart-arsed energy that she begins to wonder whether she might be better off keeping her jokes for herself - and so she finds herself making her very first walk to the mark on stage in front of a bare brick wall, with just a spotlight and a PA system for cover, wondering what we all wonder from time to time: am I funny? A book as much about the thrill of performance as it is about what goes on when the microphone is switched off, Brenda Monk is Funny is a blackly humourous and devastatingly candid snapshot of the reality, the brutality and fragility of the comedy industry from an exciting new voice in fiction.

    Home alone with her eccentric home-brewing father and a Jack Russell, she is just getting her life back on track when her job at the local museum is threatened by her first love and nemesis, Councillor David Barton, who intends to sell the beautiful old building to a pub chain. But help is at hand from her colleagues: Jackie, a former Greenham Common warrior; Tish, a flamboyant historian; and Carol, mega-flirt. Plus newcomer and former campaigner, Tom. Who happens to be a widower. And quite sexy. And also the owner of a Jack Russell. The key to saving the day and putting the town back on the tourist map could lie just within reach—when reaching for a cold gin and tonic, that is. Mother's Ruin to some, gin is the making of Jen when she comes together with her friends and family to save the museum and open an artisan distillery in the basement. With its debauched local history of smuggling, can gin be the town's savior and bring love back into Jen's life?

    GRITS Friends are Forevah shows you how to tell if you have true GRITS (Girls Raised in the South) friends in your life. Do you know what her nose looked like before she afixed her deviated septuma? Do you keep the secrets that even her husband doesnat know? Do you find yourself giggling with her though youare far too old to be behaving that way? From your first sorority rush to joining the local Red Hat society, and from long walks to long distance phone calls, a GRITS friend makes your victories sweeter, your laughter longer, and your pain gentler. Whether Deborah is talking about Instant GRITS (young girls), or Seasoned GRITS (women over sixty), childhood friends, newfound pals, sisters, mothers, or even BYOB (Be Your Own Best Friend), she has tips for keeping the laughs and love alive, GRITS-style.

     Bob and Amy Phillips and their four grown-up children run Lavender Cabs in the small Berkshire market town of Appleford. Everyone is involved. The business has grown – through three generations – into a thriving taxi and garage business. But when Bob is taken ill, he and Amy decide to retire to Devon, but to do this they would have to sell the business which would throw the entire family’s lives into turmoil…

    With hilarious anecdotes and irreverent observations, Karo captures the twentysomething experience like never before and answers the question, "Is there life after college?" Featuring the very best of his world-renowned email column as well as brand-new material published here for the first time, Ruminations on Twentysomething Life details Karo's evolution from frat boy to manhood and explores the frenzied lives of a generation living in the strange and unique gap between college and marriage. With his trademark acerbic wit, Karo ruminates on everything from your first day on the job to the last call at the bar. Perfect for students about to get their first dose of reality, twentysomethings procrastinating at work, or anyone who wants to relive their glory days, this book is sure to have readers laughing out loud and nodding their heads in agreement that there is indeed life after college.

    Housewives and corporate executives. Young professionals and those who are retired. No matter their professions or responsibilities, women of all ages and all walks of life often struggle with an all-consuming issue-self-image. We as Americans are continually obsessed with the grass-is-greener, anything-else-is-better-than-what -we-have philosophy. And that is never truer for women than when it comes to our bodies and our self-images. The media and the world around us tell us that we should be perfect in every way. But this kind of scrutiny and obsession with perfection leaves women feeling unloved, unattractive, frustrated, and even depressed.In The Real Me, contemporary Christian singer and songwriter Natalie Grant is on a mission to especially help young women deal with this struggle and to find acceptance in how God created them. And this struggle is something that Natalie understands fully-she gives the reader an inside look at her own struggle with image issues that led her on the path to bulimia. In acknowledging her pain and sharing her struggle, she offers practical help and hope to women of all ages.

    Note: These texting fails contain profanity, not for children.When are people going to learn that autocorrect can't be trusted? With FAILS like these, we actually hope that's not for a long time.This book complies 101 of the funniest, most viral and cringeworthy autocorrect screenshots to date.Guaranteed to put you on the floor laughing!

    Broken Bananah is my completely true and overly honest journey through severe genital trauma. What happens when you lose something you love? And... can you really break a penis? Absolutely, and mine was one of the worst on file. Tethered to a catheter and surrounded by that’s-what-she-said jokes, I learned one of life’s greatest lessons: it can always be worse. Experience life and love without a penis in a recovery story that could only happen in New York City. Let’s laugh til we cry, dive into the weird, and grapple with the power of sex in this modern coming-of-something tale.

    We promise to make you laugh and give you that much needed break in the middle of all the crazy.We have partnered with the most talented bunch of moms and dads to bring you the best, the funniest, and the most outrageous stories to get you from girth to birth.Are you having strange cravings? Have you asked yourself what in the hell is happening to my body? Have strangers touched your belly? If you've answered yes to any of these questions then this is the book for you! Prop up your cankles, grab a bowl of your favorite ice cream covered in olives and have a laugh with our crew. Things are about to get real.

    Yet through exploring the correlation between her depressive episodes and the basic elements of female nature, over many years she discovered that what she thought was a mental disorder was actually due to a hormonal imbalance. And the best bit? She learnt what she could do and take to control it.Shocking, vivid, and a must read for women, their partners and healthcare professionals alike, I Blame the Hormones is the uplifting memoir of Caroline’s journey to pull herself through despite all the odds.