Book picks similar to
Shh! It's a Secret: a novel about Aliens, Hollywood, and the Bartender's Guide by Daniel M. Kimmel
science-fiction
fiction
aliens
satire
Baseball Dads
Matthew S. Hiley - 2014
He’s had enough. He’s done with people living life wrong. You’ll do it right, or he’ll bury you under the bases at the ballpark where he coaches. It’s just that simple.Tired of poor decisions being made all around him, from the politics of player positions on his son's little league baseball team to the philandering of his wife in his own bedroom, Dwayne decides that breaking is better than bending. What follows is a wild ride full of carnage and revenge, led by a man who will stop at absolutely nothing to bring honor back to his family, his community… and children's baseball.Baseball Dads is a pitch black comedy in which one man takes on the duty of bludgeoning honor back into a sometimes dishonorable world.
Declination
David Derrico - 2002
Now, the Confederation's crises are spawned from within, and one brave woman struggles against all odds to keep mankind united amidst a hailstorm of rebellion, war, and moral declination.* * * * *The Lucani Ibron have yet to return, but all is not well within the Alpha Sector. Internal strife, terrorism, and ever-escalating conflicts with several neighboring species have spread the Confederation's resources dangerously thin. Captain Anastasia Mason, together with an eclectic group of humanity's most decorated heroes, struggles to hold the Confederation together against powerful forces that threaten to rip it apart at its very core. Then, at what appears to be mankind’s most desperate hour, an old enemy returns from a ten-year hiatus, casting humanity to the brink of civil war... and outright annihilation.
Stiletto Safari
Kate Metz - 2012
But when Zara’s boyfriend is accused of insider trading, her perfect world implodes.Thrown out of work by security and stalked by the press, Zara’s life can’t get any worse. Or can it? A snap decision (and a few wines too many) sees Zara fleeing to Africa to work as a temporary wildlife volunteer.But just when things start to cool down at home, Zara realizes her troubles have only just begun.Will Zara’s designer wardrobe survive?Will a supermodel ruin her only chance at happiness?Can a Birkin bag really solve her problems?And will Zara want her old life back at the end of it all…
Hybrid
Greg Ballan - 2007
Keener senses, heightened awareness and an enhanced physical strength that could be called upon by his sheer will. Erik becomes involved with a team of high profile investigators and local police trying to locate a girl who was kidnapped in the middle of a playground amongst dozens of adults and children. None of the adults saw anything and what the children claim to have seen is too far fetched to be believed. The search evolves into a full-scale manhunt into the dark and desolate woodlands of the Hopedale Mountain. After a lethal encounter and a fatality, Erik, the investigators and police realize that what they're dealing with isn't a man and possibly isn't of this world. What they're dealing with is a sentient evil that has an appetite for young children.
Alien Invasion of the Zombie Apocalypse
Ford Forkum - 2012
Landing dead center at a college campus swarming with zombies, the aliens soon realize that their abduction mission is going to be quite a bit more complicated than they'd imagined. The presence of vampires only makes the situation worse.Will the human race prevail or be forced to relocate to an alien planet? Is there any way to reverse the zombie plague? Is the plague contagious to aliens and can an alien be turned into a vampire? What if a vampire alien became a zombie, then was bitten by a radioactive spider and then possessed by the ghost of a robot werewolf? That last part doesn't happen in the story, but what if it did? Find out what becomes of humanity in this hodgepodge of dystopian absurdity.
Stella Rose
Tammy Flanders Hetrick - 2015
But Abby struggles to connect with Olivia and she soon finds guardianship of a headstrong teenager daunting beyond her wildest misgivings. Despite her best efforts, and the help of friends old and new, she is unable to keep Olivia from self-destruction. As Abby’s journey unfolds, she grapples with raising a grieving teenager, realizes she didn’t know Stella as well as she thought, and discovers just how far she will go to save the most precious thing in her life.
Ghosts/Aliens
Trey Hamburger - 2008
On Saturday, March 8, at 7:12 p.m., Trey Hamburger heard a second hand account of a teleporting Hot Pocket and started wiggin' out bad. So he and his amigo Mike Stevens basically went into combat mode and ended up encountering some of the most seriously messed-up shit ever. And they're STILL FREAKED OUT ABOUT IT. Now, even though these guys aren't SCIENTISTS, it's pretty for sure that they might have extrapolated something HUGE, which will have the intellectual community going nuts for weeks.This is their story.Ghost/Aliens is probably the first time ever a regular person has investigated this sort of thing. So now the people of planet Earth will finally know the truth about all those levitating towels and dead grandpas popping up all over the place.
Fractured Light
Nick Cook - 2018
THEY UNCOVERED A THREAT TO EVERY PERSON ON THE PLANET.
NOW AN INVISIBLE ENEMY IS HUNTING THEM DOWN.
What would you do if you started to see something lurking in the shadows of our everyday world? That's the reality that Jake Stevens has been pitched into and now he’s questioning his sanity.Jake’s been an outsider in his hometown Stoneham, England, ever since his life was shattered when his father's experiment into dark energy exploded, killing himself and many others.When Jake witnesses a satellite crash-landing, and starts to receive garbled messages that hint at a conspiracy, a chain of events is unleashed that will threaten the very existence of all life on Earth in a dystopian nightmare.Can Jake, and the best friend that he froze out of his life, Chloe Haze, a coding genius who’s heavily entrenched with the underground hacking network, figure out the connections of the mystery that link all the events before it’s too late?Fractured Light is the first volume in the Fractured Light trilogy, and is also part of the Multiverse Chronicles, an epic series of interlinked stories that follows the struggle of humanity to survive across parallel universes.
If you love books by Michael Grant and Robert J Crane, or adore series like Stranger Things and Fringe, then this page-turning smart sci-fi thriller, is for you.
Gripped: Your Personality is What's Holding You Back
Jason Donnelly - 2013
Have you ever read an advertisement and felt like it was written directly to you? Well, what if it was? And if I told you that there's an underground group telling you and those around you what to buy, what to wear, and what to consume? Join the fun. The only thing holding you back is your own personality.We recommend that you read Gripped with a nice bottled water. "If Kurt Vonnegut and Sarah Silverman had a literary offspring, it might look something like this." Richard Thomas, authoe of Staring Into the Abyss"Donnelly dances on the line of comedic grace and brutal honesty to show how ugly personal growth can be." Michael Paul Gonzalez, author of Angel Falls"This is a hilarious yet poignant tale of how disjointed society has become." Jonny Gibbings, author of Malice in BlunderlandJason Donnelly is a writer in NYC currently seeking world domination. He has an MFA in creative writing and a horrible amount of debt from a University in Pennsylvania that shall not be named. Over the years, he's held the title of juggler, college recruiter, adjunct professor, headhunter and is currently a copywriter at a NYC ad agency. Find out more than you ever wanted to know about him here, www.jasonwdonnelly.com and then like the book page here, www.grippedbook.com You can now purchase from amazon.com here: http://www.amazon.com/Gripped-Your-Pe...
Checking Inn
Emily Harper - 2013
Make sure the caterers don't serve devil's food cake to the Christian Women's Alliance- check. Tell my mother that having a séance to get rid of any unwanted spirits in the kitchen during dinnertime is not okay- check. Send a friendly reminder to all staff that the pens are colour coded for everyone's enjoyment, and therefore it is not a good idea to put them all in one jar in order to spice things up as was anonymously suggested- check. But, when an acclaimed hotel critic dies at the Inn, just before she's about to publish a scathing review that would ruin the business, Kate's life and checklists are thrown into disarray. And it doesn't help matters that the detective assigned to the case is messy, unorganized, and too charming for his own good. Now Kate has to prove her innocence and save her Inn, or else the only thing that she'll be organizing is the prison's next bake sale.
Hey Cowboy, Wanna Get Lucky?
Baxter Black - 1994
These modern-day cowpokes--two chivalrous knights of the rope and range with a hankering for bucking broncos and for the female of the two-legged species--find much more than they bargained for in Oklahoma City. Against the colorful, flamboyant backdrop of the hard-ridin', hard-playin' rodeo circuit, they encounter a city woman named Lilac, with whom Cody falls in love; a bull named Kamikaze; and two corrupt Texas billionaires who bet against Lick. In the vein of a latter-day Will Rogers, Baxter Black combines a colorful yarn with occasional bits of his unique cowboy philosophy and poetry."It could make a dead man sit up and laugh"--The Washington Post Book World
Strange Times: The Ghost In The Girl
Tom DeLonge - 2016
Now teamed-up with Geoff Herbach, the award-winning author of the Felton Reinstein Trilogy, DeLonge reveals the secret origin of how the five phantom hunters first banded together against the forces of darkness… Charlie Wilkins has it all. Pitcher on the baseball team, point guard on the basketball team, good jock friends and girls who just love him. Then his U.S. Air Force dad goes M.I.A. during a secret mission and Charlie falls into darkness. He quits basketball, pushes away his old friends who all seem so stupid. He stops talking. Nobody knows what he’s going through, because the government has forbidden the family from disclosing Dad’s predicament. Charlie turns into a loner, until an Earth Science assignment forces him to join a new, messed-up team. Wiz has a brain for science, a love for steampunk, and a total disgust for most human beings. Heavy-set, picked-on Riley has a home life Harry Potter wouldn’t trade for. Mouse and Mattheson are skateboard slackers with a keen interest in tacos and in building a model volcano that looks like a butt. With zero chemistry between them, Charlie can’t see how he’s going to pass this class. Will he be stuck, suffering, in eighth grade forever? The earth shifts. It seems impossible. A ghost girl reaches out to Charlie through the terrified skater boys. She’s being stalked by a vengeful spirit that shares a past with Charlie’s family. It soon becomes clear that the spirit is coming for him. He has to save the ghost girl and save himself. His only hope? The nerd Wiz, the loser Riley, the skaters Mouse and Mattheson who want to hook-up with the girl. But, seriously, she’s a ghost. Strange Times indeed…
Rowdy in Paris
Tim Sandlin - 2008
Rowdy Talbot isn't the world's greatest bull rider. Not even close. But he lives by the cowboy code, and he never forgets to take off his cowboy hat during the national anthem. When Rowdy wins the rodeo in Crockett County, Colorado, he celebrates his triumph with two young Frenchwomen he meets in a local bar. The next morning, when he discovers that the two have left for Paris with the championship belt buckle he won, Rowdy does what any true cowboy would: he hops on a plane to the City of Light to retrieve it. What follows is a comic collision of cultures and personalities. In Rowdy in Paris, Tim Sandlin has concocted an unlikely but engaging mélange of characters: disaffected French revolutionaries, a turquoise-peddling CIA operative, and a middle-aged courtesan, all caught in a plot to destroy an American fast-food chain. At the center of the chaos is Rowdy himself, who finds as he searches for the belt buckle that there's another world beyond the back of a bull. By turns smart and satirical, biting and engaging, Rowdy in Paris is a surprisingly moving story about what it means to broaden one's horizons by opening one's heart.
Year Zero
Rob Reid - 2012
But Frampton and Carly are highly advanced (if bumbling) extraterrestrials. And boy, do they have news. The entire cosmos, they tell him, has been hopelessly hooked on humanity’s music ever since “Year Zero” (1977 to us), when American pop songs first reached alien ears. This addiction has driven a vast intergalactic society to commit the biggest copyright violation since the Big Bang. The resulting fines and penalties have bankrupted the whole universe. We humans suddenly own everything—and the aliens are not amused. Nick now has forty-eight hours to save humanity, while hopefully wowing the hot girl who lives down the hall from him.
The Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe
Conor Lastowka - 2018
So far her only option is an invitation from some upperclassmen to watch them drunkenly race a bunch of bullfrogs in a ditch. To be honest, she was hoping for something a bit more exciting.Her grandfather, Cornelius Everglades, is a renegade who founded his own island micronation. Unfortunately, the rest of the world refuses to acknowledge it (possibly because he’s gone about the nation-building process using wildly illegal and unethical means).When Cornelius shows up at Kara’s door needing her help and promising an adventure, Kara agrees to go along with his far-fetched plan to put his micronation on the map, even though a) she thought Cornelius was dead, and b) his scheme depends heavily on Kara wearing a mascot costume.If Kara had known about the giant alien spaceship currently speeding toward her grandfather’s country with the intent to subjugate and humiliate mankind, she might have reconsidered.