Smart phones can make us look really dumb! Get this e-book and laugh your #@% off at what happens when you don't double-check before you hit send! Please Note: Some profanity, not for children!

     "Before I wrote this book, I was diagnosed as MORBIDLY OBESE by my primary-care physician following a yearly visit. The only problem with this diagnosis was that we never discussed this issue. I knew that I was overweight, but it wasn't until I switched doctors and picked up my medical records that I saw this in writing. I saw myself in front of the mirror every day, so I knew things were bad, but it wasn't until I read those words, MORBIDLY OBESE, that the gravity of the situation sunk in." -LAURA SINCLAIR At 55, Laura Sinclair was grossly overweight; the future looked dim and dangerous. Carrying extra weight was setting her up for the possibility of developing a chronic illness--heart disease, stroke, or worse. She decided to take ownership of her life and pave a new road to optimum health and happiness. -Learn how Laura lost over 40% of her body weight and kept it off. -How she reached a level of fitness and athleticism that she thought not possible in her 50s and beyond.

    From the first day he hit a minor league catcher with a pool table to the fateful day baseball called him out on a strike, Kaiser was one of the game's most popular and colorful characters. And in this autobiography-written with the co-author of Ron Luciano's classic bestseller The Umpire Strikes Back - Kaiser brings to life his wild adventures from the pro wrestling arena to the baseball diamond.This is the hysterically true story of four decades of baseball as lived and loved on the playing field, from Ted Williams and Billy Martin to Derek Jeter and Mark McGwire, from one-eyed umpires to space-age technology. And as he did throughout his long and sometimes controversial career, the larger-than-his-chest-protector Kaiser called 'em as he saw 'em.

    Note: These texting fails contain profanity, not for children.When are people going to learn that autocorrect can't be trusted? With FAILS like these, we actually hope that's not for a long time.This book complies 101 of the funniest, most viral and cringeworthy autocorrect screenshots to date.Guaranteed to put you on the floor laughing!

    In a career spanning forty years, Barry has worked alongside the greatest producers and performers in show business: Tommy Cooper, Humphrey Lyttelton, Morecambe and Wise, Willie Rushton, Peter Cook, Kenny Everett, Rory Bremner to name but a few - this book is a veritable Who's Who of comedy.From humble beginnings at the Windmill Theatre and Expresso Bongo, to The Frost Report, Call My Bluff and I'm Sorry I haven't a Clue, Barry recalls the good, the bad, and the downright ugly in his own inimitable style.'Barry Cryer ...an anecdote jukebox whose whole life is basically one big chatshow.'Guardian

    Throughout the shift, the dispatcher is faced with stabbings, robberies, medical calls, fights, and a variety of other calls. There is no telling what the next call will bring. Some of the calls faced by the dispatcher are heinous, some are tragic, and some are a complete waste of time.You will get to see what life is really like for a 911 dispatcher. While some of the details have been modified to protect the identity of those involved, this books was inspired by true and actual calls handled by a 911 dispatcher.Warning: This book contains some adult language and topics.

    . . Brilliant. I advise anyone to go and read it' Louise Redknapp_______From X Factor star to Queen of the Jungle, Stacey Solomon has never been far from our screens . . .As a kid, Stacey always dreamed of becoming a star. But at 17, it looked like her dream was shattered when she unexpectedly became pregnant.Always the fighter, new single mum Stacey rallied, found a college with a crèche for her son Zachery and waitressed at night, determined that he should have the opportunities she didn't.And then the X Factor came along, where she stunned Britain with her astonishing voice. She went from hard-up single mum to X Factor favourite, Queen of the Jungle and much-loved TV presenter in just two years.Stacey Solomon's My Story So Far is a fantastic and inspirational read by a modern-day heroine who always looks on the bright side of life._______'Stacey has charmed that nation with her down-to-earth personality and irrepressible spirit' Sunday Mirror'She's hilariously dizzy yet whip-smart. She's a treat' Scotsman'She has a warm smile, an infectious laugh and a heart of gold' Love It

    Because it was extremely difficult to verbalize the events to her own children years later, her adult family knew very little of the details until 30 years after her passing in 1967. That is when her granddaughter discovered her writings and promised to tell the story of what she endured.

    to LondonOCothe professional dancer's extraordinaryajourney to the glitzy world of ballroomWith his slick moves, calm demeanor, and brooding good looks, Pasha Kovalev has becomeaa senation as a popular dancer. His talent and determination have taken him around the world, but as he shares here, it was the stark, grey landscape of his Siberian hometown, still reeling from the Communist regime, which provided the unlikely inspiration for his early love of ballroom dancing. With a strongadesire to succeed, he moved to theaU.S. in 2001awith his professional dance partner Anya Garnis and settled in Fort Lee, New Jersey.aHe auditioned for seasonathree of "So You Think You Can Dance "in 2007, amoved to L.A. in 2008, aand heahas since participated in all following seasons as either a choreographer or an All Star. Froma2009-2011ahe joined the cast of Jason Gilkison's production "Burn the Floor," one of the leading ballroom based shows in the world, during its stint on Broadway. In September 2011, Pasha joined the BBC's "Strictly Come Dancing" as the new professional dancer of the ninth season, abeing partnered in the 10th season with Girls Aloud star Kimberley Walsh. He speaks candidly in this heartwarming autobiography, on topics from romance to body image to the illness that nearly killed him. Most of all, he gives readers a glimpse behind the scenes of the flashy world of ballroom, and what really goes on beneath the veneer of sparkles and glamour."

    The book describes his zany squadron mates in the C-130 and their travels around the world; then his experiences teaching students to fly high performance jets. He reached his goal and details what it was like to fly the world's most exotic aircraft.

    Bob Smith, founded Alcoholics Anonymous in 1935, his hope was that AA would become a safe haven for those who suffered from this disease. Thirty years after his death, AA continues to help millions of alcoholics recover from what had been commonly regarded as a hopeless addiction. Still, while Wilson was a visionary for millions, he was no saint. After cofounding Alcoholics Anonymous, he stayed sober for over thirty-five years, helping countless thousands rebuild their lives. But at the same time, Wilson suffered form debilitating bouts of clinical depression, was a womanizer, and experimented with LSD.Francis Hartigan, the former secretary and confidant to Wilson's wife, Lois, has exhaustively researched his subject, writing with a complete insider's knowledge. Drawing on extensive interviews with Lois Wilson and scores of early members of AA, he fully explores Wilson's organizational genius, his devotion to the cause, and almost martyr-like selflessness. That Wilson, like all of us, had to struggle with his own personal demons makes this biography all the more moving and inspirational. Hartigan reveals the story of Wilson's life to be as humorous, horrific, and powerful as any of the AA vignettes told daily around the world.

    Everyone needs them. Especially when relations between you and your family are less than perfect. And for the talented and ambitious Janet Street-Porter, her friends became her family. is the story of these vibrant characters – some famous, some infamous, all extraordinary – and their often volatile relationships with her. Above all, it is a portrait of an exciting and creative era, by someone who lived it to the full.

    

    He did not claim he was God’s agent. Did he believe in God? Did he look for a sign when he was desperate? Did he follow the Divine Will? Many believers are not followers; many followers are not believers. Is he a believer or a follower or both?

    Follow one veterinarian's story through the course of her career and experience the dramas, the traumas and the comedies that regularly take place in a veterinary emergency room. Become privy to some of the authors most humorous, shocking and hackle-raising encounters with animals and overhear some of the more memorable conversations that she has had with owners throughout her years of practice. Follow her through her foreign travels and learn how modern veterinary medicine far exceeds the medical care that is available in these third world countries.Bite Me gives a rare insider's view of the frustrations, the joys and the heartbreak that veterinarians experience on a daily basis and exposes the reasons why the veterinary profession is currently facing some dire and frightening challenges. From page to page you will find yourself laughing, crying, angry, shocked, laughing again, and then eager to know more.Bite Me is a must-read for any pet owner, any person aspiring to be a veterinarian, any veterinary student, and any person who has an interest in the welfare of both animals and people.