Before purchasing, borrowing, or stealing this book, you should be aware that it contains the answers to some of those questions, such as the following:1. Who is Lemony?2. Is there a secret organization I should know about?3. Why does Lemony Snicket spend his time researching and writing distressing books concerning the Baudelaire orphans?4. Why do all of Lemony Snicket's books contain a sad dedication to a woman named Beatrice?5. If there's nothing out there, what was that noise?Our advice to you is that you find a book that answers less upsetting questions than this one. Perhaps your librarian, bookseller, or parole officer can recommend a book that answers the question, "Aren't ponies adorable?"

    Welcome to reality: royal genealogy lessons, needlepoint, acting like "a proper lady," and—worst of all—a prince who is not the least bit interesting, and certainly not charming. As soon-to-be princess Ella deals with her new-found status, she comes to realize she is not "your majesty" material. But breaking off a royal engagement is no easy feat, especially when you're crushing on another boy in the palace... For Ella to escape, it will take intelligence, determination, and spunk—and no ladylike behavior allowed.

    . . Once upon a time my brother and I were normal kids. The next minute? The mirror in our basement slurped us up and magically transported us inside Snow White's fairy tale. I know it sounds crazy, but it's true.But hey -- we're heroes! We stopped Snow White from eating the poisoned apple. Hooray! Or not. If Snow White doesn't die, she won't get to meet her prince. And then she won't get her happy ending. Oops. Now it's up to us to:- Avoid getting poisoned- Sneak into a castle- Fix Snow White's storyBut Snow White's REAL happy ending might not be quite what we expected . . .

    Mattotti's sweeping ink illustrations capture the terror and longing found in the classic Brothers Grimm fairy tale. Gaiman crafts an original text filled with his signature wit and pathos that is sure to become a favorite of readers everywhere, young and old.

    Come join in the 20th-anniversary fun as gnomania strikes again!Did you know that gnome couples always have twin children? Or that a gnome is seven times as strong as a human? Do you want to hear some gossip from the gnome who knew Rembrandt? Dutch artist Rien Poortvliet's charming illustrations and physician Wil Huygen's detailed observations of the gnomes' habits, anatomy, and lifestyle are a delight for readers of all ages. Children will adore the gnome family's underground home and the constant interaction with animals; adults will appreciate the tongue-in-cheek scientific data. Gnomebody is immune to the gnomes' tremendous appeal--and a whole new generation is waiting to love them for the first time!

    In this modern twist on the classic story, Cinderella, who would rather just be Ella, meets her fairy godmother, goes to a ball, and makes friends with a prince. But that is where the familiar story ends. Instead of waiting to be rescued, Cinderella learns that she can save herself and those around her by being true to herself and standing up for what she believes.

    Cinder Edna was forced to work for her wicked stepmother and stepsisters, just as her neighbor, Cinderella, was.Edna, on the other hand, had learned a thing or two from doing all that housework, such as how to make tuna casserole sixteen different ways and how to get spots off everything from rugs to ladybugs. And she was strong and spunky and knew some good jokes.Then one day the king announced that he would give a ball ...

    That is, until the day a strange green sprite leads him to Gawain, King Arthur's nephew, who is on his way to Camelot hoping to be knighted. Trevisant can see the future and knows that Terence must leave to serve as Gawain's squire. From that moment on, Terence's life is filled with heart-stopping adventure as he helps damsels-in-distress, fights battles with devious men, and protects King Arthur from his many enemies. Along the way, Terence is amazed at his skills and new-found magical abilities. Were these a gift from his unknown parents? As Gawain continues his quest for knighthood, Terence searches for answers to the riddles in his own past.

    When Gwennie pricks her finger and the whole castle falls asleep, only Annie is awake, and only Annie-blessed (or cursed?) with being impervious to magic-can venture out beyond the rose-covered hedge for help. She must find Gwen's true love to kiss her awake.But who is her true love? The irritating Digby? The happy-go-lucky Prince Andreas, who is holding a contest to find his bride? The conniving Clarence, whose sinister motives couldn't possibly spell true love? Joined by one of her father's guards, Liam, who happened to be out of the castle when the sleeping spell struck, Annie travels through a fairy tale land populated with characters both familiar and new as she tries to fix her sister and her family . . . and perhaps even find a true love of her own.

    A he said/she said series with a prince and princess twist.Rapunzel is having the ultimate bad day. She's been stolen from home by an evil witch, locked in an incredibly high tower, and doesn't even have a decent brush for her hair. Prince Benjamin is in a pretty uncomfortable situation himself. His father wants him to be more kingly, his mother wants him to never leave her sight, and his cousin wants to get him into as much trouble as possible. Plus, there's the little matter of prearranged marriages. . . . Both Rapunzel and Prince Benjamin are trapped--in very different ways. It's only when their paths cross, that things really start to change.

    Maybe it’s true. But what is he now? A terrifying monster running wild in the sewers? The Daily Scourge is sure of it. A victim of “Rodent Delusion”? The hospital nurse says yes. A lucrative fairground freak? He is to Mr. Tapscrew. A champion wriggler and a budding thief? That’s what Billy thinks. Or just an ordinary small boy, though a little ratty in his habits? Only three people believe this version of the story. And it may take a royal intervention—and a bit of magic—to convince the rest of the world.Set against the backdrop of a Royal Wedding—and a playful parody of the press, I Was a Rat! is a magical weaving of humor, fairy tale, and adventure.

    After the mysterious disappearance of their parents, the sisters are sent to live with their grandmother--a woman they believed was dead! Granny Relda reveals that the girls have two famous ancestors, the Brothers Grimm, whose classic book of fairy tales is actually a collection of case files of magical mischief. Now the girls must take on the family responsibility of being fairy tale detectives.

    As readers follow the siblings through a forest brimming with menacing foes, they learn the true story behind (and beyond) the bread crumbs, edible houses, and outwitted witches. Fairy tales have never been more irreverent or subversive as Hansel and Gretel learn to take charge of their destinies and become the clever architects of their own happily ever after.

    But only the girl who proves she can see him will be his bride. The two beautiful but spoiled daughters of a poor village man try their best to be chosen, but it is their Rough-Face-Girl sister, scarred on her face and arms from tending fires, who sees the Invisible Being in the wonder of the natural world.The dramatic illustrations reflect the vibrant earth colors of the native landscape and the wisdom and sensitivity of the protagonist.

    Why does elf + elf = fool? How many meals will Miss Mush, the lunch teacher, have to cook for the food to taste as bad as it smells? This book is packed full of brain teasers and maths puzzles and all the wacky pupils from Wayside School to help you find the logical solutions to all the problems.