Why Have Kids?: A New Mom Explores the Truth About Parenting and Happiness


Jessica Valenti - 2012
    She moves beyond the black and white “mommy wars” over natural parenting, discipline, and work-life balance to explore a more nuanced reality: one filled with ambivalence, joy, guilt, and exhaustion.    Would-be parents must navigate the decision to have children amidst a daunting combination of cultural expectations and hard facts. And new parents find themselves struggling to reconcile their elation with the often exhausting, confusing, and expensive business of child care. When researchers for a 2010 Pew study asked parents why they decided to have their first child, nearly 90 percent answered, for “the joy of having children.” Yet nearly every study in the last ten years shows a marked decline in the life satisfaction of those with kids.  Valenti explores this disconnect between parents’ hopes and the day-to-day reality of raising children—revealing all the ways mothers and fathers are quietly struggling. A must-read for parents as well as those considering starting a family, Why Have Kids? is an explosive addition to the conversation about modern parenthood.

Your Baby's First Year


Steven P. Shelov - 1998
    Revised and updated, including two new chapters on sleep and allergies, Your Baby’s First Year provides authoritative advice on all aspects of infant care, including • expanded sections on raising twins, multiples, and children with autism• new material on prebiotics, probiotics, and the Tdap vaccine• a month-to-month guide to your baby’s first year with vital facts on growth, behavior, and development• a complete health encyclopedia covering illnesses, injuries, and disabilities• advice on breastfeeding, bottle-feeding, and introducing solids• guidelines for choosing a child care provider• safety checks for home and car, including a car safety seat shopping guide• And much more     Comprehensive, reassuring, and up-to-date, Your Baby’s First Year is an indispensable guide for all parents who want to provide the very best care for their baby.

Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect


Jonice Webb - 2012
    It is about what didn't happen in your childhood, what wasn't said, and what cannot be remembered. Do you sometimes feel as if you're just going through the motions in life? Are you good at looking and acting as if you're fine, but secretly feel lonely and disconnected? Perhaps you have a fine life and are good at your work, but somehow it's just not enough to make you happy. If so, you are not alone. The world is full of people who have an innate sense that something is wrong with them. Who feel they live on the outside looking in, but have no explanation for their feeling and no way to put it into words. Who blame themselves for not being happier. If you are one of these people, you may fear that you are not connected enough to your spouse, or that you don't feel pleasure or love as profoundly as others do. Perhaps when you do experience strong emotions, you have difficulty understanding or tolerating them. You may drink too much, or eat too much, or risk too much, in an attempt to feel something good. In over twenty years of practicing psychology, many people have arrived in Jonice Webb's office, driven by the threat of divorce or the onset of depression, or by loneliness, and said, "Something is missing in me."Running on Empty will give you clear strategies for how to heal, and offers a special chapter for mental health professionals. In the world of human suffering, this book is an Emotional Smart Bomb meant to eradicate the effects of an invisible enemy.

Magic Trees of the Mind: How to Nurture Your Child's Intelligence, Creativity, and Healthy Emotions from Birth Through Adolescence


Marian C. Diamond - 1998
    At each stage of development, the brain's ability to gain new skills and process information is refined.As a leading researcher at the University of California at Berkeley, Marion Diamond has been a pioneer in this field of research. Now, Diamond and award-winning science writer Janet Hopson present a comprehensive enrichment program designed to help parents prepare their children for a lifetime of learning.

It's OK Not to Share and Other Renegade Rules for Raising Competent and Compassionate Kids


Heather Shumaker - 2012
    In this inspiring and enlightening book, Heather Shumaker describes her quest to nail down “the rules” to raising smart, sensitive, and self-sufficient kids. Drawing on her own experiences as the mother of two small children, as well as on the work of child psychologists, pediatricians, educators and so on, in this book Shumaker gets to the heart of the matter on a host of important questions. Hint: many of the rules aren’t what you think they are!The “rules” in this book focus on the toddler and preschool years—an important time for laying the foundation for competent and compassionate older kids and then adults. Here are a few of the rules:    • It’s OK if it’s not hurting people or property    • Bombs, guns and bad guys allowed.    • Boys can wear tutus.    • Pictures don’t have to be pretty.    • Paint off the paper!    • Sex ed starts in preschool    • Kids don’t have to say “Sorry.”    • Love your kid’s lies. IT’S OK NOT TO SHARE is an essential resource for any parent hoping to avoid PLAYDATEGATE (i.e. your child’s behavior in a social interaction with another child clearly doesn’t meet with another parent’s approval)!

Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love


Amir Levine - 2010
    F. Heller reveal how an understanding of attachment theory-the most advanced relationship science in existence today-can help us find and sustain love. Attachment theory forms the basis for many bestselling books on the parent/child relationship, but there has yet to be an accessible guide to what this fascinating science has to tell us about adult romantic relationships-until now.Attachment theory owes its inception to British psychologist and psychoanalyst John Bowlby, who in the 1950s examined the tremendous impact that our early relationships with our parents or caregivers has on the people we become. Also central to attachment theory is the discovery that our need to be in a close relationship with one or more individuals is embedded in our genes.In Attached, Levine and Heller trace how these evolutionary influences continue to shape who we are in our relationships today. According to attachment theory, every person behaves in relationships in one of three distinct ways:*ANXIOUS people are often preoccupied with their relationships and tend to worry about their partner's ability to love them back.*AVOIDANT people equate intimacy with a loss of independence and constantly try to minimize closeness.*SECURE people feel comfortable with intimacy and are usually warm and loving.Attached guides readers in determining what attachment style they and their mate (or potential mates) follow. It also offers readers a wealth of advice on how to navigate their relationships more wisely given their attachment style and that of their partner. An insightful look at the science behind love, Attached offers readers a road map for building stronger, more fulfilling connections.

A Joyful Mother of Children: The Magic and Mayhem of Motherhood


Linda Eyre - 1983
    Eyre. And she ought to know. A mother of nine, Linda Eyre provides valuable insight to the hardest yet most rewarding career of all - Motherhood.

Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself


Nedra Glover Tawwab - 2021
    We all know we should have them--in order to achieve work/life balance, cope with toxic people, and enjoy rewarding relationships with partners, friends, and family. But what do healthy boundaries really mean--and how can we successfully express our needs, say no, and be assertive without offending others?Licensed counselor, sought-after relationship expert, and one of the most influential therapists on Instagram Nedra Glover Tawwab demystifies this complex topic for today's world. In a relatable and inclusive tone, Set Boundaries, Find Peace presents simple-yet-powerful ways to establish healthy boundaries in all aspects of life. Rooted in the latest research and best practices used in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), these techniques help us identify and express our needs clearly and without apology--and unravel a root problem behind codependency, power struggles, anxiety, depression, burnout, and more.

Bright From the Start: The Simple, Science-Backed Way to Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind from Birth to Age 3


Jill Stamm - 2007
    Jill Stamm's daughter was born almost four months premature, and doctors insisted she would never walk or talk. Now, thirty-two years later, her daughter is living proof that nearly every baby's brain has the potential to adapt and flourish given the right attention. A leading authority in infant brain development, she makes new, remarkable findings accessible to everyone in Bright from the Start. What babies need is as simple as A, B, C: ATTENTION: including how to increase a child's attention span, and how to balance stimulation with down time BONDING: illustrating the importance of developing emotional attachment between a child and a consistent caregiver, and why this is key to cognitive development COMMUNICATION: with breakthrough advice for tapping the correlation between verbal engagement with parents and higher IQ rates among children She also discusses what kind of childcare environment to select, why learning toys don't teach as much as you think, why reading to a baby is critical, and how you can help your child learn how to pay attention. By working with Dr. Stamm's ABCs in Bright from the Start, all parents can help to build a radiant future for their precious little ones.

What's Going On in There? How the Brain and Mind Develop in the First Five Years of Life


Lise Eliot - 1999
    But it wasn't until she was pregnant with her first child that she became intrigued with the study of brain development. She wanted to know precisely how the baby's brain is formed, and when and how each sense, skill, and cognitive ability is developed. And just as important, she was interested in finding out how her role as a nurturer can affect this complex process. How much of her baby's development is genetically ordained--and how much is determined by environment? Is there anything parents can do to make their babies' brains work better--to help them become smarter, happier people? Drawing upon the exploding research in this field as well as the stories of real children, What's Going On in There? is a lively and thought-provoking book that charts the brain's development from conception through the critical first five years. In examining the many factors that play crucial roles in that process, What's Going On in There? explores the evolution of the senses, motor skills, social and emotional behaviors, and mental functions such as attention, language, memory, reasoning, and intelligence. This remarkable book also discusses:         how a baby's brain is "assembled" from scratch the critical prenatal factors that shapebrain development how the birthing process itself affects the brain which forms of stimulation are most effective at promoting cognitive development how boys' and girls' brains develop differently how nutrition, stress, and other physical and social factors can permanently affect a child's brain Brilliantly blending cutting-edge science with a mother's wisdom and insight, What's Going On in There? is an invaluable contribution to the nature versus nurture debate. Children's development is determined both by the genes they are born with and the richness of their early environment. This timely and important book shows parents the innumerable ways in which they can actually help their children grow better brains.

Your Baby's First Year: Week By Week (Your Pregnancy Series)


Glade B. Curtis - 2000
    Thoroughly updated and expanded to reflect the latest pediatric guidelines and recommendations, Your Baby's First Year Week by Week includes helpful charts and illustrations to help parents understand what they are witnessing and how to care for their baby in a way that supports and encourages his growth. Highlighting the milestones of a baby's social, emotional, intellectual, and physical development on a weekly basis, the book also advises on: Common medical problems Bonding Diapering and dressing baby properly Introducing first foods Playing with baby to develop cognitive, social, and motor skills Sleeping habits Baby gear-carriers, highchairs, swings, cribs Talking to baby

The Mother Dance: How Children Change Your Life


Harriet Lerner - 1998
    Written from her dual perspective as a psychologist and a mother, Lerner brings us deeply personal tales that run the gamut from the hilarious to the heart-wrenching. From birth or adoption to the empty nest, The Mother Dance teaches the basic lessons of motherhood: that we are not in control of what happens to our children, that most of what we worry about doesn't happen, and that our children will love us with all our imperfections if we can do the same for them. Here is a gloriously witty and moving book about what it means to dance the mother dance.

The Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting


Laurence Steinberg - 2004
    In The Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting, Dr. Steinberg distills decades of research into a parenting book that explains the fundamentals of raising happy, healthy children, giving readers an invaluable map to help them navigate parenthood from infancy to adolescence.Dr. Steinberg found that the basic principles for effective parenting are simple and universal, and apply to all parents and children regardless of background. He explains each principle and shows how to put it into action, using anecdotes and examples: from “What You Do Matters” (parents make an enormous difference; children are not simply the product of their genes) to “Establish Rules and Limits” (how to provide structure in your child's life, and how to handle conflicts over rules) and “Help Foster Your Child's Independence” (help your child think through decisions instead of making them for him or her). Concise and authoritative, written with warmth and compassion, The Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting is an intelligent guide to raising a happy, healthy child and to becoming a happier, more confident parent in the process.

The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma


Bessel van der Kolk - 2014
    Veterans and their families deal with the painful aftermath of combat; one in five Americans has been molested; one in four grew up with alcoholics; one in three couples have engaged in physical violence. Such experiences inevitably leave traces on minds, emotions, and even on biology. Sadly, trauma sufferers frequently pass on their stress to their partners and children. Renowned trauma expert Bessel van der Kolk has spent over three decades working with survivors. In The Body Keeps the Score, he transforms our understanding of traumatic stress, revealing how it literally rearranges the brain’s wiring—specifically areas dedicated to pleasure, engagement, control, and trust. He shows how these areas can be reactivated through innovative treatments including neurofeedback, mindfulness techniques, play, yoga, and other therapies. Based on Dr. van der Kolk’s own research and that of other leading specialists, The Body Keeps the Score offers proven alternatives to drugs and talk therapy—and a way to reclaim lives.

The Grown-Up's Guide to Teenage Humans: How to Decode Their Behavior, Develop Unshakable Trust, and Raise a Respectable Adult


Josh Shipp - 2017
    But Josh Shipp didn’t need Harvard to know that. Once an at-risk foster kid, he was headed straight for trouble until he met the man who changed his life: Rodney, the foster parent who refused to quit on Shipp and got him to believe in himself. Now, in The Grown-Up’s Guide to Teenage Humans, Shipp shows all of us how to be that caring adult in a teenager’s life. Stressing the need for compassion, trust, and encouragement, he breaks down the phases of a teenage human from sixth to twelfth grade, examining the changes, goals, and mentality of teenagers at each stage. Shipp offers revelatory stories that take us inside the teen brain, and shares wisdom from top professionals and the most expert grown-ups. He also includes practice scripts that address tough issues, including: FORGIVENESS: What do I do when a teen has been really hurt by someone and it’s not their fault? COMMUNICATION: How do I get a teen to talk to me? They just grunt. TRUST: My teen blew it. My trust is gone. Where do we go from here? BULLYING: Help! A teen (or their friend) is being harassed. DIFFICULT AND AWKWARD CONVERSATIONS: Drugs. Death. Sex. Oh my. Written in Shipp’s playfully authoritative, no-nonsense voice, The Grown-Up’s Guide to Teenage Humans tells his story and unpacks practical strategies that can make a difference. Ultimately, it's not about shortcuts or magic words—as Shipp reminds us, it’s about investing in kids and giving them the love, time, and support they need to thrive. And that means every kid is one caring adult away from being a success story.