“You’re about as useful as a windshield wiper on a goat’s butt.” Keep this book handy, someday you’ll be glad you have it. “Let's play horse. I'll be the front end and you just be yourself.” Pick any of the many jaw-dropping insults then laugh at the look on your adversary’s face when you whip one out and use it on them. You’ll leave no doubt in their mind that you are a master of sarcastic insults! ADDED BONUS: In addition to the fresh and hilarious insults in this book, you’ll also find great sarcastic observations about life hidden inside this book’s pages, like… “I think the reason so many people have smart phones is because opposites attract!” You’re no idiot, so you need this book to start your new life as the master of sarcastic insults and put-downs! “Hey! Who left the Idiot Box open? Now they're everywhere!”

    Our beginners guide contains all the essential information you need in order to succeed. It covers the basic techniques, well illustrated with over a hundred images, and explains everything you need to know in an understandable way. Bonsai Empire is the world's most visited Bonsai website and has provided beginners with quality information for over a decade. We have developed this guide to help you get a taste of this fascinating and living art, and hope you'll enjoy it as much as we do! This book includes: - Over 100 stunning images - Over 80 pages - Explanations of the basic techniques - Care guides on the 10 most popular tree species - Background on the history, definition and styles Walter Pall: "Now here is the ultimate book to lead beginners. I am happy to have been able to contribute to this" Mauro Stemberger "Very clear" and "With great quality drawings and pics"

    The Golden Retriever's personality is as golden as his outer coat. He was bred to please, and please he does. He started out as a hunting partner who delivered birds to hand and has evolved into modern times delivering whatever suits his owner's fancy. Because Golden Retrievers were originally bred to work in tandem with humans, they are also highly trainable. Golden Retrievers For Dummies is intended for busy 21st century dog owners who don't have time to sit down and read through 300 pages at a crack. This is a reference you can jump in and out of as dog questions rear their furry heads. This handy guide is also for you ifYou own a Golden Retriever or thinking about getting one. You've just brought home a Golden pup. You want to find the best way to raise and train your Golden. You want to help your Golde n to not just survive but to thrive. Find out what it takes to own this active, intelligent, and friendly dog. Explore the Golden's personality traits and living requirements. Discover which diseases are hereditary. This reference guide covers all the aspects of dog ownership, including:Looking at breeders, rescue groups, and animal shelters Adopting and caring for older dogs Selecting a puppy with help from an established testing process Dog-proofing your house and yard Crate training, housetraining, and obedience training Canine communication and growing pains Feeding, exercising, and playing with your Golden Dealing with illness, problem behavior, and treatment Grooming for health and beauty If you're serious about this Golden business and not just caving in to the kids or some other wild impulse, follow the advice of responsible dog owners and breeders. Look deep into your dog-loving soul and carefully consider the big picture. Love alone is not enough.

    Norman Baker said that about his autobiography. Why? He was a jackass. In the pages of this book meet 20 losers, killers, confidence tricksters, and incompetents - the Jackasses of History. For adult readers.

    The Bathroom Readers' Hysterical Society agrees, and shows it with this endlessly diverting tribute to tabby. From famous cats to the famous with their cats to cats' famous history, from cats who like to paint to cats who travel the world to find their way home, Uncle John's Hysterical Society scours the globe to find the winning-est, wackiest, most wondrous cat tales for this collection.

    (Except secretly you really do you masochistic, beastly person you.) Illustrated, painfully funny and drop-your-jaw ridiculous, this is trivia from the cesspit of time that you won't be able to stop reading once you start.*To aid childbirth.**They exploded it with 100 times too much dynamite and rained blubber down on unsuspecting people and buildings.***Decency prevents us from answering this one here. You'll have to buy the book to find out.

    Features the local customs in Uganda, mores and bureaucracy governing those from love to superstition.

    Fields Cookies... What backward messages on records are really trying to tell you... Frank Sinatra's real age... Why you can't counterfeit a lottery ticket... Barbra Streisand's blue movie... The other Boy Scout rituals... Ingmar Bergman's soap commercials... The formula for Play-Doh... and more.

    There's no need to look through dozens of photos of birds that don't live in Texas. This book features 170 species of Texas birds, organized by color for ease of use. Do you see a yellow bird and don't know what it is? Go to the yellow section to find out. Fact-filled information, a compare feature, range maps and detailed photographs help to ensure that you positively identify the birds that you see.

    

     Think back to the job interview you nailed (or blew). The date that went perfectly (or broke down completely.) Or the random encounter with that person who turned out to be your best friend (or the countless others that didn’t). Mere seconds of conversation have the power to alter the course of your life. It’s miraculous then that we are never taught HOW to conduct conversations. How to navigate them so that we get more of the jobs, dates, and best friends we want. It’s as if the world believes amazing conversational skills can’t be learned. Captivate shatters that belief. Inside you'll learn: How to keep conversations going without running out of things to say and facing the dreaded awkward silence How to create interesting "getting to know you" conversations without slipping into boring interview mode and turning off who you're talking to How to start conversations with strangers and approach people you don't know Real life examples of great (and terrible) conversations The two modes of conversation that allow you to connect with anyone, even when you don't have anything in common How to finish a conversation so people walk away planning on reaching out to you Read Captivate and you’ll learn how to have conversations that stand out in people’s minds and make you someone they never want to forget.

    

    THIS is Africa is a compilation of stories that defines the maxim "Truth is sometimes stranger, and more wondrous than fiction." From a place known for its continent-wide diversity, notorious for its dramatic turbulence, and beloved for its animals and untamed wildness, Mat Dry, brings his incredible true tales of living and working in Africa as a Safari Guide.

    She introduces you to an African gray parrot named Alex, a bonobo named Kanzi, and a border collie named Betsy. Each of these animals tells us something interesting about the way they perceive and manipulate their world. The article also looks at what scientists are learning about the intelligence of dolphins and crows, beyond mere communication.   In “Almost Human,” Mary Roach takes us to the savannahs of Senegal to meet a group of 34 chimpanzees, whose behavior and social structures have given scientists some important clues about the nature of their communication and intelligence.   In “The Genius of Swarms,” Peter Miller looks at the collective behavior of ants, bees, and other insects for what they can tell us about social organization and how sometimes intelligence lies outside of the individual brain. This article served as the basis for his book, The Smart Swarm: How Understanding Flocks, Schools, and Colonies Can Make Us Better at Communicating, Decision Making, and Getting Things Done.