Pride and Prejudice and Zombies
Seth Grahame-Smith - 2009
As our story opens, a mysterious plague has fallen upon the quiet English village of Meryton—and the dead are returning to life! Feisty heroine Elizabeth Bennet is determined to wipe out the zombie menace, but she’s soon distracted by the arrival of the haughty and arrogant Mr. Darcy. What ensues is a delightful comedy of manners with plenty of civilized sparring between the two young lovers—and even more violent sparring on the blood-soaked battlefield. Can Elizabeth vanquish the spawn of Satan? And overcome the social prejudices of the class-conscious landed gentry? Complete with romance, heartbreak, swordfights, cannibalism, and thousands of rotting corpses,
Shepherd's Wolf
M. Andrew Reid - 2013
Many play for power and fame; others play to escape the pain and loneliness of real life. One boy, paralyzed at birth, knows no other world. For Ben Shepherd, Verdia is home. The Shepherd is Verdia’s most famous and mysterious blacksmith, constructing armor and weapons for elite and wealthy players while hiding from public view. Players ponder the Shepherd’s true identity, and Ben creates his masterpieces in isolation. Ben discovers friendship in the form of an enormous white wolf - a creature unique in all of Verdia. As news of the boy and his wolf spreads, Ben becomes the target of greed, envy, and fear; Ben’s tranquil life is shattered. A band of strangers, united by compassion, will battle a perilous landscape and unrelenting enemies to deliver the Shepherd and his wolf to a new home. To succeed, they must enlist the help of an enemy - a player who is as powerful as he is hated. They will discover that a small group of friends can face impossible odds, and that a hero can hide beneath a villain’s mask.
The Onion Presents: Love, Sex, And Other Natural Disasters: Relationship Reporting From America's Finest News Source
The Onion - 2012
From “18-Year-Old Miraculously Finds Soulmate in Hometown” to “Couple Forgets 70th Wedding Anniversary,” these reports capture the heartbreak and hilarity of the human experience.
The Southern Belle Breakfast Club
Phyllis f. McManus - 2011
They called their little group "The Southern Belle Breakfast Club." They were able to face what life dished out to them as long as they stayed united as one. Sickness, death and even cheating husbands had been a challenge that they were able to overcome. Now, all this was about to change. They did not realize that one of them held a secret that would change their lives forever. Moments that are funny, moments that are sad, and moments that are awkward all come together to make for a heart warming story of these six women and their close bond of friendship.
Her Perfect Valentine Birthday Surprise
Ana E. Ross - 2011
When Sheldon Tanner, the CEO of the company calls her to his office, she has no idea he is the ‘unnamed’ man with whom she had a one-night stand, six years ago. Will Sheldon remember Elizabeth? And if he does, will sparks fly again and ignite their path to a happily ever after?
The Hunger Pains: A Parody
The Harvard Lampoon - 2012
When Kantkiss Neverclean replaces her sister as a contestant on the Hunger Games—the second-highest-rated reality TV show in Peaceland, behind Extreme Home Makeover—she has no idea what to expect. Having lived her entire life in the telemarketing district’s worst neighborhood, the Crack, Kantkiss feels unprepared to fight to the death while simultaneously winking and looking adorable for the cameras. But when her survival rests on choosing between the dreamy hunk from home, Carol Handsomestein, or the doughy klutz, Pita Malarkey, Kantkiss discovers that the toughest conflicts may not be found on the battlefield but in her own heart . . . which is unfortunately on a battlefield.
The Ascent Of Rum Doodle
W.E. Bowman - 1956
As an outrageously funny spoof about the ascent of a 40,000-and-a-half-foot peak, many thought it inspired by the 1953 conquest of Everest. But Bowman had drawn on the flavour and tone of earlier adventures, of Bill Tilman and his 1937 account of the Nandi Devi expedition. The book's central and unforgettable character, Binder, is one of the finest creations in comic literature.
Darkness Reigns
Jill Williamson - 2015
Volcanic eruptions, sinkholes, earthquakes--everything points to his unhappiness. At least this is what the people of Armania in the Five Realms believe. Amidst the unsettling state of the world around them, the princes of Armania live their lives focused more on who will claim the throne after their sickly father, King Echad, dies. That is until Prince Wilek's concubine turns up dead--beside her, a bloodied message that seems to have come from the mother realms.
Sheltered by Love
M.E. Tudor - 2020
The result being two hundred hours of community service at the local Humane Society Shelter. The shelter is run by Lillie Stein, who moved back to her hometown with her daughter, Chrissy, leaving behind the chaotic and uptight life that entailed being part of a United States’ senator’s family.Chrissy Stein spent most of her life being bullied because of her family. She blossomed when her mother moved her away from Washington D.C. and homeschooled her. Now, a vet tech at the shelter, Chrissy loves her life helping animals.Jericho, as Suzanne prefers to be called, finds working at the shelter is not as easy as she thought it would be, but quickly realizes cleaning the kennels and grounds is just one of many things that make life better for the animals at the shelter.Chrissy is devoted to helping animals and is not excited about having to babysit Jericho. But, as the two young women work together, they find that they have a lot in common, despite their very different backgrounds, including their love of animals.Tornadoes, hurricanes, and animal rescues bring Chrissy and Jericho closer together as their relationship builds slowly from friendship to something more. But, will Jericho’s ex ruin everything for these two young women in her effort to hurt everyone she feels has let her down?
Hope for the Holidays
Tiffany Snow - 2021
Her husband, a powerful senator, has hurt them one too many times. But it’s hard to hide from someone with keys to all the powers in government. She stops in a little town in Wyoming—too tired, too scared, and too broke to go further.Sheriff Luke Wilson has worked his family’s ranch in Wyoming nearly all his life, save for a few years playing big-city cop in St. Louis. The draw of his family’s home pulled him back and now he runs his ranch and takes care of what little crime Hope, Wyoming has to offer.It’s Christmas, the time for magic and the unexpected miracle. Fate throws a twist into Hope and Luke’s lives, leading them to a new future...if they can escape the clutches of her abusive husband.
Nathaniel's Gift
Tara Sue Me - 2020
Abby may not admit to needing some alone time with her husband and Dominant, but Nathaniel knows better. He sees the desires and needs she too often brushes aside in order to care for their family, and the sacrifices she makes to mentor the members of their BDSM club.Though she denies it, Nathaniel’s certain taking her away for a week is what they both need. He doesn’t even mind when she continues to argue about it with him. After all, he knows exactly how to handle a naughty submissive...
The Academy Journals First Trilogy Box Set: Books 1-3 of the Academy Journals
Garrett Robinson - 2016
At the age of six, Ebon Drayden discovered he was an alchemist—a wizard who can transform matter with a simple touch. But his father forbade him to use his magic, and kept him from attending the Academy where he could learn to use it. Just before his seventeenth birthday, Ebon’s aunt enrolls him in the Academy against his father's wishes. Now at last he has the chance to use the magic he has so desperately yearned to control. But his family's dark name plagues him. His very presence terrifies the other students. Teachers regard him with suspicion. And before long, he is drawn into a scheme that spans all the nine kingdoms of Underrealm.
THE ALCHEMIST'S TOUCH (Book 1)
Distrusted by his fellow students and spurned by his instructor, Ebon is drawn into one of his family's shadowy schemes. It begins innocently enough—a package delivered to a tavern in the dead of night—but soon even his own kin suspect him of playing both sides against the middle. His only allies are two other outcasts within the citadel. With their help, he hopes to uncover the truth of the conspiracy—but his family's cruel bodyguard may not have Ebon's best interests at heart.
THE MINDMAGE’S WRATH (Book 2)
The High King’s Seat reels from a devastating attack. Those within the Academy attempt to resume their studies, all the while haunted by the empty chairs of those who died in the fighting. But the Academy is not yet safe. A murder shocks students and instructors alike to the core. And while the faculty hunt for the culprit, Ebon senses another fatal conspiracy brewing in the very bowels of the citadel. Someone has been stealing artifacts of immeasurable power, and only Ebon and his friends have any hope of stopping them.
THE FIREMAGE’S VENGEANCE (Book 3)
The Academy killer has escaped, and now holds the Dean’s son captive. Ebon and his friends want to save the boy—but their danger is even more personal, for the killer desires revenge against them. As the Dean grows increasingly suspicious of Ebon himself in the kidnapping, and the recent murders, he must play a deadly game of cat and mouse. For if anyone discovers the secret that Theren is forced to hide, it will mean a slow death under the knives of Mystics for Ebon and all his friends…
Grab your box set now and save 40% off buying the individual books!
Silver Hollow Cozy Mysteries Box Set, #1-3
Leighann Dobbs - 2019
Welcome to the small town of Silver Hollow with its bewitching magic and twisty mysteries. Follow the Quinn cousins, Issy, Gray, Ember and Raine and their quirky familiars as they become embroiled in one paranormal mystery after another. If you like enchanting witches, snarky familiars and hard-to-solve mysteries in a quaint small town setting, then this box-set is a must read. This set includes the first 3 books in the series: Book 1: A Spell of Trouble Book 2: Spell Disaster Book 3: Nothing to Croak About
Bedtime Stories for Children You Hate
Antoinette Bergin - 2011
Includes "Your Upstairs Neighbor Kills People" and "Blood in the Sink". You know you want this book. It can be our secret.**NOT INTENDED FOR CHILDREN**
Arch Allies
Audrey Sharpe - 2019
Sure, restoring the ship won’t be easy, especially when the Feds figure out she’s running an illegal salvage operation, but she’s never shied away from hard work. Or challenges. Good thing, too. Because she’s on a collision course with her competition. If you like sailing the black with rogues and rascals, then you’ll love Arch Allies. A must read for fans of Firefly and Star Wars. Pick up your copy today!