Drop him into a ghastly Kenya prep school in the middle of Rider Haggard country. A school where cricketing news comes by carrier pigeon, leopards are assaulted with a red-hot poker, and runaway boys are hunted down with spearmen and a pack of foxhounds... For Martin Riddle, the experience is unforgettable. For the riding mistress, Lady Bullivant, it is all part of the day's work. And for the headmaster, a disreputable ex-Guards officer, it is simply a means of staving off bankruptcy for a few more weeks. As for the Masai, tennis may be on the curriculum at Haggard Hall, but midnight meetings with naked warriors definitely are not! 'The funniest book I have read since David Lodge's Small World' - Sunday Times 'Wickedly funny' - Daily Mail 'Less savage than Evelyn Waugh, Best is every bit as sharp... an immensely enjoyable book' - Evening Standard 'Very good entertainment' - Sir Alec Guinness (Sunday Times book of the year) Nicholas Best's books have been translated into many languages. He was the Financial Times's fiction critic for ten years and was long-listed in 2010 for the Sunday Times-EFG Bank 30,000 award, the biggest short story prize in the world. For more details, see www.nicholasbest.co.uk

    As her full-time carer, Tottie listened to daily recitations of her favourite saying: 'Mother, mother, it's a bugger, sell the pig and buy me out.” Catch up now with Tottie in the AM years – After Mother – as she starts her new life in the rural Livradois-Forez region of the Auvergne, living in Tottie's Grottage. Meet the local inhabitants, from exotic birds to colourful characters like the Bin Pickers, Library Lady and the Bowing Farmer. All are described with Tottie's familiar gently ironic humour. Discover the procedure behind the Frogification of Tottie, and if her bid for French nationality is successful. 'Mother Was It Worth It?' is the concluding part of the Sell the Pig series, which began with 'Sell the Pig' and 'Is That Billinge Lump?'

    Our story begins with falling in love with France, specifically the enchanting Dordogne. We weren’t the first and we won’t be the last. The region was an inspiration to prehistoric man, as the earliest known works of art are to be found in the nearby caves of Lascaux. From the 1000 chateaux perched on towering cliffs overhanging the meandering Dordogne River to the countless plus beaux villages (most beautiful villages) dotting the region, it is truly a magical place.The first book is a roller-coaster ride of the ups and downs of making the dream a reality, beginning with, Oh my God, are we really doing this?! To looking for the home, getting a loan, wading through the red tape of actually moving, and studying French! Finally, the most important part of making “our” dream come true, adopting a baby girl to make the journey complete.

    Because if you do, you may find out what happens when a former cop with a gun and nothing to lose decides to push back

    

    But that was not so about his wit. At times, he behaved as if he had no sense or common knowledge at all. Finally, after a long long wait, he gets married. He gets an invitation from his in-laws place especially for the celebration of Diwali. His father warned him before leaving that he had to behave properly at his in-laws house as he is no more just anybody. On the contrary, he is now their son-in-law. So he must show attitude while being at their place.What happens then……………?

    100% Complete Strategy to master The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the WildAT-A-GLANCE WALKTHROUGHS: Annotated maps and screenshots show you the way through every quest and all Shrines of Trials.TOTALLY COMPREHENSIVE: All side quests, all  Shrines of Trials and all information about collectable items – each mapped out and ready for you to discover and complete! Also includes optional challenges, mini-games, unlockables, Easter eggs, and more.PUZZLE MASTER: Every single puzzle and riddle unraveled with clear, visual solutions.EXPERT COMBAT STRATEGY: Practical, reproducible tactics to crush your enemies, even the toughest bosses.COMPREHENSIVE REFERENCE: Exhaustive appraisals of all items and monsters – including key parameters that are hidden in the game.FREE MAP POSTER: covering the entire game world.QUALITY CONTROL: carefully designed to avoid unnecessary story spoilers.

    Slump and one of the strangest places on Earth!

     Bedlam, is the first of four books in the hysterically funny series, “Diary of a Stressed Out Mother”. Dora Loveday (harassed mother of four kids, two unruly dogs, and a psychotic cat), records the daily chaos and madness of her family life in this laugh-out-loud, comic romp of a diary!

    It may be gross, but kids love this stuff, and that's the point! I originally wrote this book for my son, a first grader, who was struggling with sight words and reading speed. The sight word books, decodable word books, early reader books, and flash cards they offered him at school were boring, which made it a challenge to get him excited about reading. So I decided to write a series of children's books using sight words but with stories about the things I heard him and his friends laughing about. It worked! My son was able to read my Billy Bad sight word stories with speed and confidence. And because he was laughing I knew his reading comprehension was improving. This book is written using mostly Dolch sight words and a few other words that are easily decodable. Unlike most sight word books and decodable word books, Billy Bad's sight word books have stories that will capture the attention of early readers and make them laugh. When kids enjoy the stories they read they fall in love with reading. I hope your child enjoys these silly (and gross) sight word books as much as my son does.

    From Big Trak to Buckaroo!, Mastermind to Merlin, Sorry! to Strawberry Shortcake, each peerless plaything from the '60s through to the '90s is examined and catalogued (in the Argos, rather than the scientific, sense).Culled from award-winning retro website TV Cream, this book lists a wealth of fondly remembered toys, games, and novelties, and unearths quite a few of the oft-forgotten classics that, even to this day, remain treasured in the hearts of our inner children.LET THE BLIZZARD OF MR MEN WRAPPING PAPER COMMENCE…

    It's a chunky book of 400 questions that range from the heinous to the nauseating to the downright disturbing, each a field-tested conversation starter—because no matter how strange or far-fetched, Would You Rather...? knows that choice provokes thinking, and thinking is fun. Some questions, like a Rorschach test, reveal values: Would you rather . . . Age only from the neck up -OR- age only from the neck down? Be stupid and rich -OR- smart and poor? Some delight in their own grossness: Eat three earthworms -OR- wear a necklace made of them on your wedding day? Be trapped in an elevator with wet dogs -OR- three fat men with bad breath? Some churn up prejudices: Lose your mate to the same sex as yourself -OR- the opposite sex? Some create that squirming sensation: Get a bad case of poison ivy way up inside your nose -OR- inside your inner ear? Or ethical dilemmas: Be president of a firm that poaches endangered species -OR- work for a corrupt politician? And some are just deliciously absurd: Catch a porcupine thrown from a second-story window -OR- a skunk thrown from the same window? Each question is followed up with related, often off-the-wall information, from odd trivia to dumb jokes to the occasional practical advice (go for the skunk—the porcupine's got 30,000 quills, while tomato juice will take away the skunk smell).

    Not real conflict but war as it has filtered down to generations of boys and men through toys, comics, games, and movies. Harry Pearson belongs to the great battalion of men who grew up playing with toy soldiers—refighting World War II—and then stopped growing up. Inspired by the photos of the gallant pilot uncles that decorated the wall above his father's model-making table, by toys such as Action Man (according to Pearson—not a doll) and board games such as Escape from Colditz, dressed in Clarks' commando shoes and with the Airfix Army in support, he battled in the fields and on the beaches, in his head and on the living room floor, and across his bedroom ceiling. And 30 years later he still is. This hilariously self-deprecating memoir is a celebration of those glory days, a boy's own story of the urge to play, to conquer, and to adopt very bad German accents, shouting "Donner und Blitzen!" at every opportunity. This is a tale of obsession, glue, and plastic kits. It is the story of one boy's imaginary war and where it led him.

    But the Clan forces they face also have new BattleMechs, as well as vehicles constructed with the Clans' vastly superior technology, and some other surprises. Technical Readout: 3060 contains illustrations and complete game statistics for the latest Inner Sphere and Clan BattleMechs, tanks, hovercraft, VTOLS, and more.

    Helen shares her own roller coaster journey from the initial shock of a surprise separation, the messy months hanging out in her PJs through to the highs of rediscovering online dating, tiny pants, rock-solid female friendships and the glorious joy of just being by herself.With the help of relationship experts and an army of women "who know", Get Divorced, Be Happy will show you that going it alone isn't the end, it is just the beginning, and you will come out the other side, stronger, happier and goddamn sassier than ever before.