The closest you'll get to having Parks and Recreation's Ron Swanson read you a bedtime story, this sharp and silly series features inappropriate children's stories for adults only – performed by masters of the comedic arts.

    If you enjoyed the collection Imagines, you’ll love Once Upon Now!Truth Be Told by Danielle Banas Of Sirens and Beasts by Mikaela BenderWhy Yes, Bluebeard, I'd Love to by J. M. ButlerMy Love God Went to Hawaii and All I Got Was This Lousy Papaya by Debra GoelzHooded by Shannon KlareBetween Earth and Sky by R. S. KovachSleeping Beauty Syndrome by Ali NovakThe Friend Zone Promposal by Tammy OjaHome-School Hair by Christine OwenAwake by Jesse Sprague

    

    Harsh winds scour the rocky coastline. The villagers' lives are inseparable from nature and its enchantments.Verlyn Webbe, born with a wing for an arm, unfurls his feathers in defiance of past shame; Plum is snatched by a water bull and dragged to his lair; little Crab Skerry takes his first run through the gorse-maze; Madden sleepwalks through violent storms, haunted by horses and her father's wishes.As the tales of this island community interweave over the course of a generation, their earthy desires, resentments, idle gossip and painful losses create a staggeringly original world. Crackling with echoes of ancient folklore, but entirely, wonderfully, her own, Zoe Gilbert's Folk is a dark, beautiful and intoxicating debut.

    Cinderella swaps her glass slippers for Crocs. The Tortoise and the Hare Facebook stalk each other. Goldilocks goes gluten free. And Peter Pan finally has to grow up and get a job, or at least start paying rent.Here are more than one hundred fairy tales, illustrated and re-imagined for today. Instead of fairy godmothers, there’s Siri. And rather than big bad wolves, there are creepy dudes on OkCupid. In our brave new world of social networking, YouTube, and texting, fairy tales can once again lead us to "happily ever after" — and have us laughing all the way.

    A boy with one wing seeks the secret to flight. A girl with a mirror for a face, adored by all, longs to simply eat. A pregnant girl reflects on the effects of metamorphoses. The stories of boysgirls are modern myths: tales that exist within our present time but also outside it, in a place as eternal as Shangri-La or Middle Earth. An unforgettable book of Ovidian imagination, boysgirls testifies that Katie Farris is one of the most talented prose stylists of a new generation. "boysgirls is one for the classic fairy-tale shelves, joining Borges/Lispector, Calvino/Carter, Andersen/d'Aulnoy with its spectral powers. Katie Farris's spare and lyrical language levitates here--she is a haunting and new revelation"--Kate Bernheimer.

    She's carrying a huge box of food . . . and he is very, very hungry.

    Most blame their misfortune on industrialization or the fey, but some curse Snow White, the princess who was born poisoned.As the only person who can survive entering the poisoned woods without a gas mask, Snow White has dedicated her life to studying the poison and finding a cure. This obsession draws her deeper into the woods and its secrets, where nothing is as it seems. When Snow White saves a man who should never have been saved, she unleashes an evil more horrifying and destructive than the poison.28,000 words, or approx 120 pages***Volumes 1-3 of Snow White were originally published under the name POISONED. If you bought POISONED, then you already own this book.***

     Fairy tales are among the earliest fantasies we are exposed to when young and impressionable. They stay with us throughout our lives, whether in their original versions or filtered thorugh cartoon retellings. What more fun could a fantasy writer have than to take up the challenge of drawing up on this rich material and transforming it into something new? The eighteen stories in Terribly Twisted Tales do exactly that. From the adventure of the witch in the gingerbread house and her close encounter with an oven... To Golda Lockes, who has a special arrangement with those well-known bears... To a murderous attack with a glass slipper... To Jack, a successful theorectical geneticist, who discovers just how perilous research can be... To a wolf detective who sets out to solve "Grandma's" murder...   This volume highlights inventive stories that give a new perspective on classic tales! Includes stories from:   Dennis L. McKiernan — Annie Jones — Chris Pierson Mickey Zucker Reichert — Mary Louise Eklund — Robert E. Vardeman Kathleen Watness — Jody Lynn Nye — Jim C. Hines Steven D. Sullivan — Brendan DuBois — Paul Genesse Ramsey "Tome Wyrm" Lundock — Skip & Penny Williams — Elizabeth A. Vaughan Janet Deaver-Pack — Kelly Swails — Michael A. Stackpole

    It can also be an exchange, a betrayal, an assault, a promise, a hope...or it could be a goodbye. The intimacy of a kiss cannot be denied. Whether shared, stolen or simply dreamed of, its recipient will be affected. Thirty-one stories by authors from around the world will tease your imagination as you anticipate ‘The Kiss’ in each weird or wonderful tale. This cross-genre anthology contains stories by Kate Aaron, Saxon Andrew, Jacques Antoine, Alison Blake, E. B. Boggs, Shirley Bourget, Ben Cassidy, Jason Deas, Sharon Delarose, Meghan Ciana Doidge, Suzy Stewart Dubot, Corrie Fischer, Brandon Hale, Traci Tyne Hilton, Colleen Hoover, Mona Ingram, J. L. Jarvis, Elizabeth Jasper, Anna J. McIntyre, Jess Mountifield, C. A. Newsome, S. Patrick O'Connell, Suzie O'Connell, Jeanette Raleigh, J. R. C. Salter, Molly Snow, Holli Marie Spaulding, Cleve Sylcox, Robert Thomas, Chris Ward and George Wier. 130,000 words

    Drawn from The History Press’ popular Folk Tales series, herein lies a treasure trove of tales from a wealth of talented storytellers. From the Spaeman’s peculiar advice and a laird who is transformed into a frog, to a fugitive hiding in a dark cave and the stoor worm battling with Assipattle, this book celebrates the distinct character of Scotland's different customs, beliefs, and dialects, and is a treat for all who enjoy a well-told story.

    Fires that Kia can start…just by thinking about them.When her latest “episode” gets her kicked out of school, Kia is shipped off to her grandmother, who works for the wealthy Blackwoods. It's an estate shrouded in secrets, surrounded by rules, and presided over by a family that is far from normal…including the gorgeous and insolent Ethan Blackwood.Ethan knows far more about the dangers of the forest surrounding the estate than Kia can ever imagine. For this forest has teeth, and Ethan is charged with protecting the outside world from its vicious mysteries.But inside, even the most vibrant shade of red doesn't stand a chance against the dark secrets of the Blackwood family…

    The lump soon morphs into a shape familiar to everyone but her, triggering her curiosity and her father's greatest fears. He frantically tries to intervene, but having a large phantom phallus in a curious maiden's bed is never a good combination.

    She visits her stepmother monthly promising to kill her in ever more horrible ways, at the same time attempting to stay away from the mirror that started it all.At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.

    Every year during the festival each boy leaves a flower at the door of the girl he believes is the "fairest of them all." Naturally, Snow White gets dozens of flowers, while her younger sister Rose Red is ignored. This year, though, things are different. For the first time, Rose Red has a mysterious admirer, and this year she isn't the only one jealous of her sister's beauty. But even though it’s a time of celebration, when girls begin disappearing, the festival turns deadly. With mysterious strangers arriving every day, an ominous marriage proposal, and magic and danger everywhere, Snow White and Rose Red will need to work together to survive the festival and solve the mystery.