Inside, you'll find hundreds of jokes that are guaranteed to stir up a room full of smiles, including knock-knocks, witty puns, and one-liners. Complete with hilarious quotes from celebrities like Jon Stewart, Lewis Black, and Jerry Seinfeld, everyone will revel in each gut-busting moment.So whether you're looking to add a few jokes to your repertoire, impress your buds, or improve your banter, this sidesplitting book arms you with the perfect joke for any occasion!

    Help, Thanks, Wow ...in 30 minutes is the concise guide to quickly understanding the three simple prayers outlined in Anne Lamott's best-selling book, Help, Thanks, Wow: The Three Essential Prayers. Understand the thought-provoking ideas behind Help, Thanks, Wow:* Learn what it means to pray, and the life-opening power of prayer, independent of your faith or lack thereof.* Inspirational stories convey Lamott's personal insight and exploration of faith.* Discover how the three essential prayers help us endure difficult times and continue to move ahead. In Help, Thanks, Wow, best-selling author Anne Lamott demystifies prayer, declaring that there are no rules--a higher power can be called anything, and people can believe in any religion they'd like (or none at all) and still pray.Prayer can take countless forms, but Lamott believes that it all boils down to three essential prayers: Help, Thanks, and Wow. Help is an admission of powerlessness and a plea for assistance; Thanks is a cry of gratitude; and Wow is the experience of awe.A thought-provoking spirituality guide for people of all faiths and creeds, Help, Thanks, Wow examines the importance of the three prayers vital to enduring hardship and experiencing a transformative sense of gratitude and wonder in the world.Help, Thanks, Wow ...in 30 minutesDesigned for those whose desire to enrich their faith exceeds the time they have available, Help, Thanks, Wow ...in 30 minutes enable readers to rapidly understand the essential ideas behind critically acclaimed books. With a condensed format and chapter-by-chapter synopsis that highlights key insights, this summary helps readers easily devote time to growing their faith.

    With topics such as pointless professional development where the author learned how to make bird noises, insanely incompetent teachers who make the good ones look bad, the shit parades that are parent conferences, lack of discipline even for kids who attack people with weapons, outrageous parent requests such as checking the size and color of a teenager's poop, this follow-up to the wildly popular memoir Teacher Misery does not disappoint! Think the stories in Teacher Misery were crazy? Just wait till you read More Teacher Misery!"Morris opens up about the comical misery that has become the teaching profession-giving a voice to teachers everywhere." Parent Herald"One of the funniest teacher books you'll ever read!" Bored Teachers"The stories that Morris tells about the school system are riveting. The antics and violence and outright stupidity that she and other teachers have had to endure are outright insane -- some of it is so crazy it's almost unbelievable." Mission Incomplete"A must read for every single human being on this world, from teachers to parents, students, administrators,  just name it. Let me be honest, nonfiction kind of book is not my cup of tea, but this book is simply amazing, hilarious, keep surprising me non stop!" Jessica's Book Blog"This one is just the most hilarious and heart-breaking ever! Laugh out loud funny!" Teachers Are Terrific"Her stories are so ridiculous, that a non-educator might actually believe they're fabricated. Unfortunately, those of us who are on the inside know it's all too real. Her stories are laugh out loud funny, touching, and at times, maddening." Having a Mom Moment"This book is a great read and a real eye-opener." Carpe Librum"I recommend this book for many reasons. Morris is a great writer who did a great job at presenting her case. She is funny and entertaining. She is above all honest with her interpretation and the things that she sees around her. I liked the variation in text and material. Overall, this books needs to be spread around the country. She isn't the only person that feels this way. There are thousands of other people out there like her and their voices need to be heard." The Next Book on my List"This book was a HILARIOUS read!" The Simply Organized Teacher"I dare you not to laugh out loud!" Robin O'Bryant, New York Times bestselling author of Ketchup is a Vegetable and Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves "Jane is a gifted storyteller, you will chuckle and you will sig. The perfect gift for your kid's teacher or a teacher friend!" Joyce Kaufman, EdD, Host of The Joyce Kaufman Show, Newstalk 850 WFTL "Jane Morris gives us a beautifully written exposé about the worst sides of today's students, parents and school administrators." Bruce Tulgan, bestselling author of Not Everyone Gets a Trophy: How to Manage the Millenials "Jane Morris lifts the curtain on the horror teachers in our country face every day." Laurie Notaro, New York Times bestselling author of The Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club "The stories Morris tells are unbelievable and yet, I'm positive they're true." Jen Mann, New York Times bestselling author of People I Want to Punch in the Throat "Morris dishes on the truth about trying to teach in this culture and it is hilarious, informative, and insightful." Stefanie Wilder Taylor, New York Times bestselling author of Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay "A compelling answer to anyone thoughtless enough to assert that teachers have it easy.

    Having longed for children since before she can remember, she was suddenly faced with an array of unfamiliar, unexpected and sometimes downright embarrassing emotional and physical reactions. And when Poppy (and a year later Daisy) was born she had to learn a whole new set of skills.From trying to conceive and a first positive pregnancy test to Poppy's first birthday, Minus Nine To One takes you through the worries, surprises, excitement, miracles and sheer bloody hard work that Jools - and all new mums in their own different ways - have to cope with along the way. As Jools writes, 'This certainly isn't meant to be read as a guidebook, or a medical reference book - it is simply my story and I hope that you can relate to it in some way (and maybe even relax with it in the bath!).'Down to earth, personal and very, very funny, this is the book no aspiring mother will want to be without.

    Since 2011, more than one million visitors have read and shared Leonard's writing, making Semi-Rad.com stories some of the most viral outdoor content on the internet. Funny Shit in the Woods collects 40 of Semi-Rad's most popular stories in one volume: a single portable archive without the mouse clicks or internet searches-complete with all-new amateurish illustrations hand-drawn by the author, usually while in the front seat of a moving car. If you've ever considered the absurdity of sleeping on the ground in a place where bears live, pooping in a bag on a glacier, or trying to teach someone you love a sport that could scare them to the point of loudly threatening to kill you in front of strangers-or if you find yourself inexplicably drawn to adjust the burning logs in a campfire every two minutes, Funny Shit in the Woods will make you laugh, and might inspire you to get outside a little bit more.

    The commentary will contain background on the poems or more deeply delve into themes or topics discussed in the poems themselves. The spiritual seeker as well as the mature in faith will both benefit from the poems.

    This book is intense. It is not soft. It contains real stories about us that are less than flattering. We talk about problems more than solutions. This is not done in order to be divisive, or to grumble. The aim of this book is to promote honesty for the sake of the Gospel. It contains strong language and descriptions that WILL be offensive to some. This book is written this way because… 2. This is the way we really talk, and this is the kind of stuff that we really talk about. We want you to know who we are and where we come from. We are Matt and Toby from the band Emery, and Pastor Joey Svendsen. Certain paragraphs are written from one perspective, but everything in these pages comes from one collective voice. We have spent the last twelve years in a mix of bars, nightclubs, churches, tour buses, church counseling sessions, greenrooms, youth groups, Christian retreats and festivals, wild parties, prayer circles, and circles of people doing hard drugs. We recommend that you read the articles that we reference. They are the prequel to this book and will provide you with some experience of our approach. 3. We believe that the Church is awesome and is carrying out Jesus’ mission. We fully support the church. In fact, all three of us work and/or serve at large mega-churches. We believe that Jesus changes people, frees them from their sin, and makes them more like Him. We have seen and experienced this first-hand. We believe that Jesus commands us to make disciples and to teach all that He has commanded, which is why… 4. We had to write this book. We feel called and led by God to build BADCHRISTIAN. Jesus’ victory, as well as the change we see in believers’ lives, is REAL, so we don’t need to pretend that we are better than we are. We don’t need to be defensive about our institutions or ourselves. We have to tell the truth and we know that by telling the truth, He is glorified. 5. This is not a book of Theology. This is not Christian Inspiration. This is Matt, Toby, and Joey being themselves. We know that you will disagree with individual points we make or approaches we take. We also admit that we may be wrong, and we humbly ask you to stick it out with us as brothers and sisters. Again, this book is mostly just an assessment of some current problems in Christian culture. Our next book, THE BADCHRISTIAN MANIFESTO, will roll out our plans and potential solutions. For now, we have decided to just give you a personal look at who we are and how we think. Our agenda is the Gospel, and the aim of this book is simply to tell it like we see it: that you are worse than you think you are, and that Jesus is better than you think He is.

    ‘Quest and Crew’ is the first book of a four book series. It begins twenty-four hours before a Category 5 hurricane devastates the south shore of Grenada. It’s a story about the many twists and turns that life can take. The sailboat Quest begins her new life with a full retrofit in North Carolina, followed by Quest’s launch in North Florida two years later. The job of becoming real sailors begins in North Palm Beach. On a clear starry night, we left South Florida on a hope enveloped by a dream. Finding ourselves only at the beginning of a new adventure, we set sail and anchored one island at a time through the Bahamas. The Caribbean is a few books away. Here is a glimpse into the powerful attraction of sailboats and sapphire water. ‘Quest and Crew’ is all about the joy of success as well as what it takes to overcome the occasional disaster. From beginning to end, the book is about transforming a rookie crew and beautiful old boat into a sailing adventure. Come for the hurricane, stay for the story.

    Along the way she also shared some of her favorite recipes from home, showcasing the mouthwatering food that has nourished and delighted her family, leaving readers hungry for more of her home-cooking secrets.   In this, her first cookbook, Jessie goes even further, opening her kitchen cabinets and inviting fans to sit for a spell and enjoy a great meal at the Decker dinner table. Just Feed Me gives fans what they want—simply delicious meals from the heart.  Jessie shares down-home and simple-to-make recipes for drinks, appetizers, and full dinners—many Italian, Southern and Cajun dishes which were handed down to her from her mom. She also offers advice and inspiration for creating the warm, appealing scents and savory feel of her own kitchen, the heart of her household. Aspirational, beautiful, with fun, fast, and flavorful recipes, Just Feed Me is a family-friendly cookbook and keepsake that will leave Jessie fans asking for second helpings.

    A homage to beer by Cheers actor and beer connoisseur George Wendt, better known as Norm Peterson.

    Illustrated with 16 pages of photographs.

    Interviewed and hired by what seemed like a bona fide recruitment agency, Timea left her home on the promise she would earn good money to send home to her family. She had no idea that she'd been lured by a ring of international human traffickers. Upon her arrival in Toronto, she was forced into sex labour in some of the city's seediest nightclubs and kept by her "agents" for three months until she escaped.This is her captivating, heartbreaking but ultimately redemptive story. It will take readers from the early years of Timea's life in Communist Hungary, offering a look inside an austere but complicated world ruled by community, restriction and struggle; then, to the dark, abusive three months working as a sex slave in a country that Timea once believed would offer her freedom and opportunity; and, finally, in riveting detail, through the heart-pounding escape Timea plots.Compelling and sweeping, balancing a tragic and unbelievable experience with a powerful story of grace, Timea Nagy's journey is one that will stay with you long after you read the last page.

    Tantalized by the legend of the Driver—the anonymous, possibly nonexistent organizer of the world's ultimate secret race—Roy set out to become a force to be reckoned with. At speeds approaching 200 mph, he sped from London to Morocco, from Budapest to Rome, from San Francisco to Miami, in his highly modified BMW M5, culminating in a new record for the infamous Los Angeles to New York run: 32:07.Sexy, funny, and shocking, The Driver is a never-before-told insider's look at an unbelievably fast and dangerous society that has long been off-limits to ordinary mortals.

    Author Bob Fenster has captured all their hilarious, behind-the-scenes antics in They Did What!? Consider, for example:o The Beach Boys originally wanted to call their group the Pendletons, so they could get free shirts from the Oregon clothing manufacturer.o At her wedding, movie star Lana Turner had "I love you" spelled out in pimentos in the sides of baked hams.o Before they hit it big in the movies, Angelina Jolie studied to be a funeral director and Sean Connery polished coffins.Filled with hundreds of fascinating escapades and interesting idiosyncrasies, They Did What!? also looks at issues associated with fame, such as "Why do famous people marry other famous people?" and includes tongue-in-cheek lessons we can learn from celebrities, like "How to become famous and still get into heaven."

    In another universe, humanity is overrun by monsters so evil that their very presence dims the light of the stars. In yet another universe, humanity is drawn into an endless battle for dominion over the galaxy. This is not one of those universes. In this universe, humanity is in charge of the Galactic Peace Committee. In theory, the Committee is an unmatched force for good, bringing peace and prosperity to countless worlds and ensuring that conflicts between different races are settled with words and not planet-cracking weaponry or super plagues designed to turn everyone into goo. In theory. Jake Smith is a diplomat. He works for the Committee. This is his story – and it goes about as well as you’d expect. In other words, it doesn’t go very well at all. Can Jake survive petty aliens? Sure. He’s a diplomat. It’s all part of the job. What about angry aliens? Probably. He does have a killer robot for a secretary, and he’s not bad with a shock staff. How about a fleet of aliens out for blood? That… that might be a little bit trickier. The Galactic Peace Committee… keeping peace (sort of) throughout the galaxy.