There Is No Good Card for This: What To Say and Do When Life Is Scary, Awful, and Unfair to People You Love


Kelsey Crowe - 2017
    But many people don’t know what words to use—or are afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing. This thoughtful, instructive guide, from empathy expert Dr. Kelsey Crowe and greeting card maverick Emily McDowell, blends well-researched, actionable advice with the no-nonsense humor and the signature illustration style of McDowell's immensely popular Empathy Cards, to help you feel confident in connecting with anyone experiencing grief, loss, illness, or any other difficult situation.Written in a how-to, relatable, we’ve-all-been-that-deer-in-the-headlights kind of way, There Is No Good Card for This isn’t a spiritual treatise on how to make you a better person or a scientific argument about why compassion matters. It is a helpful illustrated guide to effective compassion that takes you, step by step by step, past the paralysis of thinking about someone in a difficult time to actually doing something (or nothing) with good judgment instead of fear.There Is No Good Card for This features workbook exercises, sample dialogs, and real-life examples from Dr. Crowe’s research, including her popular "Empathy Bootcamps" that give people tools for building relationships when it really counts. Whether it’s a coworker whose mother has died, a neighbor whose husband has been in a car accident, or a friend who is seriously ill, There Is No Good Card for This teaches you how to be the best friend you can be to someone in need.

Done With The Crying: Help and Healing for Mothers of Estranged Adult Children


Sheri McGregor - 2017
     As a loving mother to whom the unthinkable happened, McGregor knows the horrible shock that wrings a parent dry, triggers denial, blame, anger, and shame. With empathy and understanding, as well as tools, the latest research, and insight from more than 9,000 parents of estranged adult children, McGregor helps parents of estranged adults plan ahead, prepare for emotional triggers, and prevail over setbacks and pain. You can be happy again. In a calm yet authoritative voice, and with exercises derived from her work as a life coach and her own recovery, McGregor helps mothers who did their best to come to terms with their estranged adult child's choices, and regain their health and happiness. To fathers of estranged adult children—this book can help you, too. "Ninety-three percent of the parents who answer my survey at RejectedParents.Net are mothers," says Sheri McGregor. "That's why the title is directed at them. But many of the book's examples are from couples and highlight the experiences of fathers and their reactions. The principles presented are relevant to fathers, and the strategies for coping can be used by anyone." In this encouraging and comprehensive book, McGregor fully covers the phenomenon of estranged adult children from families who never expected a son or daughter to cut ties and walk away. Nine in-depth chapters provide dozens of inspiring examples from among the thousands of parents of estranged adult children. Gain understanding and practical help from a mother who knows the pain of this devastating loss with all its uncertainty and heartache. Hope can remain, but you don't have to stay stalled, forever waiting. You can move past the disbelief and distress. Take charge. Reclaim yourself and your life—only maybe even better. Recommendations: The book is a must read for parents of estranged adult children and mental health professionals working with these families. Sheri McGregor’s work is a breath of fresh air offering a new perspective and providing support, encouragement, resources, and compassion to good parents who have found themselves in an unimaginable situation. ---Maritza Parks, LMHC, Inspired Journeys Counseling While Mothers are mentioned on the cover, dads, this is for you too! Done with the Crying is for any (and all) family member who wants to heal and move forward. This wonderful book will help you see how you can hold your chin up high, dry your eyes, and get on with your life. ---Joi Sigers, Self Help Dailly.com Done With the Crying also provides much time for reflection, for taking time to think about ones life and to read the stories of other women who are going through a similar situation. The book is easy to read, and provides much support and insight in a gentle and understanding way. ---Hennie Weiss, M.A., Metapsychology Online Reviews This is my best resource to assist families whose adult children have rejected them. In my role as a family life educator, I work with those affected by a loved one’s mental illness, and the sad phenomenon of estrangement is rampant. I’ve searched for resources and education, but there is precious little available to help rejected parents move forward. It did not take me many pages in to see the value for my work, and I often recommend this compassionately written book to parents and families who are in so much pain. ---Mara J. Briere, MA CFLE, President and Founder, Grow a Strong Family, Inc.

The Power of Attachment: How to Create Deep and Lasting Intimate Relationships


Diane Poole Heller - 2019
    From our earliest years, we develop an attachment style that follows us through life, replaying in our daily emotional landscape, our relationships, and how we feel about ourselves. And in the wake of a traumatic event—such as a car accident, severe illness, loss of a loved one, or experience of abuse—that attachment style can deeply influence what happens next. In The Power of Attachment, Dr. Diane Poole Heller, a pioneer in attachment theory and trauma resolution, shows how overwhelming experiences can disrupt our most important connections— with the parts of ourselves within, with the physical world around us, and with others. The good news is that we can restore and reconnect at all levels, regardless of our past. Here, you’ll learn key insights and practices to help you: • Restore the broken connections caused by trauma • Get embodied and grounded in your body • Integrate the parts of yourself that feel wounded and fragmented • Emerge from grief, fear, and powerlessness to regain strength, joy, and resiliency • Reclaim access to your inner resources and spiritual nature "We are fundamentally designed to heal," teaches Dr. Heller. "Even if our childhood is less than ideal, our secure attachment system is biologically programmed in us, and our job is to simply find out what’s interfering with it—and learn what we can do to make those secure tendencies more dominant." With expertise drawn from Dr. Heller’s research, clinical work, and training programs, this book invites you to begin that journey back to wholeness.

Me, Myself, and Us: The Science of Personality and the Art of Well-Being


Brian Little - 2012
    New scientific research has transformed old ideas about personality based on the theories of Freud, Jung, and the humanistic psychologies of the nineteen sixties, which gave rise to the simplistic categorizations of the Meyer-Briggs Inventory and the "enneagream." But the general public still knows little about the new science and what it reveals about who we are.In Me, Myself, and Us, Brian Little, Ph.D., one of the psychologists who helped re-shape the field, provides the first in-depth exploration of the new personality science and its provocative findings for general readers. The book explores questions that are rooted in the origins of human consciousness but are as commonplace as yesterday's breakfast conversation. Are our first impressions of other people's personalities usually fallacious? Are creative individuals essentially maladjusted? Are our personality traits, as William James put it, "set like plaster" by the age of thirty? Is a belief that we are in control of our lives an unmitigated good? Do our singular personalities comprise one unified self or a confederacy of selves, and if the latter, which of our mini-mes do we offer up in marriage or mergers? Are some individuals genetically hard-wired for happiness? Which is the more viable path toward human flourishing, the pursuit of happiness or the happiness of pursuit?Little provides a resource for answering such questions, and a framework through which readers can explore the personal implications of the new science of personality. Questionnaires and interactive assessments throughout the book facilitate self-exploration, and clarify some of the stranger aspects of our own conduct and that of others. Brian Little helps us see ourselves, and other selves, as somewhat less perplexing and definitely more intriguing.This is not a self-help book, but students at Harvard who took the lecture course on which it is based claim that it changed their lives.

Victims No Longer


Mike Lew - 1988
    Now, in this Second Edition, this invaluable resource continues to offer compassionate and practical advice, supported by personal anecdotes and statements of male survivors. Victims No Longer helps survivors to:Identify and validate their childhood experiencesExplore strategies of survival and healingWork through issues such as trust, intimacy, and sexual confusionEstablish a support network for continued personal recoveryMake choices that aren't determined by abusePsychotherapist Mike Lew has worked with thousands of men and women in their healing from the effects of childhood sexual abuse, rape, physical violence, emotional abuse, and neglect. The development of strategies for recovery from incest and other abuse, particularly for men, has been a major focus of his work as a counselor and group leader.Thoroughly updated and revised, and including an expanded Resources section, Victims No Longer educates survivors and professionals about the recovery process -- speaking to the pain, needs, fears, and hopes of the adult male survivor.

How We Love: Discover Your Love Style, Enhance Your Marriage


Milan Yerkovich - 2006
    They identify four types of injured imprints that combine in marriage to trap couples in a repetitive dance of pain. The groundbreaking principles and practical, solution-focused tools in this book will equip you to… ·identify the imprints disrupting your marriage, ·understand how your love style impacts your mate, ·break free of negative patterns that hinder your relationship, ·enhance your sexual intimacy, and ·create the deeper, richer marriage of your dreams. Discover the truths that have transformed countless relationships– including the authors’ marriage–so you can stop stepping on each other’s toes and instead be swept along by the music of a richer, more passionate relationship.Includes a study guide for individual or group discussion.

Emotional Unavailability


Bryn C. Collins - 1997
    This book offers usable solutions to this human dilemma. Michael Share, Psy.D., L.P.Emotional Unavailability is an innotive look at ho a person's emotional style impacts his or her relationship patterns. The book goes beyond definitions of the various styles to provide techniques and tools for change. James W. Keenan, M.S., L.P., Director Power of Relationships, PAI kept falling into stories that sounded uncomfortably like some that litter my own personal landscape. Trudi Hahn Minneapolis Star TribuneBryn Collins examines the reasons we get into painful, frustrating relationships, and how we can make positive changes without blaming ourselves. Gerrie E. Summers Today's Black WomanIn this groundbreaking book, psychologist Bryn Collins opens up the discussion about life with an emotionally unavailable person. Using case studies, quizzes, and jargon-free, easy-to-understand concepts, she profiles the mos common types of emotionally unavailable partners, then offers the skills you need to change these painful associations. Based on her extensive clinical experience, she offers ways to recognize toxic types before you get too deeply involved, and she gives the emotionally unavailable partner techniques that teach how to connect with anothe person.

Introvert Power: Why Your Inner Life Is Your Hidden Strength


Laurie A. Helgoe - 2008
    Introverts gain energy and power through reflection and solitude. Our culture, however, is geared toward the extrovert. The pressure to enjoy parties, chatter, and interactions can lead people to think that an inward orientation is a problem instead of an opportunity. Helgoe shows that the exact opposite is true: Introverts can capitalize on this inner source of power. INTROVERT POWER is a groundbreaking call for an introvert renaissance, a blueprint for how introverts can take full advantage of this hidden strength in daily life. Supplemented by the voices of several introverts, Helgoe presents a startling look at introvert numbers, influence, and economic might. Revolutionary and invaluable, INTROVERT POWER includes ideas for how introverts can learn to: Claim private spaceCarve out time to thinkBring a slower tempo into daily lifeCreate breaks in conversation and relationshipsDeal effectively with parties, interruptions, and crowds QUIET IS MIGHT. SOLITUDE IS STRENGTH. INTROVERSION IS POWER.

When Bad Things Happen to Good People


Harold S. Kushner - 1981
    Kushner shares his wisdom as a rabbi, a parent, a reader, and a human being. Often imitated but never superseded, When Bad Things Happen to Good People is a classic that offers clear thinking and consolation in times of sorrow.Since its original publication in 1981, When Bad Things Happen to Good People has brought solace and hope to millions of readers and its author has become a nationally known spiritual leader.

Life's Healing Choices: Freedom from Your Hurts, Hang-ups, and Habits


John Baker - 2007
     Happiness and Healing are yours for the choosing. We've all been hurt by other people, we've hurt ourselves, and we've hurt others. And as a result, every single one of us ends up with some sort of hurt, hang-up, or habit. But the question we all face is, Where do we go from here? Life's Healing Choices offers freedom from our hurts, hang-ups, and habits through eight healing choices that promise true happiness and life transformation. Using the Beatitudes of Jesus as a foundation, Senior Pastor Rick Warren of Saddleback Church and John Baker, who is also a pastor at Saddleback, developed the eight choices shared in this book. In addition to practical, encouraging biblical teaching, each chapter includes two real-life stories of men and women whose lives have been transformed by living out the eight choices in this book. Through making each of these choices, you too will find God's pathway to wholeness, growth, spiritual maturity, happiness, and healing. You'll find real answers, real hope, and a real future -- one healing choice at a time.

The Art of Gathering: How We Meet and Why It Matters


Priya Parker - 2018
    If we can understand what makes these gatherings effective and memorable, then we can reframe and redirect them to benefit everyone, host and guest alike. Parker defines a gathering as three or more people who come together for a specific purpose. When we understand why we gather, she says -- to acknowledge, to learn, to challenge, to change -- we learn how to organize gatherings that are relevant and memorable: from an effective business meeting to a thought-provoking conference; from a joyful wedding to a unifying family dinner. Drawing on her experience as a strategic facilitator who's worked with such organizations as the World Economic Forum, the Museum of Modern Art, and the retail company Fresh, Parker explains how ordinary people can create remarkable occasions, large and small. In dozens of fascinating examples, she breaks down the alchemy of these experiences to show what goes into the good ones and demonstrates how we can learn to incorporate those elements into all of our gatherings. The result is a book that's both journey and guide, full of big ideas with real-world applications that will change the way you look at a business meeting, a parent-teacher conference, and a backyard barbecue.

Why Me?


Sarah Burleton - 2010
    Instinctively, I reached out my arms to stop my fall and ended up grabbing the live fence. My hands clamped around the thin wires, and my body collapsed to the ground as the electricity coursed through it. I opened my eyes and saw my mother standing over me with the strangest smile on her face. “Oh, my God, I’m going to die!” I thought in panic.Imagine never being able to close your eyes and remember the feel of your mother’s arms wrapped around you. Now imagine closing your eyes and remembering your mother’s tears splashing down on your face as she is on top of you, crying as she is trying to choke you to death. My mother left me these memories and many more during my traumatic childhood. After many years of struggling with trying to understand “Why Me?” I took back control of my life and started saying, “It was me, now what am I going to do?” The answer is my book, “Why Me?”. It is my childhood journey through the terrors of physical and mental abuse from first grade until the day I moved out. It is my way of letting the world know what was really going on behind closed doors.

We Believe You: Survivors of Campus Sexual Assault Speak Out


Annie E. Clark - 2016
    student activists are exposing a pervasive cover-up of sexual violence on college campuses. Every day more survivors come forward. But other survivors choose not to. We Believe You elevates the stories the headlines about this issue have been missing--more than 30 experiences of trauma, healing and everyday activism, representing a diversity of races, economic and family backgrounds, gender identities, immigration statuses, interests, capacities and loves.More than 1 in 5 women and 5 percent of men are sexually assaulted at college, a shocking status quo that might have stayed largely hidden and unaddressed but for the two authors of We Believe You. In 2013, Annie E. Clark and Andrea L. Pino, then 23 and 20, building on the work of earlier activists, outed themselves as assault survivors and filed a federal complaint against the University of North Carolina (Chapel Hill) for mishandling such crimes; within a month, the U.S. government began to investigate UNC. Within a year, dozens of colleges were under federal investigation.But Clark and Pino rightly see themselves as two among many. Students from every kind of college and university--large and small, public and private, highly selective and less so?are sounding alarms and staking claims to justice by filing complaints, by pressing charges, and by simply living beyond the effects of assault and the betrayals of their schools. A sampling of their voices speak out in this book.

Between Two Worlds: The Inner Lives of Children of Divorce


Elizabeth Marquardt - 2005
    In Between Two Worlds, she weaves the findings of that study together with powerful, unsentimental stories of the childhoods of young people from divorced families. The hard truth, she says, is that while divorce is sometimes necessary, even amicable divorces sow lasting inner conflict in the lives of children. When a family breaks in two, children who stay in touch with both parents must travel between two worlds, trying alone to reconcile their parents’ often strikingly different beliefs, values, and ways of living. Authoritative, beautifully written, and alive with the voices of men and women whose lives were changed by divorce, Marquardt’s book is essential reading for anyone who grew up “between two worlds.”“Makes a persuasive case against the culture of casual divorce.” —Washington Post “A poignant narrative of her own experience . . . Marquardt says she and other young adults who grew up in the divorce explosion of the 1970s and 1980s are still dealing with wounds that they could never talk about with their parents.”—Chicago Tribune

THE NARCISSIST'S SECRETS: (Know the things they don't want you to know!)


Leyla Loric - 2016
    Never, ever want to be drawn into a narcissistic relationship AGAIN! learn the secrets that narcissists play on to lure you in and BREAK THE CYCLE forever. 2. People who find themselves trapped in a narcissistically abusive relationship - if you simply knew the TRUTH of what was really going on in your relationship the narcissist knows very well you would be out of the door like a shot! they are praying you NEVER find out the secrets kept in this book that hold good hearted people in emotionally abusive relationships 3. People who want to WALK AWAY for ever and never look back! Isn't it an irritating burden to even after having gone through the drama and upheaval of a break up with a narcissist (not to mention the expense, emotional, financial and time-wise) to have to carry them around in your head and your heart every day? The narcissist would hate for you to be shown the mechanics of why and HOW the narcissist makes you feel this way so that you can undo it and walk away FOREVER. Looking for Revenge? Find out what makes you desire narcissistically abusive relationships, heal it, grow in self-awareness and strength and MOVE ON to a better life, leaving them in the dust. Nothing is more painful to a narcissist than to LOSE CONTROL over a victim and be discarded in the past by a victim who was not only "not crushed" by the break up but actually improved as a person as a result! This will have the narcissist frothing at the mouth with rage.