These parlances might not fit the modern hoity toity rhetoric you're used to seeing in print or hearing on TV, and that's exactly why they're more refreshing than an ice cube in July. In Butter My Butt and Call Me a Biscuit, Author Allan Zullo offers up more than 200 vernacular verses presented in themes, such as:* Admitting You're Wrong--The easiest way to eat crow is while it's still warm, 'cause the colder it gets the harder it is to swallow.* Congress--Gettin' a politician to do somethin' good for our country is like tryin' to poke a cat out from under the porch with a rope.* Ego--Some people are so full of themselves, you'd like to buy 'em for what they're worth and sell 'em for what they think they're worth.* Teenage Boys--You kinda wish they used their heads for somethin' besides hat racks.* Revenge--Two wrongs don't make a right, but they sure do make it even.* Surprises--Sometimes you get so surprised by life there ain't nothin' else to say but, 'Butter my butt and call me a biscuit.'"

    With the unpredictable wit and engaging warmth that has won her a loyal following, and the undeniable star quality that has made her television series an instant hit, Ellen DeGeneres brings her unique comic perspective to the page in a book of simple yet brilliant observations, outrageous dreams, and hilarious life stories.

    BBC hit Sherlock has brought Conan Doyle's legendary detective to a whole new audience and Sherlock: The Casebook is The Great Game for the next generation. This is no ordinary guide. Each case is brought to life on the page and re-examined through Dr Watson's blog, Inspector Lestrade's police reports, newspaper articles about the crimes, Sherlock's detective notes and any other surviving clues from the cases. Interspersed amongst the evidence are exclusive interviews with the stars of the show, Benedict Cumberbatch, Martin Freeman and Rupert Graves, writers and co-creators Mark Gatiss and Steven Moffat and the production team on everything from writing the scripts and bringing the characters to life on screen to set design and production. This is a multi-dimensional companion to Sherlock and a glorious tribute to the world-famous detective.

    This is both one man's remarkable story and an essential guide for anyone who has a celluloid story to tell and the dreams and determination to see it through.  Part production diary, part how-to manual, Rodriguez unveils how he was able to make his influential first film on only a $7,000 budget.  Also included is the appendix, 'The Ten Minute Film Course,” a tell-all on how to save thousands of dollars on film school and teach yourself the ropes of film production, directing, and screenwriting.

    Librarian's Note: this is an alternate cover edition - ASIN: B009KWO32U“Misadventures of a 1970s Childhood” delivers 18 stories about: • 6th grade puppy love• A large wooden stereo console• The first David Cassidy shag haircut• A dog that ran away• The old photo box in our parents' hall closet• Reassessing my grandmother’s difficult life• Bike jumps that nearly killed us• Revenge on the sledding slopes• A child left behind at the drive-in theater• A toilet clogged with an apple core • And other misadventures common to the 70sI hope enjoy reliving your 1970s childhood memories as much as I enjoyed writing about my own.Tom PurcellTom@TomPurcell.comwww.TomPurcell.com

    Tori Spelling might have grown up with everything a girl could wish for, but these days she's just another suburban working mom...whose toddler regularly recognizes her in the pages of Us Weekly. Welcome to Mommywood, where the stars are two feet tall and your neighbors know who you are before you move in. Like most parents, Tori wants her children to have the one thing she didn't have as a kid -- a normal family. On their hit Oxygen reality show, Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood, the starlet and her husband Dean McDermott regularly wrestle dirty diapers, host the neighborhood block party, and tackle temper tantrums on the red carpet. But when the cameras aren't rolling, Tori's still having awkward run-ins with a former 90210 costar at a laser tag birthday party, scooping rogue poo out of the kiddie pool on a resort vacation, and racing to win back her pre-baby body before the media starts calling her fat. For all her suburban fantasies, Tori Spelling is no June Cleaver. With the same down-to-earth wit that made her entertaining memoir sTORI telling a #1 New York Times bestseller, Tori tells the hilarious and humbling stories of life as a mom in the limelight. From learning to be the kind of parent her own mother never was to revealing what it's like to raise a family while everyone is watching, Mommywood is an irresistible snapshot of celebrity parenthood that you won't get from the paparazzi.

    On Antiques Roadshow, experts tell people whether they have a "match" and are in possession of a valuable antique or simply have another run-of-the-mill object. Leigh and Leslie Keno, the twin-brother experts who appear on Antiques Roadshow, have now written a book chronicling their history of discovering rare antiques -- Hidden Treasures: Searching for Masterpieces of American Furniture.These brothers have literally spent a lifetime learning about antiques. By the time the boys were 12, they were already dealers and were more than a bit familiar with the world of flea markets, tag sales, and antique shops. Having been raised in a home where they learned that the intrinsic value of an antique lies in its rarity and beauty, the brothers took that knowledge and built a life around what quickly became an obsession.In Hidden Treasures the Kenos' passion is not explained in a dry, academic lecture; instead, they detail some of the most exciting antiques hunts they've had. Although they are both obviously experts, there are still pieces that experts can question or pass over because years of refinishing and reupholstering have disguised the original design. Sometimes even experts can feel like they're on the other side of the table at Antiques Roadshow. In Hidden Treasures the Kenos face some trials, but their skill and determination always leads them to success.The brothers, who alternate writing chapters, don't simply want to tell readers about the fun they have -- they want the readers to understand antiques. Hidden Treasures is filled with photographs of the rare and beautiful pieces discussed in the text. Many of the pieces are shown in a series of photographs to explain exactly why those pieces are works of such incredible craftsmanship.Reading Hidden Treasures will not turn someone into the experts that Leigh and Leslie are. But it does allow for a much greater understanding of the antiques world that they love. They teach readers to appreciate the beauty that can transform an everyday object into a work of art, and in doing so, they teach readers to keep their eyes open to the beauty that people miss every day.

    walk for pleasure in the countryside.‘Dr Buckles and Rosie the dog love rambling in the countryside.’2. talk or write at length in a confused or inconsequential way.‘Adam rambles on about lots of consequential, compelling and personal matters in his tender, insightful, hilarious and totally unconfused memoir, Ramble Book.’Ramble Book is about parenthood, boarding-school trauma, arguing with your partner, bad parties, confrontations on trains, friendship, wanting to fit in, growing up in the '80s, dead dads, teenage sexual anxiety, failed artistic endeavours, being a David Bowie fan and how everything you read, watch and listen to as a child forms a part of the adult you become.

    This crafty revision of English vocabulary posits that Platypus should signify “to give your cat pigtails;” that Flemish should mean “rather like snot;” and that Celtic is in fact a prison for fleas. With nearly 600 new definitions, this side-splitting resource pushes the boundaries of the English language to riotous new limits.

    In answer to countless requests from I Love Lucy fans around the world, Bart Andrews has revised, updated, and expanded his classic book on TV's most beloved series.B & W photographs throughout.

    If you like Sarah’s television show The Sarah Silverman Program, or memoirs such as Chelsea Handler’s Are You There Vodka? It’s Me Chelsea and Artie Lange’s Too Fat to Fish, you’ll love The Bedwetter.

    She surveyed the darkest corners of Internet chat rooms, and made a pilgrimage to London to savor the most caustic and literate obits of all. Now she leads us on a compelling journey into the cult and culture behind the obituary page and the unusual lives we don't quite appreciate until they're gone.

    A key feature of the program is his daily award for "The Worst Person in the World." From Ann Coulter and Barbara Bush to Bill O'Reilly and more, he brings the best of his "worsts" together in a wildly entertaining collection that reveals just how twisted people can be-and how much fun it is to call them out on it.

    Taking what he knew from vaudeville--ingenuity, athleticism, audacity and wit--Keaton applied his hand to the new medium of film, proving himself a prodigious acrobat and brilliant writer, gagman, director and actor in more than 100 films. Between 1920 and 1929, he rivaled Fatty Arbuckle, Harold Lloyd, and even Charlie Chaplin as the master of silent comedy by writing, directing, and starring in more than 30 films. The book celebrates Keaton in his prime--as an antic genius, equal parts auteur, innovator, prankster and daredevil--while also revealing the pressures in his personal and professional life that led to a collapse into drunkenness and despair before his triumphant second act as a television pioneer and Hollywood player in everything from beach movies to Beckett. McPherson describes the life of Keaton--in front of the camera and behind the scenes--with the kind of exuberance and narrative energy displayed by the shrewd, madcap films themselves.

    Rowling and the brilliant curators of the British Library. It promises to take readers on a fascinating journey through the subjects studied at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry – from Alchemy and Potions classes through to Herbology and Care of Magical Creatures.Each chapter showcases a treasure trove of artefacts from the British Library and other collections around the world, beside exclusive manuscripts, sketches and illustrations from the Harry Potter archive. There's also a specially commissioned essay for each subject area by an expert, writer or cultural commentator, inspired by the contents of the exhibition – absorbing, insightful and unexpected contributions from Steve Backshall, the Reverend Richard Coles, Owen Davies, Julia Eccleshare, Roger Highfield, Steve Kloves, Lucy Mangan, Anna Pavord and Tim Peake, who offer a personal perspective on their magical theme.Readers will be able to pore over ancient spell books, amazing illuminated scrolls that reveal the secret of the Elixir of Life, vials of dragon's blood, mandrake roots, painted centaurs and a genuine witch's broomstick, in a book that shows J.K. Rowling's magical inventions alongside their cultural and historical forebears.This is the ultimate gift for Harry Potter fans, curious minds, big imaginations, bibliophiles and readers around the world who missed out on the chance to see the exhibition in person.