Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies


Michael J. Bader - 2002
    Michael Bader offers a groundbreaking new theory of sexual desire. Drawing on his twenty-five years as a psychotherapist and psychoanalyst, Dr. Bader demonstrates that rather than being programmed by biology or society, sexual fantasies and preferences are really psychological antidotes to unconscious dangers. Armed with this novel theory, men and women will no longer need to feel ashamed about what arouses them or confused about what arouses others.

Sex Is Fun!: Creative Ideas for Exciting Sex


Kidder Kaper - 2010
    In his first book, Kaper reinvents the sex manual, using whimsical cartoon characters and stylishly illustrated pages to deliver his singular sexpertise. Sex Is Fun! is for anyone looking for creative ways to spice up their sex lives and for couples seeking long-term solutions for keeping their relationship exciting. Both entertaining and informative, it offers a fresh take on sex toys, talking dirty, sizzling foreplay, erotic massage, inventive positions, role-playing, and other tips for a mind-blowing experience. With clever illustrations and humorous dialogue, Kaper's titillating tour surpasses other books in the category, taking the intimidation out of sex play and offering workbook-style activities and games, such as the candid Sexual Interest Inventory and the What Scares You? questionnaire. Read solo or with a partner, these thirty-six chapters will help couples enhance communication, explore new territory, and reach higher levels of pleasure and fulfillment.Read Kidder Kaper's posts on the Penguin Blog.

If the Buddha Dated: A Handbook for Finding Love on a Spiritual Path


Charlotte Kasl - 1999
    Kasl brings a compassionate understanding to the anxiety and uneasiness of new love, and helps readers discover their potential for vibrant human connection based on awareness, kindness, and honesty. She approaches the dating process as a means for awakening, reminding us that when we live by spiritual rules, we bring curiosity and a light heart to the romantic journey. Filled with quotations from Zen, Sufi, and other wisdom traditions, and informed by the experiences of people from all walks of life, here is a relationship book that will appeal to readers looking for more than a Venus-meets-Mars solution to the complex affairs of the heart.

Broken Open: How Difficult Times Can Help Us Grow


Elizabeth Lesser - 2004
    In a beautifully crafted blend of moving stories, humorous insights, practical guidance, and personal memoir, she offers tools to help us make the choice we all face in times of challenge: Will we be broken down and defeated, or broken open and transformed? Lesser shares tales of ordinary people who have risen from the ashes of illness, divorce, loss of a job or a loved one - stronger, wiser, and more in touch with their purpose and passion. And she draws on the world's great spiritual and psychological traditions to support us as we too learn to break open and blossom into who we were meant to be.

I Don't Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression


Terrence Real - 1997
    And these escape attempts only hurt the people men love and pass their condition on to their children.This ground breaking book is the "pathway out of darkness" that these men and their families seek. Real reveals how men can unearth their pain, heal themselves, restore relationships, and break the legacy of abuse. He mixes penetrating analysis with compelling tales of his patients and even his ownexperiences with depression as the son of a violent, depressed father and the father of two young sons.

A Billion Wicked Thoughts: What the World's Largest Experiment Reveals about Human Desire


Ogi Ogas - 2011
     For his groundbreaking sexual research, Alfred Kinsey and his team interviewed 18,000 people, relying on them to honestly report their most intimate experiences. Using the Internet, the neuroscientists Ogas and Gaddam quietly observed the raw sexual behaviors of half a billion people. By combining their observations with neuroscience and animal research, these two young neuroscientists finally answer the long-disputed question: what do people really like? Ogas and Gaddam's findings are transforming the way scientists and therapists think about sexual desire. In their startling book, Ogas and Gaddam analyze a "billion wicked thoughts" on the Internet: a billion Web searches, a million individual search histories, a million erotic stories, a half-million erotic videos, a million Web sites, millions of online personal ads, and many other enormous sources of sexual data in order to understand the true differences between male and female desires, including: ?Men and women have hardwired sexual cues analogous to our hardwired tastes-there are sexual versions of sweet, sour, salty, savory, and bitter. But men and women are wired with different sets of cues. ?The male sexual brain resembles a reckless hunter, while the female sexual brain resembles a cautious detective agency. ?Men form their sexual interests during adolescence and rarely change. Women's sexual interests are plastic and change frequently. ?The male sexual brain is an "or gate": A single stimulus can arouse it. The female sexual brain is an "and gate": It requires many simultaneous stimuli to arouse it. ?When it comes to sexual arousal, men prefer overweight women to underweight women, and a significant number of men seek out erotic images of women in their 40s, 50s, and 60s. ?Women enjoy writing and sharing erotic stories with other women. The fastest growing genre of erotic stories for women are stories about two heterosexual men having sex. ?Though the male sexual brain is much more different from the female sexual brain than is commonly believed, the sexual brain of gay men is virtually identical to that of straight men. Featuring cutting-edge, jaw-dropping science, this wildly entertaining and controversial book helps readers understand their partner's sexual desires with a depth of knowledge unavailable from any other source. Its fascinating and occasionally disturbing findings will rock our modern understanding of sexuality, just as Kinsey's reports did sixty years ago.

Tomorrow Sex Will Be Good Again: Women and Desire in the Age of Consent


Katherine Angel - 2021
    They are told that in the name of sexual consent and feminist empowerment, they must proclaim their desires clearly and confidently. Sex researchers tell us that women don't know what they want. And men are on hand to persuade women that what they want is, in fact, exactly what men want. In this environment, how can women possibly know what they want—and how can they be expected to?In this elegantly written, searching book Katherine Angel surveys medical and psychoanalytic understandings of female desire, from Freud to Kinsey to present-day science; MeToo-era debates over consent, assault, and feminism; and popular culture, TV, and film to challenge our assumptions about female desire. Why, she asks, do we expect desire to be easily understood? Why is there not space for the unsure, the tentative, the maybe, the let's just see? In contrast to the endless exhortation to know what we want, Angel proposes that sex can be a conversation, requiring insight, interaction, and mutual vulnerability—a shared collaboration into the unknown.In this crucial moment of renewed attention to violence and power, Angel urges that we remake our thinking about sex, pleasure, and autonomy without any illusions of perfect self-knowledge. Only then will we bring about Michel Foucault's sardonic promise, in 1976, that "tomorrow sex will be good again."

Get Inside Her: Dirty Dating Tips & Secrets from a Woman on How to Attract, Seduce and Get Any Female You Want


Marni Kinrys - 2013
    You see, these emails were not the typical online dating messages. They weren't asking me out on dates, or vying for desire or attention. They were sent from great guys, who no matter what they tried, always seemed to find that beautiful women ended up dating jerks and never calling them back.Now, you might be wondering what all these guys are doing emailing me their questions, but as a professional Wing Girl, it's my duty to be the girl who gives it to guys straight of the dating community. I'm always brutally honest and have been told I have a gift for seeing things from both sides of the dating lines, but it took me a few glasses of wine and some seriously deep thinking to try to piece the puzzle together.What was going on?I knew all my gorgeous girlfriends were looking for these types of men. Men who were exciting, fun, good, honest and who had their life together...So as they were they emailing me, detailing their failed attempts, I tried to find the one common factor that was holding these great guys back. I spoke with them at length about their dating history, trying to figure out if they were doing something wrong, and then it struck me.It wasn't them; it was "The Game" they had been told to play.They had the best intentions, but they were going about attracting and dating beautiful women in all the wrong ways. They were dating from the male perspective and in a way that seemed right to other guys; but this wasn't communicated clearly to women!As I started to reply to each email, instead of telling them what I thought they wanted to hear or what I thought male Pick Up Artists might tell them, I started to lay it all out on the line. Later on, when I asked my girlfriends for their opinion, they couldn't believe what I had written.I was revealing all secrets women would never tell men. I was putting it out there in a way that would give guys what my girlfriends called the upper hand, but I defended my actions. These were genuinely great guys! I was tired of hearing how women could never find what they were looking for. Now, when I was gave the men a road map to go out and find them, they freaked out!That's when I knew I had something worth sharing. Something that would turn the dating world on its head; finally, I thought, "It's time to shake things up!"If you have ever wondered why you aren't on the calendars of beautiful women, why they never seem to call back, or always end up with the jerks of the world, then you have to hear what I have to say.You need to accept that it's not your fault and face the facts. Men and women are different. We act, think, and date differently. If you want to find success, you have to see things from a different perspective. You have to gain the world's first (and best) awarded female Pick Up Artists perspective!Now when I go out, meet with clients, call, or email these great guys back, I get something in return. I get to see them finally date the women they have always wanted and deserved. They tell me how easy and simple it has become, and how they cannot believe they didn't think of it first.

Untrue: Why Nearly Everything We Believe About Women, Lust, and Infidelity Is Wrong and How the New Science Can Set Us Free


Wednesday Martin - 2018
    Blending personal stories from Martin's own history with accessible social science, cultural theory, and interviews with sex researchers, psychologists, primatologists, anthropologists, and real women from all walks of life, she reveals startling insights about female sexuality.

Love Sense: The Revolutionary New Science of Romantic Relationships


Sue Johnson - 2013
    Love Sense presents new scientific evidence that tells us that humans are meant to mate for life. Dr. Johnson explains that romantic love is an attachment bond, just like that between mother and child, and shows us how to develop our "love sense" -- our ability to develop long-lasting relationships.Love is not the least bit illogical or random, but actually an ordered and wise recipe for survival. Love Sense covers the three stages of a relationship and how to best weather them; the intelligence of emotions and the logic of love; the physical and psychological benefits of secure love; and much more. Based on groundbreaking research, Love Sense will change the way we think about love.

The Power of the Pussy - How To Get What You Want From Men: Love, Respect, Commitment and More!


Kara King - 2012
    In this book you'll learn valuable lessons that will teach you how to... ~Flip the switch in your female brain, so you can beat men at their own game... ~Have men lining up to date you and desperate for your attention... ~Heal from a broken heart and never be sad over a man again! ~Become the type of woman that commands respect from men... ~Get the proposal, the ring, and the man of your dreams! Get what you want from men and have the time of your life while doing it! This book has empowered women and dramatically changed their lives by changing the way they think about men and dating, and it can change your life too! DISCLAIMER: This book contains strong language, sexual content and subject matter that may be offensive to some readers.

Wired for Love: How Understanding Your Partner's Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship


Stan Tatkin - 2012
    Every person is wired for love differently, with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people's minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and rituals, making it possible to actually neurologically prime the brain for greater love and fewer conflicts.Wired for Love is a complete insider’s guide to understanding your partner’s brain and enjoying a romantic relationship built on love and trust. Synthesizing research findings on how and why love lasts drawn from neuroscience, attachment theory, and emotion regulation, this book presents ten guiding principles that can improve any relationship.Strengthen your relationship by:Creating and maintaining a safe “couple bubble” Using morning and evening rituals to stay connected Learning to fight so that nobody loses Becoming the expert on what makes your partner feel loved By learning to use simple gestures and words, readers can learn to put out emotional fires and help their partners feel more safe and secure. The no-fault view of conflict in this book encourages readers to move past a "warring brain" mentality and toward a more cooperative "loving brain" understanding of the relationship. This book is essential reading for couples and others interested in understanding the complex dynamics at work behind love and trust in intimate relationships.While there’s no doubt that love is an inexact science, if you can discover how you and your partner are wired differently, you can overcome your differences to create a lasting intimate connection.

Sexual Intelligence: What We Really Want from Sex


Marty Klein - 2012
    Sex therapist, sociologist, and Psychology Today contributor Dr. Marty Klein goes beyond the sex manuals to reveal how our mindsets during sex are more important than any tricks or techniques—and that the way to a healthier, more exciting, more fulfilling sex life lies in first developing our sexual intelligence. This book is the antidote to the many gimmick-oriented sex guides and manuals; Dr. Klein shows us how to reorient how we think about sex in order to experience a truly different way of being sexual.“Marty Klein is the Steve Jobs of sex advice. . . . Sexual Intelligence is a work of enormous wisdom and expansiveness, and will inspire readers, regardless of age, to realize their full sexual potential.”—Ian Kerner, best-selling author of She Comes First

The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality


Julie Sondra Decker - 2014
    They aren't sexually attracted to anyone, and they consider it a sexual orientation—like gay, straight, or bisexual.Asexuality is the invisible orientation. Most people believe that "everyone" wants sex, that "everyone" understands what it means to be attracted to other people, and that "everyone" wants to date and mate. But that's where asexual people are left out—they don't find other people sexually attractive, and if and when they say so, they are very rarely treated as though that's okay.When an asexual person comes out, alarming reactions regularly follow; loved ones fear that an asexual person is sick, or psychologically warped, or suffering from abuse. Critics confront asexual people with accusations of following a fad, hiding homosexuality, or making excuses for romantic failures. And all of this contributes to a discouraging master narrative: there is no such thing as "asexual." Being an asexual person is a lie or an illness, and it needs to be fixed.In The Invisible Orientation, Julie Sondra Decker outlines what asexuality is, counters misconceptions, provides resources, and puts asexual people's experiences in context as they move through a very sexualized world. It includes information for asexual people to help understand their orientation and what it means for their relationships, as well as tips and facts for those who want to understand their asexual friends and loved ones.

Sexual Secrets: The Alchemy of Ecstasy


Nik Douglas - 1979
    Sexual Secrets was the first book to explore the Eastern path of love and mysticism, bringing together more than a thousand years of practical techniques for enhancing sexual awareness and achieving transcendental unity.