Those who still believe in them are often wildly misinformed. So what do you think will happen when Johnny McNormalpants finds himself face to face with a bloodthirsty vampire? Probably crap his pants, but then what? An informed citizen would know exactly what to do in this situation. If only there was some way to enlighten the public about this often forgotten subject, preferably in the form of a mock informative guide or something. From Matt Melvin, one of the creators of Explosm.net and the hit online comic Cyanide & Happiness, comes Dracula Is A Racist, the definitive guide to vampires, answering those gravely important questions that keep you up at night. . . Was Dracula really a racist?How do vampires do their hair if they don't have any reflection?Is it gross for immortals to be attracted to high school girls if they're stuck in a 17-year-old body?Was Sesame Street ever truly safe from The Count?Is dressing in all black and acting snobby toward everyone enough to fake being a vampire?Just how much more badass are vampires than zombies?Dracula Is A Racist is the essential vampire handbook that digs up all the dirt and backs it up with hard vampirical evidence. That's totally true. Really. Matt Melvin is a 25-year-old T-shirt aficionado and sideburn enthusiast. Along with three other dudes, he runs Explosm.net, a pretty awesome website full of awesome things. When not adding even more filth to the Internet, he enjoys criticizing and complaining about movies, listening to music and inventing obscure types of niche sexual acts. He currently lives in San Diego. He is very tall."

    A must for anyone who's interested in the business of laughter.' JOE LYCETT'The funniest book I've read in years.' ADAM KAYFrom a childhood spent making smoke bombs, killing wasps and carving soap in 70s Kent, Harry Hill then found himself in charge of hundreds of sick people as a junior doctor. Out of his depth and terrified, he chucked it all in to pursue his dream of becoming a stand-up comedian. Battling his way through the 90s Comedy circuit he quickly rose to become a household name and one of the UK's most celebrated comics, almost making it to the top of the showbiz tree . . .From being chased around a car park by an angry heckler, getting fired from Capital Radio and watching every episode of Freaky Eaters, to a bizarre assassination attempt and cutting up Simon Cowell's trousers, Harry takes an honest and hilarious look at the ups and downs of his life and career through the lens of what didn't go right.He shares his secrets on how to be a great comedian, finding joy in failure and creativity in struggle, whilst never forgetting that life is short . . . What readers are saying about Fight! 'Hilarious... recommended unreservedly' *****'Lots of laughs and memories of days gone by' *****'A great book... I could not put it down' *****'Beautifully written and great fun' *****

    For five years the authors researched every archive, and readers can now lose themselves in the summations of America’s finest litigators. Clarence Darrow saves Leopold and Loeb from the gallows in the Roaring Twenties. Gerry Spence takes on the nuclear power industry for the death of Karen Silkwood in a modern-day David and Goliath struggle. Vincent Bugliosi squares off against the madness of Charles Manson and his murderous “family” in the aftermath of their bloody spree. Clara Foltz, the first woman to practice law in California, argues passionately to an all-male jury, defending her place in the courtroom. Bobby DeLaughter brings the killer of civil-rights leader Medgar Evers to justice after thirty years and two mistrials. Aubrey Daniel brings Lt. William Calley, Jr., to justice for the My Lai massacre. William Kunstler challenges the establishment after the 1968 Chicago riots in his defense of yippie leaders known as the Chicago Seven. Each closing argument is put into context by the authors, who provide historical background, a brief biography of each attorney, and commentary, pointing out the trial tactics used to great effect by the lawyers, all in accessible, reader-friendly language.

    These large, colorful works are the capstone of his engagement with nature, not only in England but also in the American Southwest, through the media of painting and photography. This book, the catalog of the first major Hockney museum exhibition in many years, offers a glorious view of the landscape as seen by the artist, and it includes not only his recent paintings but also his iPhone and iPad drawings. Essays by leading art historians—as well as a more literary piece by novelist Margaret Drabble and Hockney’s own reflections on his recent work—explore Hockney’s art from various perspectives.Praise for David Hockney:"Supplemented with numerous essays by art critics and Hockney himself, this is a mesmerizing volume of an established artist who continues to assert his dynamic relevancy." —Publishers Weekly (starred review) "This glorious volume showcases this unique and exhilarating body of work, which celebrates the pulse of life in trees, fields, flowers, and clouds over the great cycle of the seasons . . . The enlightening commentary is merely prelude to a swoon once the reader turns to the 300 resplendent color reproductions." —Booklist, starred review

    That’s why, with obesity rates soaring and fitness levels declining, he wants to give everyone an all-access pass to his premium plan for lifelong fitness. In Formula 50, the mega-successful entertainer and entrepreneur unleashes the power of metabolic resistance training (MRT), the key ingredient that has helped him achieve the famously buff physique that makes his music videos sizzle.Through MRT, 50 Cent’s fitness plan breaks down the barriers between traditional weight training and cardio workouts, accelerating fat loss while building muscle and improving overall fitness. Designed for a six-week rollout for total mind-body transformation, the Formula 50 regimen builds willpower while it builds physical power. In addition to motivation, nutrition is another key element; readers will discover the unique dietary combinations that fuel 50 Cent’s workouts. Coauthored with Jeff O’Connell, health journalist and editor-in-chief at Bodybuilding.com (the world’s largest fitness website), the book delivers a payoff that goes beyond six-pack abs and flab-free pecs: This is a fitness plan that boosts energy, endurance, flexibility, and mobility. The result is a body you’ve always dreamed of—and the mindset to attain the rest of your dreams.

    While The Damned United was a fictional account of Clough’s short-lived but controversial reign at the club, this book reveals the true story, as told by the players he managed at the time. Vividly recreating the atmosphere of the era, the book features candid contributions from legendary names such as Peter Lorimer, Eddie Gray, and Norman Hunter. They reveal what it was like to make the transition from the relatively smooth management style of former manager Don Revie, who helped the club achieve success in Europe, to a constant crossing of swords with the outspoken Brian Clough, who left the club flailing at the foot of the league upon his premature departure. This explosive account covers all the drama that ensued from the moment Clough was earmarked by the club directors as the favorite to succeed Revie to his exit less than two months later, saddled with the knowledge that he had been the club’s most unsuccessful manager ever. Told from the perspective of those who experienced Clough’s dictatorial managerial methods at Leeds at first hand, We are the Damned United tells it how it really was rather than how it might have been.

    And the adventure has only begun! In her first humor-packed guide to raising twins, Elizabeth Lyons and her "multiples" sorority offer the wisdom of their combined experience in the form of practical shortcuts, real-world strategies, and sage advice. Topics include: - Preparing the Lair: Mandatory Gear for Babies AND Mom - Twinproofing Your Marriage - Breastfeeding Strategies (and Why It's Okay if You Don't) - Unsolicited Advice: Stories from the Trenches - Getting Twins on a Schedule--Preferably the Same One Lyons balances the day-to-day challenges of raising twins--from double feedings to sleep deprivation to getting out while pretending everything's under control--with a sanity-saving dose of camaraderie. By the end, you'll be smiling and shouting, "Thank heaven, I'm not alone!"

    for Girls, Vargas and Rosado now reveal the other face of the coin: Qui?bole with... for Guys. Adolescence is a complicated stage of life in which, overnight and without warning, you are faced with uncertainties of all kinds. Here, guys will find the answer to all the questions that keep you up at night, from the physical to the mental changes.

    Palkhivala, a multi-talented personality, played diverse roles in his life—lawyer, diplomat, orator, author, political and economic thinker, and social reformer. An advocate of civil liberties, he proactively defended the Constitution and the principles enshrined in it.This book contains select quotations—classified subject-wise under various chapters—from his writings and speeches over six decades of his working life. The book introduces the man through his thoughts and ideas with the aim of inspiring readers, particularly the youth.

    Cardozo — an Associate Supreme Court Justice of the United States from 1932-38 — explains a judge's conscious and unconscious decision-making processes.Cardozo handed down opinions that stressed the necessity for the law to adapt to the realities and needs of contemporary life. Famous for his convincing and lucid prose, he offers insights that remain relevant to a modern view of American jurisprudence. In simple, understandable language, he discusses the ways that rulings are guided and shaped by information, precedent and custom, and standards of justice and morals.Four of Cardozo's lectures appear here, bookended by an introduction and conclusion. They explore a variety of approaches to the judicial process: the method of philosophy; the methods of history, tradition, and sociology; the method of sociology and the judge as a legislator; and adherence to precedent and the subconscious element in the judicial process. Ideal for law students as well as anyone interested in legal theory, this volume offers a rare look inside the mind of a great jurist.

    Issues explored include breastfeeding, circumcision, colic, immunization, SIDS, postnatal depression, and sleeping with a baby. Intriguing research into babies' senses and what they can perceive is also presented. The informative and engaging advice throughout will help parents avoid panic and achieve a rewarding relationship with their newborn.

    From translator and assistant to Sir Bobby Robson at Barcelona, to Champions League-winning manager at Porto and on to turning Chelsea into one of Europe`s most successful clubs, followed by Champions League victory at Inter-Milan, and now manager of Real Madrid, Jose Mourinho`s ascent has been rapid. Backed by Abramovich`s billions, Mourinho weeded out those not fully committed to his methods, made several astute signings and improved the performances of many Chelsea stars. The result: in his first season in 2005, Chelsea won both the Premier League title and the Carling Cup, followed by another title the following season. Mourinho then left for Inter-Milan where he delivered a treble in his second season in charge, and is now tasked with bringing Real Madrid`s `Galacticos` the silverware they crave. Further Anatomy of a Winner is an intelligent, analytical and now fully updated account of the life and psychology of one of the greatest football managers.

    Using the simple device of telling the Christmas story backwards, Stephen Cottrell helps us encounter it as if for the first time.

    Buzz had thought that he would only need to sacrifice one weekend a month and two weeks a year for training to earn the money that would help pay for his college tuition. He had no idea that even the newest reservists could find themselves on the battlefield in a matter of weeks. "Spare Parts recounts Williams's harrowing deployment to the Persian Gulf after only four weeks of combat training. Enduring both the condescension of full-time Marines and the danger of his limited preparation, he manages to form a core group that struggles to gain respect from a military machine that views them as mere "spare parts." In gripping, you-are-there detail, "Spare Parts articulates the grueling physical and emotional trials that Williams and his comrades must face on the killing fields of Kuwait--where some of the woefully underprepared men are able to rise to the challenge and others are broken by the horrors of battle. A compelling portrait of the more than 1.2 million reservists who stand ready to leave civilian life to defend our nation at a moment's notice, "Spare Parts adds a moving new perspective to the literature of war.

    In doing so, he identifies the pivotal moments in the club's rise to being one of the foremost teams of the twentieth century.With his trademark tactical acumen, Wilson goes back to the matches themselves and subjects them to forensic examination, re-evaluating and reassessing, and going beyond the white noise of banal player quotes and instant judgements to discover why what happened happened. It is in this way, as far as possible, a football history of a great club.And because this is Manchester United, there is additional resonance. From the completion of Old Trafford in 1910, United have had a significant financial advantage. Yet their past has not been one of sustained success. As such, their history is also, to an extent, a history of English football, with all of its possibilities and frustrations.