Can sit naked in front of book without fear of radiation 9. Reader not distracted by Dave's awful haircut 8. Can be readily enjoyed in Amish households 7. If you fall asleep while reading the book you won't wake up to fat weather guy wishing Happy Birthday to one hundred-year-olds 6. Can use your imagination to picture lists being read aloud by handsome actor George Peppard 5. Origami! Origami! Origami! 4. Can be enjoyed by inmates who have lost their TV privileges 3. Carrying book around proudly announces to rest of world, "I can read large print!" 2. Easier to shoplift than 26-inch Trinitron Stereo Sony 1. Any book is better than Dave's TV show

    And if that’s too much to ask, remember the sage advice from the staff of a Taipei hotel: “If there is anything we can do to assist and help you, please do not contact us.”

    Another super collection of naughty and not-so-naughty jokes, humorous anecdotes, comic interludes, hilarious situations and bitchy remarks, selected by Khushwant Singh from amongst the thousands contributed by his readers and fans - and some manufactured by him.

    It will feature the best sports writing from the website, delivered in a full-color book featuring original artwork and a host of print exclusives—including original fiction, new writing from editor-in-chief Bill Simmons, posters and pull-out sections, old-school baseball cards and mini-booklets, and a cover that looks and feels like you're holding a basketball. Like its namesake website, Grantland Quarterly will regularly include some of the most exciting and form-pushing sports writers currently plying the trade, including Chuck Klosterman, Malcolm Gladwell, Tom Bissell, Harris Wittels, John Brandon, Anna Clark, Chris Jones, Colson Whitehead, and many more.

    In this new book, his first update, Perret offers readers a treasure trove of guidelines and suggestions covering a broad range of comedy writing situations, along with many all-important insights into the selling of one’s work. Perret covers all aspects of comedy writing in his uniquely knowledgeable and anecdotal fashion.

    Twelve classic Horrible Histories are being reissued with a tie-in cover. In Gorgeous Georgians readers can discover thehe full story: Gangs who made a living selling dead bodies. Husbands who sold their wives at auction. Doctors who cured toothache with squashed fish eyes. Join Rattus Rattus and the gang for the funniest, fastest, nastiest and daftest ride through histor you're ever likely to see..

    With step-by-step instructions on how to choose, set up, and modify your own charcoal, gas, or electric smoker, Jeff guides you through your smoking session with the patience that is unique to an experienced pitmaster. Once you've chosen your smoker and got the knack of some basic techniques, Jeff encourages you to cut loose and experiment to develop your own smoky sensations. Best of all, you can use your basic backyard grill to give smoking meats a try, then decide whether to invest in a smoker.

    Waking from a nine-day coma, he had no memory of the thirty-eight prior years of his life, including his ex-wife, family, artistic talents, or military service. To reconstruct his past, Hogancamp built, in his backyard, Marwencol, an imaginary village set in World War II Belgium, where everybody is welcome—Germans, Americans, French, British, and Russians—as long as peace is kept. With 1:6 scale action figures and Barbie dolls, as well as toy armaments and meticulously built props, buildings, and clothes, Marwencol is an alternate reality, created with painstaking (and sometimes painful) realism and obsessive attention to detail.Here, riveting wartime dramas are played out and photographed in saturated hues and unflinching detail. The emotional narrative mirrors the artist's own: through Marwencol, Hogancamp regained his cognitive facilities.Welcome to Marwencol is an astonishing story of the redemptive power of art—of art as therapy and act of obsession.

    A look at the absurdities of modern life.

    In addition to their story, each author elaborates on her feelings about the “chick-lit” label and recommends literary fiction writers that have inspired them.

    His memoir is a funny, thrilling, and ruthlessly honest exhumation of his drinking life and a candid account of his first 90 days without alcoholTom traces his alcoholism back to his British boyhood at Eton College, England's oldest and most exclusive boarding school, where the boys had to wear tail suits to class and there was a school pub. He delves into his aristocratic family's well-documented fondness for the bottle and covers his own drinking apprenticeship as a trainee journalist on London's famously alcohol-sodden newspapers.Whether he is getting arrested for drunk driving at the age of 15, climbing naked into his friends' and colleagues' beds, or simply trying to file an emergency front-page update while reeling from a cocktail of Ecstacy and magic mushrooms, Tom takes the reader on an addictive journey into the insanity of intoxication—all too often followed by a mossy tongue, a dull headache, and one burning question: "What the hell did I do last night?"

    The result is this stunning memoir. Featuring 78 poems, 78 essays and intimate family photographs, Alexie shares raw, angry, funny, profane, tender memories of a childhood few can imagine--growing up dirt-poor on an Indian reservation, one of four children raised by alcoholic parents. Throughout, a portrait emerges of his mother as a beautiful, mercurial, abusive, intelligent, complicated woman. You Don't Have To Say You Love Me is a powerful account of a complicated relationship, an unflinching and unforgettable remembrance.

    Topics include: • How to get royalties from selling articles.• Proper pricing.• How to submit articles to the "Kindle Singles" (special Amazon category). • Best ways to sell articles.• Representing articles accurately in e-Reader bookstores.• Avoiding unnecessary costs. • Image formatting.Tips are also applicable for a variety of mobile devices such as the Barnes and Noble Nook and Apple ipad. You will learn how to publish your article in a word processor, without having to learn HTML coding. Instructional Appendices Include: • How to create table of contents and internal links.• Solving formatting problems.• Converting your article to a Kindle device.• Easy preview options before you publish.• A curated list of the 50 best resources for finding free Kindle books, software, podcasts, help forums and the best blogs on Kindle publishing (10,300 words).About the Author: Kate Harper has taught art and computer classes in the San Francisco Bay Area and enjoys creating visual step-by-step guides for non-technical users. She is a credentialed adult education instructor in the state of California, and is inspired by technologies that encourage people to be more creative.

    With comfort-food recipes gathered from across America as well as 46 other countries, you'll find homemade classics along with dishes that may be difficult to pronounce, but are easy to enjoy. And nearly all 440 of these simple and economical recipes are made from ingredients available in most local groceries, so you can delight your family and friends again and again. As you turn the more than 340 pages of this charming book, you'll discover recipes for real food cooked by real people around the globe—dishes for every occasion and every taste. Enjoy a traditional British Sunday dinner, or delight your family and friends with a delicious Finnish glass cake. You may even want to whip up a batch of Brigham Young's favorite buttermilk donuts. You'll find savory soups to sweet treats, creamy casseroles, entrées with a little bit of kick, and dishes that younger taste buds will like. But perhaps your favorite part of this delightful book will be the stories behind the recipes—snippets that will bring a smile, and maybe even inspire you to start a few new traditions. So pull out the pans, fire up the stove, and create some new favorites with the abundance of appetizing ideas found in your Worldwide Ward Cookbook. 9.5" X 11", 342 pages ISBN 978-1-59811-779-0

    It is intended for those who write humor or have ever wanted to.