Packed full of zingers and hilarious illustrations, if this doesn't put a smile on your face, nothing will. What's not to like:The other day someone left a piece of plasticine in my dressing room. I didn't know what to make of it. I'm against hunting. I'm actually a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox. I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah. He was trying to pull a fast one. Black holes. I don't know what people see in them. So I fancied a game of darts with my mate. He said, 'Nearest the bull goes first.' He went 'Baah' and I went 'Moo'. He said 'You're closest.' Velcro. What a rip-off. Black Beauty. He's a dark horse. I've got a sponge front door. Hey, don't knock it.

    Whether you're carving evil messages into your coworker's banana peel or telling your kids that, yes, raisins are actually dehydrated people, there's a certain, sinister-yet-fun draw to really messing with people. In Perhaps I’ve Said Too Much (the much anticipated follow-up to the heralded, award-winning Things Go Wrong For Me), Rodney Lacroix gives the reader some insight on what it's like to live the prankster life. No one is safe, including Rodney himself as not all of his antics go entirely as planned. Join him as he spins some yarns, gives you some new ideas and lets you relive the catastrophic consequences of jokes gone terribly wrong. Complete with original hand-drawn artwork and graphics, one-two punch Brain Nuggets, and the ever-popular Draw Something Files, Perhaps will not disappoint.* (Assumes you are an immature child who enjoys potty humor and making fart noises with your armpits.)

    That quixotic quest for understanding has drawn much of the world’s population eastward ever since Buddha first assumed the lotus position, and writer Mara Altman needed to know why. So she flew around the world in search of an answer not only to that mystery, but also to the deeper questions that plague all who yearn to define the meaning of life. What Altman found in her wild, comic 18-day reporting trek across India – a journey that took her on a laborious, 37-hour cross-country train trip, onto a mystical flat rock by the ocean in Pondicherry, and eventually into the emergency room of a cut-rate Bangalore hospital – will make you laugh, learn and ponder. By the end of her epic odyssey, it will also take you unexpectedly and thrillingly close to the pulsing heart of human existence. After graduating from Columbia University’s Graduate School of Journalism, Mara Altman worked as a staff writer for The Village Voice. In 2009, HarperCollins published Altman's first book, Thanks For Coming: A Young Woman's Quest for an Orgasm, which was optioned as a comedy series by HBO. She has published seven bestselling Kindle Singles, including the #1 bestseller Bearded Lady, and has also written for New York Magazine and The New York Times. Cover design by Adil Dara

    His humor and short fiction appear in various publications throughout the Southeast.

    This is a collection of original essays that can not be found anywhere else. Each volume is different and you never know what you'll find. They are an assortment of Jen's childhood memories, stories about her family, and rants about everything that make her punchy all told with her usual snarky take. Volume Three of this series includes 3 NEVER BEFORE SEEN essays: HEY DICK, WOULD YOU SEND YOUR MOM THAT PICTURE? LAURA INGALLS WILDER NEVER HAD A SIGNATURE LIPSMACKER FLAVOR MISSED MOM CONNECTION

    She is always the first on the dancefloor and the very last to stop boogying. She has never tried to dress like a Parisian, never followed advice on what not to wear, and certainly has never tried to tone down her natural pinkness; she knows he is perfect just the way she is. And even when life throws Flamingo a curveball, she is always ready to embrace the unknown and jump straight in.A gorgeous little gift book of motivational sayings and hilarious axioms, Be a Flamingo is a perfect pink pick-me-up gift for a friend who needs a confidence boost, or great as an impulse self-purchase when you feel you need to start tooting your own horn a little louder. Because we could all do worse than taking a leaf out of Flamingo's book.

    The then father of four and Sydney Harbour Bridge rigger from Granville did it as a dare, but when the network's switchboard lit up, he was invited back. So popular was he with viewers, Hogan became a regular on Mike Willesee's A Current Affair. The rest, as they say, is history. In collaboration with his business partner and best friend John Cornell (who played his sidekick, Strop), he went on to become Australia's favourite TV comedian. His hugely popular comedy shows and appearances in unforgettable and ground-breaking ads for cigarettes, beer and tourism, came to personify Australia and Australians here and overseas, helping to change the perception of who we are as people and as a nation.Then, in 1986, Crocodile Dundee, the movie he conceived, co-wrote and starred in, became an international smash, grossing more than a billion dollars in today's money and earning its star an Oscar nomination. Despite the fact Hoges claimed to be 'retired', many more movies followed, including Crocodile Dundee II, Lightning Jack, Almost an Angel and Charlie & Boots. But even as his star rose ever higher, he always expected someone to grab him by the arm and say, 'What are you doing here? You're just a bloody rigger!'The Tap Dancing Knife Thrower is a funny and candid account of the astonishing life of 'one lucky bastard', as Hoges describes himself. Full of countless stories never previously shared and told in the comedian's inimitable, funny and self-deprecating style, The Tap Dancing Knife Thrower is Paul Hogan's story told his way - 'without the boring bits'.

    Lots of laughs and tears are part of the job. Combat, test flying and, as the title implies, high risk. A Silver Star recipient, much of my OV-10 combat time was in Laos. Started with the F-100 in Europe and finished my career as test director to make the F-100 a target.

    The home was unkempt and rubbish was littered all over the floor. Dirty nappies were piled up in a corner of the room, which made the room have an awful stench. None of Jacksons bottles were being sterilised before use, and the water that was to make up the formula was tap water….straight from the tap and unboiled."

    These memoirs take him from enjoying the odd cold beer sailing peacefully across the Indian Ocean to being trapped in a war zone. Here he sees life at sea changing from the leisurely days of general cargoes to the hectic computerised containerships. He seems to have done it all – rescuing drug runners from the ice, dredging aggregates in the North Sea and finally skippering a ‘steamer’ on a tranquil lake. This volume is the second of Bob’s memoirs covering his service as master on a wide variety of ships. The first book ‘I think I’ll go to sea’ relates to his experiences climbing up through the ranks. In this book he has to flee the USA to avoid arrest for drug smuggling, assists rescuing a ship’s crew when their ship sinks in pack ice and gets stuck in the middle of the Iraq/Iran war. He also experiences alcohol free ships which take away the pleasure of his ‘cold beer’

    This passion stems from his own story … Before Michael was even one year old, he was diagnosed with an aggressive cancer of the central nervous system – a tumour had taken over half of his tiny body. The chance of Michael surviving was virtually non-existent. He started chemotherapy at 1 year old and by his second birthday, doctors had basically given up all hope. His only hope was taking part in a drug trial program – a program of which Michael was the only participant to survive the treatment. Although he survived, he was left with some permanent scars – only one lung, a damaged heart and a sensitive immune system. Michael Crossland sets an example for all of us. He's a man who has faced (and still faces) extreme challenges in life, but he never gives up. And despite his own obstacles, he always puts others before himself and gives so much to people in need. A true inspiration. A true hero. About the Author: As one of Australia’s most sought after inspirational speakers Michael has defied the odds of a life threatening cancer to build his life of exceptional achievements. He is a regular inspirational speaker for corporations, schools, professional sporting organisations and universities throughout the world. In the last 12 months Michael has presented in front of over 250,000 people around the globe. His journey has been shared on many TV programs including Fox Sports, ABC, ChannelSeven & Nine networks, Full Potential TV, The Get Inspired Project, Inspire Me Today program and countless radio shows throughout America, Fiji and Australia. Along with his award winning program about his life on Australian Stories, Michael has also recently featured in a humanitarian documentary about the countless lives saved through his orphanage and school in Haiti that he is involved with. Diagnosed before his first birthday and spending over ¼ of his life in hospital, doctors told him school and sport were not options. Infection and fatigue were too great a risk, reaching his teenage years would be a miracle. His only wish was to lead a normal life and be able to do all the things that other kids took for granted every day. But he had a dream and the undying determination to achieve the impossible… No matter the size of the obstacles that lay ahead. Now, an accomplished businessman, National Ambassador for Camp Quality, Australian of the Year finalist, Australia Day Ambassador and international hall of fame inductee, Michael inspires people from all walks of life. It is no doubt he has a heart for giving and a skill to engage people from all walks of life. Within the last five years he has gone from being one of the youngest State Development Managers for one of the largest companies in the world, to running five banks then leaving his finance career to follow his dreams in making a global impact and he certainly has done that! Michael’s story “Field of Dreams” was documented on Australian Story, ABC TV television. Through this documentary, his message touched the hearts of a nation, with his story of how he overcame seemingly insurmountable obstacles to achieve success in both his personal and professional life.

    New Zealand needed just one more win. Oracle ultimately beat back the odds in what's been called the greatest comeback in sport. But was it? G. Bruce Knecht set out to investigate how Oracle turned things around and, most particularly, the source of extra horsepower that seemed to come from nowhere during the final races. What he discovered was that the team was using a sailing technique that was prohibited under the rules. The Comeback is a pulse-pounding account of Oracle's desperate stop-at-nothing campaign.G. Bruce Knecht, a former staff reporter and foreign correspondent for The Wall Street Journal, is the author of three books, including The Proving Ground: The Inside Story of the 1998 Sydney to Hobart Race. Larry Ellison was a major character in that book as well and it explains how his experience in the race led to his pursuit of the America's Cup. A sailor himself, Knecht raced across the Atlantic in 2005 on the yacht that broke the 100-year-old transatlantic race record.Cover design by Charles Rue Woods.

    From stress and anxiety to real loss, booze was his magic elixir that made it all disappear. But the constant blackout nights brought with them even more trouble. Despite the perpetual cycle of drunken mistakes and continued escalation in drinking, he found new ways to rationalize his self-destructive behavior. Drinking was a part of who he was. And an existence without it seemed inconceivable. He takes you through a life where nights with missing pieces of time were the norm. And how there was a haze that overshadowed everything, even his happiest memories. He shares how far he fell before finally willing to change. And the long road back in recovery that required him to completely shift his perceptive in order to remain sober. He also explains what he discovered about the many reasons he drank so much for so long. And how he was ultimately able to come out better on the other side. This is a memoir about overcoming the grip alcohol can have on us. About learning to live life again after the bottle and facing the world with sober eyes. And finally discovering one’s true self. This is a story that will resonate with anyone who has struggled with addiction. And will give hope to those looking to change their lives for the better.

    Just a few short months later, he found himself confined to a wheelchair. But rather than succumbing to the darkness that threatened to overwhelm him in the days after his diagnosis, he drew on his powerful faith and unwavering belief in life and found a way to light, hope and acceptance.From growing up in Fairview, to serving in the dioceses in Ballymun and later Mount Merrion and Kilmacud, and his charity work while in UCD, Fr Tony takes us on the journey of his life and shows us how, through this devastating illness, he came to know the true meaning and nature of God's love.Sadly, Tony passed away on the 28 August 2019 but his memoir and his message of hope, strength and unwavering faith live on.'Our lives will never be measured in words spoken or success achieved but rather how we live and how our life has affected those around us.' Fr Tony Coote

    I lived through and beyond horrific child abuse. This book tells of my brutal beginnings, starting when I was only four years old when my mother went in to hospital to have baby number three. My clothing was stripped off by my father, who hung me upside down naked on a hook on the inside of a cupboard door by the ankles. He beat me with his huge hands, then only took me down once I stopped screaming. He then plunged me into a pre prepared bath full of cold water, where I almost drowned. Even although he was holding me under the water, and I was thrashing about and fighting my young life, I could hear my drunken father laughing at me. My abuse and ridicule follows me through my school years, and has a major impact on my mental health. My family grew until I had six siblings all living with me in a two bedroom cottage. I was never acknowledged as a son by my violent father, I was the outcast, the one who brought shame to the family, and I was the devils child. This is the true story of a childhood lost, and the struggles to overcome the mental anguish afflicted on me throughout my young life. This story will take the reader on a painful journey as I move with my siblings around Scotland, from house to house, and school to school, always just evading the authorities who could have helped me. This story leaves nothing to the readers’ imagination. There are some lighter moments throughout the book which will make the reader laugh, but my story will make you wonder how I survived, and what does happen behind closed doors. Even although I am now over 60 years old, I often sometimes mourn my stolen childhood, it is like a limb has been pulled off, I can feel where it was supposed to be but it is just not there, it is a part of me which I will never get back, it was taken away without my consent and is now lost forever. Sometimes it just hits me out of nowhere, an overwhelming sadness and emptiness rushes over me. I get disheartened and I feel hopeless, sad, and hurt, and once again I feel numb to the world.