Seasons in Hell is a riotous, candid, irreverent behind-the-scenes account in the tradition of The Bronx Zoo and Ball Four, following the Texas Rangers from Whitey Herzog’s reign in 1973 through Billy Martin’s tumultuous tenure. Offering wonderful perspectives on dozens of unique (and likely never-to-be-seen-again) baseball personalities, Seasons in Hell recounts some of the most extreme characters ever to play the game and brings to life the no-holds-barred culture of major league baseball in the mid-seventies

    It's the expose to end all exposes--the truth about the suburbs: where they planted trees and crabgrass came up, where they planted the schools and taxes came up, where they died of old age trying to merge onto the freeway and where they finally got sex out of the schools and back into the gutters.

    Classic read from a very funny Dad.

    A few months after that historic victory, he became a father for the first time. His first book, It's Not About the Bike , charted his journey back to life and went on to become an international bestseller, and to win the William Hill Sports Book of the Year 2000.Now, in this much-anticipated follow-up, Armstrong shares more details of his remarkable life story, including four more Tour de France wins, an Olympic medal, and the births of his twin daughters Grace and Isabelle. Never shy of controversy, Lance Armstrong is a genuine global sports superstar and one of cycling's greatest ever champions. Here he offers us his life philosophy - his thoughts on thoughts on training, competing, winning and failure. He also recounts the work done for the Foundation he set up following his dramatic recovery and introduces further inspirational tales of cancer survival.Every Second Counts is another extraordinary and awe-inspiring book from a man who strives every day to meet life's momentous challenges.

    Degenerative brain conditions, early onset arthritis, bad knees, hips, shoulders: such is the glory that awaits the retired veteran of the NFL-as well as the terrible pensions and imminent financial ruin for the majority that lack college degrees. But for the millions of NFL fans, the average NFL player is faceless; his pain and suffering virtually invisible.Nate Jackson was a receiver at tiny Division III Menlo College, on the coast of California. Talented enough to sign as a free agent with the 49ers, he then played for six seasons with the Denver Broncos, bouncing from the practice squad to the active roster and eventually a starting spot-a player barely holding on to a career in the pros, like the majority of his fellow players.As he traces the arc of his career, Jackson brings to light the story of hundreds of everyday, "expendable" players whose lives-unlike those of their superstar colleagues-aren't captured in high-definition. From scouting combines to training camps, off-season parties to game-day routines, this remarkably written memoir-funny, candid, controversial, and artful-is an unforgettable look at life in the NFL, and the real lives of young men risking their bodies, and ultimately their lives, to play pro football.

    Get ready to hear it again - from real-life comedy all-stars! This Audible Original production pairs the paragon of comedy with six of the funniest famous people he’s inspired: Will Ferrell, Jimmy Kimmel, Lisa Kudrow, Conan O’Brien, Judd Apatow, and Sarah Silverman. Bob Newhart matches wits with a handpicked cast of entertainment luminaries as they exchange never-before-heard personal anecdotes and, yes, jokes. Using his trademark deadpan and signature charm, Bob banters with his celebrated guests, drawing out their most interesting stories and telling his own. Listening is such a kick - you’ll understand why Bob has been a wellspring for contemporary comedy talent. Foreword by Marc Maron. Chapters in Hi Bob!: 1. Foreword 2. Prologue 3. "I Was an Accountant" 4. "That Would Be Ridiculous" 5. "I Still Love Radio" 6. "Comedy Is Better Than College" 7. "Week to Week Contract" 8. "Hold for Laughs" 9. "You're Shootin' My Ear, Man!" 10. "I Thought You Were Overdoing It" 11. "Yes, We're Friends" 12. "Rickles" 13. "Vegas" 14. "Dying Every Night" 15. "If You're Terrified, You're Doing It Right" 16. "The Magic Pen" 17. "Stop Me If You've Heard This One" 18. "Can't Change with the Times?" 19. "Some Parting Advice" 20. Epilogue

    fans of Elaine Lui’s site know, her mother, aka The Squawking Chicken, is a huge factor in Elaine’s life. She pulls no punches, especially with her only child. “Where’s my money?” she asks every time she sees Elaine. “You’ll never be Miss Hong Kong,” she informed her daughter when she was a girl. Listen to the Squawking Chicken lays bare the playbook of unusual advice, warnings, and unwavering love that has guided Elaine throughout her life. Using the nine principles that her mother used to raise her, Elaine tells us the story of the Squawking Chicken’s life—in which she walked an unusual path to parent with tough love, humor, and, through it all, a mother’s unyielding devotion to her daughter. This is a love letter to mothers everywhere.

    With a true geek's unflinching honesty, Wil examines life, love, the web, and the absurdities of Hollywood in these compelling autobiographical narratives. Based on pieces first published in Wil's hugely popular blog, www.wilwheaton.net, the stories in Dancing Barefoot is a vivid account of one man's version of that universal story, the search for self. If you've ever fallen in love, wondered what goes on behind the scenes at a Star Trek convention, or thought hard about the meaning of life, you'll find a kindred soul in the pages of Dancing Barefoot. In the process of uncovering his true geeky self, Wil Wheaton speaks to the inner geek in all of us.

    Now, Amy Schumer has written a refreshingly candid and uproariously funny collection of (extremely) personal and observational essays. In The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo, Amy mines her past for stories about her teenage years, her family, relationships, and sex and shares the experiences that have shaped who she is - a woman with the courage to bare her soul to stand up for what she believes in, all while making us laugh.Ranging from the raucous to the romantic, the heartfelt to the harrowing, this highly entertaining and universally appealing collection is the literary equivalent of a night out with your best friends - an unforgettable and fun adventure that you wish could last forever. Whether she's experiencing lust-at-first-sight while in the airport security line, sharing her own views on love and marriage, admitting to being an introvert, or discovering her cross-fit instructor's secret bad habit, Amy Schumer proves to be a bighearted, brave, and thoughtful storyteller that will leave you nodding your head in recognition, laughing out loud, and sobbing uncontrollably - but only because it's over.

    I Don't Care About Your Band posits that lately the worst guys to date are the ones who seem sensitive. It's the jerks in nice guy clothing, not the players in Ed Hardy, who break the hearts of modern girls who grew up in the shadow of feminism, thinking they could have everything, but end up compromising constantly. The cowards, the kidults, the critics, and the contenders: these are the stars of Klausner's memoir about how hard it is to find a man--good or otherwise--when you're a cynical grown-up exiled in the dregs of Guyville. Off the popularity of her New York Times "Modern Love" piece about getting the brush-off from an indie rock musician, I Don't care About Your Band is marbled with the wry strains of Julie Klausner's precocious curmudgeonry and brimming with truths that anyone who's ever been on a date will relate to. Klausner is an expert at landing herself waist-deep in crazy, time and time again, in part because her experience as a comedy writer (Best Week Ever, TV Funhouse on SNL) and sketch comedian from NYC's Upright Citizens Brigade fuels her philosophy of how any scene should unfold, which is, "What? That sounds crazy? Okay, I'll do it." I Don't Care About Your Band charts a distinctly human journey of a strong-willed but vulnerable protagonist who loves men like it's her job, but who's done with guys who know more about love songs than love. Klausner's is a new outlook on dating in a time of pop culture obsession, and she spent her 20's doing personal field research to back up her philosophies. This is the girl's version of High Fidelity. By turns explicit, funny and moving, Klausner's debut shows the evolution of a young woman who endured myriad encounters with the wrong guys, to emerge with real- world wisdom on matters of the heart. I Don't Care About Your Band is Julie Klausner's manifesto, and every one of us can relate.

    Having blasted onto the small screens with his now legendary sitcom Spaced, his rise to nation's favourite son status has been mercurial, meteoric, megatronnic, but mostly just plain great.From his childhood (and subsequently adult) obsession with Star Wars, his often passionate friendship with Nick Frost, and his forays into stand-up which began with his regular Monday morning slot in front of his 12-year-old classmates, this is a joyous tale of a homegrown superstar and a local boy made good.

     In a culture that idealizes motherhood, it’s scary to confess that, in your house, being a mother is beautiful and dirty and joyful and frustrating all at once. Admitting that it’s not easy doesn’t make you a bad mom; at least, it shouldn’t. If I can’t survive my daughter as a toddler, how the hell am I going to get through the teenage years? When Jill Smokler was first home with her small children, she thought her blog would be something to keep friends and family updated. To her surprise, she hit a chord in the hearts of mothers everywhere. I end up doing my son’s homework. It’s wrong, but so much easier. Total strangers were contributing their views on that strange reality called motherhood. As other women shared their stories, Jill realized she wasn’t alone in her feelings of exhaustion and imperfection. My eighteen month old still can’t say “Mommy” but used the word “shit” in perfect context. But she sensed her readers were still holding back, so decided to start an anonymous confessional, a place where real moms could leave their most honest thoughts without fearing condemnation. I pretend to be happy but I cry every night in the shower. The reactions were amazing: some sad, some pee-in-your-pants funny, some brutally honest. But they were real, not a commercial glamorization. I clock out of motherhood at 8 P.M. and hide in the basement with my laptop and a beer. If you’re already a fan, lock the bathroom door on your whining kids, run a bubble bath, and settle in. If you’ve not encountered Scary Mommy before, break out a glass of champagne as well, because you’ll be toasting your initiation into a select club. I know why some animals eat their young. In chapters that cover husbands (The Biggest Baby of Them All) to homework (Didn’t I Already Graduate?), Confessions of a Scary Mommy combines all-new essays from Jill with the best of the anonymous confessions. Sometimes I wish my son was still little—then I hear kids screaming at the store. As Jill says, “We like to paint motherhood as picture perfect. A newborn peacefully resting on his mother’s chest. A toddler taking tentative first steps into his mother’s loving arms. A mother fluffing her daughter’s prom dress. These moments are indeed miraculous and joyful; they can also be few and far between.” Of course you adore your kids. Of course you would lay down your life for them. But be honest now: Have you ever wondered what possessed you to sign up for the job of motherhood? STOP! DO NOT OPEN THIS BOOK UNTIL YOU RECITE THESE VOWS! I shall remember that no mother is perfect and my children will thrive because, and sometimes even in spite, of me. I shall not preach to a fellow mother who has not asked my opinion. It’s none of my damn business. I shall maintain a sense of humor about all things motherhood.

    He has won more world championships than any other competitor, and he continues to change peoples’ minds about what can and can’t be done on a surfboard. His wild ride has included fame, fortune, a stint on Baywatch, and a high-profile relationship with Pamela Anderson. Not bad for a skinny kid from a broken home in Cocoa Beach, Florida.In Pipe Dreams, Kelly takes the reader into oceans around the world to take on thunderous walls of water and shares the outrageous stories, solemn moments, and undeniable spirit that have made him a superstar.

    Already a popular role model to all ages, in 2009 she captured the national spotlight again when she won the widely popular Dancing with the Stars. Yet Shawn is no stranger to hard work and adversity. Her loss of the major gymnastics prize everyone expected her to win in Beijing, the all-around Olympic gold medal, was the loss of a dream she'd worked for since childhood. And later, she suffered a potentially career-ending injury in a skiing accident that forced her life to a halt and made her rethink what was really important. She wasn't sure who she was anymore. She wasn't sure what her goals were. And she wasn't sure she was satisfied with where she was with her faith and God. Could she find the right kind of success in life--the kind that doesn't involve medals or trophies, but peace, love, and lasting joy? This is the amazing true journey of how the young woman who won an Olympic gold medal on the balance beam became even more balanced.

    He stands as the only man to accomplish the feat half-drunk and severely hung-over after partying all night with the cast of Saturday Night Live.Blowing away the industry standard of sanitized memoirs and stifling retrospectives, his memoir throws baseball a hilariously nasty curve. There are no weepy/sleepy tales of substance abuse here, no pompous lectures on “playing hard” or “overcoming adversity,” and under no circumstances will readers find even one Vaseline-smeared, gauze-softened tale of some long-lost, fairy-tale boys of summer.Written with unfiltered authenticity, and truckloads of locker-room humor, Perfect I'm Not sets loose the single most outspoken and entertaining player in the game at the time, allowing him to take both casual baseball fans and hardcore fanatics where they’ve never been allowed before: deep inside the real world of life as a major leaguer.