Keeping her end up while seven grown-up children tear about the fecking place like the eejits haven't got a home to go to.Packed with Mammy's tips for keeping a perfect family, or at least a family, as well as contributions from her children, neighbours and other hangers on, Mrs Brown's Family Handbook dispenses advice in her own inimical fecking style. You'll learn:• why every mammy's secret weapon is the tea towel• the dos and don't of cleaning up Granddad • what Dermot doesn't know about farting (not much)• what Winnie knows about seks (not enough)• all about the Five-Sausages-A-Day Diet (hint: contains sausages)• from Maria all about pain relief in child birth (if its free, take it)The perfect gift for anyone in a large family - it's one present and cheap - or with no family at all (seeing what they're missing might cheer the miserable feckers up), Mrs Brown's Family Handbook is also ideal for anyone sick and tired of giving out bloody DVDs for Christmas.Brendan O'Carroll is an Irish writer, producer, comedian, actor, director and author. He is best known for playing Agnes Brown in Mrs Brown's Boys, which won the best sitcom BAFTA in 2012. He has written four films and nine comedy shows, including The Course (1995), The Last Wedding (1999) and last year saw the release of his DVD for the live tour Good Mourning Mrs Brown. He has also published seven novels, including The Mammy, The Scrapper and The Young Wan - a number of which have been translated into 12 languages.

    In this first volume of his misadventures, Gussett sets his sights on the most prestigious prize in golf, the petrified middle finger of St. Andrew, patron saint of Scotland. Presiding over the world's most cantankerous golf club, Gussett must motivate his members through battles with incontinence, single malt Scotch, and a litany of other unmentionable afflictions in a friendly competition with their ancient rivals, the notorious McGregor clan. Anyone who loves the game or knows someone who does will be unable to resist Feherty's hilarious storytelling and golfing gravitas.

    On the verge of becoming a name in the interior design world, he can't afford a scandal and must discreetly dispose of the body—not an easy job when the whole of London seems to be conspiring against him.

    To date, this content has been curated from Wikipedia articles and images under Creative Commons licensing, although as Hephaestus Books continues to increase in scope and dimension, more licensed and public domain content is being added. We believe books such as this represent a new and exciting lexicon in the sharing of human knowledge. This particular book is a collaboration focused on Thursday Next series.

    But Nick and Gaye won’t budge.To add to her problems, Ronnie’s daughter and mother-in-law decide to stage an intervention. With her family keeping a close eye on her, Ronnie is forced to become more devious in her actions to get rid of Nick and Gaye.But just how far will she go?And is moving on ever that easy? Six Steps to Happiness is a hilarious look at just how far one woman will go to recover from a broken heart and find happiness again. What everyone is saying about Six Steps To Happiness: "I highly recommend this hilarious romance." "I definitely recommend this book, you won’t be disappointed!" "Some parts had me laughing and some parts left me wanting to cry." "A great happy read, with fun and laughter thrown in!" "A book with a message and also one with lots of smiles. Loved it." Suzie Tullett is the bestselling author of The French Escape, Little White Lies and Butterflies and The Trouble With Words. Six Steps To Happiness is an uplifting and laugh-out-loud Romantic comedy which will appeal to fans of authors like Sue Roberts, Marian Keyes and Sarah Morgan.

    But that’s what happens when medical technology goes awry. Doctors said they could train her brain to interpret digital signals from the camera in her artificial eye. The module even has wi-fi so they can monitor signal traffic across her optic nerve. What they didn’t anticipate was that her brain would figure out how to use the wi-fi connection both ways. Asha can now see the Internet. ASHA'S INTELLIGENCE IS NOT ARTIFICIAL As her digital brain develops, she creates an online AI by copying part of her mind to the cloud. The AI she calls Abbot becomes her right hand as she goes to work for the FBI tracking down international terrorists. Unfortunately, she is so effective, the government believes she may be a co-conspirator. When they refuse to pay her, she walks out. IT'S NOT JUST THE FBI WHO SUSPECT HER When Asha crosses paths with Chinese military hackers, she stops them by taking out Shanghai’s electrical grid. Now the communist government wants to know who did it and how. Things go downhill after Asha gives a copy of Abbot to her husband’s company. When the Chinese military steals a copy of it, they immediately recognize its military significance. Their top priority, however, is to take out the woman who came up with it in the first place. CHINA FLEXES ITS NEW CYBER WARFARE TOOL Using her own technology against her, the Chinese suddenly become a serious threat to the US. The FBI calls Asha back and ask one last favor: stop the Chinese attack. She agrees, but this time there are conditions. Either they pay upfront, or she will take care of the Asian threat in her own way, and knowing Asha, that could mean World War Three.

    Musical. STINKFOOT is an absurdist musical written by former Bonzo Dog Band frontman Vivian Stanshall (1943-1995) and his wife Ki Longfellow-Stanshall for their Old Profanity Showboat in Bristol. The musical was performed in December 1985 but has not been published before. The Sea Urchin edition will contain the script of the musical, lyrics and artwork by Vivian Stanshall, photos of the Bristol performances and an introduction by Ki Longfellow-Stanshall.

    He had been saving the pay he sweated so hard for, and he reckoned there was enough to set himself up with a spread of his own. He thought he might look into the Triple X Ranch, the one they called the Whiskey Brand. It had prime cattle land and was a bargain... or so it seemed.

    EarthCent's diplomats are learning on the job - but the galaxy doesn't come with instructions. Get a running start on the funny and heartwarming Union Station series with a three book bundle at the special introductory price. Kelly Frank is EarthCent's top diplomat on Union Station, but her job description has always been a bit vague. The pay is horrible and she's in hock up to her ears for her furniture, which is likely to end up in a corridor because she's behind on rent for her room. Sometimes she has to wonder if the career she has put ahead of her personal life for fifteen years is worth it. When Kelly receives a gift subscription to the dating service that's rumored to be powered by the same benevolent artificial intelligence that runs the huge station, she decides to swallow her pride and give it a shot. But as her dates go from bad to worse, she can only hope that the supposedly omniscient AI is planning a happy ending.

    Dreams of rose-covered cottages, rolling pins and two parents living with their own biological child were well and truly shattered.But now Juliette is engaged to her childhood sweetheart, Alex Dalton, and everything is looking up. Juliette can’t wait to marry Alex and live happily ever after at the Dalton Estate.The trouble is, Juliette isn’t the only one getting married this year. Her ex-partner, Nick, is getting married too and is trying his hardest to sabotage Juliette’s wedding day. Plus, there’s the small matter of the global Covid-19 pandemic.Will Juliette get the wedding of her dreams? Or will Nick succeed in ruining yet another wedding day?Wednesday 24th JuneAnother meeting with our wedding planner today – this time about party favours.Cressida showed us cute little hangover kits, personalised wine glasses, mini champagne bottles, chocolate truffle boxes, watches, toiletries, all sorts. There was even a monogrammed rum and Coca Cola can and a little treasure chest of sugared almonds, should we choose a Caribbean destination wedding.When Nick and I got married, all we thought about was drink, food and the church, in that order.Who knew there was so much sparkle and magic in the wedding world?Perfect for Jill Mansell and Unmumsy Mum fans. Can be read as a stand-along novel or as part of the series. Download this Kindle Unlimited comedy as part of your subscription.Editorial Reviews for Suzy K Quinn‘Suzy K Quinn is the literary equivalent of hot chocolate …’ – Liza Foreman, New York Times journalist'Suzy K Quinn is a born storyteller' -- Erin Kelly, bestselling author of He Said, She Said.'I read Suzy’s latest novel in one sitting, with a break for sleep. This does not usually happen. It's a terrific read.' -- Fay Weldon, author of the Lives and Loves of a She Devil.'Unputdownable. I was completely absorbed.' -- Julia Crouch, author of Cuckoo'A seriously skilful page turner ... don't read it on the beach unless you want sunburn.' -- Kate Harrison, author of The Secret Shopper's RevengeThe writing is skilful and vivid and the tension doesn't let up. Suzy K Quinn is one to watch.' -- Julia Gregson, author of East of the Sun“Funny, real, honest, and raw—this is an excellent book about the roller-coaster that is being a mum.” —Charlene Wedgner“Books like this, books that share honest and realistic experiences are a breath of fresh air.” —Diary of a Book Mum“I just love its honesty/real-ness and the way it ends on such a high note helped me to realize what a privilege it is to be a parent.” —Busy Mama Book Club“The reason I loved this book so much was the honesty of it! Unlike other parenting books nothing is sugar coated! This is Motherhood!! You will find yourself relating to almost everything she writes!” —B Club Betty“Would highly recommend this book for anyone looking for a fun and honest read about parenting.” —Em Digs Books“It’s funny, it’s quick, short chapters, all of these things are really important, easy read, when you’re a sleep deprived new mother. I really wish I had it when I was a new mum five years ago.” —The Motherload Book Club“A real breath of fresh air and a massive reality check for when you’re trying to be the perfect mum.” —Mrs Cooke’s Books“Had me in fits of laughter…I really do applaud Suzy for being so honest …She really does tell it like it is, which is that parenthood is a challenge but it’s totally worth it!” —Kirsty’s Book Buying AddictionAbout the AuthorSuzy is a bestselling British fiction author. Her books have sold nearly 1 million copies and been translated into nine different languages.

    She knows God handed her a life of hardship, especially when her Dad gives her away in marriage to a man she doesn't know. However, she proves to be a true mountain girl with spirit, determination, feistiness and fiery spunk. Laine's unabashed account of events, before and during the first months of her marriage, draws the reader spellbound into a story that will linger like mists shrouding distant mountains.

    

    In this lively collection, learn how an ordinary young man, Mahesh Das, became the beloved Raja Birbal we all know today, and how he uses his famous wit, time and again, to build a ‘celestial palace’ for Emperor Akbar, order a census of crows, trap a thief using a magic bamboo, and much more.Replete with wisdom and wit, and brought to life by Tapas Guha’s beautiful illustrations, this clever collection of stories also offers valuable life lessons hidden beneath its humour.

    Follow the flailing escapades of maverick music manager Campbell Ouiniette at the Calgary Folk Festival, as he leaves a trail of empty liquor bottles, cigarette butts, bruised egos, and obliterated relationships behind him. His top headlining act has abandoned him for the Big Time. In a fit of self-delusion or pure genius (or perhaps a bit of both), Ouiniette devises an intricate scam, a last hurrah in an attempt to redeem himself in the eyes of his girlfriend, the music industry, and the rest of the world. He reveals his path of destruction in his own transparently self-justifying, explosive, profane words, with digressions into the Edmonton hardcore punk rock scene, the Yugoslavian Civil War, and other epicentres of chaos.

    Each volume in the collection contains about 100 illustrations.