Inside, you'll find hundreds of jokes that are guaranteed to stir up a room full of smiles, including knock-knocks, witty puns, and one-liners. Complete with hilarious quotes from celebrities like Jon Stewart, Lewis Black, and Jerry Seinfeld, everyone will revel in each gut-busting moment.So whether you're looking to add a few jokes to your repertoire, impress your buds, or improve your banter, this sidesplitting book arms you with the perfect joke for any occasion!

    Warned off investigating a friend’s missing report, Jake rebels and returns home to the Pacific Northwest to find his friend has died in a fiery demolition derby. Jake alone believes it is murder and now he is the next target of someone anticipating his every move. Estranged from his family, Jake turns to a native shaman to unlock cryptic rock art clues to the murder and follow their trail across the high-desert landscape. The stakes rise when Jake uncovers more than a murder. Jake races the clock to expose a band of mercenaries tangled in a conspiracy sixty years in the making, as the land he loves teeters on the brink of an ecological Armageddon.

    Learn how to transform your dog's cellular health with the power of nutrigenomics in this ground-breaking new book. Nutrigenomics (a combination of the words nutrition and genome) is the study of how the foods we and our pets eat "speak" to our cells to regulate gene expression, which in turn plays a huge role in determining whether a person or animal will live a life of vibrant health, or one plagued by illness. Scientists now know that while we can't change the genes we are born with, we can change how those genes behave, which is exactly what authors W. Jean Dodds, DVM and Diana Laverdure-Dunetz, MS show us how to do in, Canine Nutrigenomics: The New Science of Feeding Your Dog for Optimum Health from Dogwise Publishing.

    Then he mowed the lawn (again) and knew his life was over. His wife was happy doing her crosswords, but Stanley felt like an old age pensioner with nothing to look forward to apart from sitting in his chair, watching daytime TV, and walking his dog, Roobarb. On a whim, after yet another wet walk with his overweight pooch, he put an advert in the corner shop window: Old Age Pensioner Investigations. No job too big, or small. From murder to missing cats, Detective Stanley can solve it all. He went home, got told off for letting Roobarb get mud on the lino, stared at Custard the cat who stole the only biscuit he was allowed a day (he was putting on weight), and fell asleep in his chair. Then the doorbell rang. He had a case. The old age private eye was in business. Now all he had to do was actually solve a murder. Oh, and get a pad, and a pen, and maybe detectives had cars too, and secretaries, and offices... He wasn't bored any more, that was the main thing. Plus the murder mystery, of course.

    This book highlights her foster and forever dogs' antics and challenges.A portion of proceeds is donated back to Cocker Spaniel rescue.Excerpt: Nine-year-old Rags was found roaming the streets as a stray. When she landed at the shelter, she needed six baths to free her from the oil in which she was covered. Her little rear had no fur, and the skin in that area was as tough as leather. Her issues were severe, including water-filled blisters on her feet and legs.Poor Rags was the saddest-looking Cocker I had ever seen. Her eyes were downcast and droopy, and the fur around them was gone. She certainly was not very attractive.For many long months we treated Rags with antibiotics, and we bathed her three times a week with medicated shampoo. She was a good patient, never complaining even though she had to soak in the bathtub for 10 minutes each time.Finally, our efforts paid off, and a new dog emerged. At adoption events, people commented on Rags' beauty and her soulful face. This was progress! Now, our task was to convince some special person to look beyond her age...Does Rags find a home? Buy the book to find out!

    a canine-human Esther Perel' The ObserverWouldn't you love to know what your dog was thinking?The truth is that your dog is communicating with you all the time but, unless you know the signs, you aren't picking up on what your dog wants you to know. Louise Glazebrook is a dog behaviourist, trainer and television presenter who specialises in teaching people how to understand and connect with their dogs. In The Book Your Dog Wishes You Would Read, Louise tackles everything from bringing the right dog home, understanding body language and breed behaviour, responding to common behavioural issues, to the toys and games that you and your dog will both love.Most dog trainers focus on the dog, but Louise focuses on you, the owner, giving you the skills and confidence to interpret your dog's needs and behaviour and build a better, happier relationship for life.

    These are the lucky ones. Five to seven million companion animals enter shelters every year, and more than half are euthanized due to the lack of space. Miracle Dogs celebrates and honors the rescuers and the dogs whose lives they've saved. It features wonderful stories and photographs of dog rescuers, dog trainers, and rescue organizations such as The Gentle Barn and Tamar Geller's Operation Heroes and Hounds, along with celebrity pet owners such as Chevy Chase, Hoda Kotb, Bob Einstein, Amanda Hearst, Jamie Lynn Siegler, and Lance Bass. Each story includes portraits of the dog and its new family, followed by a concise, compelling narrative detailing the dog's journey to its new home.A professional pet photographer, Liz Stavrinides spends much of her time on projects related to animal rescue. Miracle Dogs was born out of her desire to collect and share the stories of the dogs she's met over the years, showcasing the incredible bravery and compassion of both canines and owners. Readers will be moved by stories like that of Wyatt, an assistance dog who helped a young boy with autism communicate with the outside world, or Fiona, who was found blind and starving and is now in a loving family. All of them have finally found their furever homes. Stavrinides' portraits are heartwarming—a loving and poignant tribute to man's best friend.

    But while the beautiful scenery certainly offers plenty of scope for contemplation, a night out with an eligible bachelor soon seems more remote than the farm itself. And once you add fugitive sheep and freak blizzards into the mix, Emma's dreams of a happy future at Fallowlees Farm quickly begin to fade.Throughout the long nights of lambing, the highs and lows of the local sheepdog trials and the day-to-day chores of maintaining a large, ramshackle farm, Emma's collies are her most loyal companions. With Bill, Fly, Roy and Alfie by her side, she'll never really be alone.Emma's remarkable first year at Fallowlees - the triumphs, the disasters, the heartbreak and the glimmer of romance on the horizon - is an inspiration for anyone who has ever dreamt of changing their life and starting all over again.____________________________________________________________Readers love ONE GIRL AND HER DOGS: 'This is an amazing book, difficult to put down. A must for all thinking of living of the land, or looking to be inspired by a hard working courageous young woman''What a little gem of a book, I loved it. Emma has given us a little taste of her life in the remote Fallowlees Farm in Northumberland, her knowledge of lambing is just astonishing to me and her beautiful dogs are amazing, I must admit to shedding a tear now and then, but there was plenty to chuckle at too''An admirable book''Very entertaining and readable. A brave girl who made the decision to become a sheep farmer and farm in a lovely and lonely spot''This story is written in such a way that you feel you are actually on the farm and going through the trials too. Wonderful empathy with her dogs and an excellent storyteller'

    An open bedroom door. An ill-timed squat. Dogs seem to have impeccable timing. Yet how quickly calamity turns to comedy in the company of a dog, and the wrong moment turns out to be just the right one. In this delightful follow-up to Dog Is My Co-Pilot, which won the Best Book of the Year award from the Dog Writers Association of America, the editors of The Bark bring together more stories, essays, and artwork that highlight the hilarity of dog behavior and the comical interactions between dog people and their four-legged friends. From playful puppies who wreak havoc in the home to dogs with a whole array of comic shticks and tricks, Howl celebrates the verve and the laughs pets offer their people. It includes laugh-out-loud reflections (and confessions), rib-tickling tales, and whimsical vignettes from well-known writers such as:• Dave Barry• Margaret Cho• Al Franken• Kinky Friedman• Pam Houston• Haven Kimmel• Neal Pollack• And many more!From the Hardcover edition.

    Nesheim, Ph.D., a Cornell animal nutrition expert, to write Feed Your Pet Right, the first complete, research-based guide to selecting the best, most healthful foods for your cat or dog.Human nutrition expert and author of the critically acclaimed What to Eat, Marion Nestle, Ph.D., M.P.H., has joined forces with Malden C. Nesheim, Ph.D., a Cornell animal nutrition expert, to write Feed Your Pet Right, the first complete, research-based guide to selecting the best, most healthful foods for your cat or dog. A comprehensive and objective look at the science behind pet food, it tells a fascinating story while evaluating the range of products available and examining the booming pet food industry and its marketing practices. Drs. Nestle and Nesheim also present the results of their unique research into this sometimes secretive industry. Through conversations with pet food manufacturers and firsthand observations, they reveal how some companies have refused to answer questions or permit visits. The authors also analyze food products, basic ingredients, sources of ingredients, and the optimal ways to feed companion animals. In this engaging narrative, they explain how ethical considerations affect pet food research and product development, how pet foods are regulated, and how companies influence veterinary training and advice. They conclude with specific recommendations for pet owners, the pet food industry, and regulators. A road map to the most nutritious diets for cats and dogs, Feed Your Pet Right is sure to be a reference classic to which all pet owners will turn for years to come.

    With nearly a million Facebook fans, and adding more each day, Boo is poised to become an international superstar. This charming book features exclusive new photographs of Boo doing all his favorite things: lounging around, playing with friends, exploring the whole wide world, and making those famous puppy-dog eyes. To know Boo is to love him, and this book is for anyone who loves the cutest dog ever.

    A magical book celebrating the timeless connection between people and their "forever dogs."

    You just can’t get enough of those big soulful eyes or his cute little antics…until you step in his not so adorable doggy mess on your new beige carpet. That’s when you know – it’s really time to start housetraining. So you’ve made the decision to start housetraining Fido but you have no idea how to go about it. Do you yell, do you praise, do you give him the evil eye? Housetraining for Dummies takes all the guesswork out of housetraining your dog and demystifies the entire process. Award-winning author, Susan McCullough, who specializes in dog training and care gives you all the answers to potty training your dog – whether it’s a puppy or an adult – in plain English so you can train Fido faster and save your carpet from those tell-tale stains. You’ll get practical advice about:•Your dog’s instincts and learning style•The right approach for housetraining your dog•Housetraining gear, including crate, collar and leash, and cleanup equipment•Indoor training•Outdoor training•What and how to feed your dogMcCullough shares all of her insider advice as well as her own horror and success stories to make housetraining as easy as possible for you and your pooch. Housetraining for Dummies includes helpful tips, reminders, warnings, and information on:•Puppy versus adult housetraining•Recognizing your dog’s potty style•Training your dog to pee on command•Avoidable housetraining mistakes•Problem potty-ers and how to help themYou don’t have to keep sending Fido to the doghouse because of those puddles or piles. Housetraining for Dummies makes it easy for you to housetrain him so you can both enjoy the great indoors again.

    The warm and joyful memoirs of his life as a country vet in Yorkshire have endeared him to countless readers around the world, and many of his most memorable tales featured man's best friend.Here are the complete dog stories from his much-beloved memoirs: a handsome collection of tales, available for the first time in trade paperback, that will warm the hearts of dog lovers around the world. Featuring a special introduction by the author and his own accompanying notes to each specially illustrated story, this tribute from man to dog is a volume no Herriot fan will want to be without.