Note: These texting fails contain profanity, not for children.When are people going to learn that autocorrect can't be trusted? With FAILS like these, we actually hope that's not for a long time.This book complies 101 of the funniest, most viral and cringeworthy autocorrect screenshots to date.Guaranteed to put you on the floor laughing!

    A handbook for the happy, and a bible for the broken-hearted, The Alphabet of the Human Heart is an enchanting and enriching journey through the upside and the downside of what it means to be human – our hopes and our fears, our strengths and our weaknesses, our highs and our lows.

    By examining the work produced by writers at the end of their lives, it elucidates the difference between growing old and disintegrating.

    Si todos debemos movernos para sobrevivir, vale la pena preguntarse: ¿qué factores de nuestro entorno nos impulsan a movernos y cuáles, por el contrario, nos detienen? ¿Por qué algunas personas tienen la oportunidad de moverse hacia donde quieren y otras no? ¿Por qué ciertas sociedades evolucionan y otras no? Para responder a estas interrogantes, los autores del libro estudiaron los códigos culturales y el comportamiento Bio-Lógico de 71 países para desarrollar un índice de que permite medir la movilidad social dentro de estas sociedades.Andrés Roemer y Clotaire Rapaille señalan que las culturas más exitosas son aquellas que han sabido preservar los mejores aspectos de su tradición, al mismo tiempo que han estado dispuestas a innovar y buscar nuevos horizontes. Se trata de sociedades abiertas al cambio y sin temor al statu quo. Otra clave del éxito evolutivo de las sociedades es el equilibrio entre el aspecto biológico (determinado por cuatro factores: supervivencia, sexo, seguridad y superación) y el aspecto cultural. El reto, concluyen los autores, es aprender a armonizar nuestros instintos (nuestro cerebro reptiliano) con nuestras emociones (nuestro cerebro límbico) y nuestra lógica (el neocórtex).ENGLISH DESCRIPTION If we all know we must move to survive, shouldn’t we ask ourselves which factors in our environment propel us and which halt us? Why do certain societies evolve while others don’t? In this book, Andrés Roemer and Clotaire Rapaille point out that the most successful cultures are those that are not afraid of the status quo: they have learned to preserve the best qualities of their traditions while being open to innovation and to uncovering new horizons. Another key to the success of these societies is the equilibrium between biological and the cultural aspects. The challenge is to harmonize our instincts, our emotions, and our logic.

    Under the Twitter (@pants) and Instagram handle @PantsPants, Josh Mecouch has a large following who delight in his bizarre and unique illustrations. Now, Conquer the Day invites fans into the larger Pants universe, introducing new characters and never-before-seen art. Pairing encouraging affirmations with emotive black-and-white illustrations—highlighted with the occasional splash of color—Josh takes us on a journey into the world of self-improvement. The contrast between the positive affirmations and the visceral style of the illustrations point to the tension between our hopes and aspirations and the reality of our day-to-day lives as we strive to realize our best selves.Unlock the power of affirmations:I exhale weakness and inhale confidence.I am sexy and people want to be around me.My path to sucess success is inevitable.I focus on what I can control. I organize my socks.

    Tip well. Never use the word "blossom." Outperform the GPS. Know how to chug a beer (and know that you shouldn't). Always hold the door. Never use emoticons.These are The Maxims of Manhood. They cover every aspect of life: women, sports, sex, the office, family, entertainment, fashion, fitness, and more women. Some of these you'd expect. Some you wouldn't, as they usher in amodern code of masculinity (Your favorite book may not be The Da Vinci Code). In a series of 100 essays, the rules are analyzed, explained, vigorously defended and openly mocked. Every rule has an authorized exception. Except the ones that don't.This book might not be for you. It's only intended for people who fall into one of these seven buckets: 1) you are a man; 2) you will become a man; 3) you were once a man; 4) you are related to a man; 5) you are dating or have married a man; 6) you think that in the future, perhaps, you will date or marry a man; 7) you know, or think that at some point you will know—whether casually or formally—a man.

    With more than nine thousand tweets and ninety thousand followers, he's proven himself a stalwart of holy hilarity. This poetic collection of the Curmudgeon's best 140-character compositions will make you ROFL as you recognize the regular cast of churchy characters, including the worship leader, the usher team, and maybe even yourself. One more to whet your appetite: "Usually when the writing is on the wall, it portends the death of a culture. But hey, fine, throw out the hymnals and use a projector." Author bio: Church Curmudgeon is the old guy who sits on the back pew of the sanctuary, farthest from the drums (he measured). You can find his complaints on Twitter (@ChrchCurmudgeon) and Facebook.

    It seeks to unveil the mystery of that man. Historians tell us Muhammad used to withdraw to a cave, spending days wrapped in his thoughts. He heard bells ringing and had ghostly visions. He thought he was demon possessed, until his wife reassured him he had become a prophet. Convinced of his status, he was intolerant of those who rejected him, assassinated those who criticized him, raided, looted, and massacred entire populations. He reduced thousands to slavery, raped, and allowed his men to rape female captives. All of this, he did with a clear conscience and a sense of entitlement. He was magnanimous toward those who admired him, but vengeful toward those who did not. He believed he was the most perfect human creation and the universe's raison d'être. Muhammad was no ordinary man. He was a narcissist. Understanding Muhammad, ventures beyond the stories. Focusing on the "why" rather than the "what," it unravels the mystique of one of the most enigmatic and influential men in history.

    And she got one-coming at her at forty miles per hour. Hit by a car and suffering debilitating injuries, and with no health insurance, the fashionista attempts to bounce back into her (thrift store-purchased) Jimmy Choos even as she deals with short-term memory loss, stalker ambulance drivers, trying to stay vegan on food stamps, crazy judges, hot doctors, and unsympathetic government workers.Inspired by her acclaimed one-woman show, this is a bitingly funny and keenly observed account of the cracks in our medical and social welfare system and how one woman's resilience combined with a generous dollop of humor helped her fight her way to recovery.

    “Just when we thought the lawlessness in Iraq was over,” O’Farrell observes, “even more blatant incidents of looting have begun. With handkerchiefs masking their faces, two rioters roughly the height of George Bush and Donald Rumsfeld kicked in the gates of the largest oilfield and grabbed the keys of the gasoline trucks. ‘Yee-haw! It’s all ours! Millions of barrels of the stuff’ they laughed. ‘Yup!’ added the leader ‘ and this mask guarantees my anonymousinity!’ So after all these years there really is such a person as the Thief of Baghdad. Except strangely his accent sounded vaguely Texan.”A writer for the groundbreaking television show Spitting Image and contributor to the screenplay for the hit movie Chicken Run, O’Farrell meticulously researched his conclusions “by spending five minutes on the internet and then giving up.” And while O’Farrell’s sharpest barbs and stingers have often been written to come out of the mouths of grotesque puppets and Claymation chickens, this time around he keeps the best lines for himself: ‘‘With the election of the 43rd President of the United States, the global village is complete,” O’Farrell writes. “’It has its own global village idiot.’”

    Grab it while it's practically FREE.Thanks to your support, "How to Master Lucid Dreaming" became a #1 Bestseller in 6 different categories including: Spirituality, Personal Growth, Self-Help. You're missing out on an ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE part of your life. It's time to change that. There are a ridiculous amount of techniques online for lucid dreaming. Too many. Enough to overwhelm any beginner and annoy any expert. This book is a journey into mastery of lucid dreaming. No more trying random techniques from forums. It's time to build a sustainable practice and delve into the depths of your consciousness.I've helped thousands of people with lucid dreaming over the past 9 years. It's your turn. What's Included in the Book - The Biggest Obstacle to Lucid Dreaming and How to Overcome It- How to Achieve Anything You Set Your Mind To- How to Use Your Mind as a Rocket Booster Instead of Dead Weight- How to Remember More of Your Life With a Stupidly Simple Practice- The Forgotten Jewel of a Hidden Type of Memory- Why You've Been Doing Reality Checks Completely Wrong (and totally wasting your time)- How to Completely Let Go of Your Stressful Day- How Not To Waste Time With Lucid Dreaming Techniques- The 5 Things Every Good Lucid Dreaming Technique Has in Common- 5 Steps to Mastering Your TechniqueIf you just want to experience lucid dreaming once, then move on, this book isn't for you. But if you want to master lucid dreaming and be able to experience it any time you want, get this book. What are the Benefits of Lucid Dreaming? - Deep personal and spiritual exploration into the nature of consciousness and who you really are- Receive life-changing information from your subconscious- Artistic and creative Inspiration (imagine composing music while flying in the sky with rainbow colored sound streaming all around you...)- Wipe away years of minor depression- FUN! Fun! FUN! Tons of fun- Overcome fears that are holding you back in life- Explore different realms that you'll suddenly have access to- Heal emotional traumas through interacting directly with your subconscious mind- Overcome nasty nightmares that leave you feeling crappy in the morning- Add more hours of actually being ALIVE every day- Shift your entire perspective on life, reality, consciousness and what it's all about- Soar like a bird in the sky, feeling the wind against your skin (one of the most amazing experiences ever) What people are saying about the book "I'm on day 3 of the program today and had my first lucid dream last night! Thank you sooooo much for this book, I am loooving it and soo excited about my own lucid journey!"- Jess Webb"I’ve got LaBerge’s course, Lucid Dreaming Secrets Unveiled by Darius Thomas, Robert Waggoner’s Lucid Dream Workshop, etc. etc...

    Further extrapolating on the ideas in his wildly popular viral youtube talk to the Heritage Foundation, that has received over 600k hits, Evan Sayet uses his signature wit in this new book to ask thought- provoking questions during these turbulent economic and social times. And he provides the reader with some surprising answers. Andrew Breitbart said that Evan Sayet's Heritage Foundation Speech was 'one of the five most important conservative speeches ever given.' That speech was the foundation for this book. How did the song "Imagine" by John Lennon become the perfect symbol of liberal thinking? Why does Bruce Springsteen dub "pain" as the wages of toil and hard work? What's the Democrats' beef with God? What do they have against the Jews of Israel? Why do they want abortion to be commonplace and frequent? Why does the Modern Liberal -the dominant force in today's Democratic Party and in so much of today's popular culture - seem to always side with evil over good, wrong over right and the behaviors that lead to failure over those that lead to success? Evan Sayet answers those questions and a lot more.

    In the meantime, if you'd like to read something that alternates between laugh-out-loud-funny and apocalyptically angry, keep holding this book. Steal it if necessary. In his latest collection of rants, raves, hastily spluttered articles and scarcely literate scrawl, Charlie Brooker proves that there is almost nothing in this universe, big or small, that can't reduce a human being to a state of pure blind hatred. It won't help you lose weight, feel smarter, sleep more soundly, or feel happier about yourself. It will provide you with literally hours of distraction and merriment. It can also be used to stun an intruder, if you hit him with it correctly (hint: strike hard, using the spine, on the bridge of the nose). Only a prick wouldn't buy this book. Don't be that prick.

    Many of them don’t survive their ordeals and those who do are often either too afraid or too ashamed to speak. If I Live to Tell is unique in that respect. It’s a real, first-person look at the world from the perspective of a woman who has endured tragedy, heartbreak, abuse and betrayal at almost every point in her life.Set on three continents, If I Live to Tell is a rare glimpse into the world and heart of the largely invisible victimized woman. Following one woman’s struggle to discover purpose and identity, If I Live to Tell shows how tragedy can become triumph and how pain can turn to purpose. This is a true story like you’ve never heard before.

    In the space of a single horrendous day, Merry’s boss kicks her out to pasture, her husband ditches her for a barely legal floozy, and she decides to end it all. (But she doesn’t have cancer, no matter what her doctor says, so at least she’s got that going for her.)Determined to hurl herself into an early grave, Merry flies home to Greece for one last hurrah. But Greece has other plans for Merry, and before long she enthusiastically decides to give living one more shot.Too bad she no longer has any say in the matter.