Thompson's legions of fans have waited a decade for this book. They will not be disappointed. His notorious Screwjack is as salacious, unsettling, and brutally lyrical as it has been rumored to be since the private printing in 1991 of three hundred fine collectors' copies and twenty-six leather-bound presentation copies. Only the first of the three pieces included here—"Mescalito," published in Thompson's 1990 collection Songs of the Doomed—has been available to the public, making the trade edition of Screwjack a major publishing event. "We live in a jungle of pending disasters," Thompson warns in "Mescalito," a chronicle of his first mescaline experience and what it sparked in him while he was alone in an L.A. hotel room in February 1969—including a bout of paranoia that would have made most people just scream no, once and for all. But for Thompson, along with the downside came a burst of creativity too powerful to ignore. The result is a poetic, perceptive, and wildly funny stream-of-consciousness take on 1969 America as only Hunter S. Thompson could see it. Screwjack just gets weirder with its second offering, "Death of a Poet." As Thompson describes this trailer-park confrontation with the dark side of a deservingly doomed friend: "Whoops, I thought. Welcome to the night train." The heart of the collection lies in its final, title piece, an unnaturally poignant love story. What makes the romantic tale "Screwjack" so touching, for all its queerness, is the aching melancholy in its depiction of the modern man's burden: that "we are doomed. Mama has gone off to Real Estate School...and after that maybe even to Law School. We will never see her again." Ostensibly written by Raoul Duke, "Screwjack" begins with an editor's note explaining of Thompson's alter ego that "the first few lines contain no warning of the madness and fear and lust that came more and more to plague him and dominate his life...." "I am guilty, Lord," Thompson writes, "but I am also a lover—and I am one of your best people, as you know; and yea tho I have walked in many strange shadows and acted crazy from time to time and even drooled on many High Priests, I have not been an embarrassment to you...." Nor has Hunter S. Thompson been to American literature. Quite the contrary: What the legendary Gonzo journalist proves with Screwjack is just how brilliant a prose stylist he really is, amid all the hilarity. As Thompson puts it in his introduction, the three stories here "build like Bolero to a faster & wilder climax that will drag the reader relentlessly up a hill, & then drop him off a cliff....That is the Desired Effect."

    Baiting is the art of luring unsuspecting pedophiles (as well as the occasional religious zealots and others) into online chat with a false persona and then turning the conversations into the most vile, merciless and hilariously abusive logs ever recorded on the World Wide Web. This book will leave you less afraid of internet predators, yet more terrified knowing that people this stupid live among us without supervision. Either way, you will never look at Instant Messenger the same way again.

    Stephanie O'Dea's 200 delicious recipes includeBaked Herbed FetaSmoky Bean and Corn SoupMaple-Glazed Pork ChopsMoroccan Chicken with LentilsApple-Pecan Bread PuddingOrange and Honey TilapiaChocolate Pot de Creme with Ganache--and many more. More Make It Fast, Cook It Slow is the perfect cookbook for easy-to-prepare meals that don't take a toll on the family budget.

    There's food in there, but then what? It'll have to be cooked... or at least peeled. Probably both. It's enough to scare even the foolhardy, but then so is a diet of macaroni and cheese. And you can't afford to keep ordering pizza. Aaarghh!Relax! You're not alone. Author Evelyn Raab (mom to two teenage sons) understands that the kitchen is alien territory, and she is going to teach you everything you need to know to produce something deliciously edible out of actual ingredients -- in other words, cook -- and live to tell the tale.Incredibly thorough, never condescending, and with a dash of humor, Clueless in the Kitchen leads culinary neophytes through the entire range of kitchen experience -- from cleaning a stove and outfitting a first kitchen (cheaply), to unplugging a drain and identifying that stuff in the bulk-food bins. Two hundred easy-to-follow recipes show how to make all kinds of simple and scrumptious dishes for every meal and occasion, beginning with "Breakfast: A Cruel Joke" and ending with Snacks and Munchies." There's even a chapter devoted exclusively to the "Vehemently Vegetarian."And there's more! Each recipe is coded with an icon symbolizing vegetarian meals, cheap eats, couch potato, mom, or family food, food to impress, and snacks and munchies. And useful menu planners will help you tailor the perfect meal to every guest, whether that guest is your shallow but fun boy/girlfriend, your aunt Gladys, or (gasp!) your entire family.Whether you're living on your own for the very first time or you're just on your own for dinner, Clueless in the Kitchen will be the first and -- hopefully -- only guide you will ever need. You may never eat macaroni and cheese again!

    When he began to write the first, he could not prune a rose. When he began to write the second, he could not boil an egg. Perhaps this is why both books remain fresh and eminently readable. The phrase 'kitchen sink' may suggest squalor and disillusionment, but Beverley Nichols transforms it into a symbol of merriment and adventure. With a new foreword by Roy Dicks and Val Biro's charming drawings, the Timber Press edition of Down the Kitchen Sink deservedly takes its place among Beverley's classics on gardens, homes, cats, and other friends.

    Completely updating it for the first time since 1979, Marion Cunningham made Fannie Farmer once again a household word for a new generation of cooks.What makes this basic cookbook so distinctive is that Marion Cunningham, who is the personification of the nineteenth-century teacher, is always at your side with her forthright tips and comments, encouraging the beginning cook and inspiring the more adventurous. She knows what today's cooks are looking for, and she has a way of instilling confidence and joy in the act of cooking.In giving the book new life, Mrs. Cunningham has been careful always to preserve the best of the old. She has retained all the particularly good, tried-and-true recipes from preceding editions, retesting and rewriting when necessary. She has rediscovered lost treasures, including delicious recipes that were eliminated when practically no one baked bread at home. This is now the place to find the finest possible recipes for Pumpkin Soup, Boston Baked Beans, Carpetbag Steak, Roast Stuffed Turkey, Anadama Bread, Indian Pudding, Apple Pie, and all of the other traditional favorites.The new recipes reflect ethnic influences--Mediterranean, Moroccan, Asian--that have been adding their flavors to American cooking in recent years. Tucked in among all your favorites like Old-Fashioned Beef Stew, New England Clam Chowder, Ham Timbales, and Chicken Jambalaya, you'll find her cool Cucumber Sushi, Enchiladas with Chicken and Green Sauce, or a layered dish of Polenta and Fish to add variety to your repertoire. Always a champion of old-fashioned breakfasts and delectable desserts, Mrs. Cunningham has many splendid new offerings to tempt you.Throughout, cooking terms and procedures are explained, essential ingredients are spelled out, basic equipment is assessed. Mrs. Cunningham even tells you how to make a good cup of coffee and how to brew tea properly.For the diet-conscious, there is an expanded nutritional chart that includes a breakdown of cholesterol and fat in common ingredients as well as in Fannie Farmer basic recipes. Where the taste of a dish would not be altered, Mrs. Cunningham has reduced the amount of cream and butter in some of the recipes from the preceding edition. She carefully evaluates the issues of food safety today and alerts us to potential hazards.But the emphasis here is always on good flavor, fresh ingredients, and lots of variety in one's daily fare, which Marion Cunningham believes is the secret to a healthy diet. Dedicated to the home cooks of America, young and old, this thirteenth edition of the book that won the hearts of Americans more than a century ago invites us all--as did the original Fannie Farmer--to cherish the delights of the family table.

    It’ll have you scratching your head wondering why we even bother to go to school.Think Magellan was the first man to circumnavigate the globe, baseball was invented in America, Henry VIII had six wives, Mount Everest is the tallest mountain? Wrong, wrong, wrong, and wrong again. You’ll be surprised at how much you don’t know! Check out THE BOOK OF GENERAL IGNORANCE for more fun entries and complete answers to the following:How long can a chicken live without its head?About two years.What do chameleons do?They don’t change color to match the background. Never have; never will. Complete myth. Utter fabrication. Total Lie. They change color as a result of different emotional states.How many legs does a centipede have?Not a hundred.How many toes has a two-toed sloth?It’s either six or eight.Who was the first American president?Peyton Randolph.What were George Washington’s false teeth made from?Mostly hippopotamus.What was James Bond’s favorite drink?Not the vodka martini.

    Nancy? He's a superstitious Vegas high-roller who wants to gamble at a casino in his lucky shrimp outfit...He's the genius inventor of "Six Day Underwear"...He's a stage actor who only travels while dressed as a stick of butter...He is, in reality, a twisted prankster—a supremely off-kilter alter ego who sends patently ridiculous letters to corporate honchos, entertainment conglomerates, national publications, politicians, celebrities and heads of state. His innocent requests, queries, complaints, demands, and suggestions are so absurd it is amazing they fool anyone—but often the deadpan responses he receives are even more hilarious: "Dear Mr. Nancy, It is not often that we receive such enthusiastic support for the paper bag."  —The Paper Bag Council"On behalf of Greyhound, there should be no problem traveling while in your butter costume." —Greyhound Bus Lines"I look forward to working with you to create a better future for this great nation." —Vice President Al GoreLetters From A Nut is an insanely inspired, truly madcap collection of Nancy correspondence, a wet-yourself-in-a-public place funny aggregation of official—and officially certifiable—requests, complaints, fan mail and questions that could not possibly have been taken seriously...but, amazingly, were.

    Rhoda Morgenstern) takes on those phony "fabulous at 50" books written by women whose skin is free of laugh lines and who wouldn't know a cellulite pocket if it bit them on the backside. With her trademark shoot-from-the-hip, call-'em-like-she-sees-'em style, she helps women celebrate, with humor and grace, what it means to be middle aged.Harper's essays explore the treacherous terrain women must travel -- from the tyrannies of fashion to the unmentionables of menopause. She tackles the most perplexing questions of the day: If you wear a size zero, do you exist? Would menopause be revered if it happened to men? Do calories count if you eat standing up? Are dressing rooms fitted with fun house mirrors? Today I Am a Ma'am is the perfect antidote to the youth obsession of our culture, offered by America's most reliable girlfriend. It is Humor Replacement Therapy for midlife women, a book you can pick up when ever you need a laugh or a reminder that midriff drift is not the end of the world.

    Even the wealthy, powerful, and world-renowned must ultimately meet their Maker—though some have departed this life more ignobly than they might have wished.From Mozart to rock and roll, which performers ended their lives on the wrong note?What famous U.S. bridge is named after an explorer who was eaten by cannibals?Everyone wants to hit the lottery, but does Lady Luck visit winners with deadly fangs?Plus: Learn the real fate of Gilligan's Island castaways and all your favorite TV actors as well as famous writers, senators, saints, dictators, and philosophers, among many others.Michael Largo, the man who illuminated readers on the myriad ways of death in Final Exits, has compiled a fascinating, off-beat, and darkly humorous necrology that provides the grim, often outrageous details about the passing of influential persons. Meticulously researched—employing archaeological records, published obituaries, official documents, and forensic evidence—this authoritative, one-of-a-kind reference presents the unabashed truth about a multitude of celebrity deaths, while examining the various deeds, misdeeds, and lifestyle quirks that hastened the demise and determined the departed's role in history and popular myth. The Portable Obituary has the skinny on what made our late icons—whether through overindulgence or neglect: on the john, in the sack, or in some spectacular accident—what they are today: dead!

          Written and compiled by the Lord of Evil himself, The Adventure Time Encyclopaedia matches the playful, subversive tone of the series, detailing everything anyone will ever need to know about the postapocalyptic land of Ooo and its inhabitants—secret lore and spells, fun places you should visit and places where you will probably die, whom to marry and whom not to marry, how to make friends and how to destroy your enemies—plus hand-written marginalia by Finn, Jake, and Marceline. An indispensable companion to the show, this side-splittingly funny love letter to Adventure Time is sure to appeal to fans of all ages. Heck yeah! From the Back Cover: Written by the Lord of Evil Himself, Hunson Abadeer (a.k.a. Marceline the Vampire Queen's dad), to instruct and confound the demonic citizenry of the Nightosphere, The Adventure Time Encyclopaedia is perhaps the most dangerous book in history. Although seemingly a guidebook to the Land of Ooo and its postapocalyptic inhabitants, it is in fact an amusing nightmare of literary pitfalls, bombastic brain-boggles, and ancient texts designed to drive the reader mad.  Complete with secret lore and wizard spells, fun places you should visit and places where you will probably die, advice on whom to marry and whom not to marry, and how to make friends and destroy your enemies, this volume includes hand-written marginalia by Finn, Jake, and Marceline. Arguably the greatest encyclopaedia ever written since the beginning of the cosmos, it is also an indispensable companion to humans and demons who know what time it is: Adventure Time!

    After spending the first half of his life as an adamant omnivore, Lindstrom went 100% vegan. Reluctantly. Overnight. From burgers to beets, from pork to parsnips.It’s time for a down-to-earth book that proves anyone can go vegan (even someone who once ate sixty-eight chicken wings in a sitting). How can a man adopt a vegan approach? Won’t he die of protein deficiency? What if he is married to a vegan woman? How would he order a salad at a Minnesota steakhouse? What should he bring to a gluten-free, nut-free, macrobiotic, nightshade-free, oil-free, vegan potluck (true story)?The Skeptical Vegan explains how simple it really is to be vegan, covering topics from food and nutrition to social challenges and lifestyle. Snarky, witty, and opinionated to a fault, Lindstrom speaks as a male vegan, contesting the notion that “real men” should only eat meat. With twenty original “veganized” recipes including portobello steaks, carrot hot dogs, tofu wings, “meaty” chili, and cauliflower bites (which helped him shed thirty pounds), Lindstrom demonstrates how to take control of your diet while still eating “meatily” and taking into account the ethical considerations of living a better life for the animals, the environment, and yourself.

    Provides diagrams and detailed instructions for performing more than three hundred magic tricks, including tricks with cards, money, ropes, handkerchiefs, and cups and balls.

    One of Britain's most enduring and famous comedians tells us in his own inimitable style the fascinating and often hilarious story of his life. From disclosures of very painful personal tragedies to extraordinary and outrageously funny anecdotes about the stars he knew, his confessions are blisteringly honest, touching - and often shocking. Crying With Laughter combines heartache with hilarity, sexy showbiz revelations with genuinely moving tales of the hard times, and typically funny jokes with sobering personal reflections, to create a passionate, witty and sparkling account of an extraordinary man's extraordinary life.

    Author and comedian Sara Benincasa, now in her mid-thirties, had an absolutely harrowing early twenties and now, on the other side, she has a LOT of hard-earned wisdom and common sense to share.Real Artists Have Day Jobs includes 52 witty, provocative essays on how to live like a real adult—especially for those who have chosen a slightly more offbeat path to get there. Chock full of information and advice, Sara’s warm, smart, empathetic, and quirky voice is relatable to everyone from twenty-somethings and recent college grads to anyone a bit older who’s still trying to figure things out. While Sara doesn’t have all of life’s answers, this indispensable book has more than its share!Essays include:How to Read a Book, Real Artists Have Day Jobs, The Power of Being a Dork, Put Your Clutter in Purgatory, Ask for Exactly What You Want, Elect Your Own Executive Board.