When Betty and Veronica catch wind of the mash note, each believes the other one sent it, and all-out war is declared to determine who will win Archie's heart once and for all!

    When the elder Thaddeus Gropius confronts Wally with the boilerplate plot ultimatum that he must marry "the saddest girl in the world" or be disinherited, a yarn unravels that is part screwball comedy and part unhinged parable on the lucrativeness of changing your identity.Hensley's dialogue is witty, lyrical, sampled, dada, and elliptical--all in the service of a very bizarre mystery. There's sex, violence, rock and roll, intrigue, and betrayal--all brought home in Hensley's truly inimitable style.Created during an era when another well-off "W" was stuffing the coffers of the morbidly solvent, Wally Gropius transforms futile daydreams and nightmares into the absurdity of capital.

    Get an exclusive, behind-the-scenes at the incredible RESURRXION titles including X-MEN GOLD, ROYALS, X-MEN BLUE, and so much more!

    

    Try, "I was overcome by the urge to alphabetize my pets," or perhaps a simple "Had ninja trouble." Steve has used both these excuses, and here they are hilariously illustrated. He also has claimed to have become temporarily feral, accidentally sold himself on eBay, and gotten stuck in a romantic montage. An illustration of Steve with Darth Vader accompanies the inarguable excuse "I was seduced by the Dark Side." He also gets lost in his duvet, and discovers he has a rather unusual superpower.

    The mighty warrior Beowulf travels from his home to the great mead-hall of Hrothgar, king of the Danes, to face the marauding swamp-fiend Grendel, who is terrorizing Hrothgars kingdom and slaying his people. Beowulf and Grendel meet unarmed in the night-darkened hall, to battle to the death.

    This book follows the promising first date of Kim and Bruce who hook up to have a dysfunctional boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. Their friends offer help and advice along the way. Featuring vengeful, sarcastic, and hopeless love cartoons, anyone who has been in a relationship or is trying to find one for Valentine's Day will surely get a laugh out of this book.

    For centuries, lovers have found inspiration and advice in the ancient text of the Kama Sutra. Now, Simon Rich -- "one of the funniest writers in America" (The Daily Beast) -- and Farley Katz have unearthed a valuable new document: a guide to the positions most common after marriage. From "the interrupted congress" to "the beaching of the whales," here are the poses, positions, and games married lovers play to keep the spark alive -- and the dishwasher properly loaded. Complete with four-color, full-page illustrations in the style of the original Kama Sutra, but with modern, domestic accoutrements: dirty diapers, TV remotes, and wine glasses aplenty.

    4! It's time for more wild adventures starring the coolest superheroes around!First, Beast Boy is ready to save the world using his new super-power--the power to smell the future! Then, is Robin really the fulfillment of an ancient prophecy? Can the team answer the Justice League's call and take on the not-so-awesome responsibility of babysitting an infant Superman...Superbaby? And when a punk rock supervillain sentences Jump City to death by rock and roll, only the musical stylings of the Teen Titans can stop him!From the beach to H.I.V.E. Tower to the Titans Tower bathroom, the Teen Titans are here to save the day in these and more all-ages stories in TEEN TITANS GO! VOL. 4: SMELLS LIKE TEEN TITANS SPIRIT, from writers Sholly Fisch (THE ALL-NEW BATMAN: THE BRAVE AND THE BOLD), Derek Fridolfs (SCOOBY-DOO, WHERE ARE YOU?), artists Lea Hernandez (Killer Princesses), Marcelo Di Chiara (SMALLVILLE SEASON 11), Jeremy Lawson (Mighty Morphin Power Rangers) and more! Collects TEEN TITANS GO! #19-24.

    One with a whole lot more ghosts... and Ghostbusters! The two teams will have to learn to get along quickly, because a new foe from the Turtles past has followed them and aims to conquer NYC!

    But Gabe’s not alone: there’s Peter, who writes swear words in the margins of his papers; Jihyun, the Korean kid who subsists on Ho Hos and Doritos; and Camille, who follows Gabe around, trying to be his girlfriend. There’s also Gabe’s mom, who sleeps sixteen hours a day, and his dad, an elder who decides the fate of sinners (like the married couple who confesses to accidentally having anal sex). There’s Brother Miller, an elder with a Napoleon complex, who accompanies Gabe from door to door, encouraging him to knock with confidence, and Sister Feeney, who looks forward to the day she can move into a Spanish-style house after its owner dies at the end of the world. Luckily for Gabe, there is Uncle Jeff, who used to tour with Santana and now gives Gabe the only valuable girl advice he ever receives. It's hard when school days are spent dodging questions about your weird religion and weekends mean preaching house to house. Life looks dreary until Gabe falls for Camille’s beautiful older sister and begins to see her as the answer to his frustrations.

    Here is the plan. The plan is illustrated. The plan is quite complicated. But not too complicated. I think you will be thrilled by it. I am certain you will be thrilled by it.No need to read massive volumes or use the internetJUST READ THISONLY THIS

    It also happens to be hilariously funny and infectious in its bubbly charm, combining autobiography with a kind of magic science-fiction.

    

    He and his fiancée, Shelly, are assaulted by a gang of street thugs after their car breaks down. Eric is shot in the head and is paralyzed, and can only watch as Shelly is savagely beaten and raped. They are then left for dead on the side of the road.He is resurrected by a crow and seeks vengeance on the murderers, methodically stalking and killing them. When not on the hunt, Eric stays in the house he shared with Shelly, spending most of his time there lost in memories of her. Her absence is torture for him; he is in emotional pain, even engaging in self-mutilation by cutting himself.The Crow acts as both guide and goad for Eric, giving him information that helps him in his quest but also chastising him for dwelling on Shelly's death, seeing his pining as useless self-indulgence that distracts him from his purpose.